Mr. Corman (2021) s01e03 Episode Script

Happy Birthday

1
Josh.
Yes?
What are you doing out here?
I'm here for my mother.
I know. I mean, come on in.
We haven't met.
No. I mean, I know you from the pictures,
and your mom's told me all about you.
-You want some coffee?
-No, thanks.
Well, sit down.
But don't sit in that one.
That's the broken one.
I know which one is the broken one,
thanks.
There's one for my heart
and one for my prostate cancer.
I'm sorry.
It's fine. I barely have it.
Doesn't affect my sex life.
That's great.
It's great to finally meet you.
What's Ruth told you about me?
Nothing.
That's hilarious. That's so her.
It's not really.
Sure it is. You know her.
I thought I did.
Why are you so early?
I just didn't wanna hit traffic.
All right.
Well, I'll go get myself together.
Look at her go.
Why are you driving so slowly?
I told you I had a few panic attacks.
I thought you were better.
I am. This is me better. But I just--
Some things make me
a little extra anxious.
Like driving on the freeway,
which, by the way,
is a legitimately dangerous thing.
Everybody should be anxious
driving on the freeway.
-It's just we're all used to it.
-Right.
Well, guess it doesn't matter
how slowly you drive
because you showed up at my house
so early.
So, how did you and Larry meet?
Well, it's nothing serious
if that's what you're asking.
But how long have you been dating?
About a year.
What?
Don't make a big deal out of this.
That's crazy.
We usually tell each other things.
You don't tell me everything.
I tell you a lot.
A year.
So, what,
you started seeing him last October?
-Yes. You had just broken up with Megan…
-Right.
…so you were feeling delicate.
I just decided to wait
until you got a little stronger.
Well, it's been a year.
Have I gotten a little stronger?
You know you don't do well
when other people are happy.
I don't know that.
Well, none of us do, but you just
have it worse than the rest of us.
Wow.
Look, how were you
when your sister married Aaron?
-I was very happy for her.
-No, you thought she could do better.
Well…
But I don't know
why you hate Aaron so much.
I don't hate Aaron. He's fine.
And what's wrong with being fine?
Nothing.
I think it's because he's so religious.
You're anti-Semitic.
I'm half Jewish.
You're half anti-Semitic.
That's a serious accusation to make.
-Don't be overly sensitive.
-I'm not being overly sensitive.
I can be critical of organized religion
without being labeled an anti-Semite.
Yeah, I'm proud of being a Jew.
-Really?
-Yeah.
How so?
-"How so"?
-Yeah. I'd like to hear this.
How are you proud of being Jewish?
I'm proud of…
Bob Dylan, and the Coen brothers,
and Ruth Bader Ginsburg,
-and brisket and tzimmes.
-You should stop.
-You sound ridiculous.
-Fine, but it's not the point.
My problem with Beth
isn't that she's religious,
it's that she's a control freak.
I've said this many times.
She married a religious man
because she thinks
it will help her stay in control.
But the truth is,
you can't control everything,
and that's why she's--
That's why she's always unhappy.
Are you sure she's the unhappy one?
Could we pull over somewhere?
I have to pee now.
-Can you wait until we get there?
-We're only halfway there.
That's 'cause
Aaron had the great idea to move
-all the way out to Valencia.
-Oh, God.
If you were driving faster,
we'd be there by now.
Well, I feel a million times better.
Good.
Did Elizabeth tell you
what to get for Sara?
Yeah.
Me too, yeah.
She even told me where to buy it.
I thought part of the fun was
picking the gift out.
Yeah, well, that's what I'm saying.
She's a control freak.
Well, you're not wrong about that.
Look, I'm happy you met someone.
Well, thank you.
It's been a while.
Hasn't been that long a while.
It has. But so what?
I guess you're right.
I've been very unlucky with men.
I didn't say that.
No, I have been. Very unlucky.
I have been.
What is that supposed to mean?
I don't know.
Was it luck or was it your choices?
Your father was very different
when I met him.
He didn't have
all the problems he had later.
Or he did,
and you just chose not to see them.
I think you remember him
as worse than he really was.
Okay.
He never hit you.
That depends on
your definition of hitting.
You were never in any danger.
-We were absolutely in danger.
-When?
How about anytime he drove a car?
Why do you think
I'm such a nervous driver?
You're just talking about
that one time when--
No. Many, many times.
Or how about the time
he almost burned the house down?
-He didn't almost burn the house down.
-A fire truck came.
They used their hoses and things.
I'm just saying.
You got to choose Dad, I didn't.
So, you know, maybe I'm the unlucky one.
Well, that's a very hurtful thing
to say to me.
How do you think it feels
to know that your son blames you
for his miserable life?
I'm not miserable. I didn't say that.
You might not have meant to, but you did.
-Do you want me to--
-No, I'm fine.
Hello?
Hello?
-Mom?
-Hello.
-Hey!
-Hi.
Here you go.
-Here you go.
-Thank you.
Thank you.
You both got Sara exactly what I asked.
Yeah, you told us to.
Yeah. You know, sometimes
people resent being asked what to get.
-Really?
-No.
We enjoyed getting you
just what you asked for--
-Punch buggy!
-Okay.
-David!
-What's punch buggy?
It's a game he's been playing.
-Is it a game?
-Yeah.
I have no idea what the rules are,
but he thinks it's hilarious.
-It is something.
-Okay.
-It's not nothing.
-Okay.
-Hey, guys.
-Hey.
-Hello.
-Hey. Hi.
-I love what you did with your hair.
-Hey.
Mrs. Nover?
-Same haircut I always get.
-Someone's crying outside.
-Maybe they lost at punch buggy.
-Oh, shit. Fuck.
Sorry, Abby.
Mom, if maybe you could
plate the crudités,
that would be a big help, yeah?
Can you show me?
-So, how you doing?
-Good, man. What's going on with you?
Not much, not much.
Just got the new car.
You probably saw it when you came in.
It's in the driveway. It's a green Subaru.
Right on. Sorry, yeah,
I'm just bad at noticing cars.
I notice them when I'm driving, but…
Yeah. You wanna come see it?
-Yeah, sure.
-Sure? I mean, you don't have to.
-No, I could see it.
-Nah, it's fine.
-I'll see it on the way out then.
-Great.
-Let me know if you want me to open it up.
-Yeah, cool.
Cool. Good.
Aaron!
-I gotta go.
-Yep.
I love Costco hummus.
-Josh.
-What? I do.
Do you see how much time they let him
have on that thing? It's not okay.
Did you see his eyes? It's scary.
You played just as many video games
when you were his age.
I mean, for hours you would sit
in front of that screen.
And you turned out fine.
Did I?
-Are you done?
-What? I'm just concerned for him.
-No, you are not.
-What makes you say that?
You have always
had something against David.
I don't have anything against David.
-He's just a bad person.
-He's seven!
Yeah, but you can be a bad person
when you're seven.
Doesn't mean you'll stay a bad person.
Although I wouldn't really bet on David,
especially if they--
-They keep letting him play--
-These tomatoes are bad.
Is there an owl in the backyard?
-Yes!
-There is.
-We have to do something about this owl.
-Yes.
I'm awake in the daytime even though
I have daytime in the nighttime.
I know, yeah. Last time we had
that conversation about owls,
and in the daytime, they're asleep,
but in the nighttime, they hunt.
Yes,
But I wanna hunt.
So I wanna fly, and I wanna hunt
for a mouse for my dinner.
-You wanna fly right now?
-Yeah.
Okay. Ready? Let's go.
Okay. She's flying.
She's flying over the prairie.
She's looking for a mouse.
-There's one! That way!
-Which way?
-Inside.
-Inside. Okay, here we go.
Okay. Which way?
-Upstairs.
-Up here?
-Yeah.
-Okay.
And she landed.
You gonna catch the mouse?
Got it.
Now it's time to eat the mouse for dinner.
Okay, it's dinnertime.
How was it?
Good, but why does the owl eat the mouse?
I guess 'cause she was hungry.
Why?
Well, same reason you get hungry.
You gotta eat to keep living.
Your body's built out of food.
Why?
Because food has
all kinds of nutrients and proteins.
-Why?
-Why?
That's a good question.
Is it because that's just
how God made the world?
Where'd you hear that?
Is it?
Was someone telling you the story about
how God created the world in seven days?
It's not a story.
-It's not?
-No!
-Is that funny?
-Yeah.
Okay, can I ask you a question?
Have you ever seen God?
-Yeah.
-You have?
Yeah. Have you ever seen him?
No.
Why?
Well, I haven't seen him in real life,
but that doesn't mean
that you can't still see him.
Why?
Why?
Because… Well, God is sort of like
the mouse you just ate for dinner.
-It's pretend, but it can feel real.
-Josh.
Hi.
Hey.
Sweetie, your friends are all
looking for you outside.
Why don't you say goodbye to Uncle Josh?
Okay. Bye, Uncle Josh.
Bye, darling.
-Go away.
-Can we just talk for a second?
No, not now.
You ever see that blog,
Things Organized Neatly?
Nope.
What are you looking for?
Birthday napkins.
I don't need help.
"Miscellaneous"?
Goddamn it.
-Look, I'm sorry.
-No, you're not, Josh.
If you were sorry, you wouldn't have
done it in the first place.
We were just having a conversation.
Telling a five-year-old
that God isn't real is not a conversation.
That's you imposing
your ideas on my daughter.
She asked me if I had ever seen him.
What, was I supposed to lie?
It's not a lie.
It would be if I said it.
You can tell a child a story
and let them believe it
without it having to be true.
So you don't even think
it's true that God is real,
but you want me to tell Sara--
Of course I believe in God.
I'm trying to be respectful of
the fact that you don't.
No one else is here.
You can tell me what you really think.
That is what I really think.
-And if you hadn't married Aaron, then--
-But I did.
You can be so dumb sometimes.
-Honestly, you think you know everything.
-I don't think I know everything.
-You think you know everything.
-I think I know everything?
Yeah. You think
you have it all figured out.
There's this old man up in the sky,
and as long as you follow his rules,
then everything just stays under control.
Yeah. I guess, you know,
it's easier if things were out of control,
because then nothing's your fault.
You think the entire world is chaos
because our lives were chaos.
And yours still is.
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, dear Sara
Happy birthday to you
Bye, honey.
-Happy birthday.
-Thanks.
Goodbye, young man. Behave.
-Thanks, Ruth.
-Night, Aaron.
-All right. Bye, sweetie.
-Love you.
-I love you.
-Love you too. Don't worry.
Thanks.
What's wrong with you?
Look, I'm sorry.
You're not sorry, okay?
'Cause if you were sorry,
you wouldn't be this way.
-I'm not trying to be any kind of way.
-Well, you're not trying not to be.
-Sara asked me if I--
-It's Sara's fault now?
You're gonna blame
your five-year-old niece for everything?
Because earlier, everything that was
wrong with your life was my fault.
-I didn't say that.
-You pretty much did.
Do you know how many stupid books I read
on how to be a good parent?
Yes. I remember the shelf.
It was two shelves.
Do you know how scared I was?
But then you grew up, right?
You seemed okay.
You acted like somebody who had
a good childhood.
So I thought, well,
maybe it was a good childhood.
I mean, it could have been better,
I understand.
But it certainly could have been worse.
I guess I just started
letting myself believe that…
maybe I did it.
Maybe that was the one thing in my life
I did that was truly worth something.
I was a good mom to my kids.
I guess I was just kidding myself
'cause I fucked that up too, evidently.
Mom, I had a good childhood.
Please don't say that
to make me feel better
-because it just makes it worse.
-You're--
You're a wonderful mom.
-You always were.
-Please, stop. Please, just stop it.
Look.
I have to pee.
Okay.
What are you looking at?
Nothing.
When we met
I was younger
Than a young thing can be
You were wet
You were hungry
You still needed me
You said I could fly
And I flew
I remember before you knew
-You taught me to talk
-How to talk
Now I talk like you do
You taught me to see
Not to see
But to really look deeper like you do
I already knew you'd
Leave me someday
With no cure
For the love that I had
From the moment I heard
-And from my first word, Mama
-Your first word, Mama
You shaped the boy I'd become
But the boy disappeared
Lost to the years
And the man you became
Is a beautiful one
Every bit still the same
Every bit still my son
But, oh, here we go with our words
And the battle's begun
And when the dust settles
I'm sick as I see what I've done
If I could just tell you that
You more than deserve
Those three little words I can't find
There is no other one
-You are my mother
-You are my son
You are mine
At times you rile me up
Just a little bit more than most do
You get on my nerves
And I'm sure that I get on yours
Surely we both do
Aren't we supposed to
Say what we're feeling
Instead, I'm concealing my heart
And just offering guile
And when you smile
It's my reflection
Mixed with everything I feel
All of my flaws
Look what I've caused to appear
Why can't I say
What you most need to hear?
Don't leave me stuck in the dark, dear
Oh, here we go with our words
And the battle's begun
And when the dust settles
I'm sick as I see what I've done
If I could just tell you that
You more than deserve
Those three little words I can't find
There is no other one
-You are my mother
-You are my son
You are mine
If I could just tell you that--
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