Gremlins: Secrets of the Mogwai (2022) s01e07 Episode Script

Never Squeeze a Fox

- [groaning]
- [evil mogwai cackling]
Hand over the mogwai
and all will be forgiven, Elle.
Oh! Hear that? The bad human knows Elle.
What a shock.
Hey, that's not fair.
Not fair?
If she hadn't bum-rushed the portal,
I wouldn't be full of poison,
my favorite bar wouldn't be surrounded
by monsters,
and my favorite mogwai, you,
would be safe at home.
If anything, my sarcasm
was an act of kindness.
If my mogwai dies,
it's because
of your selfishness.
[Elle grunting]
- [Radish] Psst.
- [Sam and Gizmo scream]
- [Sam] Radish?
- We thought we should warn you.
Greene and the bad mogwai
are here.
Uh, yeah.
Thanks for the warning, Radish.
What or who
are the rest of you?
- We're farmers.
- And fabulous.
Not to jinx it,
but I think they're gonna be
our new family.
Yeah, yeah. Glad at least one of us
might get a happy ending.
Wait. How did
you guys get inside?
We could tell you, but you might want
to distract those evil mogwai.
[laughing maniacally]
I have an idea.
- Distraction!
- [Gizmo squeals]
[evil mogwai] Bright light.
I I did it.
[groans] Oops.
Classic humans.
[evil mogwai laughing]
Not yet.
I want to make sure
we wait until the poison truly takes hold.
I prefer fights
I know I can win,
especially against a Goddess.
Oh, this ring
really complements my skin,
which does not go
with everything.
You say she protects
against all magic?
Bright Light! Bright Light!
Really? Fire counts
as bright light, too?
Here I assumed arson
would be up your alley.
Are you cowering?
If I were paying you,
I'd be furious
that I'm doing
my own bidding right now.
Where is my mogwai, and the Goddess,
and those wretched children?
Where are they?
Ah, Sam Wing. Answer me, boy.
Hi, I'm Radish.
Another child?
You are not mogwai.
I know. But we're
confused for them
all the time.
Maybe it's our accents.
Whoever told you
the mogwai was here was wrong.
It's just us.
- Maybe you should give up
- [Greene] Stop!
- [squeals]
- Not another time-sucking word from you, human scamp!
Out! Out! Out!
Go find my mogwai.
You mean to tell me
that you've been drinking
in that bar for 1,000 years
and never knew it had a wine cellar?
[Nuwa] Hey,
I just drank the wine.
I don't ask
where it comes from.
Is Radish gonna be okay?
What? He volunteered.
Besides, he's a survivor
who found a family.
You should be asking that
about us.
Sisters rejoice.
There's a furry mogwai
in the market.
And Nuwa's too weak
to protect it.
Who fancies
a bite of immortality?
[theme music playing]
[grunts] Can't you move
any faster?
One more complaint and I swear
I'll drop you on your magical face.
Oh! How very human of you.
Something's not comfortable
and you give up.
Good plan.
Do you two even have a plan?
Oh, we did.
But it turned out to be
a mean old drunk who can't let go of the past.
- [Nuwa grunts]
- Both of you need to stop.
- [Gizmo chitters]
- The plan is to get somewhere safe,
- away from Greene.
- Bad plan.
Okay. Is everything
you say negative?
Not when I'm talking
to an intelligent creature.
- Remember, everything here wants to eat Gizmo.
- [Sam and Gizmo gasp]
Nowhere is safe.
Gizmo's in more danger
than your tiny human brains can imagine.
Fine, old witch.
You don't like our plan.
What's yours?
Well, I'm not going to respond
to being called a witch.
So, [clears throat] get me
to the Bagua room
on the other side
of the market, across the bridge.
It's a cosmic crossroads.
So even though
I don't have magic,
there's someone there
that can send Gizmo,
- and only Gizmo, home.
- [whistling]
[Gizmo gasps]
Oh, no. Fox Spirits.
Oh, we met one of those cuties
in the market.
I just want to squeeze her.
They're not cute.
We have to move.
But she's waving.
I can't be rude.
Hello. How are you,
Mrs. Fox Spirit?
It's "Miss,"
and thank you for inquiring.
I'm quite well
and quite hungry.
- Okay. I don't think they're cute anymore.
- [Gizmo] Go, go, go!
[Gizmo] Nuwa!
That is for groceries,
not Goddesses.
[yelps] Get it off! Get it off!
[gasps] Right. You got weapons
and stuff in your box.
Well, it's mostly rope.
- But I think there's some explosives.
- [Gizmo chitters]
What? You've had that
this entire time?
Explosives are wasted
on you, Sam Wing.
[Sam] Wait. We need to go
further away.
[all coughing]
Sam, give me the box.
I have a plan.
- [shrieks]
- [Fox Spirit] After the mogwai!
- [pants] Let's hope
- this works. [pants]
Not a Fox Spirit in sight.
Elle's plan worked.
Now it's only everyone else
that wants you?
- How come they all know where you are?
- [Gizmo sniffs]
Right. They can smell you.
You're like,
super smelly to them.
- [Gizmo chitters]
- We'll never lose them.
Which means I'm going
to have to fight them.
- Please tell me there's another way.
- [Gizmo exclaims]
Gizmo? Gizmo. Gizmo!
[Gizmo chittering]
[sniffs, groans]
Ugh. I can't smell
anything but fish.
- This should work.
- Bagua room!
[Sam grunts]
[whispers] I think
it's working.
That was a real two for one.
[Fox Spirits howling]
Saving Gizmo
and proving you wrong.
[Nuwa] About what?
That you have a plan?
We're still being chased.
[laughs] What? No!
That I'm selfish.
Look at me risking my life
for Gizmo.
All I see
is a reckless grifter, [grunts]
trying to con me
into sending her
to The Valley of Jade
for treasure.
[pants] Hey,
I can want treasure,
and want to get
Gizmo home, too.
Humans always have excuses
and justifications and sob stories.
But when the moment comes
and it's you or them,
you always choose you,
don't you, Elle?
[Greene] Elle.
[evil mogwai cackling]
Hand me the mogwai,
and perhaps some of this
can be forgiven.
Of course, the other monsters
hate you.
See, this is why you never meet
old reckless grifters.
[Fox Spirits howling]
What are you doing?
my favorite monsters to each other.
Intentionally or not,
thank you for my mogwai, Elle.
Do not let them pass.
[growls] Charge!
Still think this was
a good idea?
Nah. I know it was.
[evil mogwai growling]
- [gasps]
- Sisters, we've been bamboozled.
[cries, groans, screams]
Huh? [growls]
[Nuwa vomiting]
[growls, grunts]
Ooh, eyes.
[Sam sighs] Is that it?
I can't tell the difference between
what looks magical or normal anymore.
Yep, that's it.
Great. [laughs]
Then you're almost home.
[sighs sadly]
- [Sam sighs]
- [both] Mmm.
Elle! Nuwa!
[Sam yelps]
Elle! Nuwa! You made it.
Of course.
What did you expe [sniffs]
[groans] What reeks?
He's covered in dead fish.
It's brilliant.
Ugh. It's literally
the worst thing I've ever smelled.
I know.
Hey, thanks for handling the Fox Spirits.
That was really brave.
- Well, obviously.
- Opportunism can look that way to the naive.
- Oh!
- I cannot wait till the poison hits your mouth.
Sam, help me get her
to the Bagua room.
[Elle grunts]
It'll be just a second
while I make sure we can get in.
You're not even sure
you can get in?
Are there any perks
of being a Goddess?
[Nuwa] My guy sometimes takes
a long lunch. Come on, Gizmo.
- [fish cart rumbles]
- [Gizmo] Whoa!
[Gizmo chitters, yelling]
Help! Help!
[fish cart growling]
[Gizmo whimpering]
[Gizmo screaming]
[monster growling]
- [Sam] Gizmo!
- [Elle] No!
- [groans]
- [Gizmo screaming]
[Sam] Hang on, Gizmo!
[Elle] What do we do?
Elle, You might want
to stay back.
Um, excuse me?
[Gizmo] Sam!
[Gizmo screams]
[growls, roars]
- You did it!
- [both laughing]
[Nuwa] You stupid, stupid,
stupid humans.
You pushed a River Spirit
into the river,
the literal source
of its power.
[both gasp]
[Elle] Oh, no, no, no!
- No!
- [Gizmo screams]
[Nuwa panting]
[Nuwa groans]
[Gizmo] Elle!
[Sam] Her pulse is weak.
[Gizmo] Elle!
Uh, hold her hand, Gizmo.
Talk to her.
[Gizmo] Elle, please, hold on.
She's not breathing!
I need to get to a medicine shop.
There's nothing you
or any human can do for her.
[gasps] Nuwa?
What have you been drinking?
Why is there
a dead River Spirit on my doorstep?
- And a dead human girl?
- Almost dead.
And I don't have magic right now, so you're it.
We're bringing her inside.
Inside? To do what?
Nuwa, I'm your
celestial administrator, not a party trick.
[metallic clang]
[sighs] Don't get blood
on the floors.
What are you doing?
That's basically flower balm.
She is dying.
Thank you for yelling information
I already have.
That cream's not going to work.
Let me do something.
She needs
You, to let me work.
- [sobbing]
- [Gizmo chitters]
And for the record, of course,
I know this is just flower balm.
I'm not done mixing, kid.
There's one more ingredient
that changes everything.
What did you just put in there?
It's unpronounceable
if you have a human mouth.
Elle! You're alive.
[groans, gasps]
Is Gizmo okay?
[Gizmo chitters]
Not much surprises me, Elle.
But you did.
[evil mogwai cackling]
prepare a portal to The Valley of Jade.
You're all going through
the portal.
Even me?
The mogwai is approved,
but you'll need portal visas.
Lose them,
I show up and detain you.
Any vandalism
to The Valley of Jade, I detain you.
Take anything
without declaring it upon re-entry, I
Long bureaucracy short:
try not to mess everything up, okay?
Now go.
I'll hold them off long enough
for you to escape.
What! No, come with us.
How can you slow them down?
No offense,
but you have no powers.
He's going to enchant
my Guandao.
It won't last for long,
but it might be enough.
- [Gizmo nuzzling]
- [humming]
Don't let me down.
[evil mogwai growling]
Nuwa, no! Nuwa!
Come on, hurry up.
They're right outside the door.
- [Elle] Whoa!
- [Sam screams]
Nuwa, no!
[faint screaming]
Elle, are you okay?
If that's what you call it.
Where are we?
Valley of Jade!
We go.
That jeweler knew his product.
This little ring is impervious
to magic.
Then use it.
What are you waiting for?
Excellent question.
[both grunting]
[gasps, grunts]
[evil mogwai cackling]
Where is my mogwai?
You'll never be able to find him
or The Valley of Jade.
Only a God can.
And you are not a God.
Well, actually, you don't know
about my unique skill,
learned from years
of treasure hunting and to be absolutely blunt,
pure talent.
[Nuwa] No, no, no, no!
[Nuwa groaning]
The man knows
how to steal the show.
The knowledge of a God.
Ugh. Pearl Magic?
Including the location
of The Valley of Jade.
I'm glad I ate light today.
[evil mogwai cackling]
[theme music playing]
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