High Maintenance (2016) s04e02 Episode Script


1 What? You know the drill.
It's just gonna take a second.
It's just one second.
Really? - Hey.
- Hey.
- So sorry I'm late, man.
It's been very nuts.
- That's okay.
Oh, do you mind if I bring my dog? - She's a sweet potato.
- Uh, yeah, that's fine.
Okay, cool.
Thank you.
- It's, uh, shoes off, right? - Yeah.
- Oh, jeez.
Sorry! I'm so sorry.
- No, no, no.
It's fine.
- Can I use your bathroom? - Uh, yeah.
Do you remember? - It's this way, right? - Just Yeah, on the left.
- Sorry.
I'm a mess today, man.
- It's all right.
- Dealer's choice.
- All right.
That's me.
Your choice.
Fomo, shush.
- Hey, shush.
- Um - OG Kush? - Yeah, that up, right here.
- Oh.
It's all up front.
- Here you go.
I will that's fine.
Um, yeah, and I'll take one of these.
- Sativa? - Mm-hmm.
You're good, man.
- Thank you very much.
- Thank you.
Fomo! Fuck, man.
I'm so sorry.
You know, um, it's okay.
No, it's not okay.
Here's a tiny refund.
Fomo, what are you doin'? This is a shoes-off house.
Are we gonna kiss? Excited I promised you my lips In writing Take me by the hand And lead me through the room And it's so romantic And I'm so pathetic I can't see the stage 'Cause I'm looking at you Done with music, babe We're done with music Done with music, babe - Hey.
- Uh, hey.
Um - Oh, would you mind taking your shoes off? - Totally.
You can just put them right here.
I got it.
Uh, so, where are you comin - Could I use your bathroom? - Sure.
It's right down here.
- I'm over on Irving.
- Oh.
So that's pretty close.
Nothing lasts forever and I told you Everything you need to know is not true Oh.
Uh, that's for you too.
Thank you.
Right on.
Uh, you want a glass of wine, or some of this? Nah, I'm good.
- How old are you? - I'm 35.
Oh, for real? I'm 33.
- Gah - What? I'm usually going to Manhattan, and the guys are always old and married and white.
And you're like my age and gay.
I'm assuming you're gay.
I am.
It's just buggin' me out a bit.
- Oh.
- Do you go out around here? I feel like I've seen you.
- Yeah.
Is that okay? - Yeah, yeah.
Just give me a second.
You know what? Maybe I will hit that.
Here you go.
Where's your room? Whoa.
What's all this? Uh, it's some protest in Paris.
My roommate's a photographer.
- He's not here, is he? - No.
Do you ? Are these, like, your shades? Oh, they filter blue light, from screens.
I'm trying to get better at falling asleep.
- Do they work? - Eh I mean, I haven't seen a difference, but, um They look better on you.
- Is this my look? - It might be.
Do you use the site a lot? I'm sorry.
Did you wanna get started? - Or is it okay if we talk for a minute? - No, yeah, we can talk.
Do you use the site a lot? I wouldn't say a lot, but yeah, I-I use the site.
And why'd you go for me? Like what are you looking for? Nothing too crazy.
You know, somethin' chill.
I like how you said you do the whole boyfriend experience.
Do you always hire normal people or do you ever go - the porn star route? - I've done both.
I'm kind of nervous now, knowing porn stars have been in here, like - "Get on me good" - No.
Don't be.
'Cause they'd be Did they talk as much as me or did they like just Look, if you're uncomfortable - and you don't wanna do this - No, no.
Mmm! - Does my breath How Is it okay? - What? I feel like I have hungry breath.
Your place is is really clean.
It's, like, really clean.
I'm kind of scared.
I mean, it's my roommate.
- Mm-hmm.
- Like, all this stuff is his.
- And he's not your boyfriend? - Nah.
No, we're just roommates.
Uh - Can we go to the bed? - Mm-hmm.
Oh shit.
- Oh, shit.
- Yeah.
What do you want to do? Kissing is nice.
If you suck me, I'll get hard.
- Want me to fuck you, baby? - Maybe.
I Can, um Can we just lay here for a bit? Sure.
Can you put your arm around me? - Yeah.
- Yeah, that's good.
I'm sorry.
Both arms? Is that a buzz saw? It sounds like it.
- It's one A.
- Mm-hmm.
- Is this okay? - Mm-hmm.
You're not just cuddling with me 'cause you don't know how to kick me out? No, no, no, no.
This is This is great.
This is what I wanted.
- Good.
I wanna make sure that you - Thank you.
get what you want.
I'm kind of new at this.
Again? Wow.
That's disrespectful.
I didn't know this was a construction zone.
Should've worn my vest, and my hard hat Okay.
Shh shh I sat in paint.
- Bye.
- Bye, there.
And you thought I couldn't carry that precinct.
I'm man enough to admit that I was wrong.
And I'm woman enough to win.
Right? And then I was thinking of saying, like, everyone's finally gone.
I'm here.
Did you vote for me? No.
Don't tell me.
Is that right? Great.
And then you kiss.
And where are your hands going naturally within the boundaries that we talked about? Um, I was thinking here or here.
Depending on camera, like that.
- This is, this is good.
- That's right.
- I'm ticklish.
- Okay.
And you can keep it in motion.
Right? - You can start finding some comfortable - Can we? Absolutely you can.
That's right.
This is the time.
And we're jus That's great.
We're just here for a couple of beats.
Right? And then how do we wanna get to this desk? Um.
I was thinking I could push or, uh uh, not push but maybe guide her over Why don't I just pull you? - Great.
I like that.
- Right? So she's still in control.
That's right.
That's right.
This is her office.
And then there's more kissing here.
Things are heating up.
The breath is going to change.
That's right.
And the shirt drops here.
- Uh-oh.
Shirt drops here.
- Shirt drops here.
Pants are dropping here.
And I am already whip-ooh.
Blouse and bra we're removing here.
'Cause I can do a funny zipper But I don't want It doesn't need to be funny, actually, it's very - Stuck? - Yeah.
Well, I don't know 'cause I'll be fully out Let's check in with our director on this one.
Okay? Alan, what were you envisioning for this moment? - Mm - Any thoughts? Oh my God, I love you.
I love you so much! - What?! - I love you so much! Cut! That's a cut! Covering.
Covering up.
I know.
- I wonder what the sandwich o'clock is today.
- Oh yeah.
- Hi.
- Yeah.
I saw.
- Chili.
- Chili? - Mm-hmm.
- Oh, perfect.
That's exactly what I want on a hot day where I'm shooting a sex scene is chili.
- Mmm.
- Mmm.
So good.
How are you feeling? - Good.
A little hot, but good.
- Good.
- How you feeling? - Good.
Thank you, Kym.
- Mm-hmm.
- What did we do before Kym? Ah Really? Hi, this is Kym, the intimacy coordinator.
Hi, yeah.
I just wanted to check in about tomorrow.
So as you know, your rider says, there will be simulated vaginal intercourse from behind, over a radiator I hear you, but that character would never let you get on top.
But when you're on your back, that high angle, your friend.
- Here you go.
- Oh.
I gotcha, girl.
Just shift the body language a tiny bit, that's right.
And this hand is gonna be the discovering hand.
That's lovely.
You can lean in.
You close the distance.
And the twist.
- Morning.
- Morning.
- Oh, uh.
Wardrobe trailer? - Right around the corner.
Thank you.
I spoke with Cristina.
And she is okay to go topless.
Quiet on set.
But, I, I Hiyah! Stop making a fool of yourself.
Now, go to the market! What? No.
You already had two.
Put that back.
Oh, chocolate chip.
Looks good.
Good move.
Can't decide? What? I'm not even hungry.
I just feel like I'm in the way anywhere else.
Do you have high cholesterol? - What? - Uh, I Oh, um, yeah.
I don't know, um My-my mom got me this for my birthday.
So maybe I do.
- I guess I should ask her.
- Yeah I just found out I have high cholesterol.
- Oh no.
- Yeah.
I was shocked.
So, you know.
Ten hut! What are you doin' on this? Um, I'm doing sleight of hand in the background of the fund-raiser scene.
- Huh! - Yeah, it makes like no sense.
- Yeah.
- But, you know It sometimes doesn't.
- Yeah.
- And yet, here we are.
And Steven! - You know Steven Universe? - I love Steven Universe! Oh my God.
I do too.
My nephew got me into it, and now I just watch it without him.
- Yes! I do too.
- I watch it all the time! It's the best! My friends are so sick of me telling them to watch it.
- And then they don't watch it.
- They don't deserve it.
- Thank you.
- You deserve better friends.
I agree.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
I'm Kym.
- Oh.
- Hi.
Um So what-what do you do on this? I'm the intimacy coordinator.
Wow, inti I didn't realize intimacy could be coordinated.
Intimacy must be coordinated.
So how do you do it? Boundaries.
Do you do Seders? Because my family could use what you're offering.
Why? What's goin' on? What's goin' on up in there? Oh, just-just boundaries.
They don't-they don't have 'em.
And they're-they're, um They are angry and they're sad and I-I think they don't respect me much at all.
I'm sorry.
What the hell.
What the hell! What's not to respect about you? You know.
I just I bounce around to a lot of jobs, and I think they don't like the magic.
Uh, the magic got you a film career, got you started in pictures.
Did you, uh, did you tell them that? I-I think that was a, maybe a one-time thing, but thank you.
So, what do you do when an actor's uncomfortable with something? They don't have to do it.
I get called in for childbirth scenes, and miscarriage scenes, um anything where an actor where they put an actor through it.
You know, because I have a background in trauma therapy, and coaching people through PTSD.
Um So, if it's not good for you, to have your breast touched, or your butt touched for whatever reason for whatever reason or for no reason and you don't have to tell me the reason, then, uh Guess what? You don't have to have your breast touched or your butt touched.
We will find another way to tell the story.
Aah, man.
I was right up on that soap box, wasn't I? - Sorry.
- No.
Please, you're, um I bet people feel really at ease with you.
Thank you.
- Whenever you guys are ready.
- Oh Uh - We can Let's split it.
- Okay.
But I will pay the tip because I drank.
Um, hey, um Think of a card.
All right.
- Yes.
- Got it? - Mm-hmm.
- Now look under your glass.
No, no, no.
Really? I'm very excited.
And is that your card? - Ah - It's not? - I would like to be honest with you.
- No, it's okay.
- Dang it.
It's okay.
That's okay.
- It's not my card, but I wish that it was my card.
Still pretty cool that I got it under there - without you seeing it, right? - Yes! Ta-da! Here you go.
- Hey.
Do you wanna keep hanging out? - Yeah.
- Yeah? - Yeah! - Do you smoke weed? - Yes, I do.
Do you wanna come back to my place? Is that okay? - Yeah.
- Okay.
- It's just over here.
- Okay.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
It's a nun.
I love a nun in New York.
Be cool.
Be cool.
Hello! Good evening! Great.
Creeped out a nun.
Hmm Um Oops, sorry.
- She was beautiful too.
- Yeah.
- But kind of young.
Right? - Mm-hmm.
- I'm just, uh, over here.
- Oh.
Should she have said hello to me? Was that a rude nun? Maybe.
- All right, will you hold on to this? - Yeah.
- Will you hold on to this? - Yes.
Give them a tug.
They don't stretch.
- Very fierce.
- I wanted you to see the muscle.
- Solid.
- I was impressed.
- Here.
Hold this.
- I may have over tugged.
That's okay.
Did you show me this one already? I don't know, man.
Here we go.
Give 'em a blow.
- Was that little? - Give 'em a little blow.
More moist than I expected.
- That was, um, a whole cloud system.
- Watch.
Here we go.
- Wait a minute.
- Even Steven! - Holy shit.
- Wait a minute! - Two.
- Uh-huh.
Bring up the ends.
- Long.
- Jeez.
- Medium - Aah! It defies this realm! Sorry.
You made me scream.
You made me scream at her.
All right, man, well.
I gotta go home.
Gotta let out the dog.
- Have you always had a dog? - No, I just got her.
- Oh my God.
- Fomo.
The dog's name is Fomo? Or are you saying that you wanna be with her right now? No.
She's named after my greatest fear.
You should name all your things after your greatest fear.
- See you later, Kym.
- Bye! - Hey.
Your friend's cool.
- Oh yeah.
See ya later.
- Hey.
- What's up? Aah! - Watch your ass.
- Bastard.
I think I might need your help, now.
- I'm calling a friend.
- How may I help you? - See this area here, where there's table? - Mm-hmm.
I need the pieces - Oh, instead of table.
I see.
- Can you find those for me? - Just give it a Run it up a flagpole.
- I bet this is part of it.
Thank you.
Oh, thank you so much.
Thank you.
Is this Is this what you do with all the girls? You bring them back here to puzzle? You should know that I'm asexual.
You are? I should've told you earlier.
- I take it you're not? - No.
Uh, little joke, but, uh, I am.
How asexual? - Are you ? - Completely.
- There's a spectrum.
- I know.
I know.
I'm sorry.
I I I thought that we were on a date.
No Yeah.
We are.
I mean I hope we are.
So you're not aromantic? - So you know the Uh-huh.
- Yeah.
You know the words.
Um uh No.
I am not aromantic.
And I'm not a virgin, technically, but I do abstain and that's important to me.
- Is that okay? - Oh, my God, yes.
I know Of course it's Is it ? Yes, it's okay.
Of course.
Thank you.
Thank you thank you for sharing who you are with me.
I'm gonna go get another.
Do you want one of these? Yeah.
That'd be great.
Thank you.
- Okay.
- Thanks.
- Want a mint? - Thank you, Kym.
Need anything? No? Want a ChapStick? Need a mint? Need a ChapStick? No? Here you go.
Hi Kym.
Uh, I was just out walking, doing, uh, my cholesterol awareness campaign.
And look who I ran into.
Hi! This is Sister Gertrude.
We, uh Gertrude? Will you say hi to Kym? Hi Kym.
Have a nice day.
And here's Sister Anne.
- Will you say hi? - Hi Kym.
Hi, so that's just a couple of nuns, saying hi to you, and me saying hi to you.
I Googled this convent and waited outside it for a long time.
I'm sorry that I'm late.
- I had to run by the bank.
- That's okay.
- I gotta do one thing.
- Yeah.
- Hey.
- Hey.
You waited on us the other night.
I'm so sorry.
I completely under-tipped you.
I, uh, I just did my math wrong and I fucked it up.
So, um, this is yours.
Oh my God, thank you.
That is so sweet! Oh no.
You're sweet.
I'm sorry.
Let me buy you a drink.
I'll buy you a drink.
We're gonna wait We're gonna wait for a table.
Baby, I'll get you then.
Thank you.
- Hi! - Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
I'm so relieved.
I didn't Ooh, just a little a little awkward.
That's okay.
I thought it was nice.
- Can I move this? - Yeah, yeah.
Here you go.
- How was your day? - Um - Should we? - Uh, no.
- I don't - Hi.
I don't - I don't know why I did that.
- It's okay.
- I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
- You came back.
- Let's sit down.
- I'm sorry, that - It's stupid.
Hey - That's a line for you.
- Um It has been, in the past, but, um Do you hug? Not typically.
Uh but I wanna be respectful.
I like you a lot.
- I like you too.
- But I But If you don't want Like I-I get it, you know.
I-I understand if you I'm really lonely.
Sex has not been We're not gonna get into this right now.
It's not been a great part of my life.
But if If you can't hug me If you can't, um hold me or hold my hand I don't mean that you have to do it now.
I can be patient.
I don Do you think that that's something that you could do? Never did that before.
- You okay? - Yeah.
Mmm Well, maybe we should eat at the bar.
Ah, okay.
This is a really crazy bathroom.
I really wanna try one of those urinals.
I have before, and it it went all over the place.
What the hell are you doing? You're gonna get us kicked out! No, no, you can't smoke in here, honey.
This is it? We're gonna have a fun night, right? Yeah.
Freddie Giordano-Roth? - Oh, my God.
- Hey.
- How's your mom? - Oh
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