Konosuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World! (2016) s01e05 Episode Script

Kono Maken ni Onedan o!

This money is meaningless.
Feeling satisfied with just a few coins,
and taking care of a useless goddess.
The is not the different
world life I wished for!
Fighting ferocious dragons
with a cursed or holy sword,
being lauded as a chosen hero,
and love blossoming with a party member,
isn't that how it's supposed to be?
Red rover!
I have had all I can
take of living in debt!
A quest!
Thanks to Dullahan, there are only
tough ones left, but let's accept one!
I want money!
I don't mind.
I'm sick of working part-time
in the shopping district!
The manager yells at me if
any croquettes aren't sold!
I will work hard! I'll give it
everything I've got this time!
This is a pitiful
self-proclaimed goddess.
I'm sure I'll also run out of
money eventually,
so go find a decent-looking quest for us.
Got it!
Will Aqua be all right?
I feel that she will
take on some insane quest.
I would be fine with
an unreasonable quest!
All right.
That's not all right!
What are you trying to accept?
There is a place where a manticore and
a griffin are fighting over territory.
Please kill both of them.
The reward is 500,000 Eris.
Are you crazy?
I am right to come check on her.
I nearly let her accept
a ridiculously high-level quest!
Hey, check this one out!
The quality of the lake water
in the town has declined,
and brutal alligators
have started to live in it,
so I would like to
have the water purified.
The monsters will
move to a different habitat
if the lake is purified,
so there is no need to kill them.
The reward is 300,000 Eris.
This quest is perfect for me!
God's Blessing on This Wonderful World!)
(Episode 5: A Price for This Magic Sword!)
How about it?
Are you actually capable
of purifying the water?
You fool, who do you think I am?
Surely you can learn about my role
from my name and appearance.
Goddess of party tricks, right?
No, you shut-in NEET!
Don't you see the beautiful
water-colored eyes and hair?
Go ahead and accept it then.
If you accept it alone, you can
keep the whole reward for yourself.
Well, monsters are likely to
attack while I'm purifying the water.
So, I would like you to protect me.
So it is.
How long will it take? About 5 minutes?
About half a day?
That's too long!
Please, I'm begging you!
Help me out, Mr. Kazuma!
How will you purify it anyway?
Well, for a goddess of my class,
I can purify the water
by simply touching it.
I see.
Hey, Aqua.
I think I know a way
for you to purify the lake safely.
Hey, are we really doing this?
My strategy is so reliable.
Why are you unsatisfied with it?
I look like a rare and captured
monster that is on its way to be sold.
By no means do we come here
to abandon this worthless goddess
in the lake.
She will be able to touch and purify
the water from inside the safe cage.
Aqua! Tell us if anything happens!
We will reel you and cage in!
I look like a teabag of black tea
being made into soup stock.
312 iron bars, 313 iron bars.
No monsters are showing up.
It seems that way.
You are being awfully reserved today.
Normally, you would say
something silly
and try to blow the
monsters and lake away.
That's true.
What sort of impression
do you both have of me?
My ultimate explosion
magic isn't to be used
on the likes of mere alligators.
You always fire it off all
over the place for no reason.
Hey, Aqua! How is
purifying the lake going?
It's going well!
You will catch a cold
if you're in the water for too long!
If you need to go to the bathroom,
let us know!
Arch priests don't go to the bathroom!
It sounds like she is doing fine.
By the way, crimson demons
don't go to the bathroom either.
You used to be idols or something?
Me too.
I'm a crusader, so I don't
Darkness, don't try so hard to deny it.
Megumin and Aqua insist
they don't go to the bathroom,
so next time we'll accept a
quest that will take longer
than a day and we'll see
whether they go to the bathroom or not.
Please don't do that!
Crimson demons really
don't go to the bathroom, okay?
But I will apologize,
so please don't do that.
He proved to be the man I appreciate.
The alligators aren't still coming.
It would be great
if things end up peacefully.
Hey, that line has been
bound to trigger a flag!
Something is coming! Hey,
a lot of them are coming!
Since the alligators show up,
Aqua is not only using her
godly purification ability,
but also purification magic
as if her life depends on it.
The cage! The cage
is making a strange sound!
Aqua, let us know if you want to give up!
We will pull the cage in
by the chain and run away!
No way! I won't get my
reward if I give up now!
It just went crack!
The cage just made a sound
no cage should ever make!
It looks kind of fun inside that cage.
You shall not go.
It seems that
the purification is complete.
All of the alligators
appear to have left too.
Aqua, are you okay?
Hey, Aqua.
Miss Aqua.
Hey, I'm talking to you!
What's wrong?
If that is enough to make you
cry, you should have given up.
Okay, let's go back.
Hey, Aqua.
As we talked it over, we don't
need any reward for this.
That's right, Aqua.
All 300,000 Eris is yours.
Yes, that's right.
Aqua did all the
work this time after all!
Come on, get out of the cage.
The alligators are gone.
Just take me back like this.
What did you say?
The world outside this cage is scary.
Take me back to the village like this.
It looks like this quest
traumatized Aqua again.
Is that the Legendary Ancient Dragon?
Can we beat that thing?
Maybe we should run away.
My name is Mitsurugi Kyouya.
I was the sort of ordinary high
schooler you could find anywhere,
but in the abyss of death,
I met a lovely goddess,
and was reincarnated into
this world as a chosen hero.
If we let this dragon run rampant,
many people could be
injured or lose their lives.
We are the only ones who can defeat it!
The sacred treasure is said to be created
by the gods, and only Kyouya can wield it.
The Cursed Sword, Gram!
That's my Kyouya!
Only he can defeat the
Ancient Dragon in a single blow!
When did he become yours?
Hey, stop that.
Kyouya is mine!
What are you talking about?
Kyouya is mine, okay?
I will save this world without fail.
I made a promise to her.
depart on your journey with
the Cursed Sword, Gram,
the chosen hero.
Lady Goddess.
I will slay the Devil King
and save the world for you.
Okay, I expect great things of you.
A used up goddess is
being transported along
I have heard this voice before!
Kyouya, where are you going?
I'm sure they are taking
me away to be sold
Lady Goddess!
I'm sure they are taking
me away to be sold
Hey, Aqua, we are in the village now,
so stop singing that song.
Just transporting a woman on
her knees in a beat-up cage
is already drawing everyone's attention.
In fact, you should get out of there!
This cage is my sanctuary.
The outside world is too scary,
so I won't come out for a while.
She is completely
hold herself up in there.
She is just like I used to be.
Oh, nothing.
Lady Goddess!
You are Lady Goddess, aren't you?
What are you doing
in such a place, Lady Goddess?
Don't touch my ally so freely.
Who are you?
You know him, don't you?
He was calling you a goddess.
Just do something!
That's right! I am a goddess!
She didn't seriously forget
she is a goddess, did she?
What is it you want to see me about?
Who are you?
It's me, Mitsurugi Kyouya!
The Mitsurugi Kyouya who
received this Cursed Sword,
Gram, from you and was
reincarnated into this world!
Oh, of course! That guy!
Sorry, I totally forgot it!
I've sent along a lot of people,
so it's inevitable that
I would forget someone!
It has been a while, Master Aqua.
I have been working hard
every day as your chosen hero.
By the way, Master Aqua, why
have you been locked up in a cage?
Because she didn't want
to come out of the cage.
You dragged the goddess to this world?
Then you locked her in a cage
and dunked her into a lake?
What the heck were you thinking?
I have lots of fun every day,
and I'm not upset about
being dragged here anymore.
Master Aqua, I don't know
how this man won you over,
but you are a goddess!
And yet, this little
This jerk just says whatever he wants.
He doesn't even know Aqua all that well!
What? Fighting over a woman?
By the way, where are you
staying right now, Master Aqua?
Horse stable.
Hey, take your hands off him!
Is there no limit to your rudeness?
He is kind of making me
want to blow him up.
Don't do that, I will die too.
You both are crusader and arch mage?
I see. You are blessed with
wonderful party members.
You have such excellent people here,
but you make Master Aqua
sleep in a horse stable.
Don't you feel ashamed?
I'm sure this guy has lived a
life free of worry with that
Cursed Sword, Gram, so that he got
as a perk when reincarnating.
I worked my way up from square one,
so why must I get
lectured by a guy like him?
Besides, these girls are excellent?
I have
never once
seen the slightest
glimpse of
All of you should travel with me,
a sword master, from now on.
I will even buy you full sets
of high-grade equipment.
Hey, this is bad.
This guy seriously freaks me out.
He is the narcissistic
type and that scares me.
What should I do? My instincts
won't let me accept that man.
I enjoy getting hit more than attacking,
but something about him
makes me want to hit him.
Can I blow him up?
Can I blow him up?
It sounds like my allies unanimously
don't want to join your party.
Bye then.
Please move aside.
Sorry, but I can't leave
Master Aqua in this environment.
What now? He is the type
that won't listen to anyone.
I can see where this is going.
Let's have a match.
I knew it.
If I win, hand Master Aqua over to me.
If you win,
I will listen to any request you have.
All right, I'm in. Here I go!
Hey, wait!
That will teach you
to say whatever you please.
Are you both this guy's allies?
So what? You disgusting man! Coward!
This cheater with a cursed
sword who challenged
a rookie adventurer with weak gear
in a match is the real coward!
Give Gram back!
Only Kyouya can use that cursed sword!
The Cursed Sword, Gram, is only for
use by this narcissistic guy.
Well, I have it now,
so I guess I'll keep it.
Wait a second!
We don't accept the way you won!
I am an advocate of true gender equality.
I am a guy who has no problem doling
out a drop kick to a female opponent.
Don't think I will go easy on you.
I'll unleash my steal skill
right here in public.
So, what will it be?
Come on!
That was Aqua's voice.
I wonder what happened.
She is never satisfied
until she causes a commotion.
She said my reward this time
after deducting the cost of
the broken cage is 100,000 Eris.
The cage repair fee is 200,000 Eris.
I am not even the one who broke it.
Next time when I see that man,
I'm going to nail him
with Fist of God for sure!
I have been looking
for you, Satou Kazuma!
I heard about you from a thief girl.
She said you are a demon
who strips off panties!
Other than that,
there also seems to be rumors
that you're into getting girls
covered in snot.
They call you "Kazuma the Brute".
Hey, wait! Tell me
who is spreading that around!
Master Aqua, I swear that
I will defeat the Devil King.
So, please, join me
Fist of God!
Hey, you!
Pay the repair fee for
the cage you broke!
It's 300,000! 300,000!
Didn't she say 200,000 earlier?
Excuse me! One drink and
a stack of fried frogs please!
I realize this request is too much,
but please
return the cursed sword to me.
In exchange, I'll buy you
the finest sword in the shop.
First, there is the matter
of the cursed sword.
It is no longer being in his possession.
Satou Kazuma, where is the cursed sword?
Where is my cursed sword?
I sold it.
Darn it!
This money is meaningless.
What's wrong with that guy?
By the way, he kept calling Aqua
a goddess. What is that about?
The time is right.
It might be fine
to tell Megumin and Darkness.
I have kept this to myself until now,
but I will tell you.
I am Aqua,
the goddess who rules water,
and is worshipped by the Akuxisi teach.
Yes, I am the goddess Aqua!
Did you dream that?
All adventurers, please
arm yourselves at once
and gather at the
front gate of the village!
Adventurer Satou Kazuma
and his party in particular,
as soon as possible, please!
Him again?
All of you.
Why haven't you come to the castle?
You wretches!
(Episode 6: A Conclusion to
This Worthless Fight!)
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