I Woke Up A Vampire (2023) s01e07 Episode Script


I knew it.
I knew there was another one.
That was a good call,
Kev, having Dylan come in.
My dad would have lost it
if anything happened
to that dog.
You should have seen him.
tracked the leaves, and bam.
He smelled the dirt,
There's Rainey.
It was a thing of beauty
to watch.
the most cool friend ever.
Dylan is
Besides you, of course.
I understand.
He is cool,
your bestest friend ever. Me.
but he's also hunting
Is he a friend or an enemy?
My new friend is hunting
my old best friend.
Maybe he's using me
to get to you.
is all a part of his plan.
Maybe being nice to me
Maybe he's going to shrink you!
What if we run out of onions?
Kev, I can't do this.
I need to focus.
This is the most consequential
moment in my life.
Everything I've wanted
this entire year
is about to happen,
and it's possible I may see it
happen without me.
Priority check.
A Vampling being hunted
by our new friend
is a little more consequential
than a middle-school musical.
Just saying.
I'm not worried about
He hasn't found me yet.
what is he going to do?
And if he does,
He's my friend.
Having more than one friend
is complicated.
La-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪
Excellent. But always remember,
breathe through your belly.
Thanks, Miss Jordan. Feels good.
You've come a long way
these past few months.
You think I'm good enough
to be the lead?
Ah, one day.
But I am gonna need you
to fill out the chorus
- for this first number.
- Yeah. Whenever.
I know all the dances and
the songs. I'm good.
I know you are, but you still
need to be ready
for any part that may come up.
that is what an understudy does.
I mean,
the tornado in The Wizard of Oz,
When I was understudying
I learned that there are
no small parts. Just
Small actors.
I remember when I was an
Wait. No, I don't.
I've never been an understudy.
Carmie is an integral part
of our production.
I mean, you never know
what could happen.
I guess, but there is nothing
that's going to make me miss
this performance.
I haven't missed one since I was
four, when one of my nemeses
called the fire department
on opening night.
- Nemeses? Plural?
- Wow.
I overachieve in all things.
Yeah. That checks out.
You there.
Get out of my light, please.
I don't sweat. I never sweat.
Why am I sweating?
All right.
Let's mark this.
Chorus, we need to nail this.
for the entire show.
It sets the tone
please take the stage.
Leanna, Benny,
How's the ankle?
Actually, it doesn't matter.
I just don't want you
falling again.
Takes the focus off of me.
All right. Settle.
Five, six, seven, eight.
And slide.
Good, Leanna.
Yes, Benny! Excellent.
This is looking pretty good.
Pretty good?
chorus member number three.
Carmie is crushing
And thank you for shopping at
Hammer and Tong.
We truly appreciate
your patronage.
You're happy today.
my sneaky little friend.
I certainly am,
You, me? Not friends.
Whatever. Look.
I saw a Blended last night.
All I know is
Really? What kind?
I thought you were the expert.
Can't you tell me?
Okay, okay.
Always so serious with you.
That can't be good for
your blood pressure.
It was a Blended.
Yellow eyes,
razor-sharp claws, and teeth
that could snap the arm
off a person.
That could be anybody.
Did you catch it?
What, are you crazy?
It almost killed me.
I barely made it out of there
Besides, catching is your job.
to question your reputation.
Although I'm beginning
I know who it is.
Excellent. Go and get it.
Not that simple.
Yes, it is.
your little shrink-y sticks,
You take
and you put it in a jar.
you find it
You know, you have
a responsibility
the natural world order
to your lineage,
and humanity at large.
She's my friend.
It's a she?
And she is your friend?
You don't have friends.
This is what you do, right?
You move in the darkness.
It was.
Now, I'm not sure.
No. Hunting just doesn't
feel right anymore.
Oh. Isn't that sweet.
"It just doesn't feel right."
Well, perhaps what is right
for someone
for someone else.
can be so wrong
So, why don't you go
and do your job
and think about how right it is
to get me more Blended, hmm?
So, go. You can go.
Or at your own pace.
for the new Meat Man comic?
Hey, Dylan. You here
- What's up with Dylan?
- Who's Dylan?
- The kid that just left.
- Which kid?
you were just speaking with?
The kid
that comes in and out of here.
I can't remember every child
Don't you have a heavy box
to move or something?
Keep it sharp, dancers.
And Leanna, don't don't forget
to look scared, okay?
And townspeople, search.
You are being hunted.
Watch where you're going!
Some of us are trying
to perform here.
Excuse you. I was on my mark.
Showbiz talk for stage position.
Leanna, focus.
I can't work like this,
Miss Jordan.
Wait. No. No stopping, okay?
Keep the energy flowing.
One, two, three, four.
Stop, stop, stop.
Leanna, you missed your light.
It throws everything off
when you do that.
- No. The light guy missed me.
- You can't do that.
Let's just take it from the top.
- We are going to take a five.
- No.
Take a five.
I am free of worry.
I'm at peace, accepting that
I am the best on this stage.
You are killing it.
Really? The dance line covers up
for most of my faults.
I had fun last night.
Fun? Are you kidding?
It was so fun.
It's nice knowing that there's
someone like me. Like us.
a real werewolf last night.
You'll never guess who saw
Werewolf. Low-budget movie star.
Comic nerd.
- The Collector?
- Yes!
- What happened?
- Nothing.
He took one look at me
and fainted.
He was so scared,
a werewolf movie again.
I bet he'll never make
Christoph, listen.
I'm the star, so I'm going to
go through this one more time.
If the spotlight isn't on me,
then the audience can't see me.
And that's a problem.
So, when I move right,
you move left. Got it?
Okay. Let's try this.
Three, two, one.
What did I just say, Christoph?
How are you holding up?
A little anxious.
It's hard not knowing if you're
gonna have to
fill in for someone.
And between me and you,
I could be the lead.
Probably. Maybe. Sure.
Why not? Yeah.
Well, you could always get rid
of her if you drain her blood.
You and the twins.
Not what I do.
And I'm going to get this
with no powers.
Probably for the best.
I don't think they would be
too helpful, anyways.
It's not like singing
at super speed
will make you sound better.
But flying across the stage
a pretty good vampire.
would make me
There's always next year.
Don't worry.
Got some last-minute pickups.
I'm out.
All right.
We have to get this right.
One more time.
Uh, Carmie? We need you in
the chorus.
- Let's go.
- Okay.
Kev, would you drop
what you and Dylan talked about.
Not until you tell me
Why? What does it matter?
I talk to a lot of people.
You open that, you buy it.
You see?
Because Dylan's
He's different.
Oh. Different how?
He's dangerous.
Kev, you read too many comics.
I don't know the kid.
Okay? I told you,
Now, finish the inventory.
things to deal with right now.
I have much more important
What's up with him?
Who can tell? You never know
what he's doing or thinking.
Did they get here yet?
I told you they'd come on time.
tell her to be careful.
And if you see Carmie,
She'll understand.
Have I seen you before?
You look familiar.
In your nightmares.
Do-re-mi fa-so-la-ti-do ♪
I'm fine.
I didn't ask.
Why would anybody ask?
They don't understand.
How could they?
It's impossible to be the person
they expect me to be.
This totally well-adjusted,
talented, giving,
way-above-average intelligence,
beautiful 21st-century person.
They think it's so easy
to be me.
It's just a school musical.
Relax, Leanna.
Maybe to you,
but to me,
every performance is either an
opportunity gained or lost.
Did you know that JoJo Siwa
got her first big break
in her school musical?
No, I didn't.
Well, I'm not sure if it's true,
but what if is?
And what if she said, "Oh, it's
just a middle-school musical.
I'll tell you what.
No big deal"?
You would have zero YouTube
subscribers, and that
brilliant side pony would have
floated off into obscurity.
- Yes, but that's not the point.
- Didn't she cut her hair?
- JoJo showed up.
- Ah.
Pageants and country fairs,
school musicals.
As shall I, and your "Oh, it's
just a middle-school musical"
is my march to greatness.
If I'm great tomorrow,
and I will be,
to bringing hope and joy
then I'm on the path
to millions of kids,
and I refuse to disappoint them.
JoJo didn't.
You're really deep into this.
It's where I live.
looks at me in their judgy way.
It's why everyone
we're intimidated by you?
You know that's because
- What?
- Yes.
You are extremely talented.
We're all out here just trying
to memorize our lines
and not be afraid of
the audience.
So, everybody is scared of me?
My talent?
I wouldn't say "scared,"
but yeah.
And you're not just saying this?
No. I promise. You're scary.
Okay. I feel better now.
Do you really have stage fright?
I thought I could handle it,
I just imagining people
looking at me, watching,
I'm afraid I'm just gonna
freeze and run away.
Just do what I do.
Just take a deep breath
what the character is thinking.
and imagine
and the audience will disappear.
And then, your mind will clear
Wow. That really works?
Obvs. Every time.
Okay. Oh.
I'm good to go.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
We have some
fixing we need to do.
- Yeah.
- Oh.
to test my makeup.
Not a good day
Getting intense in there?
Yeah. Who knew rehearsals
could be so dramatic?
I mean, why have I been
working this hard
for the past few months?
Even if I have to step in
for Leanna,
I don't know if I can do it.
Let's not create hypothetical
problems and try to solve it.
It never works.
You're not wrong.
Oh. You need to be careful.
- Kev wanted me to tell you.
- About?
But anyways, back to you.
Haven't taken the easy way.
You've worked hard.
So, whatever happens, happens.
Just enjoy the ride.
I have no idea what that means,
but thank you.
You will one day.
Check these out.
That is Leanna.
You ready to head back?
If I have to.
What are you and Dylan up to?
Chicken? Ew! Gross.
Bansheean, gigantian, elfings,
Oh, no. Carmie.
Hello, Collector.
Can I help you?
I hope so.
Oh! Ah, oh!
Who are you?
Recognize me now?
Of course.
It's so good to see you.
Of course. Yes.
I wasn't expecting you
until tomorrow.
Did you drink her blood?
Oh, Collector.
Do you have what I'm here for?
No, no, no!
and get your choreo right?
Can you please try
Okay? We have done this
a thousand times.
Excuse me? What set is this?
The well is for the second act.
Has anybody even read
this musical?
I you know what?
I think we could all use
a break,
before we break Miss Jordan.
So, uh, be back in ten.
I don't take breaks.
I know you're back here.
You should have stayed hidden
and not left clues
all over town, like this.
No reason to make this
Now, why would I not
want to make this difficult?
Collector and left claw marks.
And then, you attacked the
You didn't think I'd see those?
Again, Your Shapeshifter-ness,
I wasn't expecting you today.
Things change.
Well, I have one on the way.
It's being captured as we speak.
first thing tomorrow.
You'll have it
And then, I will get to see
my jewel?
I am concerned that I no longer
have any use for you.
Oh, please.
and you will have your Blended,
Just give me one more day
give me back my precious jewel.
and then you will
Don't know exactly
What I did ♪
Except for being who I am ♪
Is it something that I said ♪
Feel like I'm being hunted ♪
This will be hard to explain.
Are you finished?
We're just getting started.
This is your last warning.
Are you okay?
No. What did you see?
I found the jars in your office.
I heard all that crashing,
and I saw that lady in red
vanish into thin air.
What is going on?
You're smarter than you look.
And taller.
Spill it.
What jewel could she have
that makes you collect Blended
for her?
It is my daughter.
That was your daughter?
No. She has my daughter.
I'm just a middleman.
to capture Blendeds
I needed a hunter
to give to the Shapeshifter.
- What is she doing with them?
- I don't know.
It's not my policy to ask.
Besides, I'm too scared.
probably the usual:
But you know,
and take over the world.
turn them evil
Eternal darkness, et cetera,
et cetera.
Wow. My life just gets
weirder and weirder.
I got to go.
- To save a friend.
- Where?
Leanna, what happened?
What is with you two?
I didn't do anything.
She just fainted.
I saw a vampire.
There are five of them on stage.
Yes, honey.
Not them.
She was flying above the stage.
She's crazy sometimes.
I don't know.
opening-night stress, okay?
It's just, uh,
It affects everyone differently.
Let's get you some water.
My voice.
I knew you were
over-rehearsing. Okay.
Okay? Rest up.
Hopefully, you will be fine
by tomorrow, for the show.
But for now, uh, Carmie?
Oh, I can't do this right now.
Now is your time. Good luck.
Yes, you can, okay?
song number three. Benny?
We're starting with
Quiet, everyone.
And begin.
I was so helpless ♪
I was just a child then ♪
The one who's hunting me ♪
Now I'm in love with
See the truth in his eyes ♪
Can we get over all the lies ♪
They call me monster ♪
Call me creature
Of the night ♪
But monsters aren't so scary
In the light ♪
That shines upon you ♪
And there's a light
And no matter what
My head says ♪
My heart speaks true ♪
I see my pictures ♪
And I'm shining ♪
Still can't believe
That I'm flying ♪
So, why am I still crying ♪
I should be saying ♪
Is it because
Don't be scared ♪
Scared of my smile ♪
I know my fangs are sharp ♪
We don't have to hide ♪
Hide in the shadows ♪
We don't have to live
In the dark ♪
Now, that is an understudy.
- Wait. Where are you going?
- I have to go. Bye.
Stage fright.
Career killer.
you are better by tomorrow.
So, uh, well, hopefully,
Everything's fine.
Carmie, are you okay?
No! He got Madison.
Whoa, whoa. Help!
- Let me out!
- You did it.
I can't do this anymore.
I'm done.
Help! Let me out.
Let me out!
I hope I don't have to, either.
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