Cow and Chicken (1997) s03e18 Episode Script
Factory Follies
1
Good morning, staff!
It's me, your boss.
I hope you all slept well last night
and had a yummy breakfast.
'Cause there's no lunch break today!
Back to work you worthless worms.
More pressure!
Come on, ladies!
Put some more muscle into it!
I said red! Not blue!
More disc-shafts, por favor!
More doo-dads!
More steam!
You're fired!
What are you lookin' at?
Get back to work!
Work faster!
Faster!
Faster, faster, faster!
Faster!
Faster!
Faster!
Dang.
Your attention, ladies!
Don't forget the surprise party tonight
for our favorite boss.
Me!
Eight p.m. sharp.
Right here in the conference room.
And don't forget the presents.
Over and out!
A birthday boy add one more year. ♪
Oh, birthday boy with a big fat rear. ♪
Oh! A birthday boy with one more year. ♪
Birthday boy ♪
at one more year-year-year-year-boy. ♪
A birthday birthday ♪
Yeah. ♪
Oh, the guests will be barging
in any second!
Barge on in, guests.
Oh, did I hear something?
Hide! Hide!
Surprise!
Oh, I don't believe it!
Oh, I had no idea!
Happy Birthday, Boss!
For me?
Oh, you shouldn't have.
It's something you've always wanted.
What is it?
A Manure The Bear Doll!
Would you care for a sodie pop?
It's a little early.
Oh, go on, go on, Birthday Boy!
Sodie pop?
Sodie pop?
Diet? Sure!
Why don't I get my camera?
Everybody ready? Say cheese!
What is going on?
Oh birthday boy add one more year! ♪
Oh birthday boy with a big fat rear! ♪
Oh, you shouldn't have.
Yay! Oh, yay!
Oh, birthday boy add one more year! ♪
Oh birthday boy with a big fat rear! ♪
Almost time for work!
Before I go, I would just like to thank
you all!
I don't deserve friends like you!
Bottoms up!
Perhaps I've been wrong all these years
treating my workers like mules.
Maybe I'll turn over a new leaf.
Maybe not!
Get to work, you worthless bunch of slugs!
I would personally like to thank
Cow and Chicken for
giving me the opportunity
for this tour de force, one man show.
Mean it. Thanks!
Ninety-nine, one-hundred.
You know, a lot of people ask me,
"Cow, how do you keep your muzzle
so soft and supple?"
Well, first I slather mayonnaise
all over myself every night
so I will be soft and kinda pinkish.
And it makes my pin hairs stand out.
And pickle slices
are a must for my beauty sleep.
You don't need pants
for the victory dance ♪
'Cause Baboon
better than Weasel ♪
I.R. Baboon, big
star of cartoon ♪
I.M. Weasel.
I.R. Baboon reigns
king in his mind ♪
He's just as good as
the weaselly kind ♪
But round every corner,
he's likely to find ♪
I.M. Weasel.
I.M. Weasel!
I.M. Weasel!
Toe nail, toe nail on my toe,
don't you wish your name was dough?
I.R.'s so exciting!
I.R. getting very first license!
Get off my back, monkey!
Off I get,
if you want, woman big as elephant.
Next.
Are you next?
No. I.R. Baboon.
I.R. here for license, ma'am.
Little squirrel so big as ham.
Well, come along then.
Well, shall we begin, Mr. Baboon?
Show me a stop, please.
Mr. Baboon, before we begin,
What do we always do first?
I.R. knowing that one!
Adjust the mirror,
fasten seat belt, butt warmer on!
Good enough, Mr. Baboon. Let's begin.
Sorry.
- Remember to
- Signaling before turn.
Signals with butt watch for much!
Okay. Signal right.
Signal right takes half a sight.
Signal left with lots of cheek.
Signal right, I.R. no freak.
Watch out!
Dive, dive, easy as pie.
Old lady, old lady, she is not afraidy.
What's the deal with this rhyming monkey?
I.R. rhyming all the timing.
I.R. poet and I.R. know it!
Just be quiet and drive, monkey.
How do we safely deal with a bug
on the windshield, Mr. Baboon?
Good gravy!
I strongly suggest
you get back in the driver's seat.
Oh, no! Oh, no!
Hey!
Mr. Baboon, this is not California.
Moving car, head like jar!
Shut up, ape!
Oranges and flowers, buy some and go.
Oranges and flowers.
Oh, a poem.
"Oranges is orange, flowers is sweet.
I.R. Baboon say you got smelly feet."
Tender.
Orange for you, Mister Poo?
No problem-o!
Lug nut, lug nut, I.R. have big red butt!
Fixing flat is what I do.
Now I done. Your name is Sue.
I.R. thinking never see,
pretty something like a tree.
Love is like road going in two directions.
What they doing?
Bubbly, bubbly on the car,
make it so, I.R., don't say far!
Yeah. My sticky candy stick in teeth
like sticky stuff.
Is it time to think about teeth?
Mr. Baboon!
Oh, my.
Going up like a bee in the sea.
I am sorry, Mr. Baboon. You failed.
You can't qualify
for a driver's license in this state.
You was giving I.R. test for driving license?
I.R. come to get poetic license.
Poetic license?
Weasel, Weasel, burning bright.
Nurse?
Help!
Nurse!
Furry tale and candy eyes,
something something Weasel pies!
Happy to you, I.R. say happy to you.
Okay, you pass!
Here's your license! Just leave me alone!
But I.R. having more! Listen!
Weasel, Weasel, you is small.
You is about one feet tall.
Good morning, staff!
It's me, your boss.
I hope you all slept well last night
and had a yummy breakfast.
'Cause there's no lunch break today!
Back to work you worthless worms.
More pressure!
Come on, ladies!
Put some more muscle into it!
I said red! Not blue!
More disc-shafts, por favor!
More doo-dads!
More steam!
You're fired!
What are you lookin' at?
Get back to work!
Work faster!
Faster!
Faster, faster, faster!
Faster!
Faster!
Faster!
Dang.
Your attention, ladies!
Don't forget the surprise party tonight
for our favorite boss.
Me!
Eight p.m. sharp.
Right here in the conference room.
And don't forget the presents.
Over and out!
A birthday boy add one more year. ♪
Oh, birthday boy with a big fat rear. ♪
Oh! A birthday boy with one more year. ♪
Birthday boy ♪
at one more year-year-year-year-boy. ♪
A birthday birthday ♪
Yeah. ♪
Oh, the guests will be barging
in any second!
Barge on in, guests.
Oh, did I hear something?
Hide! Hide!
Surprise!
Oh, I don't believe it!
Oh, I had no idea!
Happy Birthday, Boss!
For me?
Oh, you shouldn't have.
It's something you've always wanted.
What is it?
A Manure The Bear Doll!
Would you care for a sodie pop?
It's a little early.
Oh, go on, go on, Birthday Boy!
Sodie pop?
Sodie pop?
Diet? Sure!
Why don't I get my camera?
Everybody ready? Say cheese!
What is going on?
Oh birthday boy add one more year! ♪
Oh birthday boy with a big fat rear! ♪
Oh, you shouldn't have.
Yay! Oh, yay!
Oh, birthday boy add one more year! ♪
Oh birthday boy with a big fat rear! ♪
Almost time for work!
Before I go, I would just like to thank
you all!
I don't deserve friends like you!
Bottoms up!
Perhaps I've been wrong all these years
treating my workers like mules.
Maybe I'll turn over a new leaf.
Maybe not!
Get to work, you worthless bunch of slugs!
I would personally like to thank
Cow and Chicken for
giving me the opportunity
for this tour de force, one man show.
Mean it. Thanks!
Ninety-nine, one-hundred.
You know, a lot of people ask me,
"Cow, how do you keep your muzzle
so soft and supple?"
Well, first I slather mayonnaise
all over myself every night
so I will be soft and kinda pinkish.
And it makes my pin hairs stand out.
And pickle slices
are a must for my beauty sleep.
You don't need pants
for the victory dance ♪
'Cause Baboon
better than Weasel ♪
I.R. Baboon, big
star of cartoon ♪
I.M. Weasel.
I.R. Baboon reigns
king in his mind ♪
He's just as good as
the weaselly kind ♪
But round every corner,
he's likely to find ♪
I.M. Weasel.
I.M. Weasel!
I.M. Weasel!
Toe nail, toe nail on my toe,
don't you wish your name was dough?
I.R.'s so exciting!
I.R. getting very first license!
Get off my back, monkey!
Off I get,
if you want, woman big as elephant.
Next.
Are you next?
No. I.R. Baboon.
I.R. here for license, ma'am.
Little squirrel so big as ham.
Well, come along then.
Well, shall we begin, Mr. Baboon?
Show me a stop, please.
Mr. Baboon, before we begin,
What do we always do first?
I.R. knowing that one!
Adjust the mirror,
fasten seat belt, butt warmer on!
Good enough, Mr. Baboon. Let's begin.
Sorry.
- Remember to
- Signaling before turn.
Signals with butt watch for much!
Okay. Signal right.
Signal right takes half a sight.
Signal left with lots of cheek.
Signal right, I.R. no freak.
Watch out!
Dive, dive, easy as pie.
Old lady, old lady, she is not afraidy.
What's the deal with this rhyming monkey?
I.R. rhyming all the timing.
I.R. poet and I.R. know it!
Just be quiet and drive, monkey.
How do we safely deal with a bug
on the windshield, Mr. Baboon?
Good gravy!
I strongly suggest
you get back in the driver's seat.
Oh, no! Oh, no!
Hey!
Mr. Baboon, this is not California.
Moving car, head like jar!
Shut up, ape!
Oranges and flowers, buy some and go.
Oranges and flowers.
Oh, a poem.
"Oranges is orange, flowers is sweet.
I.R. Baboon say you got smelly feet."
Tender.
Orange for you, Mister Poo?
No problem-o!
Lug nut, lug nut, I.R. have big red butt!
Fixing flat is what I do.
Now I done. Your name is Sue.
I.R. thinking never see,
pretty something like a tree.
Love is like road going in two directions.
What they doing?
Bubbly, bubbly on the car,
make it so, I.R., don't say far!
Yeah. My sticky candy stick in teeth
like sticky stuff.
Is it time to think about teeth?
Mr. Baboon!
Oh, my.
Going up like a bee in the sea.
I am sorry, Mr. Baboon. You failed.
You can't qualify
for a driver's license in this state.
You was giving I.R. test for driving license?
I.R. come to get poetic license.
Poetic license?
Weasel, Weasel, burning bright.
Nurse?
Help!
Nurse!
Furry tale and candy eyes,
something something Weasel pies!
Happy to you, I.R. say happy to you.
Okay, you pass!
Here's your license! Just leave me alone!
But I.R. having more! Listen!
Weasel, Weasel, you is small.
You is about one feet tall.