Insecure (2016) s05e03 Episode Script

Pressure, Okay?!

1 How many times Can we say goodbye Maybe we'll try In another life 'Cause there's nothing left to say, nothing left to say I can't stay awake, waste another day No more chasing love we made for a holiday Mmm-mmm (HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING) Feel like I been runnin' in place Toes on the gas, no brakes Bullshit calling, I'm ignoring Been that nigga, they was snoring Taking risks, I got a lot at stake I don't see no need to play it safe Bullshit calling, I'm ignoring it Been that nigga, they was snoring Snoring Been that nigga Eyes on the prize, keep it goin' Full speed, I ain't never slowing - Good mornin'.
- Good morning.
- Thanks.
See you in there.
- Mm-hm.
SAM: So, we'll leave you with this: "If your house is smart, - "then your clothes should be, too.
" - (APPLAUSE) Thanks so much, guys.
You gave us a lot to think about.
- SAM: Thank you.
Thank you so much for your time, sir.
You got it.
Thank you.
(EXHALES) Is this gonna set my body on fire? JONATHAN: All right, seriously, another smart apparel start-up.
What are we doin'? Anybody want to pursue this? Actually, yeah.
I know they're green, all right? But their sensor technology is advanced.
Plus, I'm impressed by their analytics, and they already have traction in the marketplace, and low overhead.
Okay, Lawrence.
It's yours.
You can let them know.
(DOWN-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING) So, you have a brother.
You have any other siblings? - No.
You? - No.
I don't.
So, Melanie says you're from L.
? Yeah.
I mean, no.
I lived there for like eight years, but I guess yes, but not really.
Okay How are you likin' the city? Uh, it's been cool.
I'm still afraid to use these trolleys.
- (CHUCKLES) Why? - Some of 'em don't have doors.
I could go rollin' down one of these steep-ass hills.
You think you're 'bout to pull a Jack-n-Jill down Lombard? (CHUCKLES) You're lucky you're cute 'cause that's stupid.
- I, uh, I'll take stupid and cute.
- The fuck? - What happened? Um, I guess my baby was just born? (LAUGHS) Oh my god.
Can you imagine? I'm sorry.
I gotta go.
I am so sorry.
Um, here, um this this should cover it.
It was nice to meet you.
): Any available phlebotomist to ER Room Two.
Any available phlebotomist to ER Room Two.
Uh, hey, I'm lookin' for Condola Hayes.
Gimme just a second Nah, I don't have a second.
I just need a room number.
Kathy, I think this one's yours.
- Oh.
- Hey.
I'm Lawrence Walker.
- I'm the father.
- Oh, you're here! Congratulations! You have a healthy, adorable son.
Oh, um, thank you.
Yeah, your little one came earlier than expected, but Mom did great.
Couldn't have gone smoother.
(SOFTLY): Very little tearing.
(CHUCKLES) Right this way.
Um, hi, Lawrence.
Oh, that's why the baby look like that.
CONDOLA: This is my sister and my mom.
And this all happened pretty quickly.
I'm Jackie.
It's so nice to finally meet you.
Yeah, you, too.
LAWRENCE: Um Yeah, how's the little How's little man doin'? Meet Elijah Mustafa.
We named him after our grandfather, Elijah, who invented the first Razr phone.
(LAUGHS) Made it too sharp, though.
Didn't count, but you still gon' be smart, boy.
It's - It's nice.
- KIRA: Mm-hm.
Would you like to hold him? Um Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I would love to.
Of course.
Here we go.
- Careful.
- Thank you.
Yeah, hey.
- Ah, he's got some big ears.
- That's what I said.
And then she had the nerve to act like givin' him my last name was doin' me a favor.
Walker's a good last name.
Who the hell don't want their baby to walk? Speak that shit into existence.
You dig? Yeah.
Oh, thank you.
We talked about baby names, but never anything official.
- Elijah Mustafa.
- Like "The Lion King"? - No.
- That's my shit.
I don't really fuck with the remake, though.
Beyoncé in a movie, I wanna see Beyoncé, ya know? - Are these clothes for the baby? - Shut your ungrateful ass up.
With your small-ass chest, ah! You gon' be there when they cut his little tallywacker, right? I mean, that didn't come up, but hell yeah.
You gotta make sure they don't cut off too much.
Happened to my cousin.
I didn't look, but he told me.
Still a stunnin' nigga, though.
Yeah, man.
It's weird.
I mean Yo, I'm still blessed, but I found out my son was born through a text message.
Her family already actin' like I'm a fuckin' deadbeat.
Deadbeat? Nigga, how? - Lil' man fresh out the poom-poom.
- Exactly! And I'm fuckin' stayin' here instead of over there with him.
This is just not what I planned for my first kid, man.
Everybody got a plan 'til they get punched, my guy.
Box back.
I already told her ass I'm comin' down for the next appointment.
She ain't leavin' me out of shit else.
Let's fuckin' go.
Big Lawrence is a Daddy.
- To Elijah Mufasa.
- Mustafa.
- Mufasa.
- Not funny.
(WHISPERS): Mufasa.
SHI: Okay.
1 pounds and 22 inches.
That is one long baby.
You can go ahead and get his diaper back on.
Um, so, he lost weight? I mean, he's been eating.
I've been feeding him on a schedule.
Wait, um, is there a problem? Is he okay? Nothing to worry about.
Uh, most babies actually lose weight in the first week, but, uh, vitals are strong, and, uh, he should be back up to his fighting weight in a I'd say a week or so.
He's already at his fighting length.
Longest baby of the year over here, am I right? Anyway, uh, how's breastfeeding going? Um, you know, it's Could be better, - but I've been working with an LC.
- Oh, that's great.
Wait, so there's a milk problem? - What's up with the milk? - My milk is fine.
Is there something we should be doing differently? I'm on top of it, Lawrence.
LAWRENCE: I'm just askin' a question.
First one? - Yes.
- DR.
SHI: There's good news.
It gets easier.
(LAUGHS) And, you know, what's most important is that this baby is happy, and healthy, and adorable because I've seen some very ugly babies come through here.
Just so ugly.
Just like hideous, ya know? (LAUGHS) Not your baby.
It's very attractive.
(CLEARS THROAT) You guys are doing great.
You guys are really doing great.
So, I saw, um, all of Jah's appointments were on weekdays.
Is there any way we could make 'em later on Fridays, so I could come down? Uh, well, our doctor's busy, and that's when he's available.
(SOFTLY): Okay.
Can we talk about the baptism, then? My mom keeps asking me about it.
She said if you don't get baptized soon, his soul is gonna spoil like some expired milk.
Well, there's a nice church near me that I sometimes go to when my parents are in town.
So, we're gonna do it there.
So you already planned it? I mean, we're still finalizin' details.
Kira was gonna send you the information.
(SOFTLY): Kira.
Okay, cool.
So, is this how this is gonna be? Is this how what is gonna be? This you just makin' the schedule.
Oh, you mean like I've been doin'? Yeah.
Okay, well, I'm his father.
I feel like I should get some say-so.
Well, what happened to just, "Keep me posted?" (PHONE ALARM SOUNDS) LAWRENCE: That alarm is still terrifyin' for the record.
That's his feed alarm.
Look, I would like to come down every week to see him.
- Does that work for your schedule? - CONDOLA: Oh.
Are you sure? Yeah, I mean, I'm not gonna not be here.
Well, then we'll figure it out.
Okay, cool.
All right, my big guy, see you soon.
Yeaaah, my man.
("ON MY SHIT" BY PHONY PPL PLAYING) (PLANE TAKES OFF) I play the outfield, that's usually Humbly watchin', nope, not today Put a disclaimer out 'Cause I'm on my shit tonight (PLANE TAKES OFF) Before I bless the food, I just wanna remind everyone of Psalm 127, Verse Three, which says, "Children are a gift from the Lord.
" So, as we move forward from this baptism, let us remember that Elijah Mustafa Walker has been gift-wrapped in the most amazing wrappin' paper there is the blood of the Lord and Savior.
- Amen? - ALL: Amen.
Let me just get a quick photo of Elijah, Mommy, and Daddy.
UNCLE RONNIE:Now, this is what I love to see.
A Black father bein' there for his son.
Showin' up.
Doin' it.
LAWRENCE: Thanks, Uncle Ronnie.
That means a lot, man.
Shake my hand, son.
- Oh, blessed me with a five.
- Thank you.
- Hey, you're welcome.
I'm gonna go, uh, check on my parents real quick.
They call what we did earlier a baptism? It was just a couple droplets.
I guess his forehead is saved, but what about the rest of him? Condola had already made plans, so Oh, so she made an Evite, and you gave up on your baby's soul.
- Mom - I'm gonna take him to Pastor Clarke - for a full dip.
- (LAUGHING) LAWRENCE: Hey, what y'all laughin' about? - How's my son doin'? - He could use a little nap.
A nap sounds good right about now.
Oh yeah, I'm sure you're so tired.
Yeah, I saw him eatin' them cheese quiches earlier.
You know, dairy always wears out a Walker.
Uh, you know what, I was just, uh, thinkin' about the holidays.
Wouldn't it be fun if we all got together again? You know, your family could spend some time with Jah, and then my side.
I could take him off your hands for a week.
- He'll be old enough by then.
- Oh, a week? - Yeah.
- That's like a year.
Nah, it's it's actually a week.
I mean, we could talk about it as it gets closer.
- We can check back in.
- Okay, cool.
Yeah, 'cause, you know, I want my parents to spend some time with him, too.
My dad wants to teach him how to swim.
He thinks he's got floater's feet.
Yeah, yeah.
Just toss him in the deep end.
It's the only way to find out.
(SOFTLY): Uncle Ronnie, Uncle Ronnie.
Yeah, come here for a second.
You need another five dollars? (PLANE TAKES OFF) Guys, a fight over office space can't be what breaks us.
So what it's not in the city? I think you're still gonna love it.
Man (ON PHONE): You're right.
We'll make it work.
That's what I like to hear.
Let's sign the lease tomorrow.
Give me a call if you guys have any questions.
I'm here anytime.
Appreciate it.
- All right, bye.
- All right, take care.
(PHONE DINGS) (EXHALES) (PHONE DINGS) Let's show Mama, let's show Mama, aye! Look, Mama, I belong to the streets now.
Aye, oh, pop it, pop it.
- Are you all right? - Yeah, I'm fine.
I just I know you already hate him.
Are you serious? (SUCKS TEETH) Ashy Larry strikes again.
He said he had to work.
Well, who can work these kinks out my neck, okay? - 'Cause he ruined our massage day.
- I know.
And I was really lookin' forward to Big Hands Kyle.
- And his thick thumbs.
- The way that Lawrence can just pop in every couple of hours and play peek-a-boo, then split, girl? He ain't nothin' but an uncle.
- Kira.
- No, I'm serious.
You better than me because, girl, I would go the fuck off.
I bust windows.
We already know about that one situation.
It's okay.
I will just have to reschedule for 18 years from now.
Girl, shut up.
You go and I'll watch Eli.
We gotta practice his Crip Walk anyway.
Ain't that right? When I talk do you listen up? You don't understand me And you walk when you used to run You might as well be standing And if you wanna make it count it's all night or nothin' (LULLABY PLAYS FROM TOY) Crying wolf 'cause the moon is out You're losin' all your merit How you look versus what you are I don't see resemblance And if you wanna make it count it's all night or nothin' And if you wanna make it count it's all night or nothin' (PLANE TAKES OFF) (FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING) Wow.
KELLI: I know, right? Shrimp does taste better cold.
- Oh, one second.
- Hey, Kel.
What's good? Wow, Lawrence and Condola.
- Hi.
- Hey! And that is a full baby with both your faces.
Well, welcome to the celebration of Simone.
Thank you.
And I am living for this lady tux.
- Oh, well, thank you.
- Well, you haven't seen the best part.
Oh my gosh.
Y'all match? Too cute.
Her obsession with my child is unsettling, but, you know, free babysitting.
Hey, y'all got Peppa Pig? No, no, no.
That's Pepper Pig with a hard "R.
" You know, there was copyright issues, and the snout's a little off, but that's my cousin Tyrell up in there Tyrell! Get off your phone, okay? You gotta suspend the children's disbelief.
- C'mon! - Condola, let me show you where you can put your things.
- Kelli.
- Lawrence.
- It's been a minute.
- Yeah.
Everything Everything good? Oh, me? I'm good.
You might've heard I died nine months ago, but - Wait, what? - She didn't.
I came back just like Daft Punk.
- Better.
- She quit drinkin'.
Okay, cool.
That's good for you.
- Thank you.
And how's everybody else? Everyone I associate with is thriving.
In abundance Limitless.
Okay, cool.
That's That's great to hear.
(FEEDBACK SQUEALS) All right, y'all.
Gather 'round.
Gather 'round.
I, myself, may not be partaking, but by all means, grab an adult boisson, and join me in a toast.
Now, I don't like children.
I never have.
Their small features and stilted movements remind me of tiny demons.
But not Simone.
This little girl means so, so much to me.
Baby girl's gonna be a force when she grows up.
And I am so proud to be her Godmother.
Happy Birthday, Simone, an angel amongst demons.
- Cheers.
- ALL: Cheers.
Oh, he's hungry.
Let me get him.
No, no, no.
I got it.
- Are you sure? - I got it.
Yeah, yeah.
- KELLI: There she is.
- Say "Thank you, Auntie Kelli.
" Hey! Hi.
Let's go eat.
Let's go eat.
- Say bye-bye.
- Bye-bye.
KELLI: It's called Sympathetic Lactating.
I can't help it.
She's around me.
I have to feed her.
I think Pepper Pig might be roasting.
KELLI: Son of a Tyrell! - Are you serious? - TYRELL: What up, cousin? Come smoke with me.
Nigga, you know I'm already high.
Little man was hungry.
Look at that smile.
What's that on his face? Oh, um, gave him somethin' off the kids' snack table.
Really just an assortment of mushes, but he loved it.
What? We we haven't introduced solids yet.
Okay, well, you know, the doctor said we can do it anytime after four months, so.
Right, but I decided to wait.
There's a way to introduce new foods.
What if he was allergic? Oh, is it that deep? He's fine and now we know that he loves carrots.
You should've checked in with me, Lawrence.
Why are you being so dramatic? Why is Mommy being so dramatic? Why? Is this funny to you? No, I did it, it happened, and he's fine.
- Give me my baby.
- Can you calm down? - Just give me - Can you just calm down? (SHOUTS): Can you just calm down?! CONDOLA: Give me the baby.
Hey, bruh.
Can you help me move some boxes real quick? - Hey, buddy.
- Hey, baby.
(SIGHS) Where these boxes at, bruh? Oh, ain't no boxes, bruh.
Bro, I'm tired of her bullshit, man.
Tryna make me look like I'm a bad father in front of everybody? C'mon, she's always on some petty, controllin' bullshit.
And? So you gotta act out? I promise you, this is not how you wanna do things.
Bruh, I am tired of her acting like she's the only parent, like she's the only one who can take care of him.
This is all too negative.
You know, Elijah can feel that energy.
Y'all need to learn to communicate.
I mean, Tiff and I had our issues, but we we had to decide to be a team.
Y'all are married, all right? Our situations are not the same.
There's niggas out here not even tryin' to take care of their kids, and I'm here, all right? I'm doin' everything I can to make this shit work, - and it's never good enough.
- Okay, look, I hear you, but I I promise you the last thing you wanna be doin' is addin' stress to the situation.
All right, whatever, man.
I'll I'll figure it out.
Yeah, I know you will.
Now, let's get back to my baby's party before Pepper Pig turns my house into "Pineapple Express.
" That's what's happenin' right now.
You wanna see your baby high? ("HOME" BY IYAMAH PLAYING) Yeah Home It don't have to be a physical place Or a familiar face Somewhere that you feel safe And can escape when you wanna be alone, uh Home, yeah-eah You can find it wherever you are, oh Where we sit with the birds Nature or nurture, it's hers Yeah, it's bigger than us You belong to me Then I think 'bout the girl All she wanted was to save the world But it's got to start within (SCREAMING) And now I'm home Got the keys to my own door And I take them where I go Oh-oh, I set the tone I set the code for home I got the keys to my own door And I take them where I go Oh, I, I set the tone And the code for home Home, home Oh, still, I'm searching for Security and honesty The balance of it all and everything I want to free all of my forgotten dreams I lost it all so suddenly Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah 'Cause structure, stability, it's Bigger than the eyes can see - (ELIJAH CRYING) - I know.
I know.
- (KNOCKS AT DOOR) - It's open! - (DOOR OPENS) - I know! - (CONTINUES CRYING) - CONDOLA: Yeah.
Aw, what's wrong, Jah? Huh? Whatchu upset about today? He's okay.
It's just his fussy hour.
Aw, what's wrong? You mad Daddy a little late? Huh? You ready to go? Yo, you got his bag packed? Yeah, but what about the car seat? I got the one you told me to.
It's installed in the rental.
We're good to go.
I know.
- It's okay.
It's okay.
- Here, let me hold him for a second.
- Nah, I got it.
- Just let me have him.
- I can calm him down a little quicker.
- Okay! - I've only had him for two seconds.
- I know.
Come here.
Come here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know, I don't think this is a good idea.
Wait, what? What is that supposed to mean? I mean, him staying overnight in a strange, new place.
I don't think that's a good idea.
What're you talkin' about? We talked about this.
It's walking distance.
I know, but I'm just not comfortable with him going with you when he's like this.
Jesus Christ, why do you keep actin' like I can't handle this.
What is wrong with you? I don't trust you! Are you fuckin' serious? Condola, stop actin' like I'm a fuckin' stranger.
- I'm his father.
- And you're barely ever here.
And you never check in.
Not about his swimming, or food, and you don't even give me more than three hours' notice when you're not coming.
I have a job, okay? I check in when I can.
But what if we needed something? Like the time I had to ask Tiffany to take - me and Eli to urgent care.
- What the hell? Why didn't you tell me that? I could've What were you gonna do? Not fly down on a Tuesday? You get to come in and play "part-time, good Dad" after I've already fixed everything.
All right, look, I'm tryin' here, okay? - This shit is hard for me, too.
- Oh, really? - Yeah.
- What part is hard for you? All the free time, or the full night's sleep? - Which part? - Shut up! You never talk to me.
You never even pretended to give me a chance.
I gave you a chance, and you moved away! Yeah, to take a job I already had.
Before you blew my life up! - Blew your life up? - Yeah.
You are not a fucking victim, Lawrence.
Well, you made a decision without me, and now you're trying to use it as an excuse to keep him from me.
Wow, you know what? This half-in, half-out shit.
It isn't working for me.
- He's not going with you.
- (ELIJAH CRIES) - Give me my son.
- No! I'm tired of this, all right? I'm not doin' this with you anymore.
We don't have to talk.
But just know I'mma do whatever it takes to get my son with or without you.
What did you just say? You heard me.
Get the fuck outta my house! - (TURBULENCE) - (DINGS) CAPTAIN: So sorry, but we have to discontinue our drink service.
We are hitting a bit of turbulence.
Flight attendants, please take your seats.
(BABY CRYING) (DINGS) (BABY CONTINUES CRYING) ("BLURRED LINES" BY JOYCE WRICE PLAYING) How is it supposed to feel Whatever happens, let it happen Just gotta look out for attachment Why fix what ain't broken It won't make no sense anyway What are we trying to say What if we do what comes to mind And whatever we're trying to say Hope it don't blur these Lines (PHONE BUZZING) Hey.
I'm I'm sorry.
You're right.
This isn't working.
No it's not.
So What do we do? ("SATELLITE" BY THUNDERCAT PLAYING) If I could fly I'd stay in the sky And never come down For no one or nothing My wings would be huge I could see for miles To endless planets Distant galaxies No stress No strife Just peace of mind Space waves Solar flares Everything's Gonna be all right All right All right All right Everything's gonna be I think that might be Nathan's group over there.
Maybe just, like, I don't know, easy into it.
Take your time.
I should ask him what my tears taste like.
(BEACH DIN) I know they salty.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC) (SCREAMING) Would it be a trip if I started dating your girl's girl? She's not my girl.
She's all over the place.
(PHONE CHIMES) Are you kidding me? Now I'm a fraud? You know I can buzz down on him.
I'm in the hive.
It's time to finally end this.
We're having a breakthrough, y'all.
I think we gon' need some more taquitos.
More taquitos please.
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