Cow and Chicken (1997) s04e25 Episode Script
The Cow and Chicken Blues
1
Mama had a chicken. ♪
Mama had a cow. ♪
Dad was proud, he didn't care how. ♪
Cow! ♪
Chicken! ♪
Cow and Chicken! ♪
I'm so bored!
There ain't nothing to do
around here no more.
Ever since cousin Boneless Chicken
broke the TV set.
Hey, kids! Why the long faces?
Looks like our kids
got a bad case of the blues, Dad.
The Blues?
Yeah! What you two need is
to visit our neighbor,
Blind Mud Puddle Johnson:
The King of the Blues!
He lives right next door on the bayou.
How come we never knew about
no bayou next door before?
There's a lot you don't know!
That's why you go to school!
Well, I still got the blues.
Yeah. Me, too.
I guess we'd better go see
this Mud Hole guy.
All righty! Let's go whip these blues!
Holy cow!
He's gone. Stupid old alligator.
Help, Cow! He's gonna eat me!
Hey, Cow!
Quit standing there like an imbecile
and let's find that old Mud guy!
Pleased to meet ya, Turkey.
I'm Chicken.
Your secret's safe with me.
I'd love to stay and chat,
but we're looking for
Blind Mud Puddle Johnson.
Well, I'm Blind Mud Puddle Johnson.
Hey. You're not Blind.
No. But it sounded better than
"Stigmatism Mud Puddle"
Or "Slightly Myopic Mud Puddle Johnson."
Don't you think?
So what can I do ya for?
We got the blues.
Well, sit your butts right down.
I got a cure for the blues.
Now, zip your pie holes
and I'll learn you something or two.
Whenever I get the blues,
I always think about this
Red Pantsless Gator Man
used to live around these pans.
Pantsless?
From the day he was born.
A ding dang dong, ♪
listen to my song ♪
about a guy named Lance ♪
and the gator that got his pants. ♪
A greater guy you'll never meet, ♪
with a big old butt and little tiny feet. ♪
Lance Sackless was his name. ♪
And trapping alligators was his game. ♪
Gator man, he had no fear. ♪
And pants he wore to hide his rear. ♪
Here, Gator! Oh, yoo-hoo!
Talented Gator Trapper, here!
Lance laid the bait so carefully, ♪
then hid in the weeds heroically. ♪
I'm hurt!
My butt! I'm hurt worse!
Yes, this gator man was brave and strong, ♪
and handsome as the day was long. ♪
And then one day it was night and late, ♪
and the gator man he had no bait. ♪
I'm out of bait!
The great gator man's only chance ♪
was to use as bait his beloved pants. ♪
What can I say?
Brains was not this boy's strong suit.
The genius traper awaited so brave, ♪
when a giant gator came, ♪
his name was Dave. ♪
He was the biggest alligator, ♪
I tell ya gents, ♪
but a gator with a fashion sense. ♪
These are just too darling!
I'm so fetching!
Oh, I'm caught!
So, Handsome Lance Sackless
became the biggest hero
in the history of the world,
with parades and floodlights and
Hey, wait a minute.
This is getting weird.
That don't sound like
no proper blues to me.
Yes. I still have the blues something awful.
Hello! It's me! Did you like my song?
Hey, you're no Blues guy!
No. I'm a Red Guy. Is that a crime?
Where is the real
Blind Mud Puddle Johnson?
Wait.
Thank you, Cow and Chicken.
Don't be messing
with old Mud Puddle, Mister.
Shut up and listen to some real blues.
There once was this fat guy. ♪
Name of Lance. ♪
An ugly dude. ♪
He wore no pants. ♪
Then the gator came ♪
up out of the swamp ♪
and bit old Lance in the butt with a chomp. ♪
So off he run ♪
like a frightened hairless bunny, ♪
with the gator on his tail ♪
about to eat the pantless dummy. ♪
Then he chewed up the dude ♪
with the bottom so bad ♪
then hawked poor Lance ♪
up into the air. ♪
So I tell you now that it ain't no dirty lie. ♪
That was the end of the pantless ♪
I said pantless, ♪
dirty, low-down, shiny hiney red ♪
guy! ♪
So, what y'all think?
We all think we all gotta be
getting home now, Mud.
Well, come back anytime now, ya hear?
Yeah.
Them's right nice kids.
Remind me to stay on the good side
of Mud Puddle Johnson.
You can say that again!
That was the end! ♪
Go home. ♪
Mama had a chicken. ♪
Mama had a cow. ♪
Dad was proud, he didn't care how. ♪
Cow! ♪
Chicken! ♪
Cow and Chicken! ♪
I'm so bored!
There ain't nothing to do
around here no more.
Ever since cousin Boneless Chicken
broke the TV set.
Hey, kids! Why the long faces?
Looks like our kids
got a bad case of the blues, Dad.
The Blues?
Yeah! What you two need is
to visit our neighbor,
Blind Mud Puddle Johnson:
The King of the Blues!
He lives right next door on the bayou.
How come we never knew about
no bayou next door before?
There's a lot you don't know!
That's why you go to school!
Well, I still got the blues.
Yeah. Me, too.
I guess we'd better go see
this Mud Hole guy.
All righty! Let's go whip these blues!
Holy cow!
He's gone. Stupid old alligator.
Help, Cow! He's gonna eat me!
Hey, Cow!
Quit standing there like an imbecile
and let's find that old Mud guy!
Pleased to meet ya, Turkey.
I'm Chicken.
Your secret's safe with me.
I'd love to stay and chat,
but we're looking for
Blind Mud Puddle Johnson.
Well, I'm Blind Mud Puddle Johnson.
Hey. You're not Blind.
No. But it sounded better than
"Stigmatism Mud Puddle"
Or "Slightly Myopic Mud Puddle Johnson."
Don't you think?
So what can I do ya for?
We got the blues.
Well, sit your butts right down.
I got a cure for the blues.
Now, zip your pie holes
and I'll learn you something or two.
Whenever I get the blues,
I always think about this
Red Pantsless Gator Man
used to live around these pans.
Pantsless?
From the day he was born.
A ding dang dong, ♪
listen to my song ♪
about a guy named Lance ♪
and the gator that got his pants. ♪
A greater guy you'll never meet, ♪
with a big old butt and little tiny feet. ♪
Lance Sackless was his name. ♪
And trapping alligators was his game. ♪
Gator man, he had no fear. ♪
And pants he wore to hide his rear. ♪
Here, Gator! Oh, yoo-hoo!
Talented Gator Trapper, here!
Lance laid the bait so carefully, ♪
then hid in the weeds heroically. ♪
I'm hurt!
My butt! I'm hurt worse!
Yes, this gator man was brave and strong, ♪
and handsome as the day was long. ♪
And then one day it was night and late, ♪
and the gator man he had no bait. ♪
I'm out of bait!
The great gator man's only chance ♪
was to use as bait his beloved pants. ♪
What can I say?
Brains was not this boy's strong suit.
The genius traper awaited so brave, ♪
when a giant gator came, ♪
his name was Dave. ♪
He was the biggest alligator, ♪
I tell ya gents, ♪
but a gator with a fashion sense. ♪
These are just too darling!
I'm so fetching!
Oh, I'm caught!
So, Handsome Lance Sackless
became the biggest hero
in the history of the world,
with parades and floodlights and
Hey, wait a minute.
This is getting weird.
That don't sound like
no proper blues to me.
Yes. I still have the blues something awful.
Hello! It's me! Did you like my song?
Hey, you're no Blues guy!
No. I'm a Red Guy. Is that a crime?
Where is the real
Blind Mud Puddle Johnson?
Wait.
Thank you, Cow and Chicken.
Don't be messing
with old Mud Puddle, Mister.
Shut up and listen to some real blues.
There once was this fat guy. ♪
Name of Lance. ♪
An ugly dude. ♪
He wore no pants. ♪
Then the gator came ♪
up out of the swamp ♪
and bit old Lance in the butt with a chomp. ♪
So off he run ♪
like a frightened hairless bunny, ♪
with the gator on his tail ♪
about to eat the pantless dummy. ♪
Then he chewed up the dude ♪
with the bottom so bad ♪
then hawked poor Lance ♪
up into the air. ♪
So I tell you now that it ain't no dirty lie. ♪
That was the end of the pantless ♪
I said pantless, ♪
dirty, low-down, shiny hiney red ♪
guy! ♪
So, what y'all think?
We all think we all gotta be
getting home now, Mud.
Well, come back anytime now, ya hear?
Yeah.
Them's right nice kids.
Remind me to stay on the good side
of Mud Puddle Johnson.
You can say that again!
That was the end! ♪
Go home. ♪