Samantha! (2018) s01e04 Episode Script

Episode 4

A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES Ungrateful bastards! Whatever.
There will be lots of people at this party.
If I want to get a job, I can't hide here, right? - Marcinho said I have to go out.
- Get out! He said if I'm not playing then why not get a job off the pitch? - A broadcaster or commentator - I'm using the bathroom! He told us to arrive as a couple, because couples sell.
Are you going like that? It's almost ten! If I'm using the bathroom, you can't come in! Do you understand? Couples use the bathroom together.
- Nobody's shit smells nice.
- I didn't make myself clear.
- I'm not going to this party! - Samantha, you promised me! - I can't handle this TV stuff.
- You can handle a party.
- Damn, are we together or not? - We are, my dear, but we're not.
Speaking of that, you can sleep with the first bimbo you see, OK? Then you'll stop being needy and leave me alone.
Relax, I'll dress nicely for the bimbos, OK? See if you can get one with a spare room, Dodoi! Just one, Samantha? You don't know me! Dodoi, I'm not going to any damn party, especially after this circus here! They didn't even take a good picture of me getting kicked off that lousy show.
I can't go to the party anyway, did you forget? I'm in Paris! - Where? - I went to Paris and I'll be back next week! "I'm in Paris.
" Never heard that one before.
- Hey, Dodoi! Notice me! Come here! - You're so hot! Bonjour, Plimploms.
I just woke up, guys.
I'm here having my cup of coffee, eating my typical Parisian croissant.
Delicious! Mine is ham and cheese.
I have to tell you it's like I was born to be here, in this amazing city, guys.
I don't have time for the evil gossip of jealous haters.
Everywhere I look, I see beautiful things! By the way I want to thank Frizzon Optics for these gorgeous sunglasses.
I have to go, my loves.
It's very chilly here! Cindy, what are you laughing at? How does it look, son? This time it didn't burn.
No, love.
I mean the video.
I have to use this trip to Paris to grow my Instagram.
And reach, maybe, at least 200k.
So I don't depend as much on TV.
What are you laughing at? Look, Cindy! You should have come to Paris with me.
You were kicked off the show too.
Mom, I'm laughing at Laila.
She's so funny.
Did you know she went to Paris twice this month? - Twice? - I'd go to Paris with her.
As if she'd go with you.
That's your problem, Cindy.
I know lots of people in that city, my real friends.
Like Gretchen, like Neymar! I'm childhood friends with Jordi.
She's so humble.
She just said she farts when she eats bread.
She announces when she farts? You and Laila have nothing in common, Mom.
She's different.
What do you mean "different", Brandon? Come here, Cindy.
Let me see this girl's face! So much talk about this girl! Four million followers? Namibia.
Australia? Germany? What is this girl? A flight attendant? I recognize that bathtub! Baby, will you bring me a towel? Fucking hell! Morning! How is Paris? Just great! It's very nice, actually.
I feel really at home.
- Do you need the bathroom? - I've got a headache.
A shower might help.
I know how it is.
You look good for someone who was afraid to party.
It was a business occasion.
I was there to network.
Network, sure.
Well, I'm going to pee real quick.
I don't want an emergency in the line for the Eiffel Tower.
Can't you use the guest bathroom? I'm cold, baby! My body fat is like half a percent.
Did you teach the tub to talk, Dodoi? Or is this part of your networking? It's a funny story, you won't believe it! I'm sure I won't believe it! You scared me! Samantha! This is embarrassing, sorry! Laila.
It's my pleasure.
Where are the kids? I'd love to meet them! - Who's that in my bathtub? - Well, she's the first bimbo I saw.
And the line was long.
You probably forgot, right, Samantha? When you're famous, people gather around, wanting attention.
What's this to do with you? Mom! Laila just posted a photo shaving with your razor! Adults are talking, Cindy! Excuse us, excuse me! And no more banging doors, OK? I think help has arrived, guys! Do you guys see this? Look at this cutie! I feel like Angelina.
Is she here to answer my hashtag "a towel for Laila"? Caught you in your pajamas? No.
Crazy girl! I think I got my towel, babies! What else will I find in this house? I wanted to thank the members of the Academy, my dear Samantha, my father, and my sister, who unfortunately couldn't be here as I only had two invitations.
Kids are cute even when they're sad.
This is Laila, my personal friend.
I'm going to lend her some clothes.
I don't repeat outfits.
And your dad vomited on my dress.
Are you dad's girlfriend? - We're getting to know each other.
- I love it when you say that! Do you want a little brother? I'm joking, silly! Actually, by law, I can't get pregnant.
I'm injecting shark hormones for my hair.
What's your Instagram? @BrandonRealOfficial.
Will you follow me? Obviously not! I tagged you in the Oscars video! You two are so cute! I already feel attached to you.
Imagine a picture of us? Hashtag "heart family"! Only pictures of me.
Take whatever you want.
Feel free! Do you have any clean ones? - Where is she? - You scared her off with your jealousy.
Jealousy, Dodoi? You don't even know her name! - It's Sheila! - Hello! - Here's Sheila! - It's Laila.
- Look, Laila.
- Sorry, I came straight from the party.
But Cindy was cute and lent me this shirt.
Hashtag "gratitude".
Dodoi, your girlfriend fits in your daughter's clothes.
I know.
And she looks hot, right? Samantha, I love that this is a museum of your life.
It's just what fits on the walls.
It seems like you died at your peak, super chic.
My mom was a huge fan when you were famous! If I don't get a photo, she'll kill me! - Let me take the picture! - Yeah? - It's for her mom, Samantha.
- It's for my mom.
- No photos! - No, I'll put a filter on you, honey.
No! She's in Montmartre! Is it contagious? I used your bathtub! I used your razor.
And your toothbrush! I love your family.
Colorful, cheerful, full of minorities.
It would make a beautiful post! If you want to help with those party contacts, I know everyone, OK? - Call me, OK? - No, Laila, stay.
What? Stay a little.
Samantha would love some tips on Paris, you know? You're going to Paris? Winter is fattening! - What a good tip, Samantha! - No, guys, I can't stay! - Imagine! It's crazy! I'm not family.
- Of course you are.
You're not a burden! - The kids would love it! - She's always welcome, right? Make yourself at home, Laila.
No problem, make yourself comfortable.
By the way, I'm going out for a while, but I'll be right back.
I know what you're thinking, that I killed animals to make this coat.
No, I'm thinking it's a little hot.
They were already dead.
Just kidding, silly! Brandon, get the bike, we're going to Versailles.
There's a bakery near here.
Mom, you can't leave.
There are paparazzi out there.
No, you're in Paris! But if I'm in Paris, why are there paparazzi outside? They didn't come because of you.
I won't let this girl ruin my trip.
All right, Brandon.
Let's choose another place to make the video.
Brandon? Brandon! When I saw you at the party, I thought you were just another soccer player on my Instagram stories.
But now I look at you and I see a real father.
You have matured so much since yesterday.
I'm still learning this dad business.
Samantha does almost everything.
I think your relationship is so civilized.
Once I bumped into my ex-boyfriend in the street, he threw poop in my hair.
Then he screamed, "You murderer! You killed my cat!" But did you kill his cat? I helped the cat to move on.
Focus, Samantha.
Focus! Project Paris.
Leave Dodoi and that girl in Brazil.
How's my Instagram? - Another 70 followers.
- Only 70, honey? So I'm not sightseeing enough.
If that girl got four million followers just by travelling, a woman like me can have 300,000 by the end of the day.
You think when we're a bit more intimate I can give Samantha a gift? I don't know.
It's better not to mix things up.
I'd like to change that armchair, but I don't want to be rude.
Did you see that coat? "The animals were already dead.
" "Winter is fattening.
" How rude.
What about the Louvre? Mom, for three hours you've only been posting paintings.
Only Dodoi can make me this mad while I'm on vacation in Paris.
Mom, forget it, what if you went to a spa? Honey, no.
I need something more important, I don't know, an event.
It was a multicolored disc Hey, look.
Go, go, faster! Go, go! Thanks, darlings.
Can I take it? One, two, three, I'm answering.
Hi, my love! Honey, I can't believe you're in Paris and you didn't tell me! Where are you staying? In a hotel here called Bon Bon Vivant.
Are you avoiding me? Now everyone is talking about you because of "Caged".
You don't have time for your friend? No way, love.
I was going to I'll pick you up right now! There's a huge party, with chic people.
Open bar, champagne, the whole of Monaco, and free croissants.
I would really love to go, but I'm busy.
Please! Send me your location.
I'll pick you up right now.
I already said I can't and it's true.
I get it! You ashamed of your three-star hotel? Don't worry, I've been there too.
I knew this would be a lot of work.
I'm at work.
I'm in a super new project, but I can't talk about it yet.
If I get a break, I promise I'll tell you, OK? - What are you doing? Come on, tell me! - Speak to you later, love.
- Samantha, let's talk more! - We'll talk later, bye! I knew she wouldn't keep it a secret.
Think she noticed? I think I'm going to have to shorten my trip.
- There's a photographer out there again.
- I know, I called him.
Another picture? This is for hashtag "love sees no color", against racism.
I'm keeping your identity a secret.
But you're already a big hit! 20,000 people already liked your rock hard booty.
Did you take a picture of my ass? You know what I think would explode? A family photo! Can I take your kids to Disneyworld or is it too early? I want to do everything at the right time.
Laila, we need to talk.
You can say whatever you want to me.
I know we're thinking the same thing.
I accept.
Airports are closed.
Streets are blocked.
The electricity has gone out.
This is a summary of the biggest blizzard in the last 30 years in Paris.
Hashtag "I knew it".
People are completely terrified.
OK, we're stuck in Paris.
This is not a problem! We can find some snow.
How's Instagram looking? I've got a bunch of new followers.
They found out I'm friends with Laila.
I'm talking about my Instagram, Brandon! Focus here, please.
Guys! I've got 5,000 followers.
Everyone is tagging me in this post, why? They're going to shoot a soap opera here in Paris.
People think that's why you came.
Leave me alone, Dodoi.
I didn't overcome candidiasis to be treated this way.
I knew this was an abusive relationship when you didn't remember my name! Sweethearts, you won't believe what happened.
My mom got hit by a car.
No, I'm joking, but it was just as horrible.
I was deceived by someone I thought was the love of my life.
One moment we're planning to spend New Year's in Trancoso, the next moment he throws me away like I'm an old 30-year-old woman.
He's not even my type.
I like players who still score goals! I could have been a mom to his children.
This is the subject of this week's video.
Hashtag "How could he fool me".
The best story wins two sessions of cryolipolysis.
Girls, let's empower ourselves.
Hashtag "girl power".
Tell me what you know about the soap opera.
You used to be more humble.
Now you disrespect those who've helped you.
I'm sorry! I was in the middle of a meeting.
But now we can gossip as much as we want.
All right.
We can't fight, especially if you're on TV, right? Are you preparing for the role? Sure! Of course! I want to add a more modern, current style.
For the French Revolution? Precisely.
Ancient France.
The subject always needs a revamp, don't you think? But tell me, what else do you know? I'll tell you everything! Dodoi! Don't you have a friend who was beheaded in prison? I'm looking for references for a job.
Samantha, you were right.
What? Say that again.
- That girl over there.
That - Laila.
Yes, go on.
We need to make her leave.
- "We", Dodoi? - "We" do! If you'd come with me, I wouldn't have met her.
I'm working, my dear.
OK? I'm looking for some references in the kids' history books.
Because you can't trust the internet these days, right? According to rumors, I am part of the first Brazilian soap opera on the French Revolution.
You know who you're talking to? Who am I talking to? The apparent star of Passion and Revolution 2: The Fall of the Bastille.
- A soap opera? - They're only rumors, Dodoi.
That I'm going to turn into reality.
- People - Look.
That's what I'm talking about.
let's not give in to men who don't respect us.
Laila, look at your power.
Be happy, sis! Babes, you know I always support an anti-toxic-man campaign.
Stay strong, and girl power! I'm leaving.
That's fine, then.
We'll talk, darling.
Samantha, thank you so much for everything.
Want some advice, girl? You should leave too.
You can go.
You can go ahead, OK? I should expose the truth about this family! - Stay, girl! - Weren't you busy? Super busy.
Spreading news.
But I think I have a lot to learn from Laila.
- Thanks! - Come here.
I can't believe you know her! We've even gone to war on Twitter once.
- We did a commercial.
- For that intimate soap, Fungicide? No.
I was invited to do that one too.
- What a small world, right? - Yeah.
Samantha, I'm so happy with our friendship! I have the hardest time making relationships last long.
I totally get you, Laila.
It's hard for successful women like us, right? - Everyone likes to talk.
- Everyone wants to take advantage.
This is the most comfortable armchair in the entire universe! - You think they're OK in there? - Define "OK".
So it's true? I always thought that story about knives inside the doll was a rumor.
With the internet, there's no more fuss about true or false.
Occasionally people make stuff up that I wish were true.
They said I took part in an animal orgy.
I wasn't even invited.
In the end, I signed a deal with a pet food brand.
Girlfriend, tell me, how did you really get famous? Did you take part in that singing competition? I can't sing.
- Are you an actress? - I hate theater.
So boring! But you have four million followers on Instagram, don't you? Five million followers.
I'm a "digital influencer".
- A what? - A spiritual guide.
Without the spiritual.
Hold on, you're saying you don't sing, don't dance, you're not an actress, so you do absolutely nothing? For example, if I say that food poisoning makes you thinner, in five seconds everyone will drink toilet water, something I personally don't do anymore.
The world's gone really crazy.
But I try to use it only to do good.
Like nature.
If I say that the cool thing now is to dye your hair green to defend the Amazon rainforest, tomorrow everyone will have green hair.
What are they talking about? I thought they hated each other! Dad, as much as it hurts to say this, as a feminist and cosmopolitan, I think there's no denying it, they're bad-mouthing you.
Nothing unites people like a common enemy.
Think they will make a doll of me? They won't make a Laila doll? They only made dolls of truly famous people.
You don't think I'm truly famous? You are.
Of course you are.
But this internet business is very fast, you know, Laila? When they make a Laila doll, there'll be a new girl already.
Back then, to be famous, you had to have done something impressive, like a movie, a show, a soap opera.
So you think Samantha is more famous than Laila? #SAVETHEGREENAMAZON - Count to five.
- Seriously? - I'm saving the fucking Amazon! Do it.
- No.
Let me see! She just posted something.
Ten thousand people already liked my picture.
Am I or am I not fucking famous? It was a multicolored disc A flying saucer So bright A beautiful sight Today, I'm going to read a letter from Rodrigo Menezes, from São Raimundo Nonato.
Look how cute He gave me his tooth! It costs nothing for these people to like your picture, Laila.
What you need to understand is that a fan of mine at that time is worth 100,000 of your fans today, got it? I'm not trying to offend you.
I swear.
I like you.
But it's different being on television.
I also like you, Samantha! When Dodoi told me that you were in "Paris" to overcome a trauma, my heart ached, you know? What are you saying? I kept thinking if I should do a campaign, like a crowdfunding, to really send her to Paris.
- Is that a threat? - No! Now that I know you so well, I know you're so "real-life".
You are real, Samantha.
They're not laughing anymore! That's a bad sign.
I know! - What happened to you? - It's for the Amazon rainforest, Dad.
Nice! This will distract your mom! Can you go in there? Dad, people are cursing you on Twitter.
- I don't have Twitter.
- You do.
Look at this death threat.
"After I kill you, I'll wear your skin.
" A nine-year-old girl said that? You shouldn't have mistreated Laila.
Samantha Enterprise, good morning! Actually, I think that having your own doll is kind of tacky.
It's not about tackiness, it's about talent, you know? For both your own sake, I hope that comes out! You see? Everything for the Amazon.
Your kids are on my side! - Mom, it's a call for you, it's from - Honey, I'm in Paris, I made that clear! - It's from TV, Mom.
- TV? What do you mean? Give me that phone! Hello? Hi, I'm so sorry for the delay, I'm out of the country, you know.
What rumor? I haven't heard any rumors.
It's funny, I was walking around Versailles today! Silvio wants to talk to me? OK! Tell him to call me.
I'll look at my schedule.
I think I can do it.
I'm absolutely sure I can, let's do this.
All right! Thank you! Kisses! I've just been invited to a soap opera! Mommy is back on television! You're talking to the sister-in-law of the Queen of France's lover! I can't believe it worked! It's almost official.
But once Silvio speaks to me, he'll understand my charisma.
- Nobody resists Samantha! - Mommy's going to be beheaded! Yes! And it was so easy! You didn't have to do anything.
What do you mean? I used the power of internet in my favor, right, Laila? Sincerely, I'm not thankful.
Hey, Laila, look what I made for you.
Guava croissants of forgiveness.
Don't you want to post this on social media? Look, a couple that deserves each other.
You were made for one another! Hashtag "ciao".
They contain gluten! Laila, some girl wants to tear my skin off, she's nine! It's Silvio! Watch and learn.
Hi, Silvio, how are you, honey? Long time! Yes, we can talk! I can't meet in person, I'm in Paris.
Oh, you too? Well, it's just that I'm super busy, but No! The soap opera is my priority! Always! No How far is Paris? Silvio, here's the thing I'm stuck in traffic.
There's snow everywhere.
Silvio, for God's sake, we know each other! Hello? Hello, Silvio? Hello? Did he hang up? I needed to be in Paris.
I didn't even want to do this soap opera, it's an outdated genre.
Actually, I was going to do it for Silvio.
I need to focus on me.
Croissant? No, but it's OK.
I don't want you following that girl! Enough of this horrible green hair! - You were jealous.
- Me, jealous? Dodoi, you know what? All of this is your fault.
You went to a party looking for work, look what you found.
- What did I find? - What? I forgot Laila's name but I scheduled a meeting with a sports radio station.
You must have given a great first impression.
- And you were jealous.
- Jealous? Stop! - You were jealous.
- I was not.
You and your lousy taste for women.
- Ouch, Mom.
- What, honey? It's coming out.
I just woke up, guys.
I'm here having a coffee, eating my typical Parisian croissant.
I found our mysterious brunette.
Coming soon, Passion and Revolution 2: The Fall of the Bastille.
If they don't have bread, let them eat croissant! Oui! Subtitle translation by Leticia Bianco