NCIS Los Angeles s05e02 Episode Script


Lear 251 Delta Lima, this is Burbank tower.
Do you read? Lear 251 Delta Lima, this is Burbank tower.
Do you read? Acknowledge, Lear 251 Delta Lima.
They're off course and under the glide slope.
Lear 251 Delta Lima, do you read? Come right to 020.
Delta Lima, do you read? It's seconds out.
Delta Lima, abort.
Delta Lima, abort! Delta Lima, abort! Abort! Run! LA 5x02 Original air date on October 1, 2013 How's he doing? Passed his evals, right? Oh, with flying colors.
So he's good to go.
Have you talked to Deeks? He appears to be screening my calls.
That's brazen.
Oh, my God.
Emoticon overload.
These guys from last night are kind of driving me nuts.
Which one? Jesse? Alex.
What is that? An ear of corn? A pickle? That actually looks like a-a Oh, my God, here's Jesse.
"Good morning, beautiful.
" "Well, good morning to you," smiley face.
You heard from all three? Haven't you? Uh, no.
My, uh, phone's off.
I mean, who came up with this Groupster thing anyway? You know, three times the rejection doesn't seem psychologically sound.
One-on-one is bad enough.
I know, but Rose was so excited, and, you know, she really needs to get out and meet guys.
Yeah, that have a pulse.
It's supposed to be fun.
Three guys, three girls, no pressure, no expectations.
I'm sorry.
Three's a crowd.
Is that a heart or a butt? You know what? Here's an example.
Three bears, burgled.
Three little piggies, houses obliterated.
Three blind mice, tails cut off.
I am telling you, people start killing each other when the equation is three.
Wonder if Rose got any calls.
Yeah, only if one of them dropped dead.
You're bad.
Case on deck.
Oh, here we go.
Haircut? No, I think it's a new shirt.
Wait a second.
Are those? Yep, I am wearing pants.
Sad face.
What, you got Old MacDonald's entire farm in there? Uh, it's just my mom.
Just her mom.
Well, well, well.
Look who's wearing big-boy pants.
Hetty got me these.
I mean, you still have the thongs, but it's a start.
Might as well be wearing a thong.
Stop whining.
Yes, ma'am.
Early this morning, a private jet, on its way from Washington, D.
, crashed at Burbank Airport.
There's no information as to why the plane went down, but at this early hour, it does appear no one on board survived.
What did air traffic control say? The tower lost contact with the jet upon approach.
The plane appeared to be on a collision course before veering off at the last moment, crashing.
Pilot error? Could have overshot the runway.
Maybe, or whoever was flying the plane had a clear target in mind.
Or maybe they missed a target.
It's who's on board that interests us.
Former Vice Admiral William Gardner.
He was a key player in the War on Terror.
Forced into early retirement ten months ago.
Gardner's uncensored criticism of the administration lost him his job and a seat on the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
What was he doing in L.
? According to this, he was brokering a book deal.
"Unbroken Warrior, a riveting account of the truth behind the headlines.
" Sam and I will check out the airport.
Kensi Uh, you'll be taking Kensi with you, Mr.
Oh, great, my third-wheel status made official.
Not today.
Sam has an appointment.
With who? That would be me.
Good morning.
You want me to see another shrink? Uh, I don't think Mr.
Getz is "another shrink.
" He knows you, your past.
And he knows I bounce back fast.
Even the most durable fabric wears out eventually.
Is that what you think, Hetty? You think I'm worn out? I worry that you will be if you don't take care of yourself.
Sit down, Mr.
I don't know what more you want from me, Hetty.
I passed my physical my psych assessment.
Have I ever told you about the time I went blind? It was in Cambodia.
I was so committed to my assignment that I went for weeks existing on little more than insects and lemongrass.
So when, at last, my target presented itself, I could barely see to complete my mission.
Vitamin A deficiency.
I take a multivitamin.
Oh, come on.
Sorry, Hetty.
I get it, but I wouldn't be here if I didn't think I could do a good job.
Then, your visit with Mr.
Getz will be a mere formality.
How'd you get your sight back? Carrots.
Always eat your carrots, Mr.
I know you were looking forward to getting back out with Sam.
Yeah, it's the same for you and Deeks.
Well, let's stay positive.
Good idea.
He won't return my calls.
Don't take it personally.
Sam's been staying close to home as well.
I couldn't get him to go to a Lakers game.
Yeah, I bought him a Cronut.
I had courtside You bought him a what? A Cronut.
It's a croissant-doughnut hybrid; Deeks loves them.
I can only get them in this little bakery in New York City, and I left it on his doorstep, and it's still there.
He'll be okay.
They both will.
I'm gonna call Eric, see if he spoke to the I.
Investigating the death of Vice Admiral Gardner.
Chief Howard, National Transportation Safety Board.
How are you? Good luck with that.
Come again? Take a look; not much left.
So you haven't been able to find anything that helps explain the crash? Well, actually, we've pretty much found everything except the one thing that could help.
The black box? The wreck area is pretty small.
But we can't find the box anywhere.
Really? Really.
Yeah, you think you can get onto those ATC computers? They're not your average laptops, Kensi.
I'm a geek, not a god.
Eric, okay, let us know what else you find.
guys confirmed the tower systems were operating properly.
Did the pilots give any indication that they were having problems? No, there was no response to any of the communication attempts.
Total radio silence.
I'm trying to get Eric to verify it, but something's got his panties in a twist.
Maybe it's his new pants.
Busy morning.
Is that your, uh, your mom again? A friend.
Friend of you and Kensi's? Yeah, just someone I hung out with last night.
With Kensi? On a date? I don't mean a date with Kensi.
You know what I mean.
Like, Kensi and the guy she's into, you and the guy you're into.
Not into him, not into any of them, and neither is Kensi.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, them? Yeah, okay, there's three of them and three of us, but we only went because Rose really needs to get out more, so Oh, Rose came, too.
Yeah, it was like a girls' night.
Ah, girls' night with guys.
Who we are not into.
And yet you hung out with them all evening.
Hey, so should we move this interrogation into the boatshed? Oh, sorry, just, uh, curious how this whole thing works.
Why? 'Cause you want to go on one? What? Oh, on a date? Whoa, with you? No, no.
With, like, other people.
Just, come on, not with me.
I mean, that's three times the heartache, right? For them, I mean.
right,ring on the questions.
Is that what you want? Me running through a list of questions, seeing if any of them trigger you? Trigger me? I'm a ticking time bomb? Well, is that how you feel? I feel fine.
It's just everybody acts like I'm gonna explode.
In what way? You know, tiptoeing around, "watching for signs.
" Can you blame us? You went through quite an ordeal.
I've been through a lot worse.
That's not how trauma works, Sam.
Somebody might survive a tsunami no problem, only to be scarred for life by a trip to the dentist.
You might not want to use that example on Deeks.
Look, Sam, you and I both know you're more than well-equipped to handle this, and you've got a great support network here.
The other night, Michelle and I got into it over whose turn it was to do the dishes.
That sounds normal.
She wouldn't let me do 'em.
That sound normal to you? It sounds like she cares.
And Callen got us these amazing tickets at the Lakers game.
Probably sold a kidney for 'em.
Did you go? No, it didn't feel right.
Because he's being too nice to you? Everybody is.
It's like they're trying to make me feel better when I'm fine.
Remember to relax and concentrate on the next exercise.
You must breathe very slowly.
Fill what is empty and empty what is full.
Fill what is empty and empty what is full.
I am the universe.
I am the universe.
My head is relaxing.
My head is relaxing.
My arms are relaxing.
My arms are relaxing.
My abdomen is relaxing.
My abdomen is relaxing.
Relax the buttocks.
Relax the buttocks.
What am I doing? Clench, release.
Clench, release.
Clench, release.
Clench, release.
I am one with the universe.
I am one with the universe.
God, Hetty, what are you doing? Well, I thought I'd brave the monsoon to come check on you.
Storm sounds-- supposed to make it easier to fall asleep, so You having trouble sleeping? Yeah, I'd say I have a little case of insomnia.
Probably all that clenching and releasing.
Wow-wow-wow- wow-wow-wow-wow, you've been busy.
Well, when you don't sleep, you realize how many hours there are in the day you have to fill.
Well, if you're bored perhaps you could come back to work.
I didn't even know that you were, um, I didn't know you were coming.
If I knew Do, do you want something? Do you want some milk? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, I-I can't stay long.
I just came to see if your phone was working.
missed calls.
Fancy that.
Like you said, I've been busy.
So has Kensi.
For the past few weeks.
Without a partner.
I'm gonna need a decision soon.
Especially if I need to find a replacement.
Of course.
I'll leave you to your storm.
Hopefully it'll pass without too much damage.
Feel your troubles melting away as you drift off to a world abstract.
I'll show you, Hetty.
Oh! Hello.
Uh, did you ever hear of knocking? Sorry.
Last I checked, this was the burn room, not the locker room.
What are you doing? What's it look like I'm doing? Something really weird? Are those your pants? Uh no.
Oh, my God! Those are not my pants.
I do not own pants.
Those are Hetty's pants.
Interesting, and you were going to incinerate them? Do you have a death wish? I didn't have a choice.
Did you have an accident? Ew, no.
Those things are driving me nuts, they're so constrictive.
It's like my legs are trapped in a straitjacket.
Eric, they're pants.
People have been wearing them for thousands of years.
Oh, no, no, not my people.
The Beales of the Clan McBeale.
And now you're Scottish? As heather and haggis.
So why don't you wear a kilt? I do.
I did.
I used to.
Until this little incident with Hetty.
It's easy to forget how short she is.
Her eye line is lower than you think.
Yup, got it! Thanks.
Okay, I suggest you take your bag-o-pants and put them back on your body before Hetty finds out, or else it'll be your butt in the incinerator.
And there was a last-minute passenger added to the flight's manifest.
Jason Carter? How do I know that name? Jason Carter was a journalist.
He had written a number of high profile pieces on a variety of different topics.
He was even nominated for a Pulitzer for an article he wrote on hydraulic fracturing and the oil companies.
That's how I know him.
For the past year or so, he had been writing about the war in Afghanistan, embedding himself in several different units.
Maybe he was interviewing the vice admiral on the flight.
Reasonable assumption.
So I contacted his publisher.
Turns out, he was the ghost writer for the admiral's memoir.
Somebody didn't want this book being published.
Listen, Nate.
I wouldn't jeopardize Callen and the rest of the team if I didn't think I could hold my own.
Look, I appreciate that, Sam, and I believe you.
In fact, I know you put your partner and the rest of the team above your own safety.
Okay, then you know pretty much all there is to know.
Hetty doesn't think so.
Then, maybe you should go talk to Hetty.
You know, you're probably right.
Is that it? I'm only here because Hetty worries about you.
Nate The only way to survive is to let go.
I keep a little something behind in case there's a chance to escape or attack, but the rest of me is gone.
I see 'em wailing on that guy in the chair.
I can't help him.
When it's over, I reconnect.
And the only thing left are some scars.
I'm afraid one day I may drift off and never reconnect.
Then what happens to the guy in the chair? Yeah? Special Agent Callen.
Special Agent Blye, NCIS.
We were wondering if we could take a look inside of Jason Carter's apartment.
Yeah, I guess.
I heard he died.
Nice guy.
Good tenant.
This have anything to do with the fire? I'm sorry, the fire? In his apartment.
The place was gutted day before yesterday.
Fire marshal said it could take a week or more to determine what happened.
Had a insurance company out here this morning.
They wanted to take a look, too.
Not much left.
Fortunately nobody was home at the time.
This guy's had a bit of a run of bad luck, huh? This is Jason's girlfriend.
Julie, these are the agents from, um NCIS.
His insurance company? No Naval Criminal Investigative Service.
Shall we? Yeah.
Need a hand? Oh.
Thank you.
I didn't even know Jason was on his way home until I saw the message on my phone.
What did the message say? Just that he was able to get a ride back to L.
with the vice admiral, and was gonna use the time to interview him.
I fell asleep waiting up for him.
I kept expecting him to crawl into bed and kiss me good night.
When I woke up in the morning and he wasn't there, I knew something was wrong.
And he wasn't answering his phone, so I came here and the fire department was just leaving.
I was standing here, already in shock when the police called to tell me Jason was killed in the plane crash.
Uh, four days ago.
He give you any indication that something might've been wrong? He seemed a little stressed maybe? Callen? Excuse me.
So, super wasn't kidding when he said the place was gutted.
Forensics will be able to tell us more, but the fire was hot and fast.
Pro job.
Julie? Do you know anybody that would've wanted to hurt Jason? No.
Some of his articles earned him hate mail.
Did he tell you what he was currently working on? No, he didn't talk much about work.
Did he ever give you anything to keep for him? No.
Why, do you think something he was working on played a part in his death? We're considering a lot of possibilities.
Please tell me your presence here is because of your excitement over a startling and revealing piece of valuable evidence that solves this case.
Well You know what, I'll settle for a run-of-the-mill clue.
Actually, I have more bad news.
Is it worse than Jason Carter's apartment being torched? Virtually.
What is it? Virtually.
What? Virtually.
I think he's stuck.
I knew Hetty was a robot, but now him? No virtually as in cyberspace.
As in somebody's been scrubbing through his electronic life.
As in they hijacked his cloud and wiped it clean an hour after he died.
As in they hijacked his cloud This is some serious voodoo.
I'm talking black bag kung fu, ninja warrior assassin level hacking.
Do you have any idea what he's saying? I really don't, but I think it's bad.
Either that or his motherboard was fried.
So, who do we know with this level of cyber warcraft? I may have a guy.
This is the security cam footage from the airport.
And I think this is the black box.
See? That's why we didn't find it, because somebody stole it.
Why would someone steal a plane's flight recorder? Million-dollar question.
No, the million-dollar question is why is it called the black box if it's always orange? If somebody wanted to find out what happened to the aircraft in its last few moments.
Or if they didn't want someone to know.
Then they would get away in the confusion.
And I believe the same vehicle entered the airport just 24 hours earlier.
See? Plain, inconspicuous.
They probably parked it in a hangar and then re-skinned it as an emergency vehicle.
And then all they had to do was wait for the crash to happen.
So they show up on the scene as emergency workers, and when everyone else is busy, they walk off with the flight recorder.
Which also means that they knew that the crash was going to happen.
Which proves it was sabotage.
I'm running the hangar rental and owner lists now, but still no luck facial rec-ing these guys.
Okay, what about the vehicle? Working on that, too.
I doubt you're gonna find it.
These guys haven't left much to chance.
Someone deliberately crashes their plane in what was described as a aborted kamikaze flight into the tower.
There could have been a struggle on board.
Hijacking and a struggle would be the most logical explanation.
But all of these guys are top-drawer.
None of them have anything in their profile or background that would even remotely suggest that they could be responsible for this.
Which is where our black-box-stealing, mystery emergency workers come in.
Could they be responsible for the sabotage? It's not likely.
The plane originated in Washington.
They would have had to have sabotaged it a few days before to have been waiting here.
Which would suggest accomplices.
This is starting to sound like a conspiracy nut's fantasy.
Only this might be real.
- Okay, good luck.
- Thank you.
How was the zoo? Did you get a churro? That's funny.
It's a good one.
Hey, you sure you want him back? Can I have the rest of the week to think about it? Ha-ha.
So, just give me the greatest hits.
He's as stubborn as he is big.
I consider both of those to be assets in an agent.
And they don't make them any tougher.
That's also why he's here.
But the trauma and damage he experienced, it's cumulative, physically and psychologically, as you well know.
If it happens too many more times, he could reach a breaking point where he can't take it anymore.
You also know what can happen then.
Thank you, Nate.
Now could you turn your attentions to Detective Deeks? Anything I should know? I don't want him back if he's not the man he was.
So, what'd Nate have to say? Ah, same old shrink mumbo jumbo.
"You ever have sexual fantasies about your mom? You ever wear her clothes when she's not home?" That sort of thing? What? The hell are you talking about? He asked you that kind of stuff before? Yeah, but I mean, that's normal shrink stuff.
Are you messing with me? I'm not messing with you.
Don't be messing with me on my first day back, man.
Anyone hear an explosion prior to the plane crash? No and no sign of any sort of explosive devices from what I can see.
This all happened from this plane hitting the ground at several hundred miles per hour.
With a crew with a flawless record.
In a plane that was just as safe.
What do you got? Looks like it was a digital recorder in its former life.
Well? I'm not sure.
I mean, it's digital, so it should be there.
It's just a matter of the damage.
What else? Afghanistan never conquered by a foreign army.
The Russians learned the hard Absolutely not not at war with Afghanistan.
the country trying to weed out persistent terrorists, bastards to Pakistan.
semantics? What would it take to put? Money money and more troops private contractors billions.
Whoa, what was that when he said "money, private contractors"? Can you dig it out more? I can try.
Same said of military.
Our people properly trained.
Theirs are not.
They're a risk that re lots cover-ups.
Sounded like he said "cover-ups.
" risk that re lots cover-ups.
Hell proof of what considered war crimes.
That's it.
He was talking about war crimes being committed.
Without the entire recording, we can only ever guess what was actually said, but that's what it sounded like to me, too.
Well, if you had proof that Americans with war contracts committed atrocities overseas while employed by the U.
government, I'd say there are those who would kill to keep that buried.
You need to hear this.
Let me guess-- you're stuck in traffic.
Uh, hi, Hetty.
No, I-I thought you were going to be Deeks.
No, he hasn't showed yet.
In fact, he's not answering his phone calls or e-mails.
An amateur plane spotter and his buddy sent this to the Burbank Police Department.
Yeah, they were parked here, listening in on the tower, when they picked up on this from a different radio frequency.
Lear 251 Delta Lima, this is Burbank tower.
Do you read? Tower said they never responded.
They thought they were responding to the tower, but they actually weren't.
Burbank tower.
Lear 251 Delta Lima.
We have you loud and clear.
Little foggy down there.
That's the pilot of Admiral Gardner's plane.
Delta Lima, we're still above minimums here, unbroken with a 300-foot ceiling.
If that's not the tower, then who the hell is it? Roger.
Glad to hear.
I don't know, I ran it Burbank tower, I may have some instrument issues.
Altimeter isn't matching my other displays.
Computer's got me at a thousand feet and altimeter is reading 750.
Altimeter setting is 2886.
We have you descending through 900 feet.
Glide slope is spot-on.
Come left to 024 degrees.
You're cleared to land.
Look out, look out, pull up, pull up! We're going down! Three seconds later they crashed.
Somebody intercepted the tower's radio system as well as that of the plane.
And were able to sabotage the jet's instrument system.
Like I said serious voodoo.
So, an outspoken navy admiral is speaking with a journalist known for controversial stories.
And they want to keep him quiet so they kill the admiral and the writer Making it look like a plane crash Wiping out any evidence of what the journalist was doing.
And we have nothing but a few seconds of interview.
What if the journalist gave his girlfriend copies of his work for safekeeping? But he didn't.
Maybe those responsible don't know that.
More evidence is surfacing about the fiery plane crash in Burbank yesterday that killed retired Navy Vice Admiral Gardner.
Another victim has been identified as controversial journalist Jason Carter.
According to sources close to Carter, he was worried about his own safety recently because of the story he was working on, excerpts of which have been released by his girlfriend.
The following conversation between Carter and the vice admiral is believed to have been recorded just moments before the fatal crash.
Our people are properly trained.
Theirs are not.
They're a security risk that resulted in lots of cover-ups.
Hell, we've even seen proof of what would be considered war crimes.
The investigation into the crash that killed Vice Admiral Gardner and Jason Carter is ongoing, and this latest development suggests this story is far from over.
Will this be enough to draw them out? Whoever's responsible went to extremes to bury this.
I doubt they have any intentions of stopping now.
Our people are properly trained.
Theirs are not.
They're a security risk that resulted in lots of cover-ups.
Hell, we've even seen proof of what would be considered war crimes.
What else do you want to know? Afghanistan has never been conquered by a foreign army.
The Russians learned that the hard way.
What are we waiting for? Let's go.
You put a surveillance camera inside a garden gnome? Yeah, we call it the Hetty-cam.
Hey now, these guys are real pros.
Wouldn't you say so, Hetty? I could say many things, many, many.
Look, they're picking the lock.
Absolutely not the same situation.
We're not at war with Afghanistan.
We're in the country trying to weed out persistent terrorists, bastards who migrated to Pakistan.
Isn't that just semantics? What would it really take to put an end to? Money.
It'd take more money and more troops, but we're inundated with private contractors who waste billions.
They call Washington corrupt; these bastards take the cake.
So now you're talking about multinational corporations.
I've had my flu shot.
What the? Kitty Corner? I only read it for the articles.
Federal agent.
Don't even think about it.
What'd I just say? You're still thinking about it.
"What if I distract him with the magazine, dive for cover, draw, and fire?" That might work, but they'd fill you full of holes.
Good call.
Wish you were out there? No such thing as a bad day in the water.
I came.
Even had my hand on the door.
I don't know what happened, I just couldn't come in.
Pretty sure you'd feel better if we talked.
Pretty sure I wouldn't.
Look even though I'm here at Hetty's request, and well, I've got my own opinions, the only one who matters in all this is you.
I have no agenda beyond making sure you're in the best place you can be right now.
And how can you possibly know what that place is when I don't even know? Perspective? Seldom do we know what we need for ourselves.
What I need is sleep.
Why do you think you can't sleep? Because every time I close my eyes, my mind just keeps running.
With what? All sorts of stuff, man.
The abduction? Yes, the abduction.
Torture? The abduction torture, when I was shot falling off my bike when I was eight years old, stepping on a bee, nursery rhymes, grocery lists, infomercials.
It's like someone took all my memories and just put 'em into a blender.
You went through a traumatic experience.
Yeah, but this is not my first traumatic experience.
No, but maybe something about this one had more impact.
Your brain could be trying to make sense of what happened by comparing it to past experiences, but you got nothing that comes close, so it's working a little harder to resolve it.
Okay, so how long's this supposed to last? I don't think I have a definitive answer for that, but the more you talk about it out here, the less you're gonna have to work on it in here.
So, what, in the meantime, I just walk around with the mind of a schizophrenic? I don't think you have to worry about being a You know, it's funny, 'cause I already get the Shaggy jokes and how I'm halfway to homeless.
You know, what's crazy is that I see these guys and I hear them talking to themselves and it's scaring the hell out of me because if I were to say what's going on in my mind, it wouldn't be that different.
Well, that's the real difference.
You're worried about it.
I'd be more concerned if you weren't.
So I'm not crazy? Not yet.
If you don't start getting some sleep, you're gonna start to act and feel like it.
What about Kensi? What about her? You two obviously have something special.
Who told you that? You're partners.
That's a special relationship.
Look at Callen and Sam.
Right, of course.
What is it about your partnership that's unique? What do you mean? What do you mean, "unique"? Different from Callen and Sam or the others.
What's the one ingredient you'd say makes your partnership distinct from the rest? I don't know.
Well once you can answer that truthfully to yourself, everything else will become much clearer.
They're not talking.
Lawyered up before we could zip-tie 'em.
Both are former Special Forces.
Both work for D7-- it's a private company with a couple of billion in government contracts supplying support services in hot spots around the world.
Yeah, we've already called in for a search warrant.
The evidence we'd need will be long gone by then, if it isn't already.
We have to work with what we have.
Well, the guys in the boatshed are small fish.
They're well-trained, they're well-funded, but they didn't order this.
That was somebody higher up.
Somebody who has access to technology that allows them to intercept air traffic control and sabotage a private jet's in-flight computer.
Yeah, Hetty, this is a lot bigger than we initially thought.
I mean, we're talking war crimes by private contractors.
We'll get them, but today you caught two small fish, and sometimes small fish are the most perfect bait for big fish.
This is far from over.
You did well today.
Eric even managed to keep his pants on.
You can drop them off at wardrobe.
I can go back to wearing shorts? For a while.
It's a process.
I want a job where it's an accomplishment to leave my pants on.
I have sensitive thighs.
Oh He has sensitive thighs.
- Yeah.
- Hey, come on, guys.
Guys, it's not funny-- it's like restless legs syndrome times a zillion.
Good luck with that.
I'm dead.
I'm the one who cut them.
I couldn't bear to see you suffer.
What are we gonna do? Looks like we're going shopping, Beale.
So what's the good word on our Mr.
Deeks? He's hurting.
Can he return to work? Yes.
Whether he will or not is a question for him.
He's not sleeping.
He can't work through this if he doesn't get some rest.
And his partner? It's a complicated relationship.
Aren't they all? You asked me if he could come back to work.
And now I'm asking you about his relationship with Kensi.
Are you playing semantics with me? He's very close to his partner.
Too close to return? I'm co-- I'm co.
I've been calling.
Yeah, I think I must have had my phone off.
Guess what reopened.
Is that Yummy Yummy Heart Attack? Yep, three Fs from the health department and still going strong.
Yeah, if "F" stood for "fabulous.
" Did you get the, uh, Drunken Pigs? With extra kimchi-- you're welcome.
I think I just felt a shiver.
Want me to, uh, grab something to drink? Oh, no, no, no, no, I have got you covered, my friend.
Wow, one day you are going to make somebody the perfect personal assistant.
Got a fork? I got a spork.
Yeah, yeah, you do.
All right.
Oh, I have been waiting for this-- the smell in the car Oh, are you kidding me? I forgot how good this was.
This is so good.
You think it's bad for us? Hmm, ah, you only live once, ha.
Yeah, probably a lot shorter when you eat like this.
You got napkins? Uh-huh.
Is that dessert? Uh, no, it's nothing.
You got me a Cronut? Um, I did, but that was a while ago, and I left it at your doorstep, so that's old, don't eat it.
N-N-N-No, d-don't throw it away.
It's the thought that counts-- I'm gonna frame this thing.
You're so weird.
I mean, look at that.
It's like America and France made slow, sweet love and then had a pastry baby.
Sure you don't want a bite? No, seriously it's been out there for a while.
I'll probably still eat that.
So, Burnt Offerings is on at 11:00.
It's the bottom of the eighth I don't really know if I'm up for a movie.
Oh, yes, you are because I cannot watch this alone.
It is rated triple-B.
What's that? Blood, breasts, and beasts.
What was the last one? Beasts.
Well, you know how I like big beasts.
Either way, you're watching it with me.
I thought you loved horror movies.
I do, just not by myself.
Watch it with me.
Watch it with me? Watch it with me.
You won me over with the pastry, baby.
Awesome, okay.
Want to use my cat pillow? It's pink, very masculine.
So Oliver Reed and Karen Black move into this mansion with their son and their elderly aunt, played by Bette Davis, who I absolutely love, and then Burgess Meredith, who played Mickey in the Rocky films-- it was so sad when he dies, oh, my God, it's the best scene ever-- um, and his sister play the caretakers of this mansion, and then their mother-- she's like an elderly recluse in the attic, and then flying monkeys from The Wizard of Oz show up with guns, and there's a big shoot-out.
Mm, those monkeys are scary.
What happens next? It's a love story.
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