DuckTales (2017) s02e07 Episode Script

What Ever Happened to Della Duck?!

1 [LIGHTNING ZAPS] [THUNDER] [GRUNT] Mayday! Mayday! Does anybody read me?! [STATIC] Stupid, no good - Della! - Uncle Scrooge! Turn back! It's too dangerous! The Cosmic Storm's coming at ya! - Della! - [STATIC] [THUNDER] [STRAINING] Aah! - Ohh! Oh! - [CRASH] [GROANING] Oh, no! Oh, no no no! No no no no! [COUGHING] [GASPING FOR AIR] Yes! Oxy-Chew! [GRUNTING] [GASP] Unhh! Ugh! Uch! Black licorice? [GRUNTING] [GRUNTING] Aaah! Unh! [THUD] [METAL CREAKING] [THUD] Aw, phooey.
[CHEWING] I'm coming, boys.
[STATIC] Yes! Ha ha! It works! Whoo! Take that, science! Okay, hey, Uncle Scrooge.
Or Donald.
Or literally anybody who can hear me.
This is Della Duck! [SWITCH CLICKS] - [CLICK] - Meh! Right, so here's what's up: the freak cosmic storm knocked out most of my systems.
But because I am an amazing pilot, I landed the ship safely.
For the most part.
[THUD] Eh? Ehhhh?! [ROBOTIC WHIRRING] Pretty cool robot leg.
I'm still working on it.
Maybe add some jets or a can opener? Anyway I've been able to survive in the thin lunar atmosphere thanks to Gyro's Oxy-Chew.
It provides oxygen, water, and nutrition.
And tastes terrible.
Black licorice.
Worst flavor ever.
It's fine.
I'm sure the flavor will wear off soon.
[CLANK] I've activated my distress beacon, so if you're getting these transmissions, you'll be able to pinpoint my location and come get me.
[SIGHS] I've made efforts to get off this rock myself.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING] [HUMMING "MOON THEME" FROM THE DUCKTALES NES VIDEO GAME] [CONTINUING] Na na naaa Na nnaaa Aaah! It did not go great.
In the meantime, I've put together a pretty boss shelter.
Got a nice comfy bed.
A calendar marking the days I've been here.
And the, uh family room.
Bet the boys have hatched by now.
Not even sure what they look like.
Ooh! Uh, hold on.
Here we go! That's better! Donald, if you're there, put the screen up to the crib.
Hey, kids! I'm your mom! I know I'm on a little trip, for now, but I'll keep sending these transmissions.
You'll barely know I'm gone! I promise I'm coming home, somehow.
Nothing can stop Della Duck! Oh, man, we're gonna go on so many amazing adventures when I get back.
In fact, there's this old song about adventure - that I used to sing to - [CRASH] - [SCREECHING] - Ohhh! Unh! Aah! What are you?! Aah! Its face has tentacles! [STATIC] [PANTING] Good news: I'm not alone.
Bad news: There's a horrifying bug monster out there trying to eat me.
Important life lesson on bug monsters, kids: you're gonna be worried about the pincers, but, remember, their spit is corrosive, too.
Hmm.
[CHEWS] That's Day 192.
The gum has not yet lost its flavor.
[SIGHS] - [STATIC] - Soooo it's been a few months.
I haven't heard back from anyone.
[TAPPING] I need to find some other way to call for help.
Luckily, I found this in the wreckage! My old Junior Woodchuck Guidebook! "How to survive a shipwreck.
Create a signal for passing ships.
" Rocket ships.
Mmm! [GRUNTING] There! [GRUNTING] "Hey, Scrooge, it's me, Della.
I'm alive on the moon.
Send help.
And snacks.
This gum is the worst.
Sincerely, Della.
" Perfect! - [RUMBLING] - [GASP] [GROWLING] Oh, no! Unh! [GASP] [SCREECH] Well, that was unnecessary.
[SIGHS] Oh! Not enough scraps for a full "S.
O.
S.
" Need something that will get Scrooge's attention.
Nailed it! Happy birthday to you! Happy Birthday to my boys! Happy birthday to you! [BLOWS] [BLOWS HARDER] Oh.
Uhh uhh uhh.
I'm sorry I can't be there for your first birthday, but I am trying.
[CRASH] Do not mess with me today, Moon Mite! [GROWLING] - [ROCKET ENGINE] - [GASP] Forget cake! Guess what you're getting for your birthday? Your mom! Hey! Get away from there! Let's make a deal You leave my S.
O.
S.
alone for, like, ten seconds, and once I'm off this stupid rock, you can eat my whole dang ship! Eh? Ehhh?! [DELLA GRUNTING] - [GROWLS] - Ohhh! Aah! Ahh! Let! It! Goooo! Oof! [GROANING] [GASP] [MOON MITE SCREECHES] This is Space Eagle to McDuck HQ.
Looks like some kind of meteor strike on the surface.
There are no visible signs of life.
[GROANS] - Aah! - [SCREECHES] Unh! No! Wait! Come back! Unh! [SNIFFLING] [CHEWS] [SIGHS] Okay.
New plan.
[STATIC] Plan C: I'm gonna rebuild the Spear of Selene! I mean, how hard can it be? It's just rocket science.
Oh, boy.
Focus, Della! Like Donald always says, do things by the book.
[GROWLING] Aah! Aaaaaah! Puh! Puh! Good thing Donald's not here.
["MOON THEME" PLAYING] Whoa! Oh! Ohhh! Uhhhhh! [GRUNTING] Ah! [WHIRRING] Ta-da! [HUMMING] Okay, it took [MUMBLES] a while, but I finally did it.
I rebuilt the Spear of Selene! Best mother ev-er! [CRACKING] All right, I just gotta start this baby up, and I'm on my way home! [POWERING UP] - [ALARM BEEPING] - [SHIP POWERS DOWN] Aaah! Unh! [MUTTERING] Come on! "Starting the engine: turn key.
" Yeah.
No duh, book! Rrrrr! It wasn't enough that Gyro created the most disgusting flavor of gum that somehow gets more flavorful as you chew it, but then he had to use his stupid Gold Tech to make the engine run! How am I gonna find stinkin' gold on the stinkin' moon?! Unh! Okay, I spent 20 years with the best treasure hunter in the world.
If there's gold on this rock, I'm gonna find it.
Hup! Ah! Hup! - [CLANK] - Hup! Hup! Hup! Welp, there's no gold on the moon.
[SCOTTISH ACCENT] "Tear me tartan, I'm the richest duck in the world, but I couldn't possibly spare any back-up gold, even though the engine runs on it.
" Life lesson, kids: adventuring is tough.
- [HINGE SQUEAKING] - Ya know, sometimes there's a cursed idol that turns into a demon.
Or sometimes you crash land on the moon and try to stay alive, but a Moon Mite messes everything up, keeping you here while your kids grow up with their uncles.
But you still got your health, a cool robot leg, and gum that mocks you with every chew! [CHOMP] Ow! A gold filling?! Ah! Ha ha ha! I had gold in my mouth this whole time! I had gold in my mouth this whole time?! That's why Scrooge made me go to the dentist as a kid.
It wasn't about hygiene at all! I've got back-up gold! Nothing can stop me now! [CRASH] [GASP] No-no-no-no! Not this time! [SCREECHING] Huh? Aah! Unh! Unh! [SCREECH] [SHIP CREAKING] Aaah! [HISSING] Ha ha! Aah! Aah! Oh! - Aah! Ohh! - [SCREECHING] - [LASER BLASTS] - [HOWLING] Huh? Halt in name of the Moon! Wait, what? Who? What?! [RUMBLING] Oh, no, you don't! Don't ignore me when I threaten your life! Respect my dominance! [PANTING] Who are you and how did you get here?! Hi! Della Duck.
I have, like, 13 million questions! But right now, I have to get my ship and get back to Earth! [LUNARIS] Stand down, Lieutenant Penumbra.
Greetings, Earther.
I am General Lunaris of the Planet Moon.
What? The moon's not a planet.
You will treat the vastly superior Moon with respect, or you will suffer the ultimate consequence.
Look, I'll suffer whatever consequences you want after I find the mite.
Uh, ha.
The courageous warriors of the Planet Moon have been hunting the beast for more than three cycles.
So how exactly is a pathetic Earth-dwelling dummy going to find it? [RUMBLING] [ALL SCREAM] Unh! [GRUNTING] Unh! [HEAVY FOOTSTEPS] [SCREECH] Ohh! Hey, I found the mite! [SCREECHING] Open fire, Lieutenant Penumbra! - [SCREECH] - Oh! Quick! Feed the Earther to the beast! While it's crushing her weak bones, we kill it! Listen, we both know how this goes: first we hate each other, then go on a life-changing adventure, then - Boom! - [SCREECH] Best friends! So can we move this along, Penny? [SCREECHING] My name is Lieutenant Penumbra! [HISSING] [GASP] Huh! [SCREECHING] Aaaaah! Uhhh! Aaaaah! Stop firing, Lieutenant.
You'll hit Della.
You won't stop me from getting home to my kids, ya creepy-crawly crook! Rraah! [SCREECH] I will not fail them again! Aaah! [GRUNTING] [SCREECHING] [MITE SCREECHING] Yah! [SCREECHING] Aaaah! [CREATURE CRIES] [CRIES ECHOING] [CRYING] [CRYING] [SOBBING] Wait.
The mite isn't a monster.
It's a mother! Who cares? The mite isn't our enemy.
It's just trying to survive.
She put herself in danger, faced unknown threats, scoured this entire planet for any scrap of metal.
Because a mother would do anything for the sake of her kids.
Ah mmph! [CRYING] [GROWLING] [BABY MITE CRYING] [BOTH GASP] Let me try something.
I used to sing this old song to my boys before they hatched.
[CRYING] [SIGHS] Look to the stars, my darling baby boys Life is strange and vast Filled with wonders and joys Face each new sun With eyes clear and true Unafraid of the unknown Because I'll face it all with you Quick, give me your guns.
Ooh, good plan.
Lull the beasts into a false sense of security only to betray them when they're at their most vulnerable! Huh, maybe we are becoming best friends.
Boo! You disappoint me in every way possible! [CHIRPING] We fought the mites for cycles, and you turned them back, not through battle, but compassion.
If we simply share the gold, we will no longer be at war with the beasts.
You have done the Planet Moon a great service today, Della Duck.
[SIGHS] There's no way I can fix this.
Sorry, boys.
I tried.
You might not be able to go home, but that doesn't mean you can't make a new one, with us.
[LUNARIS] For too long, the mites have been attacking our home, but my people will hide in fear no more.
Neat house.
Huh.
Where I'm from, we call this a "rock.
" General, am I allowed to disintegrate her yet? [CHUCKLES] [GASP] Wha?! Welcome to Tranquility.
Wait.
This whole time there's been a city here?! And I've been slumming it in the moon desert?! I told you you were a dummy.
And you guys had food, and weapons and [GASP] gold! [CHUCKLES] It's our most plentiful resource.
We use it for everything.
Sometimes we just throw it in the trash, which is also made of gold.
Wow.
That is incredibly infuriating, but amazing! Ha ha ha ha! I can fix my ship! Your attempts to wrestle me to the ground are pathetic! See? Best friends! [LAUGHING AND WHOOPING] I can't believe you're just going to let that Moon-hater run free.
You've gone Earth soft.
That Earth-dweller managed to defeat our greatest enemy like it was nothing.
She could be useful.
Or dangerous.
[PENUMBRA] Watch your back, Earther.