Battleground (2012) s01e02 Episode Script

1
- Uh, we were feeling pretty good.
- Yes, we were.
The debate had moved us up
to second place.
And Makers no longer
seemed unbeatable.
- No.
- And, uh
I was beginning to feel like
I was more a part of the group.
That's sweet.
Yeah, it had its downside.
TAK: But you think she's cute.
- We've noticed, we've seen this.
- Do you think Lindsey is cute?
BEN: I guess.
COLE: And you like her?
- I guess. I guess. Maybe.
- But you don't want to date her? Exactly.
- Right, right. Exactly.
- Liar.
- You're in love with her, Ben.
You know, Cole, I love water,
but I'm not gonna take a sip.
I get that. You just want
to hang out with her.
- Yeah, as a friend.
- Maybe you're not thirsty.
You're a guy, Ben. You're thirsty.
Also, I don't wanna negatively
affect our work environment.
Locationship's a part of our life,
Benjamin.
Who you gonna sleep with,
a reporter? Mm.
You should invite her
to the straw poll tonight.
And hurry up, Ben,
because vultures are circling.
Maybe when things calm down
a little bit.
This is a campaign,
things don't calm down.
You see the new Makers spot yet?
TAK: No, we were just having
a strategy meeting with Ben,
- which you have interrupted.
- Very rudely.
KJ should see this too.
She's at a Journalism class
with Samuels.
MAN [ON COMPUTER]:
State Senator Samuels hasn't come out
and said if she supports releasing
terrorists from Guantanamo Bay.
She hasn't come out and said if illegal
immigrants should get your tax dollars.
And she hasn't come out for
the preservation of marriage.
Tell us, State Senator Samuels,
why don't you come out with the truth?
Come out. Subtle.
Seems early for them to attack.
Think they're getting nervous?
- Yep.
- Can they do that?
It's a 527, so there's no fingerprints,
but it's Corboy.
No station is gonna run that.
- No need. It got 50,000 hits this morning.
TAK: That's their platform?
Don't vote for Samuels, she's a lesbian?
Right?
I've been training in Tukong Moosul
since I was about 10 years old.
It's a form of guerrilla street fighting
developed for
the Korean special forces.
Uh Basically, a combination
of Korean Taekkyon
and Chinese Shaolin kung fu.
Um And it taught me
that when you're hit,
hit back harder.
TAK: Makers has a new spot.
- We have bigger problems.
She used the eject word during a Q&A.
She used "astonish"?
- With the students?
- Mm-hm.
- She's never used it before.
- I know.
Some kid asked her
about a woman named Claire.
Have you ever heard Samuels talk about
Claire Viterol or Vitteral?
No. You pull her out of there?
- I told them we were late for an event.
- Good.
- Any cameras at the school?
- WISC.
Really?
They never cover our events.
What are they doing at a meet and greet?
I don't know. I didn't invite them. They
were just there when we showed up.
New commercial, now this.
Something's up.
Who is Claire Vi-- Va-- Ven--?
Villareal. She was my assistant
ten years ago at Oscar Meyer.
More.
There were people at the company
who thought there might be more
- to it than that.
- Was there?
SAMUELS:
No.
It's the same whisper campaign
as when I ran for State Senate.
Well, it's not a whisper anymore.
Now they have a bullhorn.
Let's have a press conference
and call Makers out on this bullshit.
TAK:
Let's wait a beat to see if it has legs.
I told you two months ago,
you guys have to tell us everything.
We can't protect you
unless we know what's coming.
- We told you everything.
- Some kid just asked about somebody
- I've never heard of.
- It's our personal life. It shouldn't matter.
- But it does.
GEORGE: It's a non-story.
We don't get to decide that, George!
Okay.
You don't rise ten points in a week
without taking some hits.
Let's just promise to be
completely honest with each other.
- Yeah.
TAK: Okay.
Tak, Ali's in your office
and she needs to see you right now.
Okay.
I'm gonna go take care of this,
you guys get together with Cole
maybe go over the speech
for the straw poll.
- How many tickets do we get?
- We're working on it.
- Do you actually vote with straw?
- No.
It's just a way to gauge
the momentum of a candidate.
Really, it's a fundraiser for the party.
How many people can you get to come to
a dinner and then vote for your candidate?
- Straw polls aren't real.
- So why do we do it?
Well, because the press cares.
We finish a strong second to Makers
and we make the front page tomorrow.
- What if we win?
- Not a chance in hell.
Makers' camp bought most of the tickets
to give them away at his rallies.
So you just show up at the rally
and then they give you tickets?
Benjamin, I would never condone you
taking Lindsey to the Makers rally
today at 1:00 at the capitol
and procuring a large sum of tickets
for tonight because that would be wrong.
Oh-- Of course.
- Of course.
- Good.
KJ:
Hey. Do you believe Samuels?
If you got nothing to hide,
don't act like you totally do.
ALI: Hey. JD's got the footage from
the school if you wanna check it out.
TAK: Hey, man.
- Hey. What's going on?
- Oh, you know.
- Just press this button twice.
Great.
Any education bill
that comes across my desk
must have provisions for art,
for theater, for music.
Thank you. Yes, you in the green shirt.
State Senator Samuels, can you tell me
who Claire Villareal is?
You know, I am always astonished
at how smart our kids are today.
- Curiosity is an underrated virtue.
- I'm sorry.
We actually are late for another event.
- Really?
- I'm afraid so.
Oh, that's-- Oh, that's right. Yeah.
Mrs. Bowman, thank you so much.
Thank you, guys.
Keep up the good work.
WOMAN: Thank you, Senator Samuels.
- Did you have a relationship with her?
Okay. That could've been worse.
Thanks, JD.
- You're welcome.
- Appreciate it.
- Anything on the blogs, Ali?
- Um
You know, a couple mention
that she left early, but no video yet.
Yet. You don't set a ball on a tee
if you don't plan on swinging.
Most of Makers' supporters think
the Internet is witchcraft anyway.
KJ, did all the students have
their questions written down?
No, just her.
Interesting. Find out who she is.
Somebody gave her that card,
- I wanna know who.
- On it.
WISC on the phone,
they wanna talk about this morning.
TAK: Fore.
- You want me to take it?
- No. Will you hang with me though?
- Yeah.
Is this the Big Dog? Hey!
Yeah, well, the kids asked
a lot of great questions.
We got a chance to talk about our plan
to bring 200,000 jobs
to the state of Wisconsin.
[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY]
I know. It was a scheduling snafu,
what do you do?
Okay, I gotta run. Okay, take it easy.
- You're a good liar.
- Was it good?
It was good.
So you're okay
with Lindsey dating Jordan?
What?
I mean, if that's what she wanted.
Yeah, I did some feature extra work
on Public Enemies.
- You see that flick?
LINDSEY: Mm-mm.
I was up at the counter
when Johnny started yelling at everybody.
I think I got a screen shot on my phone.
Hey, Lindsey, I'm supposed to go over
the canvassing portfolio with you.
- Uh, the what?
- The canvassing portfolio.
- No problemo. I'll e-mail it to you later.
- Thanks.
- What's a canvassing portfolio?
- Um
I don't know. Ha-ha.
- It sounded campaign-y.
- Oh.
Uh, um I was wondering if you wanted
to go to Makers' rally
and see if we can grab some tickets
for the speech tonight.
Ben, that seems dishonest.
You're right, it is dishonest.
I'm very sorry. I shouldn't have--
- I am giving you shit. Ha-ha.
- Okay.
- I'm in.
- Okay.
TAK: It's gonna be a thing.
- They're running it?
Ten o'clock, possibly the lead.
Well, maybe we'll get lucky
and there will be a tragedy by then.
- Benjamin.
BEN: Yeah?
- I need you to hijack a bus.
BEN: Ha-ha-ha.
Whatever happens, Ben,
just keep driving. Okay?
I know you guys are joking.
- Yeah, they're joking.
- Good.
I'm pretty sure they're joking.
I know. I just have to stay in Madison
for a few more days.
Okay? When I get home, we're gonna
go to Night Owls for ice cream.
Okay, I love you. Let me talk to Mommy.
Hey, I thought I could get down there,
but some stuff just hit, so
Yeah. Hey, maybe when you guys could
come up, we'll do the farmer's market.
Okay? Yeah. I-- Yeah, I gotta go.
Okay. Okay, bye.
- What's up?
- We're in a shit storm
and you're making a personal call?
George, this is the blowback
we knew was coming.
- I already talked to WISC.
- And?
Corboy's screaming that it's a story.
- We left an event early.
- They thought it was the question.
Why?
Because it was.
I'll talk to them.
Look, they should be doing something
about that bullshit ad that Makers put out.
That's exactly what they want.
That's exactly what Corboy wants.
Then they get on the news
and say they didn't make it.
Meanwhile, it plays for free
on every station at 5, 6 and 10.
So when are we holding
the press conference?
We don't want to make it a bigger deal.
Let's be clear. When we say we want
a press conference, you say, "What time?"
No.
No?
No. I will always tell you what I think.
What you do afterwards is your business,
but that's my job.
Your job is to win this election.
I would start focusing on that
and not other things.
[CLEARS THROAT]
[SIGHS]
Can I talk to you for a second?
JD: Yeah, sure.
- Yeah, cool.
Great. Right in here.
- It's JD, right? Right.
- Yeah.
[SIGHS]
I need you to not use any of that,
if that's cool.
- Of the--?
- Thanks, yeah. Just any of this.
Well, I can't promise
that we won't use it
- but I'll try not to
- Mm.
Okay, I'm not asking you.
I'm telling you that you're not using
any of this stuff because it didn't exist.
- Okay? That's pretty clear.
- Okay.
- Yeah. That's pretty clear.
- Thanks. I really appreciate it.
All right, cool.
[MOUTHING]
(bleep) you.
TAK: I go first.
- Go. Just go.
- Oh!
- Three, that's three.
- It was very close. Three.
TAK: Oh
It looks like WISC is the only one
doing something on the school.
Of course.
Makers could choke a baby deer
to death at a fundraiser,
they wouldn't mention it.
Their license is up next year
and Makers is on the oversight committee.
Unbelievable. We should just
start making up stories.
Did you hear Makers is a robot?
TAK: A killer robot.
- A senile killer robot.
You would've thought
that would've gotten out by now.
- Big story.
KJ: Okay, boys.
I'm gonna go call the news director,
see if I can get it moved.
And you guys work on focusing.
- Yes.
- Absolutely.
- Let's focus on Ben.
- Mm.
[IN BRITISH ACCENT] The young buck,
just barely out of the womb,
tentatively begins his mating ritual.
LINDSEY:
I have 68 signs.
Uh I have one more than that.
- Sixty-nine.
- Yep.
- Ben, are you embarrassed by a number?
- No!
- No, that would be lame.
JORDAN: What's up, kittens?
A hunter enters the woods
and makes his way towards the prey.
- What time are we hitting Makers' event?
- I'm sorry?
[IN BRITISH ACCENT]
The young buck is no match
for the awkward aggression
of the hunter.
Some volunteers said we're sneaking into
the Makers rally, get tickets for tonight?
Yes. Do you want to come to that?
Special ops? You know I'm in.
I will get us beaucoup tickets.
- Lindsey, I'll drive with you.
LINDSEY: Yeah?
Cool. I'm out.
And the young deer has been slain
by the awkward aggressor.
To the victor go the spoils.
For the loser,
another cold winter alone awaits.
BEN:
Are you guys talking about us?
BOTH [IN NORMAL VOICE]:
Nope.
The projections of--
- Numbers.
- Yep.
Because we got a big speech.
TAK: I would love to see
if there's any carryover.
Debate. Carryover.
I figured the girl wrote
for the school newspaper.
There's only four girls on the masthead.
Put their names into Facebook,
matched her from the video,
her name is Lisa Cross
and we are now Facebook friends.
How do you do that?
Created a Facebook profile
of a hot guy and friended her.
She's in a relationship with Eric Hartin,
so I friended him too.
- Hot girl?
- I'll be.
Check it, Eric's dad is the precinct captain
for Makers in Middleton.
- Look at his wall.
- He's got 50 people congratulating him.
ALI: Mm-hm. What's worse
is that he plays "FarmVille."
He's gonna bug me for seeds.
[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
The tradition is that each candidate
talks for ten minutes, no notes,
and then everyone at the dinner votes.
- Should have bought more tickets.
- We don't have the money.
We've got some volunteers
at the Makers rally trying to get some.
I'll pretend I didn't hear that.
[WHISPERING]
But I love it.
It's not gonna be about who wins,
it's about who gets second place.
Yeah, so let's keep it light, the cabin story,
the thing about your dog,
and then we'll close with
Washington is broken.
- And the game.
- Excuse me?
[IN NORMAL VOICE] In high school
I won the basketball state championship.
TAK: That's great.
- Yeah.
- Well, you're worried though, huh?
- Well, uh--
- Too butch?
TAK: Uh
I get it. Most of the state
doesn't know who I am,
the rest think I'm that lesbian
from Madison.
Look, we've got Madison,
Makers is gonna get Milwaukee.
We just need
the good people of Green Bay
not to think you're gonna paint a rainbow
on the capitol dome.
Wouldn't that be beautiful?
Maybe a little pink triangle on top?
[ALL CHUCKLE]
SAMUELS: Tell me what's going on, kids.
- Rudy is on at 8, Makers is on at 8:15,
- and you're on at 8:45.
- Why the extra 15 minutes for Makers?
They're gonna serve dessert
in between your speeches.
Wait a minute.
I'm talking in front of 10,000 people
with no notes,
while they're eating dessert?
Do you know how distracting that is?
I'm on it. Just remember:
Cabin, dog, broken. C.D.B.
KJ: You okay?
- Yep.
When Tak said he would take care
of something, he would.
If Samuels wanted the dessert served
before Makers made his speech,
it would get done.
I rarely saw him fail.
MAN: So, yeah, it looks good.
It looks good. Here.
Rearrange it a little bit.
That looks good.
You're going to table one, right?
TAK:
Yeah, okay, sure. I'll tell him right now.
Hey, guys, sorry to interrupt.
Chairman wants to do dessert at 8:15.
- Eight-fifteen? We were told 8:45.
- Yeah.
They moved it up. They want to do it
right before Makers' speech.
Okay, sure. Uh, sir, who are you?
Chairman's advanced man
for the committeeship.
Okay, 8:15, that's now. Go, go.
- I thought you gave up smoking.
- Uh, I did.
- This is just a water cigarette.
- May I?
You may.
- Oh, sit? You don't want this.
- I don't want the cigarette.
It's supposed to help me quit.
By drowning?
Yeah. Mm-hm. By drowning.
How's Rudy doing in there?
Stump speech. Word-for-word.
- "Not a dime in my pocket."
- "Not a dollar in my bank."
[IMITATES SOBBING]
That's good.
That's, like, a great impression.
Thank you.
We watching the game tomorrow?
Yeah. Let's do Dotty's at 1?
- Okay.
- Okay.
Tak. Tak, it was amazing.
They gave us ten tickets each.
We got half our volunteers in.
I pretended to be a youth pastor.
I was pretty convincing, so
- Overplayed it.
- I don't think that's correct.
As adorable as this is, I gotta get
backstage. Great work, you guys.
- We also-- We got you a T-shirt.
- Good, for my real doll.
[MAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY
OVER MICROPHONE]
TAK: Hey.
- Hey.
You remember Rebecca
from the Rudy campaign?
TAK: I do. You worked
for my father in '94. Hudson.
Yeah. Until he fired me.
TAK: Yeah. It's that or he sleeps with you.
- Sometimes both.
- How's Makers doing?
- He's rattled. They started eating dessert
- and he got totally lost.
- Good for us. Keep me updated, okay?
CORBOY: Okay? You understand me?
TAK: Corboy!
- Tick Tak! What's going on, buddy?
- Everything all right?
Yeah, good.
Looks like they served dessert a little early.
Wonder who told them to do that.
Maybe it was a precinct captain
in Middleton.
- We had nothing to do with that, Tak.
- The coming-out spot?
We're gonna condemn it
in a press conference tomorrow.
Bump, set, spike.
Shouldn't you be working
on a concession speech?
What's up? Oh, I'm sorry, I can't hear.
The silverware, it's so loud.
- Excuse me, Everest.
- You shouldn't worry about that, Tak.
What you need to worry about
is who told us about Claire.
Got it. Hey, thanks for the tickets.
SAMUELS:
This is the time. This is the moment.
TAK:
She looks good.
- She looks pretty good.
- She looks better than you.
WISC pushed it back. Their lead is
Makers forgetting his speech.
- Great.
- Also, I told the program director
- that you'd go out with him. Cool?
- Does he have a mustache?
- I have really sensitive skin.
- I'll tell him to shave.
- Shave all over!
KJ: Got it!
We should hold off
on the press conference.
- Yeah.
- Voters need to see us as a couple.
It will only give it new life.
The best defense is a good offense.
[SAMUELS SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY
OVER MICROPHONE]
Mm. Ooh. Ooh.
That one's my favorite.
- Mine's "110 percent."
- Also good.
- With double fists.
- Yeah.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
What do you think Corboy meant,
"worry about who told us"?
- What, about Claire?
- Yeah.
Um
I don't know, maybe
he's just messing with us.
- Yeah. Let's hope so.
SAMUELS: You win.
Just like I won the state basketball
championship in high school.
[AUDIENCE CLAPPING]
- She's unbelievable. I love it.
- She just doesn't care.
- Game tomorrow?
- I can't. I'm watching it with KJ.
Oh.
Cool.
[SAMUELS SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
That was the moment.
That is the moment.
[IMITATES EXPLOSION]