Newsreaders (2013) s02e01 Episode Script

F-Dancing, Are You Decent?

Tonight on "Newsreaders" what's in this box? The answer may guitar you.
Also, we'll meet the first openly gay interior designer.
And later, humorous Jim Davidson will be here.
I'll tell you the problem I have with Rubik's cube Yeah, sure, it's easy to get one side, but then when you turn this other thing and then it messes up this part.
All that and more tonight on "Newsreaders.
" Newsreaders - 02x01 "F-Dancing, Are You Decent?" But first tonight Remember when dirty dancing was no more than dry-humping until you could get home and do some wet-humping in your parents' basement? Well, these days, kids are doing a new kind of dirty dancing.
It's called f dancing The Lindy, the Charleston, the Twist, the Electric Slide, Dancing? Dancing isn't just dirty dancing.
It is having actual sex in public, while partially clothed, to the beat of the kind of music that people like to to.
Dancing has its roots in the Brazilian dance "Danca Pora," which began in the clubs of Rio de Janeiro and translates roughly to "Dance .
" In America, the dance is mostly popular with popular teenagers.
Teenagers like Josh, Hilary, and Ashley of Tipton Hamilton High School.
- It's just dancing.
- Some critics say that Dancing is just "The Macarena" with actual.
How do you guys feel about that? - I mean, it uses the hips, but - It's not, like, anything like the same.
It's not like No.
The controversy at Tipton High started last month when Josh and Hilary's routine, high-school marching band turned this normal half-time show into this impromptu dancing routine, making the field unplayable.
And this led school officials to threaten to cancel the prom.
It's the biggest night of our lives, and they're just trying - to take it away.
It's just a dance, bro.
- But do you see why some people are saying it's sexual in nature, bro? It's just dancing, people.
Get over it.
In this battle of young versuls old, the kids do have supporters.
Those supporters are crazy, old hippies.
We have two teenagers of our own, and we let them dance - with their friends in our home.
- All the time.
No one's getting hurt.
- There's no drugs or alcohol involved.
- Unless you count the intoxicating effects of music.
And I know we do.
Right, love? I'm trying to nod, but you're sitting on my hair.
There's only one thing about dancing that everyone can seem to agree on.
This dance that was once something only cool kids did has caught on with people of all ages.
And levels of cool.
The dance has become so popular that a new reality show, "Dancing With The Stars," became America's highest-rated show.
Erica and Tim, you've done something few people can do.
You transported me to a place I have never been, and that's what Dancing is all about.
"Hoff" gives you a 9.
In the end, the senior prom went on as planned.
But the students didn't have much interest in Dancing because Dancing wasn't cool anymore and everybody was doing it.
- Oh, my God! - So, how do you guys feel watching your parents Dancing together? They're not even dancing together! That is my dad with Josh's mom! Your mom's a good dancer.
Bro, I said your mom's a good dancer.
There are few issues harder to come to grips with than racial bias.
Actually, there are tons of issues harder to come to grips with failing your children, moving is hard, stealing money from your anti-drug charity to pay for heroin.
It's a long list.
But racial bias is an issue.
And it is the subject of tonight's hidden-camera investigation, "Are You Decent?" America is a melting pot.
And it's this diversity that makes us so great.
But has our pot finally melted into the goo of tolerance envisioned by our forefathers, the ones who didn't own slaves? Professor Pritchard Batchman, who's been studying racial bias since television news reporters began framing news segments around it, says yes.
Yes! My data indicates we are living in a post-racial America.
So this is a unique moment in our history? Actually, no.
This is the second time that we have lived in a post-racial America.
- Really? - Yes! Yes! The first time was January of 1863.
The slaves were emancipated.
We lived in a post-racial America for about two days.
Then the novelty wore off, we forgot that we liked black people and we remembered that we have hatred in our hearts.
So, what we are experiencing today is different? Yes! There is a lot a lot Of cultural data that suggests that this is an actual post-racial America.
And I think this one will stick.
The strongest evidence, of course, being that we have a black president.
I had not thought of that.
- Really? - Yeah.
No.
That's huge.
Yeah.
How would I have not thought of that? That's weird, isn't it? - That's a pretty big deal.
- Yeah.
Most Americans will tell you they aren't racist.
But what if you don't ask them, and, like a really scummy boyfriend, you secretly tape them? That's exactly what we did by setting up dozens of hidden cameras in this park to see how people actually react when confronted with racial minorities.
Hello.
I'm Harold Perrineau from "Lost" , "The Best Man Holiday", and tons of other things.
I will be playing the African-American.
We asked Harold to approach potential racists to see how they'd react.
'Sup.
- The results shocked us.
- Can I play with your dog? Yeah.
- Can I borrow your phone? - Sure.
It looked as though ordinary people were comfortable around our minority.
Excuse me, ma'am.
Clavis Kim with "Newsreaders: Are You Decent?" Were you aware that the man you were talking to was black? Yes.
You lent him your phone.
Why would you do that? I have an unlimited plan.
Well, sure, if one of the stars of the hit TV show "Lost" approached me, I'd probably give him my phone.
- Yeah, I'm such a huge fan.
- Oh.
- Thanks, man.
- Can I take another one? - Uh, if you Yeah, sure.
Let's do it.
Come on, why not? All right.
But what if we disguised Harold to look less like a famous TV actor and much more threatening? Hey, can I borrow your wallet? Oh, excuse me, ma'am.
Could you help me pull this couch into my, uh, party bus? Okay.
What? No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I don't No, you can't.
You can't just help a random Look, this is not even real.
Look at that.
Do you know what could happen to you? We decided to challenge America even further by making Harold appear even more threatening.
It's so big over there.
If this is a post-racial America, someone certainly forgot to tell Mary and Harris Burlkovisi.
Go! - Racist! - Excuse me.
Clavis Kim, "Newsreaders: Are You Decent?" We were secretly recording you just now.
Oh, thank God.
Did you see that monster that just jumped out at us? "Monster.
" Racism is never surprising, but - nothing stings like the "M" word.
- He was tall and athletic.
- He looked like he could jump high.
- Athletic.
That's a code word for black.
We decided to shake up the scenario even further.
Blaaah! You are racist! Got that It's 2014, but you'd never know it by the way that these people reacted to people who looked different from them.
- Aaaah! Ha ha ha! - Whoa! What the Oh, it finally happened! Undead zombie clowns! - No, no, no.
I'm not - Go for the head! Not the head! I'm just kidding! I'm just African-American! One thing that's harder than ever these days is knowing what's cool.
Unless you know skip reming.
All my grandson Ripley likes to do is play "Angry Birds" all day on his iPod.
I told him, "in my day, you wanted to play with an Angry Bird, you went outside and got a birdy angry.
" He said that didn't sound cool at all.
It's funny how what's cool changes over time.
When I was in short pants, stealing apples and grave robbing were all the rage.
Same goes for rage.
But, hands down, the coolest thing a young boy could do was littering.
And I was the most popular kid in town.
By the time I was in my late teens, draft dodging and free love had become the cool things to do.
But I didn't jump on that Bandwagon.
No, skip reming was hitched to a different cart, one driven by a North Vietnamese farmer plowing the yam field of my own despair.
Well, you want to know what cool is? Cool is a tight herringbone tweed.
And cool is being confident in yourself and never letting anyone else define who you are.
Unless that person has a cool hat or is a better race than you in which case copy everything they do until you feel comfortable enough to murder them and take their place.
Finally tonight, we have one correction.
Last week, we reported that both hip-hop and anal sex were created in a British boarding school.
We have since learned that hip-hop was invented in America.
We regret the error.
I'm Reagan Biscayne.
Good night.

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