Gintama (2005) s01e36 Episode Script

People with Dark Pasts Can't Shut Up

I kind of don't like the fact that the day is over just as the sun is rising.
That's the life of a hostess, but it's not healthy.
Really? I think it's pretty good.
While's the sun's down we become the suns that light up the night.
Besides, a Bäagen-Dash after work tastes so good.
Otae, you're lucky you're so relaxed.
I can't take it anymore.
Today some ronin named Sakamoto was touching my butt.
Honestly.
Get used to it, Oroyo-chan.
I told you to break their fingers when they do that.
Is that what you do?! You're no sun! You're a black hole!! If only Hanako, the new girl, was as tough as you.
She took off from work today, too, didn't she? I wonder what's wrong.
Who knows? It's not all that unusual.
It's hard work.
Huh? Isn't that Hanako? I wonder what she's doing there Hey!! What are you doing? D-Don't come any closer! Hanako-chan You I was wondering what you were doing when you took off from work If you want to catch crayfish, you should try a shallower river!! She's not looking for crayfish! I can't take it anymore.
I've had enough.
Goodbye!! Look out!! That was dangerous.
You're more dangerous!! [Your dream will be granted if you believe What is your dream?.]
[My dream is for the Gin Tama anime to not end and continue past April.
.]
["People with Dark Pasts Can't Shut Up".]
[Kodokan Dojo.]
Sis sure is late.
I got paid today, so I made nabe.
She's probably slinging it to a customer after hours.
It's ready to eat, by the way.
Hey, what did you put in there? It looks like a witch's brew.
Anyway, I put in everything from the fridge.
Nabe taste best when you put in all sorts of things.
What do you think, Kagura? It tastes like the bottom of your foot.
Hey, that's terrible.
My feet are weapons.
They're your feet.
What are you going to do? I could try taking more showers.
I'm not talking about your feet.
I'm talking about the Nabe! Nabe!! I'm home.
Oh no.
She's back.
Sis is back.
She's back.
She's back.
She's back.
Do we have any ingredients left that can save this thing?! That's it!! I'll put my feet in.
The same nasty flavors might cancel each other out.
Kagura-chan, what are you putting in there? It's Bäagen-Dash ice cream.
Sis said she loves Bäagen-Dash, so she's bound to love this.
Kagura-chan, that's like tossing her favorite things down the drain.
Let's clean up.
It's better if we get rid of this!! Destroy all the evidence! Stop that.
Don't give up.
The match is over if we give up!! Shin-chan, do you know where the Bäagen-Dash is? I put it in the fridge.
The match has been cancelled due to excessive nabe.
This is bad.
She's already noticed the Bäagen-Dash missing.
Dig it out! Where's the ladle?! Forget it! It's already melted.
Hot hot hot hot Hot!! Welcome.
[Oedo Mart.]
One hundred cartons of Bäagen-Dash please.
Sir, even if you get a hundred cartons of Bäagen-Dash, your wish won't be granted.
Just bring me a hundred cartons, baldy.
Sorry.
I was thinking of cheering you up with some Bäagen-Dash I tried to stop them.
They're really hopeless.
Well, at least we have nabe.
Hanako-chan, have some.
Oh.
You don't like nabe? You were from Osaka, weren't you? Would you like an okonomiyaki instead? [NOTE: Okonomiyaki is a Japanese dish which consists of a variety of toppings that are placed onto or mixed into a batter which is fried.
Toppings vary from region to region.
Osaka is known for its okonomiyaki.
.]
Okasa? Are you a migrant worker? Me too.
We're alike.
Hanako-chan Oh no, sorry.
Ever since I came to Edo, I haven't experienced much kindness.
I never thought that people like you lived here.
Hanako-chan Okasa, what's wrong? Cheer up! [NOTE: Kagura calls her "Okasa" instead of "Osaka".
It is a slang term.
.]
Have a drink!! Drinking makes everything better! Hanako-chan, do you think you can talk about it? I'd like to help.
After all, we're coworkers and friends Otae-chan Really? Will you really help me? Yes.
If you'd like.
Umm In that case This is difficult to say, butm I won't lend you any money.
O-Of course not Will you listen to my story? Dream catcher? Yes.
I fell for something pretty terribly I came to Edo to fulfill my dream of becoming a dancer, but I was swindled out of all the money I'd saved up.
Why? I was tricked! They took advantage of my weakness.
[Low Flower Cafe.]
Oh? You want to become a dancer.
So that's why you're saving up your earnings at a snack house.
That's very admirable.
I never knew there were young people with such ideals! But you can't achieve your dream just by hoping for it.
If you could, the world would be filled with pilots and baseball players.
Hope is the power to pursue your dreams.
But you need another power in order to achieve them.
We call it a dream catcher.
Have you heard of it? Dream catcher? That's right.
Most people would say that you either have the power to catch dreams or you don't.
Some people are born with it and others are born without.
The Dream Faith shows us how to overcome our innate handicaps in order to make everyone and ourselves happy.
Do you know the one thing held in common by everyone who has achieved their dreams? [Note: Pide = Hide Tanaka, Chinjo = Tsuyoshi Shinjo.]
Prince Leyasu, Hideyoshi Toyotomi, the soccer player Pide and the baseball player Chinjo were all born with this.
We've succeeded in producing it artificially.
And here it is! What is that? They said that people who achieved their dreams had a mole sprouting hair somewhere on their body.
I spent big money for this stick-on mole.
But nothing happened.
I was duped.
Are you stupid?! Are you going to let that tiny bean dictate your life?! Were you planning on dancing with that dirty-looking mole?! A mole with a hair on it?! Okasa!! This is no time to hide your head in the stew! What else happened to you? There, there.
You did great, Okasa.
Next time, let's try for thirty-seconds.
I then converted to the Dream Faith.
Oh Also, I couldn't refuse newspaper solicitations, so I ended up subscribing to nine papers Edo is so overwhelming!! I can't live in this concrete jungle.
You wouldn't even be able to live in a jungle filled with sloths.
Osaka was a warm-hearted town.
Naturally, there were bad-tempered people, but everyone had a certain kind of warmth that you'd never expect from a stranger.
But everyone in Edo is so cold.
People treat each other like strangers.
I don't have the confidence to live here.
If you're suffering that badly, then shouldn't you go back home? You can dance anywhere.
But wherever you go, I think you should learn to take care of yourself a little better.
But If you still want to pursue your dream in Edo, I'll help you out.
Edo has its own brand of warmheartedness.
Right Gin-san? [Dream.]
Fellow believers! Do you have dreams?! We dream like crazy!! Are you running after your dreams? We run like crazy!! Well, everyone, what a joy it is to see you all so full of the faith! If you continue chasing your dreams at this pace, you'll catch those dreams any day now!! Umm, today, Hanako, who dreams of being a dancer, has brought us some new dream chasers.
Let me introduce them to you all.
Hello, everyone! Do you have dreams?! We dream like crazy!! Tae Shimura-san, what is your dream? To rebuild my father's dojo.
Hanako-chan, do you know what your dream is? To get my money back from a phony relig- My dream is to eat a bowl of rice covered with a whole jar of seaweed tsukudani.
[NOTE: Tsukudani is seafood or meat that has been boiled in soy sauce.]
But if it comes true, I won't have anything to dream about, so forget it!! Is that so? You probably want better eyesight.
I don't need to ask you.
Hey.
Ask me!! What's your dream? Dreams? I threw that kiddie crap away a long time ago.
Then why did you come here? Look, I'm not gonna fake it, okay? How about silky hair or something? Sure, I'll go with that.
Get out of here!! Those are the lamest dreams I've ever heard of! What are you after? Are you really believers? Maybe I still need to be convinced.
I hear you've got the power to grant dreams.
I wanted to see it with my eyes.
Gin-san!! Aren't you forgetting why we're here? Wait.
Before we get her money back, shouldn't we reveal what he truly is? Who are you? We won't let you make fun of Tomu-sama!! Get out! Get out! How amusing You want to see my power? This is a utopia where dreams come true.
If you train here, I'll teach you How to gain the power to grant dreams like I can.
Dream Catcher!! What are you doing? You said your dream is to have silky hair, right? Take a look at your head.
I-Impossible.
Gin-san's naturally wavy hair has Become silky!! Your hairstyle has even changed, too! Really? You're joking, right? Hey.
Wow! It's all silky!! It doesn't stick together or fly away! Yahoo!! Now it won't get tangled on rainy days!! Before you start celebrating, grieve over that hair style!! Now do you see? This is the Dream Catcher!! Those who believe in the Dream Faith can gain this power.
The power to grant everyone's dreams.
What's the meaning of this? There must be some sort of trick to it.
Right, Gin-san? I am yours to command, Ham-sama.
It's not Ham, it's Tomu.
Hey! I don't like this kind of Gin-san.
Get a grip, Gin-chan.
You Give us back the old Gin-chan.
What are you talking about? This is my true self.
An evil priest put a curse on me that made my hair ugly and naturally wavy.
Don't say that! Have confidence in yourself.
What are you without your naturally wavy hair?! Young lady, your dream was to have a bowl of rice with a mountain of seaweed tsukudani on it, wasn't it? Okay, okay.
Dream Catcher!! Whoa!! It really appeared!! I am yours to command, Ham Man.
What do you mean "ham man"? I told you, I'm Tomu.
He got her too! And so easily!! Everyone, let's celebrate.
We have new members!! Let's achieve our dreams and be happy!! Praise the Dream Faith!! Praise the Dream Faith!! Praise the Dream Faith!! Dureammmm Catcha!! Not like that!! You focus too much on the pronunciation.
You're not putting any feeling into it.
Feeling? All right.
I think I can do it now.
Die, ugly!! Hey, those feelings are of murderous intent! What are you doing? They've forgotten why we're here and have completely fallen into their trap.
These are my feelings towards you.
Please accept them.
Leave those idiots.
Keep them to yourself! Anyway, I'm beginning to understand why he has so many followers.
They were shown that I wonder how he did it.
Shin-chan, we didn't come here to prove that he's a fraud or anything.
If you forget what we came here to do, you'll end up like those idiots.
You're right.
We've got to get Hanako-san's money back from that phony religious leader and put Hanako-san at ease.
No.
We're here so we can extort money from that phony religious leader and rebuild our father's dojo.
What? I I don't remember agreeing to that objective!! When did that become the plan?! Are you planning on taking money that was tricked out of the hands of good people for your own selfish purposes? There's nothing wrong with receiving a little reward money.
We're going to save the rest of the money.
You're taking all of it!! You planned on doing that from the start.
Don't make me sound like a crook.
I plan on getting back Hanako-chan's money.
Oh, come to think of it, where's Hanako-chan? Dream Catcher! Honestly How any times do you have to be duped for you to learn? Come on, take us to Jam's room.
Sis, it's Tomu.
No, it's Tim Huh? I'm not sure anymore What do you plan to do, Otae-chan? We shouldn't stay here long.
Let's go after the safe in Timroth's room.
Who's Timroth? That doesn't even resemble his name anymore! Cracking his safe? That's like stealing.
I won't do it! Hanako-chan, where did you get those clothes? Oh well.
I'll do it for my dream! Hanako-chan, try not to stand out too much.
Hanako-chan, go back to Osaka already.
Honestly, what fools they all are.
They can't even figure out such a simple trick Are they blind? Dreams make people blind.
Thanks to that, I make quite a killing.
I can't quit being a religious leader now.
This is all thanks to your power.
Why don't you come down from time to time and have a drink with me? Hey, you're up there, aren't you? Owowow Hey.
Hanako-chan, you were struggling too much.
What are you doing? Owowowow.
Oh no.
I'm going to go bald!! Bald! Ah, that hurt.
Figures he'd use real glue on it.
But how did he do that so fast? Gin-chan.
You really look better like that.
Hey, this is the men's bathroom.
So it really was a trick.
I thought you had completely fallen for it.
You thought I would believe that? I was going to destroy this place, so I was checking it out.
M-Me, too.
I acted like I was tricked, so I could check it out.
Tsukudani would never convince me.
Yeah, yeah, I know.
It's true.
As proof, I dug up some information on Tomu.
Oh? Tomu's done the same demonstration as he did with us in front of his followers many times.
But it's only been pathetic dreams like curing baldness or getting a knock-off Louis Vuitton handbag.
He's been granting dreams that are easily attainable.
He can prepare for anything by asking his believers what their dreams are ahead of time But the problem is how he was able to make my wig and your food appear out of nowhere.
Someone so fast they can't be seen It can't be.
A ninja.
I saw it on TV.
That's so cliché Owowowow.
Ow.
This is bad.
Blood came out again.
I clenched too hard.
Owowow Gin-san, Kagura-chan!! Shinpachi, what's wrong? You need to take a dump? Is it gonna be a photo-finish? Bad news.
It's my sister and Hanako-chan!! Everyone, I have an unfortunate announcement.
We had a traitors in our midst.
They snuck into my room and tried to steal your offerings.
Do you think this is forgivable?! Never!! Die! Everyone, open your eyes.
You're all being tricked by this man You bastard! You threw a rock at me.
I'll remember your face!! I'll kill you afterwards!! I will leave the punishment of these traitors to you! Dream Catcher holds the power to grant wishes!! Everyone, wish intently for the sort of punishment you want them to receive.
Ow! Hey, that hurts!! And, these criminals will get the punishment they deserve without us lifting our own hands against them! Ow! My eye!! Punishment?! Just kill them.
That's right.
Kill them!! Kill, kill, kill, kill It's decided.
You will be punished with death.
Just try it, faker If you think you can You just talk about dreams and wishes, but you don't do anything.
You're all such naïve people.
Otae-chan You think you have any power over us? You have no proof.
Where do you get such confidence at a time like this? We believe in something far more powerful than you! What could be more powerful than dreams? That would be our friends.
What's that?! There's someone on the roof! Wh-What? Where?! Gin-chan!! Over there!! Dream Catcher! Unveiled! Oh! A ninja! What's this? Someone fell from the beams!! Hey! Hattori-san! Get back up there! What am I paying you for? I-I can't S-Something jabbed me in the butt.
Stop fooling around.
I picked you up off the streets after the Oniwabanshu downsized you.
[NOTE: The Oniwabanshu was a group of ninjas formed by Yoshimune Tokugawa.
.]
Without you, I'm just a man.
Sorry.
I'm quitting.
The toilets here aren't bidet toilets.
My butt can't take it anymore.
Later!! Hey! I-It's a ninja.
Why does Tomu-sama have a ninja? You still don't get it? This is the truth behind the Dream Catcher.
Think back.
Did he ever make a dream come true that wasn't simple and concrete things? He pre-interviewed all his converts and chose only dreams that were easy to grant.
He kept a ninja hidden in the beams and acted as if he was performing miracles at swift speeds.
You were tricked.
Impossible.
We would never fall for such a silly trick.
That's right.
I was bald, but now I have a head of hair.
Hey, this is a toupee! It's true.
Why didn't you notice it before? Well, I didn't touch it 'cause I didn't want my new hair to fall out! Hey, Tomu! You bastard!! How dare you trick us!! Give us back our money!! Where are you going, Guru? Why don't you use your Dream Catcher for something like this.
Pray to your hairy mole for help!! Like us, he was a pathetic man who was couldn't see anything because he was absorbed in his dream.
Yes.
But the only thing different was you had people to help you.
It's all about whether you have friends or not, isn't it? If I get like that, help me out, okay, Hanako-chan? Of course.
Next time, I'll show you Osaka's kindheartedness.
D-D-Dream Catcha Please let me win big at pachinko What are you doing, Gin-san? [Preview.]
Gin-chan, I want to eat a steamed pork bun! I don't have any.
Go ask Santa for one.
You can't fool me.
Even Yuming is singing there's no Santa! [Yuming = Yumi Matsutoya.]
The next episode Hey, isn't Christmas already over by the next episode? ["People Who Say that Santa Doesn't Really Exist Actually Want to Believe in Him".]
[And the other story is about a battle, Gintoki Sakata versus Zenzo Hattori.
.]
[Prayer Won't Make Your Worldly Desires Go Away! Control Yourself.
.]

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