Packed to the Rafters (2008) s01e08 Episode Script

Taking the Lead

BEN: Sometimes it's that moment right before you wake up that's the most exciting.
What part of your life's gonna start when you open your eyes? How's the story gonna unfold once you kick off the covers? And, more importantly, whose bed are you in? Mmm! (SNORES) You're in my bed.
Yep.
We didn't, did we'? (SIGHS) Either that or we stripped off for a quiet lie-down.
How did this happen? Vodka.
And tequila shots.
Soso what happens now'? You go back to your room while I lie here and quietly die.
No, now that this has happened I'm not doing 'friends with benefits', if that's what you're hoping.
No, no, no, no.
I don't want any complications.
We're housemates, Ben.
This can't happen again.
We're better off as friends.
And Carbo can't know.
He won't hear it from me.
I don't know what's worse - the fact that she doesn't want me or that I probably had the best night of my life and cant remember it.
You're leaching alcohol from your pores.
CAR BO: Ben! Melissa! Benny! Hello? Do you guys want a coffee, or what? Are you guys up yet'? Hello! The offer's going to be withdrawn in a second.
Jeez, mate.
You right? Up and at 'em.
Did you hear me asking about coffee? No, 'cause I did the hadso, no.
Why are you acting so weird? I'm not.
I just I had a big night.
Oh, you reckon? Couldn't half tell by the way you two banged your way through the house last night.
Next time, keep the noise down.
Noise? Tried the key in the door for five minutes, then hit every wall coming in.
Poor Melissa.
I thought she was carrying you.
Next time, no noise getting home.
Got it.
So, uh, what happened to that coffee? Check out the pash rash! It is not.
Bull! I know a pash rash when I see it.
Give us a squiz.
Get out of my face.
You scored quite the tongue-lashing last night.
Check it out, Benno! At least one of us is getting some action.
Whoa, that guy must be a good kisser.
You're a lucky g Where's that coffee? Yeah, righto.
Not funny.
What was I supposed to say? It won't happen again.
Believe me.
Yeah, you already said.
Bummer.
We're out of milk.
I think there's some UHT in the pantry.
CAR BO: Yeah, mate! If we're gonna be living under the same roof, this can't happen again.
No more drinking together, no more partying together and definitely Uh, Melissa, you want one? Yeah, that'd be great.
Thanks.
So, friends? Yep.
Right, who wants the 'High maintenance' mug? Yeah? WOMAN: Oi! You seen Julie? Nuh.
We're supposed to be going for a walk and she's not answering the door.
Haven't seen her.
What's your name again? Carbo, Carport'? Carbo.
If you're wanting to hot up that engine I wouldn't be doing that.
What? No, you need to beef up the suspension, overhaul the carburettor.
You get that right, you'll have a hell of a machine on your hands.
You a revhead? I am when it comes to Chargers.
(LAUGHS) What? I just didn't pick you.
'Cause women aren't supposed to know anything about cars.
I don't meet many who do.
Maybe you're not meeting the right women.
You can say that again.
(LAUGHS) You, uh, gonna give me a spin in this beautiful machine of yours? Try and stop me.
See, this is good.
I can handle friends.
I can handle pretty much anything Melissa throws at me, especially when she looks like a bush pig around the house.
I mean, talk about making it easy for a guy to NOT be interested.
What are you reading? You wouldn't be interested.
Course I would.
I love reading about 'Bikini Bods: Secrets of the Stars'.
Right Hey, no-one wants to be the fat fatty at the beach, yeah? Look, I just like switching off my brain sometimes.
Yeah, yeah.
Of course.
I wasn't judging you or anything.
You fancy a beer? Orwhatever'? Something stronger? Even if the hangover fairy wasn't hitting my skull with a hammer, we both agreed that was a bad idea.
Right.
So that'sthat's a no.
That's a firm no.
Raiding the pantry, Ben.
Now, there's a change.
If Mum didn't want me to eat it, she wouldn't keep making my favourite.
Well, you better give me a slice, then.
Where is your mum'? I'm just returning the keys.
Oh, scamming cake again? Surprise, surprise.
Hello, Grandad.
Mwah.
Afternoon, love.
I'm not scamming.
I just needed a breather from home.
Oh, why'? Hanging out with Melissa.
Hello! Oh, not like that! Oh, please.
Tell me there's another way you two hang out.
The sexual tension is unbearable.
It's just a mates thing.
You know, having a chat, shooting the breeze, catching up on the sex lives of Hollywood stars.
We're reading girlie mags.
No, not that kind of girlie mags, Grandad.
You know, the ones with thethe clothes Fashion? Fashion, hairdos.
Um, celebrities that look gross without make-up on.
Oh, I am onto you.
What? You're being wonderful, aren't you? JULIE: Oh, hi, Dad.
Hi, love.
What are you two plotting? Private conversation, Mum.
Oh, well, if you want dinner tonight you can put up with me being in the kitchen, thanks.
(WHISPERS) Come on.
Just returning the keys, love.
Hmm'? Oh, no, Dad.
Keep them.
You don't have to knock every time you come to visit.
You sure? Yeah! While you're at it, why don't you stay for dinner? I miss having you around.
You are trying to get into Melissa's pants by being the best guy-friend she'll ever have.
Oh, as if! Oh, please.
It's the ultimate tactic.
You're gonna hang around with her, pretend to be interested in all the girlie stuff she's interested in and then, when she comes crying to you about some moron who's dumped her, you're gonna stick your tongue in her ear! Oh, graphic! Tell me I'm wrong.
You are SO wrong.
Oh, actually, I am quite impressed.
You know, if you really wanna get into Melissa's pants, there are definitely worse ways you could go about it.
Really? So I am right! Oh, you are really barking up the wrong tree with this one.
Melissa and I are just mates, alright? You guys having some 'romance 101"? Hit me.
Dad, please, Ben needs advice, not puns.
I can offer more than just word play.
Yeah, you could tell him all about the love secrets of Mr Suburbia and his handy electrical tips.
I tell you, there's a lot a man can do for a woman with a spark plug and a generator.
Ignore the man who hasn't been on a date in 25 years.
Your big sister knows what she's talking about.
Just keep on being wonderful.
So, according to Rachel, I had to play things by the book.
No room for improvising.
Carbo, however, seemed to have not only ignored the rule book but thrown the whole thing out the window.
(FUNKY MUSIC PLAYS) Oh, listen to that engine purr.
You've done a superb job with this.
Haven't even shown you what she can do yet.
Any reason why not? Just being polite.
Don't wanna scare you.
(LAUGHS) Well, don't hold back on my part.
Famous last words.
Do you want me to drive? In your dreams, lady.
(LAUGHS) Hold onto your jocks.
Feel like watching a movie? Think there's an '80s trash marathon on, if you're interested in four hours of T I didn't know there was a dress code for the couch.
I'm going out.
What was that about a trash marathon? Uh, nothing.
It's tomorrow night.
So, uh, where are we off to? Come on.
Totally up for a night out.
Just let me get changed.
Should I go, uh, 'dancey' or 'restauranty'? Seriously, Ben, we agreed.
No more partying together.
We're just friends, remember? I guess you're coming.
(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYS) So, how'd I do? You drive like a man! Oh, thanks.
Hey, it's a compliment.
In fact, you should be honoured.
You're the first ever chick I let drive the beast.
Oh.
Oooh, I should probably go and see Julie.
She'll be looking for me.
No, they'll be having tea by now and she'd be PO'd at the interruption.
(LAUGHS) Never get between that woman and her penne.
Hey, uh, why don't you come in'? Really? Yeah, I mean, if you thought the Charger was good, you're gonna flip out when you see what else I've got.
(LOUNGE MUSIC PLAYS) You right for a drink? Hello? Free beverage, yes or no? Sure.
Are you looking for someone? Not exactly.
There you are.
Oh, hello.
Hi.
Ben, this is Heath.
Heath, Ben.
So I'm either the wingman helping her out on a date or being paraded in front of a mate for appraisal.
Either way, it's best behaviour time, Rafter.
Heath, how's it going'? Yeah, good.
Heath works with me.
He's a mate.
I'm being paraded.
Lucky enough to share a ward.
On a good day we share lunch.
He's competition.
I'm a wingman.
You guys want a drink? I was just heading to the bar.
OK.
Did you want some cash'? Nah, nah, nah.
It's on me.
So what do we reckon? Shooters, or beers? I'm up for a beer, if you're buying.
Um, you don't want a hand, do you? Actually that'd be great.
So you've worked with Melissa for a while? No, not long.
She's great, though.
Yeah, she is.
How do you guys know each other? I live with her.
Oh.
Like'? Nah, nah, nah.
We're just housemates.
OK, so you're not her boyfriend, then? No, no.
Just friends.
Close friends.
Great.
He is a contender.
Bugger.
I can handle this.
If he's making a play, good luck to him.
It's not like he's gonna kick a goal on his first David Beckham, eat your heart out.
Um, sorry to interrupt.
No worries, mate.
Do you wanna sit? Actually, I might just dance.
Could you excuse us for a sec? Look, I'm sorry.
Why'? It's no skin off my nose if you wanna get busy with a workmate.
Personally, I wouldn't screw the crew, but that's just my opinion.
But you're quite happy to screw your housemates? We don't work together.
I really didn't know how to tell you.
I mean, I knew Heath was coming tonight, but it Last night wasn't supposed to happen.
No kidding.
I know this is awkward and I'm really sorry.
I justwell, when you sort of invited yourself along, I I am so terrible at this.
Which bit? Making out with McNursey over there or the letting me down gently? We shook on it, remember? You're right.
Fflends? No hard feelings.
Er, good luck with Heath.
He seems like a really great guy.
I must just go mingle with the locals.
This is great for Melissa.
She's a great girl and she deserves a great guy.
It's all great.
And it's gonna be even greater after I've finished my hundredth beer.
Babe.
Babe, come on.
Come on.
You've been flaunting that spectacular hiney off with me all night long.
Come on, what are you? You a tease or something? I'm not interested.
Give me one good reason why not? I have a boyfriend.
Do you really? I can't see him anywhere.
Right.
Well.
Should really keep an eye on your girlfriend, mate.
'Cause she's trouble.
Wow.
Sorry.
You have no idea how persistent that guy was.
Did he even use a pick-up line or just hope that if he breathed enough alcohol then you'd give in'? Can I buy you a drink? It's the least I can do after you saved me.
Considering the pash I just received, I think I should buy you a beer.
Or a slab.
Or a brewery.
I'm Lauren.
Ben.
How about we buy each other a drink, being long-term romantic partners and all.
Whatever you say.
So do you often grab strangers in clubs? Only the cute ones who come to my rescue.
Actually, you helped me out a little tonight yourself.
So you're on somebody's radar? An ex, maybe? Or a maybe, maybe? Uh, the second one.
Her'? Seriously? You could do so much better.
Really? Who's this? Are you trying something with my girlfriend, mate? Girlfriend? No, no, no.
This is Ben.
He helped me out when you weren't here.
I'm half an hour late and you're off with some other guy'? Actually, I might get going.
Oh, you're not going anywhere.
Marco! (SMASH!) You're pathetic! I'm pathetic? You're a dirty whore.
MEL: My God.
Ben, are you alright? Are you OK'? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm fine.
I might get going.
Have a great night.
LAUREN: You don't think I know what you're doing behind my back? WOMAN: (ON TV) .
.
spend the rest of our lives together and you took off.
MAN: Sole remaining brumby that comes into the village The fire here better Thought! was going If you're gonna keep flicking, why don't we just watch a DVD? Seen 'em.
What? Everything on the shelf? Pretty much.
(CH UCKLES) Why don't you go up to the shop then? Can't be bothered.
The get-up-and-go generation! So much vim.
Alright, if I go to the video shop, will you guys watch whatever I pick, no complaints? Bring back a block of chocolate and you got yourself a deal.
Go to the action section first.
I'm thinking early Van Damme.
Oror a romantic comedy.
(swans) (CHUCKLES) Actually, I might get going too.
I'll walk you to the video store.
OK.
You don't wanna stay for a DVD? Uh, no.
Best be off, love.
Thanks for a lovely night.
I really enjoyed the company.
'Bye, Grandad.
See you, Ted.
(LAUGHS) Look, let's talk about the music because it's great to see you back on the road, Steve.
Ugh.
Next.
No, Rachel, just leave it.
Glad you asked Boring! S H H ! We kick off in a few weeks.
Now, we might be getting long in the tooth Mmm, Dad, come on.
Rach.
Rachel, please, please.
We are gonna rock hard.
Eugh, it's like one of those, “lf you're over 5O and no longer working full-time" ads.
Shh, shh, shh, shh.
Do not miss it.
It's the 'Greaties from the '80s' tour.
It is going to be amazing.
Right now, Steve Vlfilson and The Front.
(SINGS) Wake up this morning There's no-one beside me Saturday morning, my mother, she'll chide me I'm just No, that's alright.
You can turn it over now.
(CHATTER AN D LAUGHTER) Oh, that's not fair.
Not fair! No! Oooh.
Oh, my God.
OK.
You're dead.
No, no, no.
Ah, yes! Yes! (LAUGHS) I'm catching up.
I'm catching up.
Hey.
Hey Benno, you're back early.
Yep.
Where's Mel? I don't know.
Getting lucky, I guess.
Um, well, I should probably call it a night.
You're kidding? I was just starting to catch up.
Sorry.
No, I shouldl should go.
Hey, thanks for a great day.
Oh, the best day.
See you soon, right? Yeah.
See you, Ben.
See ya.
Alright, spill.
What the hell was going on there? I know.
I can't believe she was kicking my butt either.
No, I mean, like, why was she even here? Mate, she's a legend.
She knows more about Chargers than I do.
You can't be mates with Chrissy.
Why not? It's.
.
.
it's just weird.
It's like she's cradle-snatching.
We're not dating, mate.
It looked like a date to me.
Look, she liked my car.
We went for a ride.
We hit it off! That's it! Chrissy's a really great person.
Get off her back! (QUIETLY) Alright.
Don't bite my head off.
Ah, here he is! Rip Van Winkle.
Didn't drop off till 3:00am.
Nothing wrong with a sleep-in on the weekend.
Would you like some tea to go with that'? No, thanks.
Hmm.
When did you start playing again? Oh, I found it in here a while back.
I thought I'd give it a try.
Been a long time.
Yeah, I'll probably sell it.
Get some cash for it.
Oh, or you could keep it, start playing again.
Yeah, maybe.
No harm seeing whether that amp's still working either.
How's your back? You hit those chairs pretty hard.
No, I didn't.
It's all good.
Where's, uh, Heath? I made him a coffee.
He, um, didn't come home with me last night.
Oh, really.
That's a pity.
(DOORBELL CHIMES) So what happened with that girl last night? You could have picked one who wasn't dating Rambo Junior.
It's none of your business, the way I see it.
Benno! Visitor.
Lauren.
Cute in the morning too.
Are you missing something? Thanks.
Didn't even know it was missing.
Did I drop it'? It probably fell out of your pocket in the brawl.
How is your boyfriend? Oh, sorry, this is my housemate, Melissa.
I'm sorry about that.
He's a tool and I should have broken it off ages ago.
But I owe you one, Ben.
At least another round of drinks.
Might have to hold you to that.
Thanks for the courier service.
It wasit was really nice of you.
'Nice'? Is that all? Can I just check? Um, Rambo, is he still in the picture? He's definitely an ex.
Thank God for that.
I like my arms attached to my body.
(LAUGHS) I have to go to work.
I have a cafe.
Really? Cool.
But, later, are your free'? Yeah, definitely.
Well, I'm having some drinks with friends at the Boat Club on the marina.
I work at the Boat Club.
Free drinks! We'll be there around 9:00.
Sounds perfect.
Great.
See ya.
Try not to get into any more brawls in the meantime.
(G R U NTS) Ooh, shot! What do you reckon? She is smoking.
Please tell me you're gonna date her.
Tonight at the Boat Club.
You only just met her last night.
You sure she's into you? She is.
She just kissed me.
What? In the driveway? On the lips, actually.
You're funny.
Mate, you're a God.
This is great.
Good for you, Ben.
She seems like a really lovely person.
You know, I reckon the same about Heath.
Thanks.
Great idea to go out last night.
We both picked winners.
Definitely.
See? Easy.
That's how the best kind of friendships work.
A little bit of support, a bit of give and take, everyone back on board the mates train.
Dad? Dad! DAD! Dad, hi! Oh, hi.
Sorry.
Are you channelling the ghosts of rock stars past'? I'm writing a song.
You don't write songs.
Yes, I do.
Since when? I'll play it to you.
No laughing.
Oh, wouldn't dream of it.
Unless you're gonna do the Jagger strut too.
Then I might have to disown you.
(CLEARS THROAT) Uh, well, let the stones roll.
I'm ready.
OK.
(SINGS) Was a long time coming Only yesterday Can you feel it coming our way? That guitar's been in the garage for years but I've never seen him pick it up.
Remember how he used to growl at us when we asked about it? Now, all of a sudden, I'm getting an intimate rock concert for two.
You should have seen it.
I didn't know he had the energy.
Hmm.
Is this something I wanna hear? Oh, probably.
It's about your husband.
Really? Dad was rockin' the suburbs.
Writing a song, if you can believe it.
Dave was writing a new song? Yeah, he needs to practise for about three years but, uh, the old man didn't do too badly.
Are you sure you wanna do this? Baby, did I stay right by your side all night? Yeah, but Did I explicitly say I wanted to go back to your place? Yeah.
Then shut up and take me to your bedroom.
OK.
If there's some kind of memo we could circulate about the kids not buying me murder-mysteries for every celebration, I'd appreciate it.
Everything OK with you? It'd be better if I didn't have to read all about Inspector Prig and the marsh murderers.
I'm serious.
Talk to me.
Yeah, I'm fine.
Never better.
(SIGHS) Been writing songs again.
Word travels fast in this place.
Well, it's just, you know, you haven't touched that guitar in years, so why now'? Bloke's gotta have a hobby.
I'd love to hear it.
Well, it's not finished and it probably never will be so just don't worry about it.
Come on.
You're talking to Yoko here.
I love all your songs.
Come on, what's going on? I've been trying to get you to pick up that guitar for decades.
Well, maybe I've started listening.
Goodnight, Jules.
Goodnight.
Morning.
Hi, Lauren.
Coffee? Actually, I'd better get to the gym.
I'm late for pump class.
No worries.
Lunch today'? You're on, baby.
Mmm! Hmm.
What? You're unbelievable.
Oh, is this one of those girl things where I'm supposed to guess what I've done wrong'? We slept together two days ago.
And'? And you don't think it might be slightly insensitive to parade her around the house, not to mention shagging her in the bedroom right across from me? You were the one who said it was a mistake.
That you wanted to be friends.
I do.
You were the one saying how happy you were for me.
I am.
it's just we don't have to be happy for each other so publicly.
And what about Heath? Heath didn't stay over.
Since when do you get to make up the rules? Have a listen to yourself.
CARBO: Ah, where's Lauren? Ah! The gym.
Keeping herself fit for round two.
Ding, ding, Benno! You two are pathetic.
What's up with her? I dunno.
PMSing, maybe.
(CH UCKLES) What? Dynamite.
Definitely a nine.
Oh, not a 10'? They don't exist in the real world.
How's Melissa feeling about your new lady friend? You snooze, you lose.
I can't believe you sometimes.
Why? What do you want me to say? She's dealing with it.
We're friends.
Oh, just like that'? Yeah.
She's met a guy too.
Everything3 worked out perfectly.
You have to meet her, Rach.
Seriously, she's so hot.
Who's hot? Oh, Ben's got a new bit of fluff.
Apparently she's a goddess.
Right.
Goddess like the girl you dated who had to wear a neck brace? She hurt her neck in a skiing accident, you jerk.
I'm gonna be honest with you.
Most of the girls you've dated - and I use the term loosely - have been complete inbreds.
If this chick manages to walk and talk at the same time that will be a huge step up.
You alright? Do I look alright? Just checking.
You know, what's going on with you and Ben? What do you mean? Come on.
I'm not stupid.
It was totally intense in there before.
Thought you two were gonna start stabbing each other with spatulas.
You can't stab someone with a spatula.
Actually, you can.
Come on.
What's the issue? You can tell Uncle Carbo.
Please don't refer to yourself as 'Uncle Carbo' again.
What? You don't like Miss Hottie McLegs? Mmm.
She's, um, vapid, skanky and calls men 'baby'.
She's my favourite person.
Now, if this wasn't Ben we're talking about, I'd say you're acting like a jealous ex or something.
Ben can do what he wants.
I just don't want the house being taken over by latest shags - yours, mine or his.
Is that why you didn't bring Heath home the other night? Exactly.
It's called respect for your housemates, otherwise it can get messy.
Hmm.
I never thought of it like that before.
Glad I can open your mind to new experiences.
Mmm.
Er, halogen, they just take about an hour.
Yeah, alright.
Alright, well, great.
I'll see you at 4:00.
OK.
See you.
Second job offer today.
Those posters must be working.
Oh, well, don't take any more, OK'? It's the weekend.
Freelancing means never saying no.
Oh (SCOFFS) Hi, Mum! Who's that'? About to find out.
Mum, Dad, uh, this is Lauren.
Hi.
Can see why your son's so cute.
(LAUGHS) Oh, thanks.
But he actually gets his good looks from his mum.
Aw! Well, anyway, we're just on our way to lunch.
Thought I'd pop by and say hello.
Um, Nathan's out the back.
Oh, is he home? Yeah, you might, um, wanna go round and introduce Lauren.
Oh, well, I don't want to be rude.
Come on, Lauren.
It was nice meeting you both.
You too.
Not his usual type.
I mean, not the type that usually likes him back.
Not the type I want him to end up with, either.
I give it five minutes.
Hmm.
(LAUGHS) Ben tells me you work at Hampton Lewis.
You're so young.
You must be really driven to succeed.
I just know what I want and how to get it.
Pays to be one step ahead.
I bet you could teach me a lot.
So how did you guys meet again? He saved me from a slobbering moron.
Cute and charming.
how could I resist? Pretty easily, I think.
Yeah, good on ya.
I'm just saying, a beautiful woman running her own business.
What are you offering? Not all girls go for smug wannabes like you.
Boys, please, there's plenty of me to go around.
So when's your lunch'? Ooh, half an hour.
It's a pretty fancy restaurant.
Better get going.
Hmm.
Is McDonalds taking reservations now'? (LAUGHS) Was really nice to meet you, Lauren.
You too.
Maybe we could make a night of it.
Double-date? Yeah, that would be that would be fun.
'Bye.
'Bye.
How did Ben finally score a smart, hot chick like that'? (SIGHS) What? Ah! There you are.
What happened? Was Nathan jealous? How was lunch'? Nathan was spewing.
His brain nearly exploded when he saw her.
Bet you his brain wasn't the only thing.
I had to pay for lunch, but it was worth it.
Best day of my life.
There was talk of double-dating.
Oh'? Like that's ever gonna happen with Nathan.
But maybe we should give it a go.
What? Just the three of us'? Mate, I'm not into that kinky stuff.
Mate, you can ask someone too, idiot! Oh! Who? Well, I don't know.
What about Greta? Greta? Oh, with the Yeah, her or Annie.
She's fun.
Lauren would love her.
Annie.
Good idea.
(CLEARS THROAT) Yeah.
Is that Greta? Hi.
It's Carbo.
How you doing? What's that'? It's fish.
How can you go wrong with fish? Women love fish.
Yeah, not fish fingers, you moron.
We can dress them up so they don't look like fish fingers.
How'? Carve them into fish shapes'? I can't hear you come up with any better ideas.
What's wrong with pasta'? Boring.
Ah! Melissa, you're a woman.
Oh, I love conversations that start with that observation.
We're looking for something to impress Lauren.
Tell her to go date someone else? Funny.
Have a heart, Mel.
Sorry, boys.
Have fun with your dates.
Carb, this is serious.
We need to figure out what to cook before the girls get here.
Would you get those things out of my face? Whack on a bit of tartare, lemon.
We need help.
Start with cheeses, but nothing too stinky.
And no blue.
It's not good date material, trust me.
Cheddar? Er, well, yeah.
It'll have to do.
But at least take it out of the packet.
And we need some water crackers, nice ones.
Check! So, who's your date for tonight's extravaganza? I'm still waiting on a few call-backs.
Ah, true optimism never dies.
So, why isn't Melissa helping you out with this? You've never eaten anything Mel's cooked, have you? She's bailed, anyway.
Ah, that's because she doesn't want you parading Lauren around in front of her.
I don't parade! Oh, please.
You practically threw confetti all over her when you introduced her to Nathan.
He told me.
Melissa's a big girl.
She doesn't care.
Of course, she does, you twit.
She's still keen on you and she can't handle seeing you with other women.
Maybe in the world according to Rachel.
Well, wait and see.
When things fall apart with Lauren, Melissa's going to offer up her shoulder to cry on.
She'll be there for you in your time of need.
It's classic behaviour.
When things fall apart'? That's not gonna happen.
Why didn't you teach Ben to put together a half-decent roast? On.
(LAUGHS) If Lauren makes it through to dessert, I will be surprised.
Hey, listen.
have you noticed your dad acting a bit, um, odd lately? Odd? Try QFUmPV- He's been in a bad mood ever since that stupid show.
What stupid show'? 'Interviews with Ancient Rock Stars', Steve Something and the Geriatrics.
Steve Wilson and the Front? Yeah, that's them.
Oh.
Your vintage.
Makes sense.
Why does that make sense'? Er (SIGHS) Mum, come on.
What's the big secret? Not my story to tell.
(DOORBELL RINGS) Chrissy.
Hey.
Hi, Ben.
I just wanted to drop this round for Carbo.
ls hem'? Perfect timing! Are you hungry'? Carbo! Er, we're having people over for dinner, remember? Exactly.
That's why it's so perfect.
Please, come in.
Have dinner with us.
I don't wanna intrude.
No, you're not.
Trust me.
We've got heaps.
Are you sure? Yeah, absolutely.
Don't let me down here.
Take a seat.
Carbo, are you sure this is a good idea? Yeah, it's genius.
I guessed someone would show up eventually.
What happened to Greta.
Er, engaged.
Andand Annie? You don't wanna know about Annie, trust me.
It's just it's it's a bit weird, that's all.
Look, you asked me to find someone.
I just did.
Relax.
It's gonna be great.
I thought we were double-dating with your brother.
What's with the old lady? Oh, that's Chrissy.
She's Carbo's friend.
Right.
Well, I guess everyone's got their fetishes.
Ah, Lauren! Come sit down.
Hi.
I'm Chrissy.
Lauren.
Fancy some cheese'? No, thanks.
I don't do dairy.
Lauren.
Cheers.
You have the most amazing tan.
Oh.
(CH UCKLES) Well, thanks.
It's not natural, right? I mean, no-one goes that colour.
(LAUGHS) Yeah.
No, it is, I'm afraid, yeah.
Bit old-school, I know.
(GIGGLES) Wow.
Amazing.
North Cronulla Beach.
I can highly recommend it.
I prefer the spray-on version.
I don't wanna hit 3O with wrecked skin.
Should have told me this was about Steve Wilson.
So, all these changes lately You're not regretting anything, are you? No, never.
It's just unfinished business.
The band and all that was was a long time ago.
It's justjust water under the bridge, really.
Yeah, but you must miss it.
I mean, the gigs, the applause, the groupies.
Er, you were my only-ever groupie.
Yeah.
Listen, Dave, if all this stuffs bubbling up, I mean, maybe it's time to tell the kids the whole story.
Get it out in the open.
I dunno, Jules.
Well, Rachel's gonna ferret out the truth somehow, anyway.
And, personally, I think they should know the choices that you made for them, what you gave up.
But it's up to you.
Thanks for coming over and stuff.
That's OK.
Sorry I couldn't eat the pasta bake.
I just don't do carbs after 6:00.
Right.
Is your friend seriously gonna date that woman? Hey.
Chrissy's a great person.
She knows more about Chargers than Carbo does.
Gee, great.
Well, let's face it.
All Italians are mama's boys.
Carbo's Greek.
Same thing.
I mean, how desperate does he need to be'? Can't he meet girls his own age? I'm tired.
I'm gonna go to bed.
No problem.
I've got an early start in the morning.
I'll call you.
Sure.
Speak soon.
Talk about dodging a bullet.
So, Carbo, how much will the Torana set you back? About 900 bucks.
Got a good deal.
Bit of work, it'll probably sell on for a couple of grand, easy.
(LAUGHS) Hey, um, you should come with me and pick it up, give me a hand fixing it.
Yeah.
That sounds like fun.
Where did Ben get to? I dunno.
He's been gone ages.
(LAUGHS) Lauren's probably got her claws into him somewhere.
Yeah.
She's a bit full-on, isn't she? (CHUCKLES) Mm-hm.
You know all that stuff she was saying to you? It was crap.
You know that.
Don't worry.
I can handle bitchy comments.
I've had plenty of practice.
(CHUCKLES) So It was a good night.
Yeah.
Unreal.
I'd better go.
Right.
Thanks for being nice about the food.
Oh, that's OK.
It wasit was good.
I wanted fish fingers.
Ben talked me out of it.
I'm a maniac for fish fingers.
No way! Yeah.
Cheese on top, under the griller.
Magic! I may even go do that right now.
(LAUGHS) Well, thanks.
Never figured you for an Alfa driver.
It's a very good car, excuse me.
I just figuredyou know, you talk about sexy beasts.
Oh, yeah.
The Mustang's in the shop.
Hey, I'll take you for a joy-ride when it's out, if you like.
Oh, that'd be awesome.
OK.
Um, thanks again.
Yeah.
You too.
Hey! Stop! I just wanted to let you know that I had a really, really good time with you.
OK.
Talk to you tomorrow.
OK.
You're not googling Steve Wilson, are you? Well, sometimes a girl just has to take matters into her own hands.
Well, you won't find anything there.
Oh? Well, I guess it's up to you, then.
Alright.
In a nutshell, I started the band with Steve, co-wrote that song that you heard them playing, 'Suburban Boy', and then I met your mother, left the band and never got a credit for the song.
And here we are.
Er, er And in a slightly larger nutshell, why did you leave'? Julie got pregnant with you.
That's it? (LAUGHS) So what? Oh, please tell me she wasn't some sort of Stevie Nicks tambourine-hitter in the band and pregnancy interfered with her playing.
Wrong era.
And no, she wasn't.
Well, then, why quit? Couldn't you have just kept on playing and taken us all on tour with you? I could have been the Apple to your Chris and Gwyneth.
(LAUGHS) I'm serious, Dad.
Why give up fame, fortune, something that you love'? Look, the band was great but it was no way to support a family.
Your mum and I wanted a home, family, food on the table, stable job, roof over our heads.
I got no regrets, Rachel.
Then why are you sitting out there in the dark with your guitar? Didn't expect to find you still up.
How was dinner? Er, it was interesting.
And terrible.
Chrissy turned up.
She was kind of Carbo's date.
Wow.
Good for him.
Lauren's a fat cow.
Well, maybe she's not fat, but she'sshe's definitely a cow.
How was your night with Nurse Heath? Remarkably similar to yours.
He's a sexist pig.
Well, maybe not a pig, but he's definitely sexist.
How can a male nurse be sexist? I paid for dinner.
He said I was 'disempowering' him.
Seriously? I wouldn't have cared.
(GIGGLES) (SIGHS) We sure can pick 'em.
Mmm.
You wanna watch a DVD? Sounds like a plan.
My pick.
Maybe it'll work.
Maybe it's better to have Melissa in my life as a mate than not have her at all.
Hey, I've been thinking and I want you to know that our friendship's really important to me, so whenever you find another girl, hopefully not like Lauren, and you wanna talk, my door's always open.
Or Rachel was right after all and I've still got a chance.
I did some ringing around for you.
Steve Wilson's number.
You're pushy, aren't you? I want to hear your songs.
All of them.
Ooh! For the ballads.
(LAUGHS) Something I wrote? Yep.
OK.
(PLAYS 'SMOKE ON THE WATER') Dad! (CLEARS TH ROAT) OK.
SINGS: Bright skies are shining over you J"You tell me what I BEN: Maybe Dad was ready to face the music literally, stop denying the truth.
I knew how he was feeling.
Great night! Great night, Benno.
Other than the devil insulting your date, you mean.
Yeah, speaking of which, are you seeing Lauren tonight? Might rest that one on the bench for a bit.
Or forever.
Good call.
I reckon she'd turn out to be a massive spanner.
WOMAN: Hey! Can you kick it back? Ooh, I got it.
Sometimes I swear he's five years old.
What are you doing? I'm kissing you.
What does this mean? No one-night stands, no 'friends with benefits'.
I'm talking full-on relationship or nothing.
If we do this, we're taking it slow.
No rushing into bed again.
Deal? Deal.
Is, er, kissing allowed? Kissing is definitely allowed.