Goof Troop (1992) s02e02 Episode Script

Maximum Insecurity

1
♪♪
H-H-H-HIT IT ♪
LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON ♪
YOU'RE ALWAYS
NUMBER ONE ♪
THERE'S BUDDIES,
THERE'S PALS ♪
YEAH ♪
YOU ALWAYS SEEM
TO WORK THINGS OUT ♪
CAN'T YOU SEE
YOU'RE TWO OF A KIND ♪
LOOKIN' FOR
A REAL GOOD TIME? ♪
A REAL GOOD
TIME ♪
AAH!
REPOR
TO THE GOOF TROOP ♪
AND WE'LL ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
THE BEST OF FRIENDS
FOREVER ♪
SIDE BY SIDE
WHEREVER WE GO ♪
WE'RE ALWAYS
READY TO ROLL ♪
NOW GIMME
A BEAT ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
AND WE ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
THE BEST OF FRIENDS
FOREVER ♪
NOW WE'RE CALLING
EVERYONE ♪
COME ALONG
AND JOIN THE FUN ♪
REPORT TO
THE GOOF TROOP ♪
LA DO BE DA BOP
LA BA DO BOP ♪
YEAH!
HEADS UP, PJ. INCOMING!
WHOA! TWO POINTS,
DUDE-O!
CATCH YA AT THE TOP
OF THE HILL!
HEADS UP, PEEJSTER!
HEY, YOU
WHO, ME?
OH, MY GOSH!
LEECH!
LEECH, I'M REALLY SORRY
THAT IT'S SATURDAY.
I MEAN, NOT THA
I DON'T LIKE SATURDAYS,
BUT BECAUSE IT'S NO
A SCHOOL DAY
I DON'T HAVE
ANY LUNCH MONEY FOR YOU
TO BEAT ME OUT OF,
FOR OLD TIMES SAKE,
SO I'LL JUST SAY GOODBYE.
YOU OWE ME, PUDGY!
HEADS UP!
WHOOOOA!
SORRY, MAN.
I DIDN'T SEE--
YIKES! LEECH!
SORRY I DON'T HAVE
ANY LUNCH MONEY ON ME
BUT IT'S SATURDAY.
I GUESS YOU'RE DONE
WITH THIS ONE, HUH?
I'LL JUST GET RID
OF THIS FOR YOU, LEECH.
LATER, BIG GUY.
10 GOES INTO 3.
CARRY THE 8.
ADD 16.
CHECK IT OUT, PEEJ!
WITH THE CAN MONEY,
PLUS THE BUCKS WE'VE SAVED,
WE'LL HAVE
EXACTLY ENOUGH
[BOTH]
FOR THE CONCERT TICKETS!
SUBLIMINAL MESSENGERS,
HERE WE COME!
TOMORROW NIGH
AT THE SPOONERCADDIE ARENA
AND STOCK YARDS,
BE THERE
OR BE OBLONG!
[BOTH]
YEAH!
WAAH!
IT IS EASY!
YEP. THIS STUFF'LL BE WORTH
SOME SERIOUS CASH
SOON AS I GET I
TO THE RIGHT PEOPLE.
PJ, WE DID IT!
WE DID IT!
WHOA!
I'LL SAVE YA!
YEAH? SO,
WHO'S GONNA
SAVE YOU?
[BOTH]
WHOA!
AAH!
[CRASH]
HEY, I'M REALLY SORRY.
OOPS!
WHAT THE--
GIVE ME THAT BOTTLE!
[SIREN]
LISTEN, I GO
A LITTLE PROPOSITION
FOR YOU TWO.
YOU TWO BABYSI
THAT BOTTLE FOR ME.
I'LL BE BACK
TO GET IT LATER,
O.K.?
I DON'T THINK THIS IS
SUCH A HOT IDEA, MAN.
JUST TAKE
THE PERFUME BOTTLE ALREADY,
AND GIVE US THE
TICKETSPLEASE.
SURE, SURE,
YOU'LL GET THE TICKETS
AFTER I GE
THE BOTTLE BACK.
YOU KNOW,
LIKE INSURANCE.
OH, BY THE WAY, LADIES,
I WOULDN'T LET THE COPS
CATCH ME WITH THA
IF I WERE YOU,
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
GOTTA THINK!
GOTTA THINK!
MAX, I CAN'T THINK!
O.K., DON'T PANIC.
WITH THE POLICE IN THE STORE,
WE CAN'T RETURN
THE PERFUME.
THEY'D ARREST US
FOR SURE.
BUT--BUT--
BESIDES,
LEECH HAS OUR TICKETS.
IF WE DON'
GIVE THIS BACK,
WE'LL BLOW
THE CONCERT.
WHOA, NO WAY!
NOT THE CONCERT!
UH, WHAT DO WE DO
WITH THIS
TILL WE DECIDE?
NO. IT'S JUST POISON!
I GOT YOU, PEEJ!
O.K.?
LET IT GO, BUD.
I HAVE AN IDEA.
YEAH?
WE'LL CONSUL
A HIGHER AUTHORITY.
YOU MEAN
NO. LOWER.
NO. MUCH LOWER.
YOU MEAN OUR DADS?
WHY NOT?
THEY'RE ALWAYS
BUGGING US
TO COME TO THEM
WITH OUR PROBLEMS
ANYWAY.
I FEEL SICK.
PEG,
I DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE.
- JUST US, SIR.
- OH, HI, MR. PETE.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
YOUR MOTHER.
HASN'T YOUR VOICE
CHANGED YET,
FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD?
COME ON, KIDS.
GOT A SURPRISE
FOR YOUR MOM.
WE'LL TRY I
IN THE GARAGE.
OH, SURE, MR. PETE.
WHATEVER YOU SAY.
BOYS, SAY HELLO TO MY NEW
TASKMASTER
COMBO POWER SANDER
AND FISH SCALER.
I GOT ENOUGH OOMPH
RIGHT HERE
TO SCALE
A WHALE EVERY DAY
INCLUDING LEAP YEAR!
MAKES ME TINGLE
DOWN TO MY TOES
JUST THINKING ABOUT IT.
NICE TO HAVE AROUND
IF YOU'RE EVER ATTACKED
BY MOBY DICK.
HEY, THAT'S RIGHT.
NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT.
I'M TELLING YOU, BOYS.
THIS LITTLE BEAUTY
WAS A REAL STEAL, SEE?
FUNNY YOU SHOULD
MENTION STEAL, DAD.
FOR WHAT THEY CHARGED,
I FELT LIKE I WAS
ROBBING THE PLACE.
YEAH, SIR,
NOW ABOUT ROBBING
THE PLACE--
WHAT? OH YES, SON,
NOW WHAT IS IT?
WELL, YOU WERE TALKIN',
DAD, SIR,
SUPPOSE YOU HAPPEN TO SEE
SOMEONE STEAL SOMETHIN'--
LIKE IT WAS
FOR SURE STEALING.
YEAH,
ONLY YOU DIDN'T HAVE
ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT.
NOTHING TO DO WITH IT.
STEALING'S WRONG,
AGAINST THE LAW,
AND IT'S JUST PLAIN
BAD MANNERS.
AND IF I EVER CAUGH
ANYONE I KNOW STEALING
I'D SCALE AND SAND
THEM MYSELF.
UNDERSTOOD?
[GULP]
THANKS, DAD.
GOTCHA, MR. PETE.
AH, GREAT.
LEECH IS GONNA
KILL US,
THE POLICE ARE GONNA
ARREST US,
AND MY DAD'S
GONNA SAND US.
LOOK, WE'LL HIDE
THE BOTTLE HERE
FOR TONIGHT.
IN THE MORNING,
WE'LL THINK OF SOMETHING.
LIKE CHANGING OUR NAMES
AND PUTTING OURSELVES UP
FOR ADOPTION?
YOU'RE GONNA LOVE
THIS SURPRISE, PEGUMS.
OHH! OH, DARLING.
IS IT A BRAND-NEW REAL
IMITATION FUR COAT?
NO. SMALLER.
OH,
IT'S THAT FANCY CHINA
YOU PROMISED ME
WHEN WE GOT MARRIED,
BUT I STILL HAVEN'T SEEN
SO MUCH AS A SALAD PLATE OF!
OH, COME ON, PEG.
THINK EXCITEMENT.
THINK THRILLING!
THINK HEART'S DESIRE.
[GASPS]
OH, PETE!
THAT DIAMOND NECKLACE
I'VE WANTED?
NO, POOPSIE.
FEAST YOUR PEEPERS
ON THIS.
HUHHH!
IT'S A PROTOTYPE,
PIGEON LIPS.
THERE'S ONLY ONE
IN EXISTENCE,
AND WE'VE GOT IT.
I FEEL LIKE A NEW FATHER.
A POWER TOOL IS
YOUR BIG SURPRISE?
HA HA!
AIN'T IT A BEAUT?
HONESTLY, PEG.
NOW, WHAT GOOD WOULD
A STUPID NECKLACE BE
ON THAT GREAT FISHING TRIP
WE GOT PLANNED NEXT MONTH?
YOUR CHOICE--
ICE FOR MOMMY
OR COLD SHOULDER
FOR PAPA.
YOU TELL ME!
AND CLEAN UP
THIS MESS!
[PETE]
YOU DON'T LIKE IT?
WELL, SON, IT'S THE END
OF THE LINE.
[SIZZLING]
NO, DAD!
YEP, I CHECKED.
IT'S 10 AFTER 9:00.
I DON'T WANT TO MISS
THE EVENING NOOSE.
WHAT DID YOU SAY?
YOU KNOW, THE NEWS.
IT'S ABOUT CRIME
WHAT?
IT'S ABOUT TIME
YOU WENT TO BED.
GOOD NIGHT, DAD.
MAN, I'M NEVER
GOING TO GET TO SLEEP.
[SNORING]
THANKS FOR TAKIN'
THE RAP,
YOU SAP.
TODAY IS
THE FIRST DAY
OF THE RES
OF YOUR LIFE
IN JAIL.
NO!
NO! OH, NO!
DON'T! DON'T!
NO, DON'T!
HELP!
I'M TAKING
THAT BOTTLE BACK
MYSELF NOW,
LEECH OR NO LEECH.
MAX, IT'S YOU.
MAX, WE GOTTA
GET RID OF THAT BOTTLE.
YOU WON'T BELIEVE
THE DREAMS I HAD,
NIGHTMARES.
OH, YES, I WOULD.
COME ON.
WAY I FIGURE IT,
WE'LL JUST SLIP IT BACK
ON THE DRUGSTORE SHELF,
NO PROBLEM.
WE'LL DEAL
WITH LEECH LATER.
IT'S--IT'S
GONE.
AAAAAAAH!
COOL IT, PEEJ.
YOU WANT TO WAKE UP
THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD?
WE'RE GONNA DIE.
WE'RE DEFINITELY
GONNA DIE.
GOTTA THINK.
GOTTA THINK.
LEECH WANTS THE PERFUME.
THE POLICE WANT THE PERFUME.
WE HAD THE PERFUME,
NOW WE DON'T.
YEP, DEATH DEFINITELY.
THEN JAIL!
HOLD ON, PEEJ!
WE'RE NOT GONNA DIE,
AND WE'RE NOT GOING
TO JAIL.
WE DON'T HAVE
A CHOICE, MAN.
WE DON'T HAVE
THE PERFUME!
SO WE'LL GET IT BACK.
IT'S GOTTA BE AROUND
HERE SOMEPLACE.
OH, THIS IS STUPID.
WE'RE NEVER GONNA FIND IT.
IT'S GOTTA BE HERE.
NO ONE KNEW IT WAS HERE,
AND IT DIDN'T JUS
GET UP AND WALK AWAY,
DID IT?
- UNLESS
- UNLESS WHAT?
UNLESS SOMETHING DID
THE WALKING FOR IT.
[GRRR]
THERE IT IS!
THERE IT IS!
QUICK, QUICK.
LET'S GET IT!
MAX, HELP. I'M STUCK.
AFTER THAT FLEABAG!
[RUFF RUFF]
[DOG BARKS]
[RUNNING]
[THUD]
[CLANK]
HEH HEH HEH!
[COUGH COUGH]
[COUGH COUGH]
I HATE DOGS.
[HUMMING]
CUTE LITTLE BOTTLE
OF SMELLY STUFF.
[PEG]
PISTOL?
UH-OH.
PISTOL!
WHAT HAPPENED
IN HERE?
OH, MOMMY,
YOU'RE THE BESTEST MOMMY
IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD!
AND I WANNA BE JUST LIKE YOU
AND I WANNA LOOK LIKE YOU,
AND I WANNA SMELL LIKE YOU,
I HOPE YOU LIKE
THIS PERFUME I JUST FOUND.
PISTOL, HONEY,
IF YOU FOUND THIS,
THEN IT'S PROBABLY
FROM DADDY.
IT MUST BE
AN APOLOGY PRESENT.
OF COURSE!
OH, SWEETIE.
MOMMY HAS TO GO FIND
THAT GREAT BIG LUG NU
AND THANK HIM PROPERLY.
OH, AND, HONEY,
CLEAN UP THIS MESS!
[SNIFFING]
PJ, DO YOU SMELL THAT?
YEAH, AND THAT STINK
WON'T COME OUT FOR WEEKS.
NO. IT'S THE PERFUME!
PETE.
OH, PETEY, SWEETIE,
OH, COME OUT SO I CAN
THANK YOU PROPERLY!
[WHIMPERING]
WHY, SWEETUMS,
WHAT'S WRONG?
[SNIFF]
OOH!
PUPPSIE-WUPPSIE!
YOU NEED A BATH
AND A GOOD SPRITZ
OF THIS.
I GOT AN IDEA
I THINK.
[HUMMING]
MOMMY'S LITTLE PUPPY
IS GOING
TO SMELL WONDERFUL
FOR A CHANGE.
PJ, YOU HAD AN IDEA,
AND IT WORKED!
YEAH. WAY COOL.
NOW WE CAN FINALLY
RETURN THIS STUFF.
THANKS.
LEECH!
I GOT BIG-BUCK PLANS
FOR WHAT THIS'LL BRING IN.
YOU'RE NOT GETTING
THIS BOTTLE BACK, LEECH!
- I'M NOT?
- HE'S NOT?
NO, AND YOU'LL LEAVE
IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD
FOR YOU.
GROUNDING YOU TWO RUNTS
INTO THE DIR
WILL BE REAL GOOD
FOR ME.
O.K.
WHICH ONE OF YA
WANTS IT FIRST?
COME ON, PEEJ.
TIME FOR THE OLD
ONE-TWO.
WHAT OLD ONE-TWO?
UHH!
OUR CONCERT TICKETS!
GOTCHA!
WAAAH!
ATTA BOY, PEEJ!
YOU DON'T EXPECT ME
TO FALL FOR THAT OLD TRICK,
DO YA, YA GOOF?
NAH. YOU PROBABLY
WOULDN'T.
OOH!
I GOT THE TICKETS!
I GOT THE PERFUME!
AND I GOT YOU BOTH.
YOU LITTLE
PJ, TOSS IT.
I GOT IT,
I GOT IT.
I GOT IT,
I GOT IT.
I DON'T GOT IT.
I DON'T GOT IT.
THAT'S GONNA
COST YOU, PAL.
JOKE'S ON YOU.
I'M BROKE.
BROKEN'S
MORE LIKE IT.
DON'T PANIC, PEEJ.
I'VE GOT AN IDEA.
[BLOW DRYER RUNNING]
NOW WHERE'S THAT PERFUME?
OH, SO THERE YOU ARE,
YOU GREAT BIG AVOCADO!
OH, THANK YOU
FOR THE SURPRISE.
BUT--BUT, TINSNIPS,
YOU SENT ME OU
TO THE GARAGE
BECAUSE OF MY
LITTLE SURPRISE.
REMEMBER?
I'M NOT TALKING ABOU
YOUR NASTY OLD
POWER TOOL SURPRISE.
I'M TALKING ABOU
YOUR BIG, EXPENSIVE
BOTTLE OF PERFUME
AS AN APOLOGY
GIFT SURPRISE.
OH.
OH, OH, OH, OH.
YOU MEAN THAT SURPRISE.
SO YOU LIKED IT THEN?
LIKED IT?
I LOVED IT.
IN FACT,
I WANT TO SPRITZ
POOKUMS HERE
SO SHE SMELLS HER
VERY, WERY BEST.
WHERE'D
YOU PUT IT, HONEY?
PUT IT?
OH, NOW,
DON'T PLAY COY WITH ME.
I KNOW ALL ABOU
THE SURPRISE,
SO YOU MAY AS WELL
GIVE IT BACK TO ME!
WELL
OF COURSE,
PUNKY DOODLE.
IT'S JUST THAT IT
IT WAS PERFUME
YOU SAY?
MIDNIGHT IN MAZOOLA.
MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE.
WELL, OF COURSE.
I WAS JUST CHECKING,
DARLIN'.
THE SPRAYER DOODLEY
WASN'T SPITTING RIGH
SO I TOOK I
BACK TO THE STORE
TO FIX IT. YEAH.
OH, DEAR.
WELL, I HAVE
SOME ERRANDS TO RUN
ANYWAY,
SO I'LL JUS
PICK IT UP MYSELF.
WHEN WILL IT BE READY?
YOU CAN'T DO THAT.
I MEAN,
YOU DON'T HAVE
THE RECEIPT,
AND--AND I--
I DO,
BUT I DON'T HAVE IT ON ME,
SO I'LL JUST HAVE TO DO I
LATER. O.K.?
WHEW.
MIDNIGHT IN MAZOOLA, EH?
NO PROBLEM.
I'LL JUST BUY PEGUMS
ANOTHER BOTTLE.
I'M A GENIUS.
[BELL RINGS]
I'M GLAD YOU CAME TO ME
WITH THIS LITTLE PROBLEM
OF YOURS.
THANKS
FOR UNDERSTANDING,
DAD.
YEAH. I FIGURED
WE'D BE SPENDING
THE RES
OF OUR LIVES IN JAIL.
AND I'VE GOT A CURFEW.
NOW SEE HOW
AN EXPERT DOES IT.
PARDON ME, MISS,
BUT I NEED TO RETURN
THIS ITEM--
RECEIPT, PLEASE.
I DON'T HAVE
A RECEIPT.
NO RECEIPT, NO RETURNS,
NO EXCEPTION.
I'M JUST TRYING
TO BRING BACK THIS
BOTTLE OF PERFUME.
I DON'T CARE
IF YOU'RE TRYING
TO BRING BACK ELVIS.
NO RETURNS
WITHOUT RECEIPT.
BOBBO,
TO THE FRONT COUNTER.
NO, PLEASE.
IT'S NOT LIKE THAT.
TROUBLE, DORIS?
NO TROUBLE.
JUST A QUICK RETURN.
LIKE DORIS TOLD YOU.
NO RETURNS.
DO I NEED TO CALL
MY PAL BARNEY
OVER AT THE PRECINCT?
QUICK. WHILE DAD'S
GOT HIM OCCUPIED.
HOW LUCKY
DO YOU FEEL?
I'LL LET YOU KNOW WHEN
I'M DONE THROWING UP.
COME ON.
HOW HARD CAN IT BE
TO OPEN THIS THING?
HERE.
LET ME SHOW YOU.
OH, THANKS.
UHH!
LEECH!
THANKS AGAIN.
WE GOT TO
GIVE IT BACK, LEECH.
YEAH. STEALING'S WRONG.
AGAINST THE LAW.
AND JUST PLAIN
BAD MANNERS.
DAD! WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
[GASPS]
MIDNIGHT IN MAZOOLA!
I'VE LOOKED
EVERYWHERE FOR THIS.
THANKS, KID.
PEEJ! OH,
THERE YOU ARE!
MOM!
PETE,
IT'S BEEN HOURS.
IS MY PERFUME
FINALLY READY?
WHY, YES,
MY LITTLE MOON PIE.
ALL SET.
GIVE ME THAT!
WHAT THE--
OHH!
[CRASH]
COME ON! LEECH
IS GETTING AWAY!
LEECH!
SHOPLIFTING AGAIN, EH?
BEEN NEARLY A WEEK
SINCE WE'VE ARRESTED YOU.
SHOULDA KNOWN YOU WERE DUE.
NO, NO, MAN,
YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG.
THIS ISN'T MINE.
IT'S HIS.
NO, IT'S NOT MINE.
HONEST.
I WISH IT WAS,
BUT IT'S NOT MINE EITHER.
OF COURSE NOT YOURS,
YOU SILLY BILLY.
IT'S MINE!
OH, I'M SORRY,
MRS. PETE.
BUT IT DOESN'
BELONG TO ANY OF US.
IT BELONGS
TO THE STORE.
LEECH STOLE IT.
WE WERE JUS
TRYING TO GIVE IT BACK.
ALL RIGHT. YOU GOT ME.
JUST GET THOSE BRATS
OUT OF MY LIFE.
NO, MAN.
YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG.
BOYS,
I'M SO PROUD OF YOU,
TRYING TO DO
THE RIGHT THING AND ALL
LIKE YOU DID.
DON'T YOU WORRY ABOU
THAT CONCERT, KIDS.
YOUR DAD'S COME UP WITH
WITH A WONDERFUL WAY TO PAY
FOR THOSE TICKETS
YOU GAVE UP.
AFTER ALL,
YOU'VE EARNED IT.
[CASH REGISTER RINGS]
BY THE WAY, SNOOKY,
WHERE IS THAT PERFUME?
IS IT HERE?
IS IT READY?
DID YOU HAVE IT FIXED?
YOU DIDN'T HAVE IT FIXED,
DID YOU?
YOU SAID YOU WERE
GONNA HAVE IT FIXED.
YOU NEVER DO WHAT YOU SAY
YOU'RE GOING TO DO!
OH,
I LOVE THAT WOMAN.
YOU NEVER DO WHAT YOU
SAY YOU'RE GOING TO DO!
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