Bodkin (2024) s01e03 Episode Script

Perfectly Innocent Life

1
[eerie music playing softly]
["Peacach" by IMLÉ playing]
[Gilbert] I'm scared of death.
But aren't we all?
What lies on the other side?
Every death forces us
to look in the mirror,
to think about our own demise.
That's why we need ritual,
something which allows the living
to move on,
letting us bury the secrets of the dead,
forever.
But secrets are a funny thing.
They have a way
of clawing their way back to the surface.
[lyrics in Irish]
[music fades out]
Think his family will mind us being there?
We hardly knew Darragh.
It's not a funeral, Sizergh. It's a wake.
Knowing the deceased isn't necessary.
Getting smashed in their honor is.
Ah, it's good craic. I've been to wakes
where I barely even knew 'em.
- [Seamus] No respect for the dead.
- [brakes squeal]
No respect for the dead.
I'll fuckin' kill him.
I'll fuckin' kill him.
No! Are you fucking stoned?
What the hell are you doin'?
You come back from California
with your slimy tech
- What the hell?
- [Seamus]and you think you own the town?
Take a look at the state of the place!
- I can't believe this, Fintan.
- [Sean pants]
Dead Darragh isn't even cold yet,
and here ya are,
settin' out your wares for a party.
Is he okay?
[grunts] Have you no respect?
A man is dead,
and you're preparing some cheap disco.
Darragh gave this festival his blessing.
- [mutters]
- And a signed contract.
Unlike some people, he could see
what we're trying to do here.
To bring this town together
for something positive.
You lanky wanker.
I ought to rip your fuckin' tongue out.
Try it. I'll sue you
till you can't even afford to breathe.
[Sean] Seamus, relax.
[Seamus huffs]
[breathing agitatedly]
Fuck you, Shitpants.
[tense music playing]
- [footsteps departing]
- [Emmy clears throat]
[exhales sharply]
Bodkin is changing, Seamus.
The future's gonna happen,
whether you like it or not.
[children giggling]
Back to work now! Chop-chop!
You're right, Gilbert.
He is a really nice guy.
- [Gilbert sighs]
- [whimsical music plays]
Would you look at all this nonsense?
- It's a lot of fuss.
- [groans] No.
The last Samhain Festival
ended in disaster,
not to mention the vandalism
and wanton destruction of property
that took place.
As head of the Samhain Safety Committee,
I assumed your podcast
would be very interested
in hearing our perspective on it.
I'd rather listen to fuckin' paint dry.
[woman 1 sobs, blows nose]
[snivels] Thanks so much.
[spluttering] I just So sorry.
Thanks for coming.
Make yourself a cuppa tea.
[wails, sobs]
Jaysus, the lungs on her.
- Who are they?
- Darragh's two sisters, down from Mayo.
Whole place is theirs now.
Looking to get a pretty penny for it.
[chuckles]
You sure it's okay
to just turn up like this?
- Darragh's family are in mourning.
- [Dove] Exactly.
So they're throwing a three-day party
to cheer themselves up.
Besides the Badger is in there.
He and I need to have a little chat.
[splutters] I'll talk to Seamus,
all right?
You'll just scare him off. All right?
For all we know, he's been living
a perfectly innocent life all this time.
[scoffs] Men like him don't change.
Think about it. I get run over.
Sean's car is set on fire.
And now Darragh's "accident."
- You really think he was murdered?
- Let's not jump to conclusions, all right?
Our job is to ask questions,
not to make wild assumptions.
[Emmy] Okay.
[whimsical music continues]
- Sorry for your loss. Sorry.
- Thank you.
- [woman 2 sobbing]
- [indistinct chatter]
Ah, how're ya, Bob?
[indistinct chatter]
[boy] Let's go! Let's go! Get your jacket!
Run! Run! Excuse me!
Coming through! Coming through!
[music fading out]
[woman 3] Do you like the makeup?
Did it myself.
What are you, the undertaker or something?
I am, actually.
Mary Donovan,
Donovan and Sons Funeral Home.
"Sons"?
My brothers were more squeamish
than anticipated.
And you are?
Dove. Uh I'm curious,
was there an autopsy on Darragh's body?
You only carry out an autopsy
when the death is suspicious,
which Darragh's was not.
- Poor man just tripped and hit his head.
- How can you be so sure?
Angle of the fall, depth of the wound.
A blood alcohol level
that could strip paint.
On behalf of the family,
I'd like to thank you all
for coming to pay your respects.
[speaking in Irish]
[all, in English] Amen.
Hail Mary, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst women.
And blessed be the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.
[all] Holy Mary, mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Hail Mary, full of grace,
the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.
[all] Holy Mary, mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
[priest] Hail Mary, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst women.
Blessed be the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
[all] Holy Mary, mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
- [whispers] We should recor
- [speaking in Irish]
[prayer continues in background]
[crowd continues praying indistinctly]
- [sniffs]
- [muffled praying continues]
Egg and tuna in the one sandwich.
Bafflin'.
[inhales] Sad day.
Poor Darragh.
What was his second name?
[scoffs softly]
Thought so.
You ought to be ashamed of yourself,
picking over honest people's grief
like a vulture.
I'm a journalist.
[scoffs] Of course you are.
And I know it's fun for you city folk
to come down here and gawp at us.
But our lives aren't fodder
for your entertainment.
Well, you seem pretty interesting to me.
Well now, I might have
an interesting story for you.
Let's say
I work for the British government,
and I want to whistleblow
about a bunch of data breaches
in the healthcare system.
- So I tell my story to a journalist
- [tense music drones]
who promises me all sorts of anonymity,
but somehow, on the very day
said journalist publishes her story,
my name is leaked.
And my life is turned upside down.
Well, I just might end up killing meself.
All because of this journalist's
glaring incompetence. [chuckles]
[tense music continues]
You want to be careful gawping.
You never know who'll gawp back.
Mm!
Nice sausages, mind.
[country music plays over stereo]
[indistinct chatter, laughter]
[Cathal chuckles] The Rolling Stones
is the best band ever.
Wild Horses. Think about it.
Wild Horses. Doesn't get any better.
- Paint It, Black.
- You can't go wrong with the Stones.
[Cathal] I don't know why they try
to make new songs anymore.
[indistinct chatter]
[men laughing heartily]
You look very relaxed
for a man who's up to his ears in debt.
[nervously] Th-This isn't really the
the time or or the place to be
[snorts] I'm fucking with you.
[chuckles] Relax. It's a party.
No money talk. [chuckles]
- What is she talking about?
- Uh, nothing. Nothing.
[splutters] Uh, so,
were you close with with Darragh?
No, not really.
We had a few business dealings
over the years.
Okay, and was he, uh,
friends with Malachy?
Who?
Malachy, the guy
who disappeared on Samhain.
I didn't know him.
What about you?
What were you doing on Samhain?
Sounds like it was a pretty crazy night.
I wouldn't know.
I missed the entire thing.
I gave my pal Greta
a lift to Dublin that night,
but by the time I got back,
it was all over.
Yeah.
All right. I'm going in.
I'm gonna see what I can tease out
about Darragh and Malachy.
Great. I'll try to see
if I can find anything too.
All right.
[country music continues]
[Dove sighs deeply]
[under breath] Fuck's sake.
Can offer you a real drink,
if you're interested.
Homemade poitín,
guaranteed to change any mood.
For better or worse?
It's good stuff. I make it in the bathtub.
[scoffs] Yeah, I don't think going blind
will cheer me up.
Find your own drink, then,
if you're so chickenshit.
[coughs] Jesus fucking hell.
I age it with formaldehyde.
It adds character,
if you know what I mean.
- You
- [laughs]
You're some easy mark, you know that?
That's the spirit.
[sighs]
Jesus. Why are the sexy ones
always so moody?
[coughs, splutters]
- [sighs]
- [Mary inhales deeply, clears throat]
[Dove sniffles]
[sighs]
[chuckles softly]
Uh
That should do it.
He was as sweet as an angel, was Darragh.
Never a bad word for anyone.
[whimsical intriguing music playing]
I spent months trying to shift Darragh,
but he said that he wanted to wait
until he was married,
so I married Tommy here.
Now, with Tommy,
I had the opposite problem.
He's like a rabbit.
[priest] Darragh used to be quite devout,
but he never attended Mass again
after his spell away.
I thought he never left the farm.
[chuckles] Well, it's
it's a long time ago now.
Do you know where he went?
You know yourself,
a nod is as good as a wink
to a blind man, huh?
Is that Edna O'Shea I see there?
You're kinda interesting, aren't you?
[amused scoff] I've been called worse.
Yeah, I bet.
[inhales] Trade you one for one.
All right. You go first.
[inhales deeply]
[clears throat, sighs]
[clicks tongue]
I traded Bodkin for London.
Small town, big dreams.
Fell in love, fell out of love. [chuckles]
Turns out, I am better
at handling dead ones than live ones,
so I came home.
We have plenty of dead ones in London.
Yeah, but not so many wakes.
Where would I meet anyone new?
[Dove chuckles softly]
[Mary chuckles softly]
You know, normally,
people who take themselves so seriously
are kind of a pain in the ass,
but on you, it is kind of cute.
[tender music plays]
[scoffing chuckle]
You're drunk.
Yeah, well, I'd want to be.
This stuff is about 90% proof.
Can we cut to the chase?
- [cell phone vibrates]
- I wa
[cell phone vibrating]
Excuse me.
Damien.
- Bye, then.
- [door opens]
He's the fuckin' Badger, Damien.
An infamous smuggler,
missing-slash-presumed dead,
living all this time
down in bloody Bodkin.
- This could be huge.
- [Damien] Stop. Stop.
Wha I haven't even told you
the best bit
[Damien] I mean it. Stop. Breathe.
Don't tell me to breathe, Damien.
I'm always fuckin' breathing.
[Damien] They got a warrant
to search your flat.
They found Krtek's laptop.
Now the Home Office think
that you stole it.
They are launching
a formal investigation against you.
- [unsettling music plays]
- That's bullshit. I didn't steal it.
He asked me to mind it.
It's standard practice.
[Damien] No, Dove, it's not.
It's government property.
The guy was scared shitless.
He came to me for help.
What was I supposed to do?
[Damien] You were supposed to tell me
so this wouldn't hit me like a train!
Damien, you know this is bullshit.
Th-They're punishing me
for breaking the story.
I mean, they're the ones
that fucking leaked his name.
[Damien] I think you need to come home.
[breathes nervously]
Oh, now you want me home?
I find a story here, an actual story,
and you want me home to defend myself
against faceless bureaucrats
who've got their knickers in a twist?
No, not a chance.
[Damien] Dove it's serious.
Yeah, of course it's fuckin' serious,
so I need you to step up, vouch for me.
Tell them I mentioned it to you
at the time.
[Damien] Lie for you, you mean?
- You're meant to protect me, Damien.
- [Damien sighs]
You really think there's a story
in this Badger thing?
100%.
[Damien] Keep on it, then.
I'll see what I can do from here. [sighs]
[keypad clacks]
[shakily] Fuck.
[unsettling music fades out]
["I'm a Ramblin' Man"
by Waylon Jennings playing]
Down through New Orleans ♪
Yes, I have ♪
I've played in California ♪
There ain't too much I haven't seen ♪
No, there ain't ♪
Lord, I'm a ramblin' man ♪
Don't fool around with a ramblin' man ♪
[music continues]
Did you, uh, know Darragh well?
Well as you can know anyone, I suppose.
It seems like he was a good man.
Yeah, he was.
Good friend.
Helped me out a lot.
[softly] He was
[voice breaks] He was good to my brother.
- Does your brother live around
- You know that Dove woman?
[splutters] Uh, what about her?
I mean, she's a fiercely
irritating individual.
Yep. Can't argue with you there.
The type of woman
who'd start a fight in an empty room.
Yeah, she's, uh, very driven.
Huh, you see I had a different word.
[chuckles softly]
Oh, would you excuse me a moment?
- [Gilbert] Sure.
- Why don't you grab us some drinks?
Lord, I'm a ramblin' man ♪
Don't mess around with a ♪
I heard them lads that went missing
had their arms and legs chopped off.
Hey, you wanna come around mine later?
I've a big secret I could show you.
- [boys laugh]
- Get the fuck, the lot of you!
Bunch of inbred scobes.
- [Sean] Piss off, would ya, yeah?
- I was in the middle of something.
They don't know shit.
A bunch of cowboys looking for the ride.
What does that make you?
I'm the horse whisperer, darlin'.
Does that line ever work?
Eh Yeah, sometimes. You'd be surprised.
I really would.
Don't lump me in
with those culchies though.
I'm better than this lot here.
I'm made for more.
- Like what?
- More than anyone here can imagine.
I've already survived an orphanage.
Nobody knows what I've been through.
I I don't belong here.
Do you know what I mean?
I actually do, yeah.
If you fancy,
we can jump in the back of my car
and search together?
Jesus. Sean!
- [gate clangs]
- Oh.
Hey, I was jokin'.
It was a joke, obviously.
We we can jump in the front.
[Emmy] Dove, what are you doing?
My job.
[huffs]
[huffs]
Shall I come with you?
No.
[scooter whirs]
[Emmy sighs]
[country music playing]
Having fun, pet?
Loads.
[inaudible]
Wasn't sure how much milk you took.
I hope it's okay.
[woman] No, that's perfect.
I'd murder a cuppa tea.
Excuse me.
Hi there. I'm Emmy.
I just wondered
if I could talk to you about the
So this podcast of yours,
it's about Samhain, right?
The disappearances?
Yes, but it's about the town too.
We wanna talk with people,
see where the story takes us.
Good luck getting any sense
out of anyone in this town.
[cell phone chiming, beeps]
Claire, where are you?
Have you heard from the PA guys?
Fleetwood Mac are bog-standard,
Top 40 shite.
That's what your taste in music is, shite.
And they should be flushed down the toilet
where they belong.
You should flush yourself down after them.
You're full of it, shite.
[Barry] Here. Hold that.
- Do you want one of these?
- [Cathal] No, go on.
- Drink?
- [Cathal] I don't wanna hear another word.
You lovely man.
You know, so many people have said
such kind things about Darragh.
Thank you.
You know, it-it-it's funny,
because he told me
that he never left this place,
but then I was hearing about a time
that he did leave town?
[softly] Oh.
[hesitates]
We should have a word.
- In private.
- [Gilbert] Of course.
Sorry if I was rude earlier.
Sometimes this place makes me so mad,
I forget why I came back.
[country music continues]
I imagine Bodkin's a bit
of a culture shock for you.
You don't know anything about me.
Hello. I'm Fintan.
Sorry for being a dick just then.
You seem cool and interesting,
and I'd like to talk to you.
And hopefully,
we can have a full conversation
before you realize
how painfully socially awkward I am.
Tsk. Good pivot.
That's the first law of tech,
interpret the data and adapt.
[Emmy] Tsk.
Nicely done.
[whimsical music playing]
[music fades out]
Like, you have your ups
and downs with family,
but at the end of the day,
they're your own flesh and blood.
You don't want anyone
to be thinking ill of them.
Yeah, of course.
I mean, we wouldn't want
to upset either you or your sister
in-in your hour of grief.
The last thing the family wants
is for Darragh to be remembered
for his mistakes.
Yeah, uh, of course.
No point dragging it over the coals now.
[sobs] Thank you.
I mean, we were mortified
when he was sent to prison.
But then he comes back
with that boy Malachy in tow.
Nothing was ever the same again.
Yeah, Darragh and and Malachy
met met in prison.
Yeah.
I could never understand it.
[inhales shakily]
Darragh thought the world of him.
He was heartbroken
when Malachy disappeared.
I tried to comfort him,
but he never really listened to me.
Sure, he always confided in Alice.
[sighs] Oh, but I loved him so much.
Course you did.
- [sobs] I did. I loved him.
- Course.
[crying]
- [intriguing music playing]
- [electric scooter whirring]
[locked door rattling]
[music continues]
[locked door rattling]
[breathes heavily]
In for a penny [grunts]
So what do you remember of Samhain?
- [country music playing]
- [Fintan sighs softly]
I, uh
I saw Jackie Lantern.
Who?
He's this mythic blacksmith who's doomed
to wander the earth for eternity.
When we were kids, we'd dare each other
to go to the bog lake on Samhain,
because that's where
Jackie Lantern turns up.
And?
Well can I be honest?
I was 14 at the time,
and, uh, I'd recently discovered
magic mushrooms.
And I was trying to show off to a girl,
so I took shrooms, ended up there.
And you saw him?
Oh yeah.
I saw a huge, hulking, hideous monster
emerging from the bog on Samhain.
- You're making this up.
- I'm not.
I swear.
[Emmy chuckles softly]
Nice view.
All I see is shit.
Fields and fields of shit.
Besides, every second here
is another moment away
from my poor sick Maurice.
He has the cancer, you know.
How long have you been married?
Maurice is my cat.
No one understands, do they?
You know, how much our cats mean to us.
Do you have a cat?
Oh yeah.
[chuckles] Two.
What breed are they?
You know, they're, uh
Strays is the best way to describe it.
I got them from a rescue.
[inhales deeply]
- Good man.
- [chuckles softly]
[breathy mutter]
So Dot mentioned how heartbroken
Darragh was when Malachy went missing.
They must have been great friends.
"Friends"?
That's one word for it, I suppose.
What do you mean?
Don't be daft.
Poor Darragh obviously dug
with the other foot.
[softly] Oh.
W Were they together?
Hardly.
Malachy never seemed
to return my brother's feelings,
but he did exploit them.
Malachy kept Darragh on a short leash.
Made him rent that land to him
for years for next to nothing.
Everyone could see it but Darragh,
the great big eejit.
Then Malachy disappeared.
And his brother just waltzed into town,
took over the lease at the same rate.
[inhales deeply]
He let those two good-for-nothing brothers
just take advantage of him.
So Malachy had a brother?
Of course.
Weren't you talking to him earlier?
It's Seamus Gallagher.
- Oh.
- [somber intriguing music playing]
[sighs softly]
[suspenseful music playing]
[mechanism clacks]
[clack]
And then the devil gave Jackie
a hot coal in a turnip.
It's why you carve pumpkins on Halloween.
You'd think the Devil would give you
something more useful
[chuckles]like a car.
[country music playing]
[inhales] Um, so, what did he look like?
- Who?
- Jackie Lantern.
Oh.
Very big.
Very frightening.
Only the bravest of boys can look at him.
- And that's you, is it?
- It's a blessing and a curse.
You know, I I haven't thought
about that night in so long. God, I
I think there was some sort
of a car crash that night too.
Where?
I didn't, uh see it.
I I I just heard this screeching
and and then a huge crash,
and then this bloodcurdling scream
over near the Casement Road.
But when I finally got over there,
there was no sign of a crash at all.
Nothing.
But that's when I saw Jackie,
out in the distance,
coming out of the bog lake.
What did Jackie do?
Honestly,
I don't know.
I ran away.
But only for very impressive
and manly reasons.
[chuckles] So brave.
The bravest.
[both chuckle]
[intriguing music resumes]
[sinister music plays]
[exhales]
Yeah, Gilbert,
such a nice guy.
Then you hear some tech bro's in town,
and you imagine someone, um
Someone
[hesitates] A bit cooler than you.
[both chuckle]
- You're mean.
- Mm, I'm just interpreting the data.
- Hey, have you seen Dove?
- She left.
Left for where?
Incredible as it is to believe,
she didn't talk through her plans with me.
Do you mind? [exhales]
Thank you.
Um uh, but listen,
you have to hear this, okay?
Fintan saw something
on the night of Samhain.
Saw what?
He heard a car crash outside of town
and a scream,
then saw a mythical blacksmith
from Irish folklore coming out of a bog.
Okay, well, get it on tape.
Maybe it'll add to the general mood.
Y You said you wanted folktales.
Yeah, uh, text me if you see Dove.
[irritated huff]
- All good?
- Mm-hmm. [chuckles softly]
Just a thought.
You want a change of scenery?
Um
You need to ask permission?
No. [chuckles awkwardly]
Let's go.
[somber suspenseful music playing]
[music fading out]
- Don't stop thinking about tomorrow ♪
- [all] Stop thinking about tomorrow ♪
Don't stop, it'll soon be here ♪
It'll be here, better than before ♪
Yesterday's gone, yesterday's gone ♪
[men cheering, laughing]
[woman] Hang on.
[men] Don't stop
Thinking about tomorrow ♪
Don't stop ♪
Mwah!
Sleeping beauty.
- Don't stop ♪
- Tommy!
Right, lads I don't need to tell you
how important it is to protect the goods.
Yeah?
[Sean] Hup.
[clears throat]
Fuck off.
Nice ride.
[clatters]
You're not gonna believe what I found out.
You're not gonna believe what I found out.
- [jaunty traditional Irish music playing]
- [indistinct chatter]
[laughing]
Wha
- Seamus and Malachy were brothers?
- Yes.
Okay, but why would they come here
and rent Darragh's land?
Well, the coastline
is incredibly difficult to police.
It's a perfect haven for smugglers.
We're onto something, Gilbert,
I'm telling you.
So, what does it mean
that Seamus wanted to marry Fiona?
It's Shakespeare.
Two brothers smuggling drugs,
fighting for control of their empire.
Malachy steals Seamus's fiancée,
so Seamus kills both of them.
Okay, but what about Teddy?
Why'd he go missing?
I don't know. He was probably
wanking in the woods for three days.
Teenage boys are gross.
Hmm.
"Smuggler murders family."
That's the story.
Slainte.
- The entire thing will be 100% renewable.
- [sensual music playing]
A vertical farm, 250 well-paying jobs.
You trying to sell this to me?
'Cause I'm convinced.
I'm just excited.
The server farm I'm building now
is just the beginning.
And we can expand into wind farms,
geothermal, housing, infrastructure.
Bodkin 2.0.
Curious much?
[chuckles softly]
These are Teddy's, right?
Yeah.
Are you a fan of his work?
In a way.
He was a friend.
A good friend.
- Was?
- He and I, we, uh had a sort of a rift.
Long time ago.
I'm just trying to help him out.
Why would you do that?
The night he disappeared, I, uh
I was supposed to meet him,
but I ditched him
for the sake of that girl.
[inhales shakily]
He used to be such a smart guy.
Smarter than me.
Funny.
But after he disappeared that Samhain,
he was different.
Quiet.
Dark.
You feel guilty?
I suppose I keep thinking
if I'd met him as planned,
then maybe he'd be okay.
I always struggled to fit in, you know?
I was one of those kids who always
seemed to be the butt of the joke.
Is that why Seamus called you "shitpants"?
[clears throat shakily]
When I was ten,
I shat my pants during a school play.
Been my nickname ever since.
Say what you like about Bodkin,
we're a literal people.
- [chuckles softly]
- [Fintan] But not Teddy.
He was always loyal.
He probably spent the whole night
waiting for me to turn up.
Hey. What would you have done?
[sensual music continues]
All the shit that happened that night
was so long ago.
Can we not let it go and move forward?
Just have a little fuckin' fun?
We can try.
[chuckles softly]
So,
are we doing this?
- Doing what?
- Fun.
- [traditional music continues]
- [Gilbert sings along to melody]
[laughter, whistling]
[patrons whooping, cheering]
[woman] Woo-hoo!
Dove, come dance!
No.
Dancing's a weakness.
Oh, sorry, I forgot
you're far too cool to dance.
Yeah, precisely.
You've read me very well, Gilbert.
You hate everything.
Slainte.
Come on. You must like something.
Wha Tell me one thing you like.
Whiskey.
Whiskey's a thing. It's not a hobby.
Come on.
[splutters] Tell me what you like to do.
Gilbert, what you've just said
is blasphemy.
Whiskey is an Irishman's number one hobby.
[slurring] What do you like to do
when you're you're not working?
I write poetry.
Long romantic epics
filled with lust
and desire and heartbreak.
Bullshit.
I don't know if you've realized this
about me yet, Gilbert,
but I'm kind of an arsehole.
No, I realized it
a long time ago. [laughs]
[both laugh]
- See?
- [mutters]
This version of you,
wild Gilbert, it's way more fun
than that sunshiny Yank I first met.
I guess that's as close to a compliment
as I'm gonna get from you, so boop.
[cheering, clapping]
Think it's time to get outta here!
[slurs] Wait. Get this.
- [muffled music continues]
- [both chuckling]
[both breathe heavily]
Just the fella I was looking for.
- Who's that?
- [Gilbert sighs]
The Yank here owes me money.
[amused scoff] He owes you shit.
He owes me 8,000 fucking euro.
Oh, is that a lot of money to you?
Look here, love
[grunts, groans]
- [Frank snorting, sniffs]
- [Gilbert] Uh
That's my nose, you crazy cunt.
[labored sniffing, grunting]
[Dove] Fuckin' run, Gilbert!
[groans]
- [Gilbert] Dove, wait!
- [Dove] Just keep going!
- [music fading out]
- [Gilbert sighs]
- [Dove laughing hysterically]
- Oh my God.
- Eight thousand euro?
- I know, I know. I can explain.
- [laughing] You fucking idiot.
- I can explain.
[slurring] I know. I know.
It wasn't my finest hour, all right?
- You've only been here for two minutes.
- [Gilbert] Yeah.
It was the first time in the pub, and I
you know, I drank a little bit too much.
And then, I guess I just tried
too hard to ingratiate myself.
You give me so much shit
for bulldozing in.
- Then you go and lose eight grand
- I know, I know.
- to a fucking hippie.
- I know, but Dove
- Dove, I'm in real trouble.
- [Dove catches breath]
All right? I've mortgaged my house.
And I've borrowed money, a ton of money,
just to keep my company going.
Well, Damien says you're the hit-maker.
No, one hit. I had one fucking hit.
- [melancholy ambient music playing]
- [Gilbert sighs]
And for a moment, it was like,
oh, everyone's listening to me, right?
And that's when I started the company,
and I threw every cent that I had in it.
But it's like everything after that
has hit the air
like a fucking lead balloon.
Just pff!
[slurs] It's like
nobody's listening anymore.
[softly] Fuck.
[huffs]
What if I'm a one-hit wonder?
And it's not just not just career.
You know, it's like
everything is falling apart.
Money, debt.
Things with my wife
[softly]are just just not good.
But I can I can fix everything.
All right? I can
I can get back to where I belong.
I just need this one to work.
All right? I I need your help.
I get it.
Everyone's out to get ya.
And you're just trying to do your job.
You're trying to tell the fucking truth.
[slurring] They don't wanna hear it.
They never do.
So you do everything, fuckin'
everything
to get the job done.
[tuts] No matter the consequences.
Are we talking about the same thing?
[melancholy music fades out]
I get it.
- [gulls calling]
- [birds squawking]
Mm. That looks delicious. Thank you.
And what'll you be having this morning?
[wearily] Tea. Just tea.
[Gilbert] Mm!
How can you eat?
I started drinking a glass of water
between every pint of Guinness,
and it really helps.
You should try it.
- [groggily] Hmm.
- So, uh what's our game plan?
Oh. Go back to bed?
Sleep forever?
- We have to go to Darragh's funeral.
- [Dove sighs]
[inhales sharply] I'd like
to dedicate my hangover to Darragh.
He'd want me to go back to bed.
[Gilbert chuckles softly]
No, but Seamus will be there,
and you'll need to talk to him.
Uh
Look, I I like the guy,
but if he really is the Badger,
isn't it dangerous to confront him?
Mm. Seamus is the key.
You want a big podcast,
catching him will deliver that in spades.
[Emmy exhales]
I hope I didn't worry you.
Well, I'm only just in, actually.
You missed a button.
[Emmy] Ugh.
[priest] Because God has chosen
to call our brother Darragh
from this life to himself,
we commit his body to the earth.
For we are dust,
and unto dust we shall return.
But the Lord Jesus Christ
shall change our mortal bodies
to be like himself in glory.
For he is risen,
the firstborn from the dead.
We commend our brother Darragh
to the Lord.
- Go on.
- So the Lord may embrace him in peace.
- And raise his body
- Nothing worthwhile ever came easy.
For our brother Darragh,
let us pray to the Lord Jesus Christ,
who said,
"I am the resurrection and the life."
- "Whoever believes in me shall live"
- Seamus, wait up.
"Whoever lives
and believes shall never die."
- Got a minute?
- For what?
I wondered if you wanted to talk.
Talk?
- You know about Darragh.
- [Seamus scoffs]
[priest] Accept our prayers on behalf
Do you get seasick?
[whimsical music playing]
[priest] So may your mercy
join him to the angels in heaven.
- We ask this to Christ our Lord.
- [all] Amen.
[speaking in Irish]
[indistinct chatter]
[woman, in English] Hello.
I saw you standing here,
and I thought it might be worth seeing
if you had reconsidered your interest
in our worthy cause.
No.
Let's go.
Sorry.
[woman] I know you must think
we're just small-town busybodies,
but our concerns are genuine.
We don't want history to repeat itself.
You might be more interested if you knew
what happened to Seamus that night.
Oh. Sorry.
What do you mean?
The statue of Saint Seamus,
in the grotto on Casement Road.
Christ.
This is important.
At the last Samhain Festival,
a car crashed into poor Saint Seamus
and almost completely destroyed him.
That level of violence
is totally unacceptable.
[Emmy] Did you say car crash
on the Casement Road?
Isn't that
what I've been trying to tell you?
[Emmy] Dove, wait!
[intriguing music playing]
Fintan heard a car crash up there,
and then saw something,
someone walking out of a bog.
Maybe Malachy? Fiona?
[sighs]
Something happened up there that night.
- Where is this road?
- [music fades out]
[Seamus] You know, in Ireland,
it was considered bad luck
for a fisherman to learn how to swim.
That doesn't seem sensible.
Ah, well, it is and it isn't.
Y'know, maybe it seemed wrong
to tempt fate,
or maybe there was no point
fighting the inevitable.
Darragh loved the sea.
Told me once he wanted to be cremated
and his ashes spread to the waves.
He hated the idea
of being trapped in a box.
His sisters buried him anyway.
Mad, isn't it, all the things
you think are so important?
The next thing you know,
you're in a box.
You ever, uh, lose anyone close?
[chuckles]
Haven't we all?
The big thing for me was my wife.
It was cancer.
It was bad.
And then I took the most
intimate and the difficult parts
from the worst time in my married life
and I shared it with the whole world.
Never thought for a second that,
you know, how big it would become.
How public.
People loved it, you know?
True Love.
I mean, everyone except my wife.
She beat the cancer.
Course she did.
But we can't quite seem
to beat what I did.
Well, people do
what they have to do to survive.
Maybe that's all you were doing,
surviving.
I did the opposite.
Tried to bury it, put it in the past.
[somber ambient music playing]
Who, uh
Who was it
that that you lost?
[unsettling music playing]
[smacks lips] Now, you lads seem
awful interested in my past, I notice.
Dove in particular.
You know, it's
That's the way she is with everyone.
I did wonder if
you,
maybe, knew what she was fishing for?
She
She thinks you were
in a relationship with Fiona,
and that Malachy was your brother.
Does she, now?
Do you know what happened to them?
[Seamus scoffs]
I didn't mean to
I know exactly what you meant.
I loved that woman
more than life itself. Huh?
I saw my children in her eyes.
I would have moved heaven
and hell for her.
Malachy [chuckles]
Malachy was my rock.
[sighs softly]
And then, one day, they were just gone.
Gone where?
[scoffs] Sometimes you have to
face the fact that some questions
shouldn't be answered.
So you hold onto
that lovely wife of yours, Gilbert
because there's some things
that are worse than death.
Purgatory's an Irish creation, after all.
[sniffs]
Swim well, friend.
[mysterious music playing]
Look, the Casement Road
just dead-ends into
into a bog?
Zoom in.
What does that look like to you?
A car?
We should call Gilbert.
- [music fades out]
- [flies buzzing]
[Gilbert] Maybe it's just a rock.
Shaped like a car?
Come on.
I don't see anything.
We've got two people who disappeared
and a mysterious car crash
on that same night.
You don't think it's connected?
Maybe. [mutters]
[Dove] One of us is gonna have to go in.
- [flies buzzing]
- [water birds calling]
[frog croaks]
Okay.
[suspenseful music playing]
Dove, it's freezing.
And it's probably nothing.
[Gilbert inhales deeply, sighs]
[Dove softly] Ugh.
[grumbles]
[sighs]
[huffs]
[breathes shakily]
[hums]
- [exhales shakily]
- [muffled metallic clanking]
[gasps]
[muffled metallic clank]
[breathing heavily]
[dramatic music playing]
It's a car.
- Oh my God.
- Right here. I fuckin' knew it.
[tractor engine rumbling]
[water sloshing]
[pulley cranking]
[metallic groan]
[Dove] Did you get anything from Seamus?
Look, he's not who you think he is.
You know, i-if he was the Badger,
he definitely isn't anymore.
He's just just a man.
A really A sad man.
[water sloshing]
[dull metallic groan]
You know, may maybe be this podcast
isn't about all this crime stuff.
You know?
I mean, maybe it's a story about grief,
and a man who's dealing with losing
all the people he cares deepest about.
- Right?
- Wow, yeah. Great hook.
People are really gonna
wanna listen to that.
I think it sounds really interesting.
Ye can't just be goin' around
pulling things out of bogs.
There's official paperwork
needs filling out.
Folks, just stay back
at a safe distance now.
- Get back, lads. Go on home.
- [Cathal] Whose is it?
No, I don't know whose it is. No.
[indistinct muttering]
It's empty.
[Eoin] Right, she's empty.
Nothing to see here.
[splutters] Will you all just
go on home, please?
It was worth a shot.
- I guess.
- [Gilbert] Hmm.
[trunk squeaks]
[ominous music drones]
[haunting music playing]
[Emmy gasps softly]
- Fuck me.
- Oh my God.
[Gilbert] Two bodies locked together
for over 20 years in a bog.
Buried secrets finally coming to life.
It's a storyteller's dream.
And I wish we'd never fucking found them.
- ["H.O.O.D" by Kneecap playing]
- [lyrics in Irish and English]
[music fading out]
Previous EpisodeNext Episode