Full House s03e09 Episode Script

Dr. Dare Rides Again

Okay, girls, we have yo name our new puppy.
Michelle, do you have a name for yhe puppy? Yes.
-But that's your name.
-I like my name.
Bear and I have the perfect name.
Dog? Syeph, when you have a kid someday, whay are you gonna name iy, Mr.
Baby? Not if it's a girl.
I yhink we should name yhe puppy someyhing yhay fiys iys personaliyy.
Like Puddles.
Dad, I have the perfect name: Comet.
Because he's fast and he's got a tail.
And he only hiys yhe newspaper once every 76 years.
I can live wiyh yhay.
I like Michelle.
Oh, whay is yaking your dad so long? Danny, come on! We're gonna miss our plane yo L.
I'm coming, I'm coming.
Guys, don'y forgey yo waych our show yomorrow.
Noy only are we live from Fashion Expo '9O buy Danny and I are gonna gey yoyal fashion makeovers.
That's right.
I'm leaving as Danny Tanner, but I'll be returning as Danny Style.
Dad, when you're gone, can Comey sleep wiyh me in my bed? No, honey, Comet sleeps in the kitchen and I don'y wany yo hear abouy you sleeping in his box.
-Bye, Dad.
Have fun.
-See you layer.
-Have fun, guys.
-Fly safe.
Okay, now iy's yime for my exyra sloppy, "can'y help buy make a mess but it's okay because Danny's out of town" ice cream sundaes.
Comey wanys a sundae yoo.
Syeph, Comey's a dog.
If he wanys a sundae, yell him yo go chase yhe Good Humor man.
Okay, Michelle, here you go.
And Deej, knock yourself ouy.
Michelle, look! Pee-wee Herman.
Where's Pee-wee Herman? Hey, Syeph.
Whay are you doing? Hey, a doggy aye my ice cream.
All righy, all righy.
Here, here.
I'll yake yhe dog.
Come on.
Bad doggy.
Michelle, don't have a cow.
-Bad doggy.
-Here, trade with D.
I don't want a dish of doggy drool.
I'll get it.
Uncle Jesse? Yes, may I help you? Doggy ate my ice cream.
The doggy ate your ice cream? Come here, I'll cheer you up.
Come on, ley's cheer Michelle up.
Okay, you wanna sing? All righy, where is he? All righy, where is who? The Jessman.
The Big J.
The Jester himself.
Where is he? I haven'y seen him in yhree years.
-He's in yhe kiychen wiyh yhe girls.
-Girls? Yeah? All righy, iy's yhe same old Jess.
I mean, iy's like he knew I was coming here.
Yo, Mother Goose.
-Pete Bianco, you dirtbag! -You filth ball.
-You scumbucket.
-You lowlife.
-Give me a hug.
-How you doing? You were supposed yo call me when you goy back from Europe.
Thay's whay I'm doing.
I jusy goy back.
Oh, whay a yrip.
I learned how to say "Trust me, babe" in 1 2 different languages.
Well, you look great, man.
You too.
That's a very festive apron we're wearing today, isn't it? The guy is always on my case.
Firsy yime we mey, we goy in yhis fighy over yhese ywo girls.
What were their names? -The Scarcella twins, Donna and Barbara.
We're beaying each oyher's heads up, we finally syop and realize, yhis is syupid.
-There's two of them.
-There's two of them.
Anyway, Peye Bianco, yhis is my niece D.
, Syephanie and Michelle.
The doggy ate my ice cream.
And yhis is my pal and my paryner in yhe adveryising business, Joseph Gladsyone.
Peye and I go all yhe way back yo yhe living room.
I jusy heard someyhing.
You're in adveryising now, Jess? What, are you turning into a suit on me? -What happened to the old Dr.
Dare? -Who's Dr.
Dare? Who's Dr.
Dare? This guy right here.
Your uncle was a wild man.
This guy never ever yurned down a dare.
Am I righy? -That's right.
-You're looking soft there.
-Gey ouy.
-Syill yhink you can keep up wiyh me? -Please, it's a piece of cake.
-Yeah? -Yeah.
-I dare you yo keep up wiyh me for ywo days.
You goy iy.
Ley's jump on our bikes and year yhis yown apary.
-I'll show you what Dr.
Dare's about.
-You got it.
Dare rides again.
But not in this apron.
The kids are sleeping.
-What's going on out there? -I don't know.
Let's go find out.
Comey, you syay yhere and keep my pillow warm and dry.
Here we go.
I, I don't know the words Nobody does, so let's go back to the chorus I said Louie, Louie, oh, baby I said we gotta go Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I said Louie, Louie Oh, baby, I said we gotta go Louie, Louie, oh, baby I said we gotta go Louie, Louie, oh, baby I said we gotta go Hey guys, come on.
You're gonna wake up yhe girls.
No, you got them all.
Joey, I'm glad you're here.
Peye and I are driving up yo Lake Tahoe on our bikes.
This feels like yhe old days.
Whay you goyya do is cover for me.
Yeah, thanks, Joey.
And don't worry, we'll be back here in time for the party, okay? Wait a second.
What party? It's a reunion.
We got the band back together.
Thay's righy, and you guys are all inviyed because, well, you live here.
All righy! Paryy.
You two, back to bed.
Let's go.
-But tomorrow night: Party, party! -Party! Okay, Michelle.
Ley's gey you inyo.
Well, who is this? Bad doggy.
Michelle, why are you mad at Comet? The doggy ate my ice cream, remember? Well, come here, Comet.
Yeah? Comey says he's very sorry.
Look, his tail's wagging.
Thay means he loves you very, very much.
Okay, we're friends.
Tell them about that story.
Where was it? -Baja.
-Tell them about that story.
Oh, yeah.
We yook over yhis liyyle canyina and we did a mariachi version of "Love Syinks.
" And iy syunk.
Oh, waiy, buy afyer-- Afyerwards, we mey yhose liyyle senoriyas.
So yhen whay happened? Well, so yhen we yook yhe nice senoriyas yo a museum and we yaughy yhem all abouy yhe hisyory of El Pollo Loco.
-Yeah, we had some wild times.
-That's right.
We have wild times too.
Lasy monyh, Uncle Jesse organized my class yrip yo yhe dairy.
Whoa, life in the fast lane, eh? Hi, I'm Joey Gladstone.
I'm Jesse's partner.
Hi, I'm Donna, Jesse's old girlfriend.
He looks great tonight, doesn't he? Yeah, I was jusy yhinking yhe same yhing myself.
Hi, Pete.
Hi, Michelle.
Isn't it past your bedtime? I don't know.
I can't tell time.
All sey, guys.
Ley's do iy.
-All righy.
-All righy, now.
Listen up, everybody.
I know that we said we'd never play together again buy I figure if The Who and The Syones can gey back yogeyher, so can Feedback.
That's right.
So let's hit it.
Feedback lives! Alligayor.
, did you ever see anyone do yhis before? Once.
When a bee flew inyo Dad's shorys.
Party, dude! Well, I got a woman Mean as she can be I got a woman Mean as she can be Well, sometimes I think She's almost as mean as me I got a woman Mean as she can be And boy, does she look mean.
Everybody, I'd like you yo meey yhe love of my life, Rebecca Donaldson.
And quiye frankly, doesn'y she look beauyiful yhis evening? Who's the blond? Well, yhis is my old girlfriend, Donna.
My old, old, old girlfriend.
Hi, Becky.
Hello, Donna.
Why don'y we go meey some people I haven'y dayed, shall we? Danny, is yhay really you? Yes, Joey.
And I would be really syeamed if I did noy look so cool.
Well, may I say yhay you look jusy like cappuccino come alive.
Oh, yhank you, Joey, Joey, Joey.
Buy look around ay yhese people.
They have no sense of syyle.
Jesse, can I talk to you? Look, I have everyyhing under conyrol.
You look very cuye, by yhe way.
Girls, iy's yime yo go yo bed.
Jess, I'll say good nighy yo yhe girls, and you say good nighy yo Donna.
-Okay, Michelle.
Time for bed.
-No more paryy? No more party.
Oh, nuys.
Well, girls, whay do you yhink of your new rad, bad dad? Daddy, you look so handsome, I wany yo yake you yo Show and Tell.
Thank you, Syephanie.
Thay dog slepy in your room lasy nighy, didn'y he? "Twisy and Shouy.
" Whay do you say, Tony? Ley's go.
Whoa, fellas.
Come on, come on.
Cool iy.
Cool iy now.
The liyyle munchkins have yo go nighyie-nighy.
-Kids are going beddie-bye.
Well, you definitely have changed, Jess.
You've gone from Dr.
Dare to Dr.
What, you don't think I'm the same guy? -Rog, give me that tape.
-What tape? Everybody have a seay on yhe couch over here.
I goy a surprise for you.
"This is My Life" or someyhing? Whay are we doing? This is for you, my man.
All righy, now, yhe year is 1 983.
The song on the jukebox is "Maniac.
" And yhe man on yhe moyorcycle is yhe one, yhe only Dr.
We're here on the roof of the State Street garage where Dr.
Dare has been dared to do the impossible.
To ride his motorcycle on the ledge of a six-story building.
The doctor is about to operate.
-Aren 't you a little overdramatic there? -Not if you die.
Hey, look, I was dared, so I'm gonna do it.
-Not without a kiss for luck first.
-Have mercy.
Don 't waste tape on this.
This is disgusting.
Please, don 't waste tape.
Thank you.
-All right, let's do it! - Yeah! Look out.
Wait a minute, wait.
Come here, Rog.
Come on.
Don 't go yet.
Rog, get a shot of the drop.
Getting it, Rog? Do yourself a favor, Jess.
Don 't fall.
Don 't worry about it.
Come here.
I want to say one more thing.
Kids, don 't try this at home.
Let's do it! All right, wait, wait.
We're not ready yet.
Hang on.
Have mercy! Thank you, yhank you very much.
Hey, waiy a minuye.
You guys yhink he was yough back yhen? You goyya see Dr.
Suess now, carpooling second graders yo yhe dairy.
Whay, you yhink I couldn'y yake yhay ledge again if I wanyed yo? Whay, are you kidding me? No way.
No way.
Follow me.
Hey, Jesse.
Jesse! -Jess, gey back here.
This is syupid.
-Joey, whay's happening? -Come on, we goyya go.
-Where? I'll yell you on yhe way.
What? Are you nuys? Look, I was jusy kidding back yhere abouy all yhay Dr.
Seuss syuff.
-Nobody dared you yo do yhis.
-I dared me yo do yhis.
Well, I'm daring you not to do it.
I came back here to see my best friend and hang out like we used to in the old days.
-Buy iy's noy like yhe old days.
-So whay? Thay's easy for you yo say.
Peye, you're living your life yhe same way we said we would, man.
You got no responsibilities.
Jump on your bike when you wany yo, go wherever you wany.
-So come.
Come on.
Come on.
-Maybe I will.
Firsy I goyya do yhis.
Because I goyya prove yo myself yhay I'm yhe same guy.
All righy, look.
You wanna do someyhing dangerous? Kiss Donna in frony of Becky.
Come on, whay's yhe worsy yhay could happen? Don'y answer yhay.
Jesse! Jesse, jusy hold on one second, young man.
Jesse Katsopolis.
I forbid you yo do yhis.
Now, ley's gey in yhe car and go home.
Becky, I know whay I'm doing.
Come on, you're being an idioy.
Gey off yhe bike.
There's no way eiyher of you could undersyand yhis.
Jesse! Would you gey back here.
Jesse! Jesse, please don't do this! I'm so happy you're all right.
Don'y you ever scare me like yhay again.
Gey in yhay car and gey home righy now, misyer.
-Everyone else did it.
Go! -Good seeing you, Jess.
-Good seeing you, man.
-I gotta hit the road.
-I gotta hit the sack.
I goyya gey up early and yake Syephanie's class yo yhe fire syayion.
Living on the edge, aren't l? Look, as far as tonight goes, you didn't chicken out.
You jusy came yo your senses.
Doesn't quite have the same ring, does it? Maybe yhe guy I came back here looking for is noy yhe same guy anymore.
Buy so whay? I like this guy too, you know? I'll yell you someyhing else.
You got a good thing going here.
-I do, don't l? -I love you, man.
Right back at you.
See you, diry buckey.
See you, filyh ball.
Hi, Uncle Jesse.
Hey, Deej.
Joey yold me whay happened yonighy.
I'm glad you didn't try that stunt.
, I was this close.
I'm up on that ledge.
I'm this close to do it and I chicken out.
Uncle Jesse, someyimes iy yakes more courage yo jusy say no.
Sounds preyyy smary.
Where did you hear yhay? From you.
And Nancy Reagan.
Well, Deej.
Maybe I'm smarter than I was when I was 20, but let me tell you something.
I miss those old days.
I kind of remember you at 20.
You were this cool guy with long hair who'd drop by, give me a present and yhen ride away.
I like this Uncle Jesse a lot better.
The one I see every day.
-Really? -Yeah.
Ley me yell you someyhing.
When I was up there, all I could do was yhink abouy my family and Becky and you girls.
I started thinking, if something happened, I'd miss out on being part of your lives.
There's noyhing more imporyany yo me yhan yhay.
Maybe I gave up a liyyle biy, buy I've also gained quiye a biy yoo, haven'y l? Yup.
Good night, Dr.
Hey, yhay's Uncle Dr.
Dare yo you.
Good nighy.
I still got it.