Moonlighting s04e03 Episode Script

Take a Left at the Altar

Come Walk The Night Come Fly By Day Something Is Sweeter 'cause We Met On The Way Moonlighting Strangers Who Just Met On The Way Who Just Met On The Way Captioning Made Possible By Lions Gate Home Entertainment He Is Now To Be Among You In The Calling Of Your Hearts Rest Assured This Troubadour Is Acting On His Part The Union Of Your Spirits Here Has Caused Him To Remain For Whenever Two Or More Of You Are Gathered In His Name There Is Love There Is Love I Thought You Might Be Craig.
No.
Did You Try To Call Again? No.
Well, Don't You Think You Should? Jackie, Don't You Think You Should Call Him Again? I Never Called Him The First Time.
What? I'm Sure He's Just Running Late.
He Always Loses Track Of Time.
Maybe He Had Car Trouble.
He Doesn't Know How To Call A Cab? I Don't Want Him To Think I Don't Trust Him.
Jackie, The Guy's Wedding Was Supposed To Start And He Hasn't Even Called.
I'm Afraid To Call Him.
As It Was In The Beginning It Is Now Until The End Woman Draws Her Life From Man And Gives It Back Again we're Sorry.
the Number You Have Reached Has Been Disconnected.
there Is No New Number.
Mullins? It's Bryant Wilbourne.
Agnes.
Front And Center.
Come On, Up Periscope.
Lights On.
Pretend You're Home.
Did She Call? No.
She Didn't.
What Time Did You Get Here? Just Like You Asked Me.
And You've Been Here All Morning? You Didn't Go Downstairs For Coffee And A Danish? You Didn't Go Down The Hall To The Bathroom? It's Still Early.
Did She Give You Any Idea When She Might Call? Agnes, If I Knew That, Do You Think I'd Send Out For The Same Crummy Chinese Food Every Night? Do You Think My Stereo Would Be Collecting Dust Because I'm Afraid I'll Miss Her Ring? Do You Think I'd Actually Hang Up On An Obscene Phone Call Because I Didn't Want To Tie Up The Line? No I Don't Know When She'll Call.
Make Sure You Put In For The Overtime.
Beepers! What? I Got The Beepers.
There's Some Kaopectate In Mr.
Addison's Bathroom.
Oh, Agnes, You Joker, You.
No, Agnes.
Telephone Beepers, For Mr.
Addison.
His Own State-Of-The-Art Telephone Pager, So Now He'll Never Have To Worry About Missing Another Call.
Ohh I Took The Initiative Of Picking These Up On The Way To Work, So That Now Now You Will Never Have To Leave A Warm, Cozy Bed At 4:00 In The Morning Again.
And We Can Sleep In.
OhhSleep.
Sleep Is Good.
Well, Actually, I Was Thinking About That Thing That Immediately Precedes A Good, Sound Sleep.
Ohh Got A Light? Yeah, Sure.
You Know What They Say.
Three On A Match-- Bad Luck.
Let's Hope So.
What Happened To Pollyanna? His Wife Left Him Yesterday.
No.
Yes.
I Think He's Trying To Kill Himself, Except He's Afraid Of Sharp Objects And Guns.
Jeez.
Just Up And Left Him, Huh? Seems Like Everywhere You Look These Days, Someone's Leaving Someone Else.
[Knock On Door] Come In.
Sir? I've Brought Beepers.
Beepers? The Circus Clown? No, Sir.
Telephone Beepers.
Thought One Would Come In Handy.
What Happened? Didn't Want To Split The Family? Well, I Brought Several On Approval So You Can See Which One You Like.
Oh, I Don't Care.
Just Pick One And Give Me The Receipt.
Oh, I Couldn't.
I Mean, It Wouldn't Be Right.
A Man's Beeper Is Kind Of A Personal Thing.
All Right, All Right.
I'll Take This One Right Here.
Uh, That One, Sir? What's Wrong With It? Nothing.
Nothing At All.
It's Just Not The Most Aesthetically Pleasing In The Bunch, Tonally Speaking.
It's Got This Irritating Nasal Quality.
It's Kind Of Like "Nyeep, Nyeep! Nyeep! Nyeep!" And While You Don't Want A Wimpy "Peep, Peep, Peep," What You Need Is A Solid, Fully Committed "Beep!" Fine.
I'll Take This One Right Here.
Not A Bad Little Unit, As Long As You're Not Worried About Ruining The Line Of Your Suit.
You Notice That It's Not As Compact As Some Of Your More Streamlined Models.
Thank You, Burt.
Now, If You'll Excuse-- Such As The Microsonic 220x, Featuring A Sleek, Sturdy Design And Digital Readout.
But If I Were You, I Wouldn't Want To Overlook The C-2000 With A Separate Tone For Emergency Calls And An Optional Extended Service Policy.
Sold.
But-- Put A Bow On It! Wrap It Up! Excellent Choice, Sir.
If You Don't Mind, Mr.
Viola, My Beeper And I Would Like A Few Moments Alone Together.
Yes, Sir.
By All Means.
Mr.
Addison, There's One More Thing.
Make It A Fast Thing, Burt.
I Realize You're Probably Feeling A Little Overwhelmed Right Now With Miss Hayes Being Gone From A Business Point Of View.
What Are You Talking About? Secretaries' Skirts Are Shorter.
Liquor Cabinet's Full Of Booze.
Since She Flew The Coop, Things Have Never Run Smoother.
Yes, Sir.
Sir, When A Leg Is Amputated, The Patient Often Believes He Can Still Feel Sensation In The Missing Limb.
Sometimes He'll Even Try To Take A Walk Because He's Forgotten That He Only Has One Leg.
The Odd Socks In The Dryer Ought To Jar His Memory.
Now, Unless This Patient Is Extremely Careful, He's Headed For A Nasty Tumble Down The Stairs.
What I'm Trying To Say To You, Sir, Is, If You Need To Lean On Me, I'm Here.
I'll Call You At The First Sign Of Gangrene.
I'm Worried About Your Personal Life.
It's No Secret To Anybody That You And Miss Hayes Burt! Burt! The Reason They Call It A Personal Life Is Because It Is Personal! Your Own.
Private.
It's None Of Your Business.
I Just Want To Do Everything I Can To Make This Time Easier For You.
Good.
Here's How You Can Start.
Take These Beepers, Get In Your Car, And Head East.
I Want To See How Far We Can Go Before You're Actually Out Of Beeper Range.
But That Would Be At Least 150 Miles! You're Gonna Need Some Money For Gas.
But Mr.
Addison-- Don't Worry About Me.
I'll Pay Myself Back Out Of Petty Cash.
Get On The Road, And Wait For Me To Beep.
Mr.
Addison, There's Someone's Here To See You.
Should I Send Them In? Oh, What The Hell? she Said He Wanted To See Me.
You Got Money For Gas, And Your Choice Of Freeways.
I Don't Think I Should Leave.
I Don't Think You Have Much Choice.
Mr.
Addison-- Am-Scray.
Just Hear Me Out.
Suppose You Take This Case? And Suppose That Beeper Starts Beeping? And Just Suppose It's Miss Hayes? She's Come Back To Her Senses.
She Wants Nothing More From Life Than To Feel Your Heart Pounding Against Hers.
You Paint Quite A Picture, Burt.
She Wants You To Drop Everything And Come Right Away To Chicago, But You Can't Do That Because You're Up To Your Eyeballs In The Case That's About To Walk Through That Door.
You Need Somebody To Backstop You, Sir.
Excuse Me.
Am I Interrupting? No, Not At All.
Come On In.
I'm David Addison.
Bryant Wilbourne.
How Do You Do, Mr.
Wilbourne? This Is My Associate, Burt Viola.
A Pleasure.
A Real Pleasure.
Have A Seat, Mr.
Wilbourne.
Thank You.
What Can We Do For You? I'm Visiting From New York.
I Saw Your Ad In The Yellow Pages.
Do You Handle Missing Persons? Oh, Absolutely.
We Need A Recent Photograph The Person's Name, And Any Aliases Under Which He Or She Has Been Operating.
Last Know Where-- Who Is This Person That's Missing? I'm Afraid It's A Bit Complicated.
It's A Family Matter, Actually.
My Family Consists Of Myself And My Sister Jaqueline--Jackie.
Our Parents Were Killed In An Automobile Accident Over 20 Years Ago.
She Was Still A Young Child At The Time, And I Raised Her, Which, Believe Me, Has Been No Small Task.
Jackie Has Never Been A Very Happy Person.
It's Like She Was Born In A Funk And She Never Got Out Of It.
My Parents' Death Only Made That Worse.
Don't Misunderstand Me.
I Love My Sister Very Much, Or I Wouldn't Be Here.
And You Want Us To Find Her? No, No.
Not Jackie.
My Sister Is, Uh An Extremely Fragile Person.
A Few Years Ago She Had A Breakdown.
After She Got Out Of The Hospital, She Moved Out Here.
She Thought The Change Of Scenery Would Be Healthy.
Anyway, I Paid Her Rent, And She Took Art Classes And Wrote Me Letters That Sounded Well, Like Jackie.
Then A Few Months Ago, The Letters Changed.
She Started Writing About The Beautiful Weather And The Neighbors That She'd Met And The Garden She Was Planting, And A Man.
After A While, The Letters Started To Speak A Lot Less Of The Garden And The Neighbors And A Lot More Of The Man.
[Sigh] I Flew Into Town For Their Wedding, Which Was Supposed To Have Been Yesterday, Only The Groom Never Showed Up.
He's A Pilot, So I Clung To The Hope That He'd Been Delayed.
Finally, I Drove Out To His House, And There Was Nothing-- No Furniture, No Clothes.
He Disappeared.
His Name Is Craig Mullins.
Needless To Say, My Sister Is A Wreck.
Needless To Say, It's Worth A Great Deal To Me To Find This Man.
Well, I Can Certainly Understand Your Position.
Although I Don't Feel Too Good About Finding A Man Just So You Can Mop Up The Floor With Him.
No, It's Not Like That At All.
I Think I Could Make It Worth His While To Reconsider.
I'd Like You To Find Him And Tell Him About The Dowry I'm Willing To Propose.
Dowry.
Mr.
Addison, May I Speak With You In Private For A Moment? Will You Excuse Me For A Minute? What Is It, Burt? I've Solved It.
What? I've Solved It.
I Have Cracked This Case So Wide Open, You Could Stampede A Herd Of Heifers Through The Opening.
I Can Smell The Manure From Here.
Yeah, I'm Starting To Get A Whiff Of Something Myself.
It's Abundantly Clear.
There's No Sister.
There Never Was.
The Way I Figure It, This Guy, Mr.
Wilbourne-- If That's His Real Name-- Wants Us To Believe-- Forgive The Interruption.
SoYou Want Us To Find This Guy So You Can Pay Him To Marry Your Sister.
Mr.
Addison, I Believe This Man Loves My Sister.
He Could Never Have Made Her So Happy If He Didn't.
Am I Doing A Terrible Thing By Trying To Buy My Sister A Chance At Happiness? If You Don't Want To Take The Case, I'll Understand.
I Will Take This Case.
She Would've Been In The Office Hours Ago.
What Kind Of Person Sleeps Till 12:30 On A Thursday? Well, I Mean, The First Day, Jetlag, Ok.
The Second Day Fine.
Different Time Zones, Whatnot.
She's Been Here For A Week.
She Is On Vacation.
Don't You Find Her Behavior A Little Odd? Oh, Alex.
What "Oh, Alex!" You Just Said She's On Vacation.
What Kind Of A Vacation? She Doesn't Want To Go Anywhere, She Doesn't Want To Do Anything.
She Just Wants To Be With Us.
Oh, Really? Is That Why She Sleeps All Day And Watches Television All Night? No.
What She Is Doing Is Avoiding Us.
No, She Is Not.
She Most Certainly Is.
In This Entire Week, Have We Had One Real Conversation? We've Talked.
I'm Not Talking About Talk.
I'm Talking About Conversation.
We Sit At The Dinner Table, Talk About The Weather.
When You Ask Her About Her Private Life Or Her Business, She Becomes Evasive.
Once In This Whole Week Have You Seen Her Pick Up A Telephone, Check On Her Business? How Does She Know The Place Hasn't Burned Down? I Find It Odd.
Odd? Odd.
And You Don't? Well, Fine, Fine.
Ah.
Well, I've Got To Go.
And I'll Tell You Something Else I Find Odd.
No One Has Called Her.
She's Got This Whole Operation In Los Angeles.
Not One Emergency Comes Up That's Important Enough For Somebody Out There To Pick Up A Phone? They Don't Want To Bother Her.
Oh, Bull.
I Run A Business.
I Know What Goes On.
I Mean, Hell, We Took That Trip Around The Greek Islands.
We Weren't On That Boat Five Days, But I'm Being Paged By Riley.
Crisis In Evanston.
Do You Remember? Right In The Middle Of The Shuffleboard Contest.
Yes, Yes, I Remember.
Waiting For What? Oh, Good Morning, Stranger.
Good Morning.
Good Morning, Darling.
Am I Interrupting Anything? No, Not At All.
Can I Get You Something To Eat? No, I Don't Think So.
Thanks.
You've Hardly Eaten Anything Since You've Been Here.
They Won't Recognize You When You Get Back.
Well, She Can Reintroduce Herself.
Sure I Can't Fix You Something? Must Be Tough On Everybody Out There Trying To Keep The Show Rolling Without You.
Oh, I'm Sure They're Doing Fine.
No, Really.
I'm Fine.
I'm Ok.
How About Some Eggs? O.
K.
, If It's No Trouble.
Trouble? Don't Be Silly.
How Do You Feel About A Game Of Tennis? Feel Up To Playing Tennis, Just You And The Old Man, Huh? I Don't Know, Dad.
How Would You Like Them Fixed? I Don't Know, Mom.
How About Some Golf? Your Mother Gave Me A New Golf Cart For Christmas.
How About Scrambled? I Guess So.
No, I Don't Think So.
Maybe A Swim At The Club.
Or Fried.
You Used To Love Fried Eggs.
Whatever's Easiest.
We Won't Have To Swim.
We Could Have A Couple Bloody Marys.
Please! Please? Please, Mama, Just Juice.
I Don't Care What Kind.
Dad, I Would Love To Go To The Club With You, Just Not Today.
I I Don't Know What's Wrong With Me.
I Guess I'm Tired Still.
Well, You've Had A Hard Year.
I Guess I Have.
Listen, Don't Worry About Me.
The Club Will Wait.
I Can Show You Off Anytime.
Well, I'll Get The Juice.
Mom, Really.
I Don't Think I Want Anything.
I'd Just Like To Take A Long Bath, O.
K.
? Sure.
Ok.
Odd.
Sir, I Don't Know How You Keep Up With This Blistering Schedule.
A Dozen Airports Yesterday, We're Not Even Halfway Through Our List Yet.
Now You Know How I Keep That 31 Inch Waistline, Burt.
By The Time You're Done With This Case, You're Gonna Be Looking At Conan In The Mirror Every Morning.
Sir, I Have A Favor To Ask.
Would It Be Possible Might You Consider Letting Me Be The Point Man This Time? You Mean You Want To Go In There And Ask All The Questions? If You Wouldn't Mind Spotting Me, Sir.
Burt, In Any Two Man Team, There's A Top Dog And A Second Banana.
Do I Look Like A Fruit? No, No, Sir.
It's Just I Feel It's Important For Me, Not To Mention The Agency, That I Develop An Investigative Style Of My Own-- A Modus Operandi.
Right Now We Got Case-Us Interruptus.
Sir Sir, I've Got To Get My Hands Dirty Sometime.
Just Remember To Wash Them Afterwards.
Get In There.
Aye, Aye, Sir.
Good Morning, Sir? How May I Help You? Agent Kuryakin.
United Network Command For Law Enforcement.
Heel, Burt.
Hi.
Have You Seen This Man? Oh, Yes.
That's Captain Girardi.
Are You Sure? We Had A Different Name.
No, It's Definitely Craig Girardi.
He's Been Flying With Us For Years.
He's Not In Any Trouble, Is He? No.
Everybody Should Be In That Kind Of Trouble.
We're With The Irs.
We Have A Big Refund Check For Him.
Some People Have All The Luck.
He's Due In From Phoenix At 4:53.
You Can Wait If You Want.
Thank You Very Much.
Come On, 99.
flight 127 To Tampa Bay Is Now Boarding At Gate 4.
[Sigh] Ixnay, Burt.
Pardon Me, Sir? No More Gruesome Headlines, No More Household Hints, No More Advice From Ann Landers To A Cross-Dressing Shriner.
Rotarian, Sir.
Actually, I Wasn't Planning On Reading Anything.
Good.
It's Just There's This Thing I Haven't Been Able To Shake All Day.
You're On Your Own In That Department, Burt.
No, I Mean A Feeling.
Not A Feeling Exactly.
It's More Like A Realization.
Sitting Here, In This Airport, Today, It Came To Me.
We Are Merchants Of Misery.
We Traffic In Sadness.
It's Our Stock In Trade.
Our Bread And Butter.
People Don't Come To Us When They're On Top Of The World.
Why Should They? We Make Our Money Off Of The Aggrieved.
The Crushed The Heartbroken What Is This, Open Mike Night At The Mortuary? Well, I Guess The Point, Sir, That I'm Trying To Make Is, Where Do We Go When We're Sad? Anywhere You're Not.
I Mean, You Take Hugh Hefner.
The Guys Sits Around All Day Poring Over Hundreds Of Pictures Of-- Burt! Please, Will You Fast Forward? Oh.
Well I Guess The Point I'm Trying To Make, Sir, Is If I Could Help You, I Would.
Thank You For That Thought, But There Really Won't Be Any Need.
No Need? No Need.
nada.
Zip.
Sitting Here All Day, I've Had A Chance To Think A Little Bit, Too.
And One Less Blonde In My Life Means A Lot More Life In My-- [Beep Beep Beep] What Is That? Your Beeper.
Need Change For The Telephone? How Do You Turn It Off? [Beeper Stops] Yes.
Hello, This Is David Addison.
You Just Beeped Me.
Yes.
I'll Hold On.
Yeah.
Hold On A Minute.
He's Right Here.
Hey, Voltaire.
It's For You.
Thank You, Sir.
Hello.
Hi, Agnes.
I'm Fine.
How Are You? Yeah.
I Miss You, Too.
flight 77 From Phoenix Now Arriving At Gate 2.
flight 77 Now Arriving At Gate 2.
Hang It Up.
Head It Out.
Sir, The Eagle's Landed? Yeah.
Well, Aren't We Gonna Give Him An Offer To Feather His Nest? Not Here.
Not Now.
Well, When? Guy's Got Jet Lag Written All Over Him.
We'll Follow Him Home, Let Him Kick Off His Shoes, Slide Into A Martini, And Then Pop The $50,000 Question.
Look At This Guy.
Not A Care In The World.
Blows Into Town, Pulls Out His Little Black Book Like Sky King.
Yes? Hi.
Roger, Charles, Please Do That In The Backyard.
Sorry, Can I Help You? Obviously You're The Lady Of The House? Yes, I Am.
We're With Harem Scarem Carpet Cleaning Company.
We're Here For Your Free Estimate You Asked For.
I'm Sorry.
I Didn't Order Any Carpet Estimate.
Aren't You Mrs.
, Uh Abercrombie? No.
No, I'm Mrs.
Girardi.
Not Mrs.
Abercrombie? No.
Sorry To Bother You.
It's Ok.
Mr.
Addison, What Are We Going To Tell Bryant Wilbourne? Obviously, He Makes A Very Good Husband.
He Actually Let Jackie Book The Chapel, The Reception, Invite The Guests, And He Had No Intention Whatever Of Going Through With It.
Maybe He Had To Go To A Little League Game.
Meaning? Meaning That Craig Mullins-- Slash Girardi--- Fully Intended To Go Through With It, Just Couldn't Get Away That Day.
He Planned On Being A Bigamist? Good Work If You Can Get It.
Mr.
Addison-- Look, Mr.
Wilbourne, The Point Is, It Looks Like A Short Walk Down The Aisle Turned Into A Long Ride.
But Why? Why Would Someone Go To Those Lengths? Certainly Has A Superficial Appeal.
If Wife Number One Gets A Headache, You Got Wife Number Two And Three Across Town.
All Three Of Them Get A Headache, You Go Out To A Bar And Pick Out Wife Number Four.
An Engagement Ring Is A Very Powerful Aphrodisiac, Mr.
Wilbourne.
She's So Fragile, She's So Vulnerable.
And He Knew That.
He Had To Know That.
And He Took Advantage Of It.
What Mystifies Me Is Why She Let Him.
People Believe What They Got To Believe.
No, That's Not Like Her.
Jackie's The Last Person On Earth To Believe A Man Especially In Matters Of The Heart.
The One Time She Should Have Suspected-- What's To Suspect, Mr.
Wilbourne? The Man Is A Pilot.
Pilots Are Known To Be Gone A Couple Days, A Couple Weeks.
All He's Gotta Do Is Phone Jackie Every Once In A While, Tell Her He Loves Her Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder, Doesn't It? Two Detectives.
I Must Be An Important Case.
I'm Not Angry That He Hired You.
I'm Not Even Surprised.
He's Always Been The Overprotective Sort.
I'm Just Afraid To Know Why He Hired You.
Why Did You Hire Them, Bryant So That You Could Harm Craig, Exact Some Revenge? My Big Brother To The Rescue? Will That Solve Anything? Will That Make Me Feel Any Better? Make You Feel Any Better? Mr.
Wilbourne, We've Got To Get Back-- Please Stay.
I'm Actually Glad I Heard All This.
I'm Glad To Know That Craig's Alive, That Nothing Horrible Happened To Him.
You See, I Don't Care That He's Married, That He Never Told Me.
It Doesn't Matter.
I Know What He Did Tell Me.
I Know He Wanted To Marry Me.
I Know He Wanted To Have A Family With Me.
I Know That He Wanted To Keep All Those Plans.
It's Just That He Didn't Know How.
Miss Wilbourne Your Brother Hired Us Because He Wanted An Explanation.
That's All.
Now You Have It.
Go Home, Burt.
Make Agnes A Nice Dinner.
Sir? Just Do It.
You're A Lucky Guy.
Yes, Sir.
Would You Care To Join Us? No.
I'm Going To Call It A Night.
You're Trying To Sneak Out Without Saying Good-Bye? I Was Going To Get Something To Eat.
I Can't Sleep.
Lots Of That Going Around.
If You Want To Get A Snack, Don't Let Me Stop You.
No.
I Don't Know.
Are You Drinking? [Laughs] Well, I'm Having A Drink.
I Don't Know That I'm Drinking.
Ok If I Join You While You're Not Drinking? Please, Please.
Mom Ok? Oh, Sleeping Like A Baby.
Mom.
Mmm.
Grace Under Pressure-- That's Her Strong Suit.
One Of The Reasons I Married Her.
She Got Twice As Much Of It As Anyone I Ever Met.
She Got My Share, I Think.
Are You Under Pressure? Oh, No, No, No.
You? There Was A Time Whenever You Had A Problem, The First Person You'd Come To-- That Hasn't Changed.
I Don't Know, Kid.
We've Been Around A Lot Of Bends.
Just Want You To Know If You Need Anything, I'm Here.
I Know, Daddy.
Tell You Something About Me.
I'm A Selfish Son Of A Buck.
I Don't Just Want To Help You.
I Need To Help You.
There's Something Kicking Around Inside You, Causing You A Lot Of Pain.
I Want To Make It Go Away.
Not Just For You, For Me.
Really.
That Would Make Me Feel Like A Million Bucks.
I Know That, Daddy.
When You Were 5, I Could Make It Go Away With A Kiss Or A Quarter.
But I Don't Suppose That Does The Trick Anymore.
I Don't Think So.
I Don't Know.
There's Really No Pain.
I'm Just Confused About Some Things, That's All.
No Big Deal.
Well.
Little Kiss To Grow On.
I'd Better Get Upstairs.
If I Stay Away Too Long, That Damn Cat Jumps Up On The Bed, Snuggles Up Next To Your Mother.
I'm Out Of Luck.
Daddy.
I'm Sorry.
Don't Be Sorry.
It Doesn't Matter.
Like I Said, I'm Selfish.
Totally Selfish.
[Telephone Rings] Maddie.
[Ring] A Flesh Wound.
[Ring] [Ring] What? Yes, This Is David Addison.
Yes, David Addison Of The Blue Moon Detective Agency.
Oh.
Jackie.
What? Appreciate The Limo Ride, Burt.
Something About A Phone Call From A Hysterical Woman That Makes You Not Want To Wait For A Cab.
You'd Think That Shop Would Be Almost Done Fixing The Bmw.
Any Day Now.
Then You Won't Have To Leave Agnes Alone In Your Nookatorium Anymore.
Jackie Said She'd Meet Us Here.
Thought The Policeman's Ball Was Next Week.
Weird.
Somebody Killed One Of The Pilots.
Whacked Him Over The Head With A Wrench.
Caught The Murderer, Too.
Who Was It? My Brother, Mr.
Addison.
You Should Never Have Found Craig.
Then This Would Never Have Happened.
How Can You Be So Reckless With Other Peoples' Lives? What Was It To You? An Afternoon's Work.
A Nice Fee.
Do You Know What It Is To Me? Two Men I Love.
One Dead The Other Ruined.
You Were Hired To Find My Husband? That's Right.
You Did Your Job Too Well.
We're Very Sorry About Your Loss, Mrs.
Girardi.
Craig Never Had An Enemy In His Life.
He Was The Best Person I've Ever Known.
Why Would That Man Want To Kill Him? We're Asking Ourselves That Question Right Now.
My Husband--He Never Thought About Himself.
He Always Thought About Me And The Boys First.
He Acted Like They Were His Own Kids Instead Of Just What He Got With The Package Deal.
He Worshiped Them I Guess 'cause He Couldn't Have His Own.
Your Husband Was Unable To Have Children? Craig Flew Combat In Vietnam, And He Was Shot Down.
It Just Wasn't Very Important To Me.
That's Not Why I Married Him.
Mrs.
Girardi, Why Don't You Let Us Drive You Home? No.
I Have A Lot Of Things To Take Care Of.
I Can't Help Feeling Somehow I'm To Blame.
I Let You Down, Sir.
Keep It Up, Burt.
You Got A Big Future As A Doormat.
It's No Secret.
You've Been Preoccupied Lately.
I Promised I'd Be There For You, But When You Needed A Partner, A Backstop, What Was I Doing? Bobbling The Ball.
Bryant Wilbourne Played Me Like A Baby Grand.
He Ran Out Of The House.
Then I Heard His Car Screeching Out Of The Driveway.
Well, Then You Know The Rest.
Thank You.
That'll Be All For Now.
Miss Wilbourne.
Hi.
Sorry To Bother You Again.
Last Night You Said That You And Craig Had Planned A Large Family.
Yes.
He Went Along With That? He Was The One Who Was So Insistent.
Craig Loved Kids.
He Had His Heart Set On A Brood.
Of Course, I Didn't Know He Had Two Of His Own.
Those Kids Are His Wife's From Another Marriage.
What Difference Does That Make Now? Why Would Your Intended Spin A Yarn About Raising A Houseful Of Babies When It Wasn't Exactly A Threat He Was Prepared To Carry Out? He Never Said Anything To You About An Injury? Where There's A Will, There's A Way.
Except, Of Course, In Craig's Case.
So He Was Lying About The Kids, Just Like He Lied About Everything Else.
I Don't Really Think He Lied To You.
As A Matter Of Fact, I Don't Think He Ever Really Spoke To You.
Haven't I Been Through Enough Today Without Listening To This? Never Left You At The Alter, Never Asked You To Marry Him, Never Lived In The House You Rented For Him-- Never Even Saw It.
A Pilot Makes A Good Choice As Mr.
Right.
Always Out Of Town.
Never Had To Introduce Him To Your Friends.
You Boo-Hooed Up A Storm And Sure, So Your Brother'd Get Hopping Mad.
Mad Enough For The Police To Think They Found A Man With A Motive.
How Did You Lure Bryant Out To The Scene Of The Crime? Of Course, Doesn't Really Matter, As Long As He Was In Time To Get Fitted For The Handcuffs.
I Think You Both Need Professional Help.
What Possible Reason Would I Have For Concocting Such A Scheme? May I Field This One, Sir? With Big Brother In The Big House, There'd Only Be One Person In Control Of What Would Presumably Be A Very Big Trust Fund.
How Am I Doing, Sir? Bull's-Eye.
Bulls-Eye.
After That Trustbuster.
Come On! [Shouting] Mr.
Addison, She's Getting Away.
Relax, Burt.
This Is The Part Where It Always Looks Like The Villain's Getting Away.
What Do We Do Now? Exit, Frame Right! Hey, That's My Car! Come Back! Sir, What Exactly Are We Doing Here With This? Commandeering The Next Available Vehicle.
What, An Airplane, Sir? You're Getting The Hang Of It, Burt.
You're Even Starting To Sound Like The Blonde.
Hop In The Rumble Seat And I'll Get The Wheels Locked.
Burt! Put It In Park! I Can't Find It! Fly Like You've Never Flown Before! That Shouldn't Be Difficult! I've Never Flown Before! Mr.
Addison, Don't Think I Don't Appreciate This Opportunity, I Really Do.
But I Think A Less Exciting Action Piece Might Be More Appropriate To Involve Me In My First Chase.
Nonsense, Burt.
Time To Earn Your Wings Or Go Down In Flames.
I Kind Of Saw It That Way Myself, Sir.
Keep Her Steady, Teddy.
Mr.
Addison, We're On The Street In An Airplane! You're Right! Don't Forget To Use Hand Signals! [Horns Honking] What'd I Tell You? You're A Natural! Bet You Could Do This With Your Eyes Closed! Mr.
Addison-- Hold That Thought, Burt.
I'm Going To Stretch My Legs For A Minute.
Mr.
Addison! Waah! Oops.
Let's Hit It, Herbert! Pull Back On The Stick, Burt.
Bless My Aunts And Uncles Burt, Pull Back On The Stick! Gonna Fly Now Burt, Pull Back On The Stick Now! Aah! Aah! I Knew That Was Gonna Happen.
What Do We Do Now, Sir? We're Flying A Skywriter, Aren't We? Yes, Sir.
I Know, Sir! It's Time To Write A Finish On This Chase.
Get Smokin'! Aah! Aah! And They Say Air Travel Isn't As Safe As It Used To Be.
[Elevator Dings] Wake Up, Agnes.
Time To Hit The Hay.
Mr.
Addison.
Where Have You And Burt Been All Day? Calming Down Property Owners Car Owners Plane Owners.
She Didn't Happen To, Uh No.
She Didn't Happen To Why Don't You Get Out Of Here And Get Some Shuteye? "Dear Maddie "I Know I'm Not Supposed To Pick Up The Phone, but You Never Said I Couldn't Drop A Line.
" "Dear Goldilocks "How's It Blowing In The Windy City? "By The Way, While You're Mulling Your Life Over, do You Mind If I Present My Case One More Time?" "Dear Maddie, "A Brief Memo To Update You "On The Latest True Story "From The Blue Moon Case Files "So Far As I Can Figure, the Brother Still Owes Us For Solving The Case.
"Of Course, We Did Incur A Few Minor Operating Expenses.
"What Do You Think A Vintage Biplane Goes For These Days? aside From That, The Office Is Running Like Clockwork.
"Believe It Or Not, i'm Gonna Call A Staff Meeting This Week.
" * Every Limbo Boy And Girl * yeah! "I Can Imagine What You're Thinking, "But Everything Here Has Been All Business, "With The Exception Of A Few Little Diversions to Keep Morale Up While Our Fearless Leader Is Gone.
" burt: Mr.
Addison, The Band Wants To Know where They Should Set Up? "Listen, From The Score One From Your Side File, macgilicuddy's Wife Left Him.
" david: So, What Do You Want To Get Him? maddie: Who? the Blushing Groom.
how About A Good Lawyer? "Guess You Called That One.
you Know Me, The Hopeless Romantic.
" david: Women Can't Live With 'em, can't Leave 'em By The Curb when You're Done With 'em.
"Well, I Filled My Letter Writing Quota For The Year.
"It's Time To Go.
oh, Agnes Says To Say" agnes: Hi.
"And it's Not Right Around Here without You Slamming Doors and Yelling.
"Anyway, Don't Worry.
"Stay In Chicago As Long As You Need To.
"One Last Thing-- this Is All A Bunch Of Crap.
i'm Miserable, And I Want You To Come Home.
" Captioning Made Possible By Lions Gate Home Entertainment Captioned By The National Captioning Institute --TC6 WAS HERE-- Come Walk The Night Come Fly By Day Something Is Sweeter 'cause We Met On The Way Moonlighting Strangers Who Just Met On The Way Who Just Met On The Way