Bastard!! Heavy Metal, Dark Fantasy (2022) s01e09 Episode Script

Blue Nail

1
[dramatic music playing]
[Lucien grunting]
[Di-amon cackling]
Too bad for you.
You're just a little kid now,
Dark Schneider.
Killing him like this will be just as easy
as taking candy from a baby.
I hope you realize
no one will save you now!
[Di-amon yelling]
- [Kai yelling]
- No. Kai!
[Di-amon cackling]
Once I rid the world of him,
I will be unstoppable!
It'll be so fun to finally taste the blood
of Kall-Su and Nei
Kai! Kai!
[Kai groaning, grimacing]
[heart beating]
[Lucien grunting]
[Yoko gasping] Lucien, no!
What? What is this?
[Dark Schneider yelling]
[Dark Schneider yelling louder]
[opening theme music playing]
[music fades]
[goblins snarling]
BLUE NAIL
[ninjas yelling]
[goblin grunting]
[knight] Amazing.
[knight 2] The ninja army
is as good as the rumors say.
They're holding the horde of goblins back.
Their sword skills are incredible.
Yes.
And one person,
in particular, is quite impressive.
[Gara] Ugh.
There's no end to these goblins.
Hey!
You mind stepping aside for a minute?
[goblin snarling]
[Gara yelling]
[goblins screaming]
[Head Knight] Their leader,
the Ninja Master Gara!
[Gara chuckling]
[Gara] That did the trick.
[thundering footsteps approaching]
[goblins yelling]
Come on. This is getting real old for me.
What's taking him so long?
I don't have all day.
[Lucien groaning]
[Lucien screaming]
[Yoko gasping]
Let me out!
Let me out of this cage!
[all gasping]
Wait. But how?
[Di-amon growling]
Did that pathetic brat faint in fear?
I'm so scared!
[Yoko gasping]
Yoko, get me out of here!
You have to help me!
You damn vampire!
Let me out of here so I can destroy you!
I'm so scared, Yoko! Please, help me!
- I can't take this anymore!
- He's awake?
No way.
Then how is Dark Schneider talking?
[Lars] It's impossible!
Does this mean
they can exist at the same time?
[Dark Schneider yelling]
Yoko, you have to help me!
[Yoko] It can't be.
The power of Lucien's consciousness
and the sealing spell combined
are barely keeping Dark Schneider at bay.
[Di-amon cackling]
Go ahead and threaten me all you want,
but it's far too late for you to escape
from here now, you pathetic child!
Once I suck Sean Ari's blood,
my power will double.
[Sean grunting]
I'm not worried
about Dark Schneider in the slightest!
[gasping] Oh, no!
Time to drink!
- [yelling]
- [Yoko] Drink this!
[Yoko grunting]
Demon, you won't lay a single finger
on her while I'm here!
[Sean gasping]
[Di-amon growling]
You little brat! How dare you kick me!
Don't you understand
I'm a noble gentleman?
And if you ruin my beautiful face
[Yoko] Uh
I'll kill you!
[Di-amon grunting]
[Yoko screaming, grunting]
- [dramatic music playing]
- [Lucien gasping]
[Lars] It's time.
We need your power now.
Dark Schneider!
[Lucien grunting]
[Lucien screaming]
[Dark Schneider roaring]
No way!
- What's this? No way! Impossible!
- [Dark Schneider roaring]
Did he?
[inaudible]
It can't be!
Dark Schneider!
I can't believe my eyes!
You were actually able
to break the seal on your own?
[rock music playing]
I knew he would come.
[Yoko] Wait.
He broke free?
[Lars] Dark Schneider.
The ancient sorcerer who lives in darkness
and rules over death and destruction.
His power is infinite!
The kid in the cage escaped
and changed into this guy.
And he's actually the legendary sorcerer?
He's Dark Schneider?
[Dark Schneider exhaling slowly]
Oh no! Take a look
at that evil smirk on his face!
Yeah. I've never seen someone
who looks so evil before.
Have any of you guys?
I've never seen a guy
with a face like that.
He's gotta be twisted, right?
[Dark Schneider]
How dare you hurt my women, you idiot!
And to top it all off,
you even kicked Yoko.
How dare you hurt her!
Someday she'll be the woman
who bears my children!
Huh?
Ugh. What an idiot.
Wait. Did he really just say
what I think he just said?
[Kai groaning]
[Sean gasping]
[Sean panting] Kai!
You are a monster!
I'll destroy you!
Su, han, to, ste, lu.
[Di-amon exclaiming]
Not that spell!
Die, monster!
Riot!
[Di-amon screaming]
[soldiers screaming]
That's an advanced form
of the Balvolt spell!
[Di-amon screaming]
[Lars] Lightning spells and cooling spells
are two of the only types of magic
that work against vampires.
There's no way
that spell didn't injure him.
[rock music playing]
- [Di-amon screaming]
- Oh no! Count!
Count, are you okay?
[Di-amon cackling]
Is that all Dark Schneider's capable of?
Too bad it didn't work.
I guess the legendary sorcerer
isn't as powerful as everyone says he is.
Well, what a surprise.
[Di-amon cackling]
Oh no. No way.
[Dark Schneider grunting]
Oh, please. I can beat you!
You're not that strong.
Isn't that right, Jodoh?
[both cackling]
[Lars] This is bad!
The vampire is too powerful.
Crosses don't work against him,
so magic might not either.
And he has an immortal body,
so it's not
like we can use a weapon against him.
Damn. What are we going to do?
[Di-amon cackling]
I don't like your attitude.
I can tell from your smug smile
that you're looking down
on all of us right now
like you actually think
you'll be able to defeat me.
You're standing there thinking
you're the most powerful person
in the whole world, aren't you?
[Dark Schneider scoffing]
Well, yeah. Because I am
the most powerful person in the world.
Fine. Think what you want.
You act
like you're not afraid of anything.
But only noble beings, such as myself,
deserve to have an ego as big as yours is.
Today, I'll teach you the meaning of fear,
and wipe that smug smile
right off your face.
Understand?
[Dark Schneider laughing]
Give up now, vampire.
You don't stand a chance.
[Di-amon laughing]
Witness the magic of a noble!
Whoa! Check it out!
The Count's secret power!
Assassin!
[Dark Schneider screaming]
[Yoko screaming]
[Di-amon cackling]
Did you see that? I did it, Jodoh!
I killed the great sorcerer,
Dark Schneider, with my own spell!
[Lars' breath shuddering]
No!
Lucien.
You're so amazing, Count!
What a fantastic comeback!
He's incredible!
There's no one better
than the almighty Count!
I hope we could continue
to be of service to you.
[Di-amon cackling]
Why thank you, boys.
I know you're all in awe of me
after witnessing my power.
But don't just stand there.
It's time for you to prove your worth
and capture those female brats.
[all] Yes! As you wish!
[dramatic music playing]
[giggling]
Don't resist!
You'll make a great offering to the Count!
You're so lucky he'll suck your blood!
Talisman Magic!
- [all] Huh?
- Rasho Red Hot Waltz!
[soldiers screaming]
Insolent fool!
Don't you realize there's no hope
for any of you to escape from here now?
Stay back!
I won't let you hurt Kai again!
[Di-amon scoffing] You silly girl!
Dark Schneider was your last hope,
and look what happened to him.
He's just a pile of meat.
[Sean grunting]
[cackling]
[both cackling]
[Di-amon] Huh?
[Di-amon screaming]
[all gasping]
[Di-amon grunting, stammering]
[Di-amon] That's impossible! I thought I
[Di-amon grunting]
- [whimpering] What's happening?
- [squelching]
I can't I can't feel my legs, Count!
What have you done to me?
- Jodoh!
- [Dark Schneider laughing]
What a dumbass!
I can't believe you didn't even notice
how much I damaged your nervous system
with my lightning spell.
So now you won't be able to shoot
your magic in a straight line anymore.
[Di-amon growling]
You bastard!
How dare you mock me to my face?
Damn you!
- [Di-amon roaring]
- [Dark Schneider laughing]
What's wrong with you, O noble Count?
Finally showing your true colors, huh?
Who cares if I can't shoot straight?
Do you really think
that matters to me, you fool!
Take this!
- [rock music playing]
- [Di-amon roaring]
Di-amon Rotating Assassin!
[soldier shrieking]
Count! Please, stop!
[screaming]
[Di-amon cackling]
I can shoot magic in all directions!
There's no escape from me!
- [Sean screaming]
- [Yoko gasping]
[Dark Schneider] There is only one
universal law in a fight between two men.
Let me tell you.
The ugly meathead never wins
against the young hero.
Smart, handsome ladies man.
You know the drill.
[rock music playing]
Look at you.
From the moment I saw your face,
I knew you would die.
[Di-amon yelling]
Shut up! I'm a beautiful noble!
- [all gasping]
- What?
I'll give this back.
No. No way.
He managed to catch my magic spell.
You're the real monster, bastard!
[Dark Schneider] I'm not a monster,
you are!
[Di-amon yelling]
[Di-amon grunting]
[Di-amon cackling]
You idiot.
What exactly were you aiming for?
- [rocks crumbling]
- Huh?
Huh?
No!
[Di-amon screaming]
[Di-amon] The sun!
[Dark Schneider] So pathetic.
Someone like you
could never hope to scare me.
There's only one person
that I'm afraid of.
[birds chirping]
[Yoko grunting]
Huh?
He's turning into ash.
[footsteps approaching]
[exclaiming] No, now. Not our Count.
I can't believe
our Count got turned to ash.
[Lars] You did it! You beat Di-amon!
You destroyed the vampire for us!
No. Not quite yet.
- Take a look.
- [Lars exclaiming]
[Di-amon giggling, cackling]
[both gasping]
[Dark Schneider] Hmm?
[Di-amon] Did you forget
that a vampire's body
is basically immortal, Dark Schneider?
Hey. Look at that!
The Count has been resurrected!
Uh, no. I don't think so.
That's a giant bat!
[Di-amon] Don't forget! I am a noble!
I am a true-blooded vampire!
I am a ruler!
My name is Count Di-amon!
[Di-amon cackling]
[Di-amon] Dark Schneider,
you have no idea
where I could be now, do you?
Hey, Count! Where are you?
Yeah. Reveal yourself to us!
Where the hell is he?
I can't tell
where Di-amon's voice is coming from!
You fool!
[Di-amon choking]
[Di-amon grunting]
You bastard! How did you realize?
'Cause I've never seen
such an ugly-looking bat before.
Duh.
[Di-amon screaming]
What are you doing to me?
[Di-amon grunting]
Vampires turn into ash
when they're exposed to sunlight.
However, they say
that the vampire's spirit
will rise from the ashes as a bat.
He returns to his coffin
and sucks in the spirits of the earth.
Then, two days later, the bat is reborn
in the form of a vampire.
- Isn't that right?
- [Di-amon groaning]
What are you going to do?
Are you are you going to kill me now?
[scoffing] Let's not get ahead
of ourselves.
First, I'm gonna cast a spell.
And this little piece of flesh right here
is gonna be my catalyst.
Even if you are a vampire,
the spell will definitely work.
[Di-amon whimpering]
[Dark Schneider]
This is one of my all-time favorites.
Anyone subjected to it is doomed to fall.
It's an evil spell from ancient times.
No! Stop it! Stop it!
Please, don't do this!
Di-amon, you're an evil,
tough, arrogant, cruel, and funny man.
Quite frankly, I haven't decided
what I should do with you.
So I'll give you a chance
to choose whether you live or die.
O kings of the splatter rock,
come forth on the wings of this bat.
O demon of the night,
enter my nail, and seal our pact.
[cackling]
Using this blue nail, I'll dig the spell
directly into your body.
It'll be a part of you.
If you attempt to disobey me,
or if you ever try
to pull the nail out of your body,
then this blue nail is going
to turn purple, and eventually turn red.
The moment it becomes crimson red,
you will breathe your last breath,
Your body will be shredded into pieces,
put back together
in the form of a hideous creature,
and you will never be reborn again.
How do you feel about being
a disgusting and helpless toad?
[cackling]
[Di-amon screaming]
Stop, please! Have mercy on me!
Mercy? I don't have that.
Accused!
[frog croaking]
[Di-amon screaming]
Stop it! Stop it!
[Dark Schneider cackling]
How nice!
I love the sound of your screaming!
I love it! Come on!
Please, keep screaming for me!
[Dark Schneider cackling]
[Di-amon continues screaming]
I hate you! I hate you!
I hate you!
[Dark Schneider] You understand?
If you even think about disobeying me,
you will become a toad!
Oh my gosh!
He's such a demon! He's so cruel!
Let's run away! He's gonna kill us!
[all screaming]
[footsteps receding]
[Dark Schneider sighing]
That took longer than I expected it to.
But at least I'm done with him.
[Yoko exhaling]
Dark Schneider!
[Yoko] Uh
It's Kai. Kai's hurt. Please help!
[Sean sobbing]
[dramatic music playing]
[Dark Schneider sighing]
She's gonna be just fine.
If you get her treated
at the temple by tomorrow,
she won't turn into a vampire.
She's one of Arshes' followers.
And we all know how tough they can be.
Oh good. Thank goodness!
[Dark Schneider grunting]
Now Yoko, why don't you show me
where they kicked you.
Huh? Oh, I'm fine.
[Dark Schneider] But you were bleeding.
[Yoko grunting]
Come on!
Ugh! Ew! Stop it!
Come on!
Don't move, or I'll miss the spot!
I said that I'm fine!
Can you please stop licking me?
- [Sean gasping]
- [thudding]
- [Yoko screaming]
- [Dark Schneider grunting]
[Sean] Dark Schneider!
So, um, who's this girl?
Who? Do you mean Yoko?
Yes. Who is she?
[Yoko] Mm.
Yoko is the woman
who's going to bear my children someday!
[Sean gasping]
Yeah. That's not gonna happen!
There is nothing going on between us!
The two of us are just friends.
Wait. Why would you say that?
We're, like, a thing!
Shut up! I'm telling the truth!
If you were more like Lucien,
it would be different.
Hey Well Wait.
What are you talking about?
[Sean gasping]
But I'm so confused.
I don't understand why you told me
I was beautiful the other night.
Why did you hold me
when we were in bed together?
- Were you just playing around?
- Huh?
Why do you care?
Besides, you're the one who came onto me!
It's my policy not to refuse an overture.
We didn't even go all the way
and seal the deal.
What? How could you?
[slap landing]
I have absolutely no idea
what you've been up to,
but you don't have to act
like such a bastard to her!
That was very mean.
- [whimsical music playing]
- [Dark Schneider grunting]
That hurt.
[soldiers shouting]
Majinken! [grunting]
[goblins screaming]
[cackling]
Bring it on, you fools!
I'll hack you into little pieces!
[goblin screaming]
[sword clanging]
[Goblin Captain] That cretin!
We've got the best of the best
from the Dark Rebel Army
all gathered here,
but we're still no match for him!
That monster!
Hey! Listen up!
Let's charge!
[goblins shouting, roaring]
[ominous music playing]
[Kall-Su] Damn you, Gara.
Did you really have to betray us?
[Arshes] I'm not surprised
he changed sides.
In any case, I'll eliminate him myself.
So far, the Three Sorcerer Generals
have all fallen to Dark Schneider.
Do you understand this Arshes Nei?
And what makes that even worse is that
all three of them have switched sides
and are under his control now.
I sincerely hope
we will not encounter any more traitors.
What exactly are you implying, Abigail?
Nothing, Empress.
But knowing your past relationship
with the wizard,
it is possible
you could fall under his spell.
You were raised
by Dark Schneider, weren't you?
Don't be a fool!
Are you doubting my loyalties?
I don't care who you are,
I won't let you accuse me.
Understand?
[Abigail] Hmm.
Well, I did bring a bat wing here with me.
You'll use the Accused spell?
[Abigail cackling]
Arshes Nei, are you willing
to prove your loyalty to us
by undergoing the Accused spell,
and being in my control?
Ugh. Very well.
I shall prove to you that I am no longer
Dark Schneider's adopted daughter!
[Abigail] Hmm.
[ending theme music playing]
[music fades]
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