Lodge 49 (2018) s01e09 Episode Script


1 [LARRY CAWS] Rash is gone.
- [FERNANDO PURRS] - Fur is thicker than ever.
You are one robust feline.
- [CHUCKLES] - [CELLPHONE RINGING] Ready for orders, Captain.
[GRUNTING] Excellent.
Hey, you and Dud need to meet with my accountant.
She wants to take your money.
And I want to give her my money.
She's got the buy-in agreement for the LLC that's gonna make the offers on the land.
- How about 4:00 tomorrow? - Great.
Hey, we're having Band Night at the Lodge tonight, and if you want to swing by, tonight's a great night to.
Nah, I can't tonight.
Hey, so, this gal's office is in Artesia.
- You got a pen? - Yeah.
- 113 - [CALL WAITING BEEPS] Pioneer Boulevard, Suite 10 [CALL WAITING BEEPS] It's the north side of the [GRUNTS] building.
- [GRUNTS] - [CALL WAITING BEEPS] Uh, can you say that again? I gotta go.
Any word Any word from Captain? He wants us to see his accountant tomorrow to sign docs and make this official.
You're gonna need to bring your money.
Should we get a lawyer to look over the prospectus? I'm Yeah, I'm kidding.
- [CLICKS] - Ernie? Hello? It's a joke.
It's a Uh [LARRY CAWING] Maybe things are finally looking up, Larry.
[DOORBELL CHIMES] Your car-title loan was due yesterday.
You know, one day, we're gonna look back on these tête-à-têtes, Burt, and we're gonna laugh.
You know what laughter sounds like? If you let some of the gas out, your rotting inside might sound like laughter.
You know, hey, pretty soon, none of this is gonna matter, okay? You're out of time.
I'm just getting an early start.
I gotta drop my kit off at the Lodge.
[SIGHS] I know I've been crowding you lately.
I'll give you some space.
I've been an asshole.
Oh, no, look, got a good feeling things are gonna get back to normal.
Where's Alice? Playing hooky.
[SIGHS] Do you have a minute? Yeah.
I said, uh, you and Dud were a bad example, and I didn't mean that.
I-I owe you an apology.
Forget it.
I know what Alice is capable of, and I hate seeing her throw it away.
The surfing thing? She's just afraid of the real world.
Well, the real world's overrated.
How was your seminar? Uh, it was an executive recruiting thing.
I made it to the final round.
- Oh! - Yeah.
Oh, then you must have impressed them.
I don't know.
I guess.
It gets me on a salary track.
I wish your dad could see this.
Yeah, I know.
Took a little too long.
Sorry, Dad.
Some kids don't grow up until their parents die.
Maybe that's Alice, too.
Oh, that's sweet.
Kinda messed up, but sweet.
[CHUCKLES] Your dad had faith in you.
I don't know if he told you that.
All the time.
Don't screw it up.
NARRATOR: In bed or on a mission, Stone was no good at beginings, but he knew how to close.
Everything he'd been through in the last eight weeks the microfiche, the 16 kills, and the virus that was now living inside his body was hurtling with him as he double-clutched round a corner, and the Vltava River swung into view.
There, glittering on the far shore like fool's gold, - was Zbraslav - [CAR DOOR CLOSES] the place where all this would end.
Hey! - You coming? - Uh Let's go.
If they turn this place into a cellphone store, I'm gonna burn it down.
- [CHUCKLES] - They won't.
It'll just sit here empty.
We'll all miss it from time to time, then we'll just stop seeing it.
That's what happens.
Maybe something else will happen.
- Like what? - Nothing's gonna happen.
The crowd's getting crazy.
This might be our Altamont.
Better than anything I've seen at Lodge 1.
They just want one last look before it's all gone.
This is a wake.
What's it like in London? Oh.
But all that history? Yeah, but that's just it.
It weighs down on you.
I suppose our tavern is not that different to this, but it just feels heavier.
Nothing lively about it.
Everything muffled.
I bet you can hear yourself think.
I know.
It's terrible.
[CHUCKLING] You know, all I've ever wanted to do is walk in Harwood Fritz Merrill's footsteps in the building he designed himself, but now I see that that would just be tedious and dull.
You're like a wizard of demystification.
Thank you.
So, he wants you to be with her.
That's what he said.
That's kind of weird, right? Yes! It's weird! Scott's a weird dude.
I think he thinks he's doing it for Connie, but he's also doing it for him 'cause now he knows I know he knows.
- Hmm.
- It's a power trip.
Right! Yes! Y You know wh You know what you should do? You should tell her.
Yes, because then then you'll know that she knows he knows.
- Stop.
- What do you mean? What do you mean? Y-You're living the dream.
You're living in a soap opera.
[LAUGHS] Listen you gotta stop saying things like, "It all could work out.
" Until Captain's a done deal, I don't want to jinx it.
[SIGHS] Well, you just jinxed it by saying that.
But I just un-jinxed it by saying this, so Just shut up about it.
- Um [STAMMERING] t-the library, right? You used to You used to check me out.
[BOTH LAUGH] Or not Uh, you checked my books out at the s Um, sorry.
- You work at the library, right? - Yes.
- Right? Right.
- I-I remember you.
I remember you.
[BOTH CHUCKLE] Well, uh, what are you doing here? Oh, my dad works worked at Orbis with Gil Sandoval.
Oh, yeah, I know Gil.
Yeah, I'm a Squire.
He's the Astronomer.
- So - Right.
Um, I've driven by a zillion times, but I've never been inside.
Well, d-do you want do you want me to give you a tour? I can give you a tour if Oh, thank you.
Um my friend went to go get us some beers.
- Oh.
- He's coming back.
Okay, well enjoy the Lodge.
[CHUCKLES] On behalf of all of us.
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
[MUSIC PLAYS IN DISTANCE] You know, it's it's possible you've already walked in Merrill's footsteps.
Aren't there stories of, uh of him traveling to North America during his lost decade? Maybe he came to California.
Well, in the '20s, a German scholar actually wrote a monograph about that.
He also suggested that Merrill was traveling around in order to elude a "one-eyed man" from Cairo he claimed was following him.
Well, um Lynx scholarship is dodgy at best.
But you believe maybe some of it's true.
You think I'm a crackpot.
Look, I know I'm the heathen priest, you know, a non-believer.
Whether I believe every story about Merrill all of this the Lodge and the people and the music it is very real.
And I'm glad that I got to come to Long Beach and be reminded of that.
Last couple weeks have been hard on everybody.
I know it's not your fault.
- Lodge guy.
I love it.
Luminous Knight.
This stuff is hilarious.
You got a men's room? Yeah, yeah, just right around the corner.
All right.
Don't get lost.
[CHUCKLES] Where's your picture? Oh, um, I haven't earned the right yet to have my picture on that wall.
Well, you better hurry up.
[BOTH CHUCKLE] Hey, um, so we've got a library, and you being a librarian, I thought maybe you'd want to see it.
Technically, we're not supposed to bring any non-members up there, but maybe I could make an exception.
Yeah? - Let's go.
- Okay.
Um, oh, we can wait for your friend if you want.
Yeah, so, everything's pretty much the exact same since you know, 60 years ago.
Except the mummy's gone, of course.
I heard something about that in the news.
Oh, yeah? I found it.
I mean, uh, not by myself, but, um, I came through the wall first, and a bunch of other stuff happened, and then I-I actually fell on top of it, uh, and and I breathed in some of his brain dust.
Not everyone can say they've done that.
Yeah, sometimes I just come up here, and I think.
I'm looking at all the same stuff that he was looking at when he died, when he set off on his journey of immortality.
You ever stare at yourself in the mirror so long That your face starts to fall off? Like saying a word over and over and it stops meaning anything.
Because it's not real.
It's, like, a symbol for what's real, but the real thing is hidden beneath the surface.
Like a carrot.
Exactly like a carrot.
RUSSELL: Emily, are you up there? Thank you for the tour.
- Anytime.
Having fun? This is weird, Scott.
Well, haven't you noticed, Fontaine? Everything is weird all the time.
Bes [QUIETLY] Besides, this this isn't about you and me.
- [DOOR CLOSES] - It sort of is.
[SIGHS] Look, I got to go.
I'm No, wait a second.
I'm gonna be at work all day tomorrow.
Now, you understand? This is for Connie.
[FEEDBACK] Every Everyone? Hey, everybody.
Okay, yeah.
Hey, just look around you right now.
Look Look what Look what's happening.
I mean, this place I'm telling you, this place could be like this every night.
You know, Lodge 49 is supposed to go away.
But it can't because there are things there are bigger things at work right now.
Things Things that are bubbling and I mean bubbling under the ground as we speak.
And I know that it sounds a lot like I'm talking about oil, but I'm not.
- [LAUGHS] - [RIM SHOT] I'm talking about the spirit that binds this room and everybody in it together! [CROWD CLAMORS EXCITEDLY] [GUITAR STRUMMING] [CROWD GASPS] - Careful! - Whoa! Lodge 49 isn't going anywhere.
- [CROWD CHEERS] - No, no, no, no, no.
It can never go away because we are the heart of the beast! And we can never ALL: Whoa! [BODY THUDS] [CROWD MURMURING] Whoo! [CROWD CHEERING] [UP-TEMPO ROCK MUSIC PLAYS] Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Yeah! Why do we want impossible things? - [LIQUID POURING] - We're not impossible.
It's like we dug a tunnel back to high school.
It runs right under our real lives.
We're mole rats, baby.
I sowed love But reaped a heartache And here's the thing.
Scott He knows about us.
I gave you all my heart What? I thought he was gonna take a swing at me, but he told me that he thought it was all a good thing, as long as it made you happy.
And he didn't want me to tell you that he told me that he knows.
It's supposed to be our secret.
Like it's me and him having the affair.
Oh, my God.
I know.
It sounds kind of hard to believe.
It isn't, actually.
It's Scott.
Did he say how long he's known? No, but I think it's been for a while.
We've been doing all this running around for nothing.
This is a nightmare.
I feel ill.
It's because we've been living in a moral gray area, but we're almost out of it.
We don't have to hide anymore.
Everything is coming together.
W-Where Where are you going? I don't know.
I can't go home.
- I can't stay here.
- Yes, you can.
We got the room for the whole day.
That's not what I mean.
[INHALES DEEPLY] had a future together Ernie Now you tore it all apart Do you understand what I've done? What we've done? But reaped a heartache I know.
Reaped a heartache Connie.
Please, just stay for a little while.
But reaped a heartache Reaped a heartache Can't.
I just need to think.
But, baby Now you're calling me a mistake [DOOR CLOSES] I sowed love [CARIBBEAN-STYLE MUSIC PLAYS] [INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS] TARQUIN: Give me your eyes.
Tonight is all about the human side of Omni Capital Partners Foodservice West.
Now, I see some of you looking around, anxiously wondering, "Where is Janet Price, our CEO?" Shh.
Don't worry.
Janet is here on the boat.
But she will only appear to those who can see her.
Plus, later on, she's gonna host the raffle, so Be prepared.
Janet told me that she's gonna reach right into your tinder boxes and feel around.
You can decide for yourself what that means.
Okay, you are the essence.
And you have made it here.
So, let's mingle.
[RECORD SCRATCHING] [UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS] You must be thrilled, taking a cruise around your own harbor.
Yeah, I've actually never done this.
I got really seasick last year, so I apologize in advance if I puke all over you, you know.
- That's sweet.
- [CHUCKLES] BARTENDER: Another round? This lady was waiting tables a week ago.
Now she's at the Mingle.
Gives you hope, right? Absolutely.
[LAUGHTER IN DISTANCE] So, what's the plan? Weed out the drunks? - There are no more cuts - Okay.
unless Janet figures out how much she's overpaying me, and then I get cut.
And when do you think Janet will magically appear? You mean you can't see her? What, is she, like, hiding in the Omni suit or something? [CHEERING, LAUGHTER] Oh, my God! Look at her.
Can you imagine that type of commitment? [CHEERING] ERNIE: Hey, Gary, we're at your accountant's office.
I'm not sure if we have the right address.
Call us back.
DUD: Gary must save a lot of money with this accountant.
- [RINGING] - NARRATOR: The red door was ajar.
"Red like blood," he thought.
Or a matador's cape.
[CHUCKLING] "Well, that's what I am," thought Stone.
Hiding in plain sight, like blood on a matador's cape.
No, no, no, don't don't turn it off.
- You're hooked now.
- [RINGING CONTINUES] - Metz is the master.
- Yeah.
Yeah, he is.
[SCOFFS] - Still no answer.
- [CELLPHONE BEEPS] - I don't like this.
- Well, Captain's going through some emotional stuff right now, you know? Maybe he just told us the wrong time.
It feels like what happened to Stone in Luxembourg.
Luxembourg? He got set up, fell into a trap.
Where do you You think Captain's setting us up so someone can steal our cockfighting money? No.
But think about it.
How many people know what we know about the oil? You, me Gary, and the guys Gary works for.
- This is bad.
- Yeah.
What if those guys found out about Gary's plan to screw them over? Well, what if they already got to him? - That's why he's not answering.
- Mm-hmm.
Or maybe we're just being paranoid, you know? - [INDISTINCT WHIRRING] - Whoa.
What is that? [WHIRRING CONTINUES] What? Ah! - A drone?! - That's a drone.
- That's a drone.
- That's a drone.
- What do we do? - Look to your right.
Look to your right.
- Look to your right.
- Oh - Is that an Uber? - I don't know.
I'm just - What does he want? - Okay, look, let's calm down.
- Okay.
- Let's see who he is, see what he wants.
- How did he know we were here, huh? - I don't know.
The best defense is offense.
Go right at him.
Really? - Yeah.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- All right.
[BREATHING HEAVILY] What are you looking at? I don't know.
What am I looking at? You You got any gift baskets for us asshole? - What?! - Let's go.
- What?! - Let's go, let's go, let's go.
- Ooh! Ooh! Who are they?! - Yeah, let's go.
- [ENGINE STARTS] - Hey, man, they're all over the place! Let's go, let's go, let's go! Okay, we're getting surrounded.
We're getting surrounded.
Okay, let's go! Let's move! This is as good a place as any to lay low - until we figure out our next move.
- Phew.
How'd you know about this place? I love hotels.
[SIGHS] [UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS] [INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS] - It's an honor to finally meet you.
- Oh! It is a big honor for you.
Yes, you're very lucky.
[BOTH LAUGH] I broke tape on your viv.
Your rigging was tight.
You caught the wind and crossed the equator.
Oh, I was just kind of - talking out of my ass, but - Exactly.
Intuition is the whore child of Truth and Joy.
- Blammo! - [LAUGHS] - Blammo.
- "Blammo's" a thing in my book.
They're useful tips in little, shaded boxes.
" - Blammo! - Blammo! I also want to say I'm really happy for you two.
What? Uh, I sort of disclosed our relationship.
It's cool.
I encourage Eros eruptions.
How many companies can say that? As long as you file your paperwork with HR, I say go for it.
No, I just, um I'm not sure he disclosed it to me yet.
Well, is it a good thing? Well, he hasn't puked on me today, so, um, yeah, yeah.
It's a It's a good thing.
So, tell me, Liz, where do you see yourself in five years? Ooh, uh, five years.
Um - I don't know.
Um - Think about it.
I want an answer before we get back to the dock.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS] After the Navy, I was with someone for a long time.
She was great.
We lived together.
And it felt real and, uh, grown-up.
And we didn't have to hide anything from anyone.
But that ended.
Was it ugly? It was a sucker punch.
We didn't see it coming.
I was alone for a long time, dating here and there, but nothing had felt real.
And just as I was getting used to the idea of being alone, Connie came back.
Maybe it was a good thing she was with Scott.
Maybe that's why it worked.
I guess we'll see.
Are you in love with her? Yes, I am, but, uh, I don't know if that's enough.
You ever been in love? [CHUCKLES] Uh no one's ever asked me that.
[CHUCKLES] - I never asked myself that.
- Hmm.
I felt something with Gloria.
Yeah, I-I was in love with her, - but it was like this big bang.
- Uh-huh.
You know, I knew it couldn't last.
Yeah, and last night [CHUCKLES] Uh, I don't know.
I don't know.
How was it for you? How did you know when you were in love? Well in my experience, it comes on like an orchestra warming up, and then the music is just playing.
[CHUCKLES] I like that.
You think that we're really in danger? I don't know.
I'm so turned around right now.
- What? - Gary? CAPTAIN: Where the hell are you? My accountant said you never showed.
We were at the shopping center.
I-I called you a bunch of times.
Shopping center? Where Where Look, my phone was off.
I, uh, had to do a little soul-searching.
I tried to look at my life with fresh eyes, like the Lynx.
So, uh I decided to sign the divorce papers.
So, why don't you come by the house? The paperwork's all set.
Brenda's out tagging sea lions at Anacapa all day, so see you in 30? - Yeah, okay.
We'll be there.
- All right.
[CELLPHONE BEEPS] [HUMMING] [POUNDING ON DOOR] SCOTT: Connie! Ernie! I know you're in there! You promised you wouldn't tell her, Ernie! You lied, you selfish bastard! Now you've ruined everything! - Connie's not here! - You've got no honor, man! None! But I do, Ernie! Because I'm a good guy! A good guy! Co Connie? Listen to me.
I'm sorry.
I was just trying to Come on, let's talk.
I mean, maybe we can all work something out.
Hey, Scott.
Uh Connie's not here.
I can vouch for that.
Dud? What the hell is going on in there? [POUNDING ON DOOR] [WHISPERS] Ernie.
Open the door.
- Hey! Open the goddamn door! - Ernie.
- [POUNDING CONTINUES] - Ernie? Open the door! God! Did you tell him where I was? [GRUNTS] [GRUNTS] Holy shit! I know this guy! - He's the geologist! - No, no, no, no.
- We gotta move! We gotta go! - SCOTT: Hey! Hang on! Don't go nowhere.
Hey! [BREATHING HEAVILY] CARL: I was teaching "Rocks for Jocks" out at Long Beach State, but I got greedy and took on this groundwater class out at Pomona.
Like three kids registered, and it was a really long drive, so I didn't think twice about not showing up till the dickhead section leader ratted me out.
I lost both jobs and my Crustal Deformation seminar.
Then my apartment, then my girlfriend.
It was Jenga, man.
ERNIE: Just tell us about the Kaplan architects.
Oh, right.
" So, you knew it was all a scam? Oh, about half the people in that room were in on it.
They paid me to falsify my report and to say the land wasn't toxic and then to improv it up in front of the city council.
[SIGHS] I did my best to get the whole affair out of my mind.
Did the guys you were working for tell you anything else about their plan? Nah, just told me what to say and where to sign.
They never said anything else about the land? That land is dead.
They sucked all the oil out, then the war machine rolled in and took a dump, and then the refineries pissed into the watershed.
It's got nothing left to give.
No, but but [STAMMERS] it does because you can go deeper with the drilling underneath the Right? - With the technology and the - Right.
- You can go - Sorry, guys.
There's definitely no oil.
We should stay in touch.
And thanks for the ride.
I probably won't sue you.
[CAR DOOR CLOSES] Son of a bitch.
[CHUCKLES] I get cluster headaches.
[LAUGHTER IN DISTANCE] I was thinking about your question - where do I see myself in five years? - Ohh.
That was for them.
I-I have to spend a lot of time with my dial turned up to 11.
- What's this, like a 6? - [CHUCKLES] I like you.
You're like a young me.
I'm older than you.
- Well, you know what I mean.
- [CHUCKLES] I didn't have a lot of help navigating the way up.
I'd like to help you.
It would have been so much better not to do it all alone.
I don't really feel like I've earned it.
When you asked me about five years from now I couldn't even see myself, so Oh.
I can't even see myself tomorrow.
I just run as fast as I can and hope it doesn't all fall apart.
[CHUCKLES] Blammo.
It's all noise.
There are real things happening high-level things that actually matter.
You're a natural leader, Liz.
You could be a part of that if you want it.
Do you want it? Yes.
Yeah, I want it.
You have what it takes to go really far.
Janet! The raffle.
[WATER SPLASHES] [INSECTS CHIRPING] ERNIE: Gary better have an explanation.
[ENGINE SHUTS OFF] You ready? I saw what I wanted to see the whole time.
He always had a smile on his face.
Captain? My dad.
[SIGHS] Hmm.
[GARY GRUNTING] Gary? [GRUNTING] - Oh, thank God! - What happened? Some lunatic knocked me out, and I woke up tied to this chair.
Look at this mess! Untie me.
No, don't untie him.
Don't untie him.
Don't point that harpoon at me! Well, where is this lunatic?! Dud, what are you doing? He could still be here in the house.
- Untie me.
- Who is he? It was probably the gift-basket Mafia.
- They found out my plan and sent a guy.
- Your plan.
Your plan Your plan was bullshit! There's no oil, Gary.
We looked into it.
- You lied to us.
- Who told you that? Ernie ran over the geologist.
It doesn't matter.
Just tell us why you lied to us.
Ernie, I swear to God, I'm not lying.
They're going after the oil.
I saw the equipment.
Come on, guys.
I got everything riding on this.
Everything! Why would they drill on toxic land if there's no oil?! Huh?! Why?! H-He's back.
Avery? - Drop the harpoon! - Whoa, whoa, whoa! Okay, all right, all right, all right, all right.
Thought you guys might show up.
- You know this guy? - He's a Lynx.
Or claims to be.
He tried to rob the Lodge.
He He He brought food.
Why Why'd Why'd you bring food? I misjudged his body weight with the chloroform.
I had some time.
I've been watching you for weeks.
The trip to the desert, the rendezvous today with the smoking man.
Putting your ducks in a row, no doubt, to claim my prize.
The smoking man? The Uber dude.
That was his drone.
Oh, what the hell is going on?! Nice try.
You're the financier, yes? You're backing the expedition to Mexico to find the scrolls.
Were you working with Larry Loomis before he died, or are you new to this cabal? - I'm a general contractor.
- Hey, you're after the scrolls? You want to complete the Magnum Opus.
[SIGHS] The Magnum Opus is a fairy tale.
And the scrolls have a far more practical value for me and the people I represent.
- Take a seat, fellas! - Whoa! - Okay.
- Back to back.
- Sit down! - Okay, all right.
I got it.
All right, boys, surveillance time is over.
The interrogation begins.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Do you always roll with that much cash? No, man.
Th-This is my investment capital, man.
Oh, that's good, yeah.
Toss it here.
- No.
- Dud.
Dud, let it go.
You don't need the money.
That's not you.
You and Ernie, you got duende.
You don't need money.
- I'll take the money.
- CAPTAIN: No, because then you'll be like me.
All the pancakes.
It's a guffle.
Pancakes and birds.
[MUMBLING] We can only hope half the sea Oh, no.
The cap's off.
[GASPS, COUGHS] That's far enough, errand boy.
Back off! Oh, oh, oh, wait, wait, wait! - Whoa! - Whoa! Hey, Dud.
Good news.
I got my duende back.
- Gary, don't do anything stupid! - Yeah, yeah! No! [CLATTER, WATER SPLASHES IN DISTANCE] [BREATHING RAPIDLY] H-He nicked my ear! BOTH: Gary? DUD: Gary? Ooh! [GASPS] [GROANS] No! No, no, no! [MOANING] [WEAKLY] Help me [INDISTINCT ANNOUNCEMENT OVER P.
] How can he still be alive? They had to leave the goddamn horn in.
Well It was nice of Brenda to come.
It's over.
You see what happens? You reach for the stars, and then you watch a dude get piked by a narwhal.
I always thought it was "nar-whale.