Knight Squad (2018) s01e05 Episode Script

The Dork Knight Returns

1 Hey hey hey Hey hey Whoa, what about this location, Arc? Pretty perfect, don't you think? Ah, I don't know.
Does this clearing really say "Team Portrait"? It says we've been walking for hours pick a spot.
Hey, cut my boy a break.
But, seriously, pick a spot.
Guys, come on.
This portrait means a lot to Arc.
He's never been part of a team before.
Yeah, before knight school, I was just a handsome lone wolf.
[howling.]
I hope that howl means you like this spot.
All right, I suppose this place will have to do.
Nah, there's a weird boulder.
Not for long.
[roaring.]
[thunderous crash.]
[gaseous explosion.]
[wind gusting.]
- Oh! - Oh! Oh [coughing.]
That must be the Lost Cave of Farts.
I think I know why they lost it.
Yeah.
Let's get outta here.
Unh-unh, hold your breath! Lou, pick up your brush and paint like the wind.
Fine, but let's all remember the team pose we agreed on.
- Why did we agree to this? - Shhhh! Smile.
I can taste the smell.
I can't believe it! [gasping.]
I'm free! ALL: Jimbo? ARC: Ahhh! [heavy thud.]
Guys, is it really you? You guys know this filthy skunk boy? He's our old Phoenix Squad teammate.
Squad hugs! Oh! We'll hug after you shower.
[magic whooshing.]
[swords clanging.]
FIZZ: Sir Gareth! Get your hands off my boss! Uh-uh-uh-uh! Relax, Fizz.
I have a tooth that needs to come out.
But it's no big deal once you've lost an eye, and a hand, and a butt cheek.
Then why are you tied down? Well, whenever someone's about to cause me pain, my my battle instincts kick in.
I've beaten up every dentist in Astoria except except for him.
Get in there, doc.
Ahhhh [roaring.]
Give my love to Surly and the twins.
Oh! He was my last hope.
- Don't worry, I'll help you.
- I don't want your help.
That's your nasty tooth talkin'.
Aw, training yard! Give Jimbo a hug! Poor guy.
Being trapped in that cave for so long must've really messed with his mind.
Actually, he's always been a little weird.
Did he always eat rocks? [chomps.]
Mmmm! Crunchy! No, that's new.
Oh! Jimbo! Is that you? No, it's me, Buttercup.
That is Jimbo! Yes! I told the king I didn't lose another student.
Wait, now, how many students have you lost? Buh-buh-buh-buh- buh-buh-buh-buh.
Jimbo, it's been months.
What happened to you? I was frolicking through the woods, picking fruit for a pie, when I slipped and rolled down a hill into a cave.
Then a rockslide trapped me in.
Ha! Yeah, no, I mean, ha! How long did you look for me, Phoenix fam? We searched every day for weeks.
We left no stone unturned except for that big stone you were trapped behind.
I even went into Giant Town to make sure that nobody accidentally ate you.
It happens.
Eventually, we figured you'd left to follow your dreams of becoming a baker.
Nope, I was just suffering alone in a really stinky cave.
Ha! It just keeps getting better and better.
[laughing.]
I survived with my can-do attitude and the help of my best friend, Shielda.
Suddenly, eating rocks doesn't seem so strange.
Well, students, it is my pleasure to officially welcome Jimbo back into Phoenix Squad.
ALL: [cheering, applauding.]
Now we have five members.
Oh, what's that, Buttercup? Knight school rules state that a squad can only have four members.
No, I said, squirrels love hugs.
[giggling.]
Oh.
Sage is correct.
A squad can only have four members.
Tough break, Jimbo.
Well, at least you still have Shielda.
Actually, since Jimbo was in Phoenix Squad, first, he's in, you're out.
I'm no longer a member of Phoenix Squad? - What? - No.
Why? We all know I'm gonna say, ha, right? Ha! Oh oh oh oh Oh oh oh, hey! Oh oh oh oh Oh oh oh oh oh Oh oh oh oh Hey! Oh oh oh oh oh Oh oh oh oh Oh oh Hey! Oh, we will be heroes We are the Knight Squad Hey! Na na na na Na na na na, hey I'll miss you, Phoenix Squad Room, especially you, foosball table.
[knob snaps.]
I'll just say Jimbo did it.
- Hey, Arc! - Jimbo did it! We were looking everywhere for you.
I'm just saying bye to the Squad Room.
Now that I'm not on Phoenix Squad, I won't be able to hang out here anymore.
There's gotta be a loophole in the rules.
Bookshelf, macro rulebook.
- [book thuds.]
- [grunts.]
I'm gonna miss that.
Arc, you can't go.
You're still one of us and a team doesn't give up on each another.
PRUDENCE & WARWICK: Yeah! Before you came, we were in last place.
Now we're unstoppable.
PRUDENCE & WARWICK: Yeah! And we're gonna do whatever it takes to get you back on this squad.
PRUDENCE & WARWICK: Yeah! Wait.
How? We'll come up with something.
Just hang tight and please don't do anything crazy.
When have I ever done anything crazy? You stole that witch's broom.
You started that cat rodeo.
You gave an ogre a wedgie.
I get your point.
I promise I won't do anything else crazy.
But, for the record, that ogre gave me a wedgie, first.
[magic whooshing.]
Mmmm! Floor donut.
Mmmmm! Oh, what's tied around my tooth? Time's up, toothy! [grunting.]
[small thud.]
Sorry, Fizz.
I told you my battle instincts are just too strong.
Stop trying to help me.
Don't worry, sir, me and that tooth are just starting to tango.
Oh oh oh Ah ah ah ah ah Okay, according to the rulebook there's only one way to get Arc back on Phoenix Squad.
We have to convince Jimbo to quit.
Ooh, maybe he'll do what we say, if I hold him upside down over a cliff.
Or since he loves baking more than being a knight, maybe we can convince him he's best at it, and he'll quit to become a baker.
And if he doesn't, then Prudy will We're not holding anyone over a cliff.
- Hey, guys! - He's coming.
Be nice.
WARWICK, PRUDENCE, CIARA: Hi, Jimbo.
What have you got there? I know I'm supposed to be practicing my attack moves, but Shielda asked me to bake you guys some muffins.
Mmmm! Oh, my goblin, Jimbo.
So yummy! Right, guys? Yeah, these muffins are so good.
You have a gift.
Have you ever thought about quitting knight school and becoming a baker, because you should.
Do you really think they're that good? - Oh, yeah.
- Totally.
You're the best.
He's the best? Jimbo, you're amazing.
I mean, no one can do what you do.
Arc didn't bake you guys delicious muffins? Arc who? Arc me.
- Hey! - [gasps.]
Wow, they moved on fast, huh? It's like you were never even there.
That's not what's happening, all right? Ciara just said they're figuring out a way to get me back on Phoenix Squad.
Oh, really? Then why are they doing the muffin dance with Jimbo? Muffin dance Muffin dance, yeah Boy you better bake what your mama gave you - I can't believe this.
- Muffin dance How is that supposed to get me back on the squad? They must have changed their mind and picked Jimbo over you.
[giggling.]
And they picked his steel friend over you, too.
[giggling.]
How am I supposed to compete with that foxy shield? Here's a crazy idea.
Kraken Squad's looking for a fourth member.
Kripan just quit, didn't you? [hissing.]
Why would I ever join your squad? Because, if you become a Kraken, we'll be the best squad ever.
Even though I miss being part of a team, I wouldn't join you in a million years.
Thanks for believing in my dream.
Squad hug? I showered.
Now you're trapped inside the Cave of Hearts.
That does it! I'm joining Kraken Squad.
Yes! - Squad hug! - We're not huggers.
Oh oh oh, ah ah ah ah [dramatic music.]
Arc, today you will be joining Kraken Squad.
Are you ready for your initiation? I was before you said it like that.
Buttercup, release the kraken! Wait.
The kraken's in that little bucket? look at you and your itty-bitty adorable Ah! The baby kraken slapped Arc in the face.
[giggles.]
That means she likes you.
Arc, you're a Kraken now? He will be, after the flaming spears ceremony.
We'll call you when the spears are hot and pokey.
Arc, what are you doing? Well, since you guys are so happy with Jimbo, I decided to move on, too.
Yay, Arc has a new team.
Someone's getting a kraken cake.
Did my best friend just become a Kraken? Oh, give me that bucket.
I think I'm gonna puke.
Whoa, that hit you hard.
Does it hurt? Of course, it hurts.
Arc, I told you to wait and not do anything crazy.
Hello! Joining the Kraken Squad is like taking the crazy cart to Crazy Town.
Well, I only did that because you ditched me for Jimbo.
That's right, I saw your muffin dance.
Muffin dance, muffin dance It's really catchy.
- Arc, we can explain.
- Save it.
You guys made your choice and I made mine.
I'm better off with the Krakens.
They may slap you in the face, but at least they don't stab you in the back.
That was a slap, not a stab.
Fizz! Are you here? You are not going to get my tooth.
I'm a knight.
You cannot sneak up on me.
But my horse can! Charge! Oh! Oh! [objects clattering.]
Did we get it, Tea Biscuit? [groans.]
[magic whooshing.]
Guys, I'm just here to get my stuff.
Oh, and, uh, grab my ribs I left here labelled, um "Prudy's snack.
Keep away.
" JIMBO: [laughing.]
Ah, Shielda, today is a fantabulous day.
The sun is shining, the oven is pre-heated, for revenge! Phoenix Squad is gonna be sorry they stopped looking for us.
[muffled.]
That's not cool! What? I said, not cool.
Wow, that cave really did mess with your head.
Oh, yeah, you try eating rocks for ten months.
What are you gonna do to the Phoenix Squad? Well, I was gonna knock them out with this sleeping sulphur I brought from the Cave of Farts, but you'll do.
[bottle shatters.]
Well, it looks like your little gas trick didn't work.
[snoring, heavy thud.]
[giggling.]
I know, Shielda.
That did work really well.
Ah ah ah ah ah [dramatic music.]
[liquid bubbling.]
Oh, what's that stench? That's the funk of your new home.
Welcome to the Cave of Farts! ["farts" echoing.]
I'm not gonna let you get away with this.
- [gas releasing.]
- Oh! Oh! Wow! [coughing.]
What did this cave eat last night? Don't worry.
You don't be a Lonely Larry for much longer.
What do you mean? By now, Phoenix Squad should have found the note I left them saying that I took you captive, and to come alone.
I left them with a freshly-baked nut cake.
Trust me, they're not coming for me.
I bet you a million gold pieces they don't show up here.
We're here! We never shook on it.
Unchain Arc.
He's part of the Phoenix Squad.
That's right.
Also, who ate my ribs?! Zip it! You left me trapped in this stinky cave, and I'm gonna do the same to you.
You got yourself trapped when your berry-picking butt fell down the hill.
Excuse me for wanting to use fresh ingredients.
Dude, we didn't know you were in here.
No one's gonna know you're in here, either.
- [sword clanks.]
- [whimpers.]
Warwick, use your magic to break Arc's chain.
On it.
Achy breaky, chainy chain! [magic whooshing.]
Hey! Magic is hard, guys.
Enough! Get them, Shielda! [thunderous rumbling.]
All right, Shielda, that's our cue to leave.
Smell ya later.
Prudy, grab Arc and let's get outta this cave! [boulders crashing.]
Or get comfy because now we're stuck.
All right, I'm just gonna say it.
Shielda kind of a jerk.
Na na na Na na na na na na Na Ah, Fizz! Fizz? What's all that? I let you down, so, I'm quitting and cleaning out my office.
You don't have an office.
What's why my box is empty.
Well, I'm sorry to see you go.
And I'm sorry you're so easy to trick.
Huh? [screaming.]
Now gimme that tooth! Ah! I thought you gave up! Never! BOTH: [grunting, straining.]
Ahhhh! You're biting me! I'm sorry, Fizz, it's my battle instincts.
I didn't mean to bite you.
You didn't bite me.
You bit this.
- Is that your armor? - Yep.
Here's your tooth.
You used my battle instincts against me to defeat my tooth? That's right.
You got Fizz whizzed.
Well done.
And and thank you.
You're welcome.
Now about my office Don't make me bite you again! Ah! [magic whooshing.]
- [roaring.]
- [chain snaps.]
Thanks.
And, uh, I'm so sorry Jimbo ate your ribs.
Hey, maybe Prudy can smash through the rocks with her hammer.
No, wait, this place is too unstable.
We could end up crushed.
The only way out is through that hole in the ceiling.
Luckily, the Wicks are known for their jumpin' skills.
Freedom! Yeah! Jumping is hard, guys.
You guys shouldn't have come to rescue me.
Now we're all trapped.
Of course, we came for you.
We're a team.
Then why did you let Jimbo into your Cave of Hearts? Well, we were just buttering him up to convince him to quit knight school.
Buttering up because he's a baker.
[laughing.]
Classic Ciara.
I'm sorry, guys.
I guess I'm still getting used to this whole team thing.
Well, none of this will matter, if we don't find a way out of this cave.
[gas releasing.]
ALL: [groaning.]
Oh, come on, cave.
Hold it in.
Wait, that's it! Prudy, lift that boulder and put it over the geyser.
Got it! [roaring.]
[boulder thuds.]
[small farts throughout cave.]
The pressure's building.
This is bad.
No, it's just what we need.
Yeah, combining the power of the rock and the power of the, uh I have no idea what the plan is.
Keep talking.
If enough pressure builds, it will launch it through the hole in the ceiling.
Exactly! No, that's exactly what my plan would have been, if I'd thought of it.
Everyone, get on the boulder.
[thunderous rumbling continues.]
[small farts throughout cave.]
It's gonna blow, in three, two, one! One! [rumbling, farting stops.]
One? Hm, I guess it's not gonna ALL: [screaming.]
[magic whooshing.]
And that is why you do not high-five a falcon.
Just fist bump.
Got it! Jimbo, where's the rest of the Phoenix Squad? I have horrible news.
They were lost in a freak accident with their friend Arc.
On the bright side, I made popovers.
Arc's gone? Oh, well.
Kripan! Back in.
Yes! PHOENIX SQUAD: [screaming.]
[boulder crashes.]
Arc is back? Kripan! You're back out.
Phoenix Squad, what is going on? Jimbo tried to trap us in the Cave of Farts.
No, I left you to rot in the Cave of Farts.
Did you get a popover? Guards, grab him! There's no place in knight school for a student who locks other students in a smelly cave.
[clears throat.]
Now what about like a regular cave, like just No cave! Guards, take him to the dungeon.
But, uh, leave leave the popovers.
I'll handle these.
So, does this mean Arc can rejoin the Phoenix Squad? Only if he quits Kraken Squad.
PRUDENCE, CIARA, WARWICK: He quits! What they said.
[roars.]
Kripan! KRIPAN: [sobbing.]
Yes? Stop crying.
You're back in again.
KRIPAN: Yeah! I think this belongs to you.
And so does this.
Squad hug! Ah, so this is the Cave of Hearts.
We should probably all shower.
- Yeah.
- You're right.
Hey hey hey
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