MARVEL Spider-Man (2017) s02e05 Episode Script

School of Hard Knocks

Whoo-hoo! A view like this would make anybody feel like a hero.
[J.
JONAH JAMESON] Breaking news! And I do mean "breaking.
" As the Big Apple's own mighty Avengers bash their way through an unexpected onslaught of Asgardian Frost Giants bent on spreading their evil agenda into our world! Aah! Leave it to Tony Stark and company to show us all what real heroism looks like.
Hey, menace, move along before Stark comes down to deal with you.
Ohh.
Thanks to J.
Jonah Jameson at the Daily Bugle, my reputation is in the Dumpster.
If only some of that Avengers glow could rub off on me.
Huh? I didn't mean literal glow.
What's going on here? How about you pick on someone your own size? Or me, in this case.
She tried to zap me! [GASPING] Huh? It's the tubes.
237.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah The power Aah! Yo, I'm out! [PANTING] Can't stop 237! So So much power! Yaah! Are you okay? Not that I don't appreciate an electric personality, but someone's gonna get hurt.
I've been chosen for 237.
Testing special project Extra credit Uhh! Okay.
I guess making sense is overrated.
- Must - Whoop! pass test! Wait.
This is part of some test? If so, can we skip to the essay portion? It's probably less dangerous.
Aah! [CRYING] Hey.
Freaky, super-strong teenager with crazy eyes and energy blasts.
Okay, I got this.
Aah! [ROARING] Whoa! Whoa! Aah! I don't got this! Got to thwip this with absolute precision.
[GASPING] Hey, everyone.
Uh what's up? [GIRL GROANING] No one appreciates a solid pun.
I'll wrap you up nice and tight for when the police come, okay? 237 [GRUNTS] 237 Still with this "237" thing? Huh? She's a student.
The Bilderberg Academy? Could 237 be a locker number or something? Time to investigate.
Hey, uh, I just wanted to pop in and give this back to my cousin.
She left it at my house.
Nobody pops into the Bilderberg Academy.
Oh, uh, right.
[GUARD] Morning, Headmaster Rappaccini.
Good morning, Don.
How's little Margie? Over the flu? Just fine.
Thank you, ma'am.
Come on, Douglas.
I don't know why you weren't picked.
I don't do the selections.
Uh ahem.
Hey, as a Student Safety Monitor, I'm just doing my job and making sure my fellow students like you get to class, you know, [WHIMPERING] safely.
Hey.
Whew.
Boy, am I glad I found you guys.
I am so lost.
Who are you? Where's your uniform? Oh, uh, sorry.
I'm new.
I was just trying to figure out where to go, and I heard you say how it's your job.
You need to report to the supply hall and get your uniform ASAP.
I'll take him.
Thanks.
I'm Grady.
Grady Scraps.
I'm, uh, Park.
Park Peterson.
Huh.
Weird name.
Hmph.
[CHATTER] No, no, no.
I wouldn't say "picked on.
" Everyone's just jealous because Headmaster Rappaccini and I are tight.
Whenever there's a special project, I'm her first call.
Wow.
Special projects like? Here's the supply hall.
Just flash your ID, and they'll hook you up.
Oh-ho, ohh.
[CHUCKLES] Guess what I left in my room.
Don't sweat it.
I'm kind of a big deal around here.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES] Locker numbers.
All five digits.
There goes my 2-3-7 theory.
[CHATTER] Here.
Put that on, and you won't have to worry about any uniform demerits.
Okay.
Thanks.
Well, I don't want to keep you, so Oh, please.
You helped me out with Douglas.
The least I can do is give you a personal tour.
[GRADY] I know what you're thinking best library ever.
This is my secret thinking spot.
Oh.
I can see Headmaster Rappaccini down there.
Hi! [THINKING] So much for keeping a low profile.
Sure, my experiment shot smelly green goop all over, but they didn't have to be mean about it.
Wow.
Huh.
Feels good to get this off my chest.
Thanks, man.
You get me.
- Wait.
What's in there? - Yeah, no.
Room 237's off-limits.
I mean, not for me and a couple other elite kids.
That's where the special, special projects happen.
[SPIDER-MAN] Room 237's right inside there.
Time for a stakeout.
Exciting! Exciting.
Exciting.
Pshew! Pshew.
Pshew.
Pshew, pshew, pshew.
Pshew pshew pshew pshew pshew.
Exciting [GASPS] [SIGHS] [SNORING] [SIGHS] What am I expecting here? Another teen with crazy super-powers to just pop by? [GRUNTS] And a teen with crazy super-powers.
Careful what you wish for.
Okay.
Looks like I lost sneaky power teen already.
I wait three hours with no snacks to find a clue, and the first thing I do is Uhh! Every bug's worst nightmare.
Stop making so much noise.
Ms.
Marvel? Call Tony.
[PHONE RINGING] The Ms.
Marvel? [GASPS] I've seen you.
Oh, you're great.
Are you calling Tony Stark? Because I totally know him.
We teamed up once.
[RINGING CONTINUES] Kind of busy running point here, Ms.
Marvel.
Some Avengers are out on ops so dark, even I don't know where they are.
I've got a tagalong Spider-Man.
He must be that weird kid I saw scouting out the school today.
Spider-Man? Are you sure it's him? Webs, tights, annoying? Totally him.
Put PJ's on.
Tony? Hey.
Hi.
It's me.
There was this girl with powers who went to this school, and she was all, "237," and I was all, "Is that a locker number?" and Look, kid, I don't have time to sort this out.
Ms.
Marvel's on Avengers business, so I guess you are now, too.
[BOTH] Wait.
What? Are you saying I'm an Avenger? - No.
- No.
Listen, Tony, for someone who is apparently undercover, he didn't - Oh.
I'm super stealthy.
- Hey.
Quit it.
Sorry.
Telling PJ's to scram won't get us anywhere.
He's just as eager as you, so make the best of it, okay? Besides, two heads are better, right? Play nice.
Uhh! So, uh, you guys are looking into the crazy super-teen, too, huh? Super strong with these, uh, energy blasts.
Which would all be cool if she wasn't babbling like a crazy person.
You know what that's like? I can imagine.
[GASPS] Whoa.
[GRUNTS] [CHATTER] [SCANNER BEEPS] The Avengers intercepted chatter about an experimental weapons program being somehow linked to this school.
This is the only place at Bilderberg I haven't been able to check out yet.
[MS.
MARVEL] Bilderberg is a front for AIM? [SPIDER-MAN] Advanced Idea Mechanics that team of super-science bad guys? I've taken some of them down before.
Iron Man is gonna be so impressed with me.
With you? [SPIDER-MAN] Whoops.
[SPLAT] What was that? - Intruder! - Uh-oh.
Halt! We've got you! [GROANS] Did I say Iron Man would be impressed? I think we interupted their evil science fair or something.
Yaah! [GRUNTS] [SHOUTING] Ooh, Ms.
Marvel, what big hands Don't.
What? You heard that one before? Quick, take off your costume.
Um, uh, what? The bad guys are looking for Spider-Man and Ms.
Marvel.
Ohh! I get it.
Secure the perimeter.
Lock down the south and west gates, and leave no stone unturned.
Now, now.
One foot apart, lovebirds.
[SIGHS] That was close.
Yes, we were.
Heh.
I mean, I-it was.
Look, sorry about being a jerk when we were talking to Tony, but this was supposed to be my first Avenger solo mission, and I wasn't really counting on a sidekick.
That's okay.
[DIALING] We actually make a pretty good team.
I Wait.
Sidekick? I can't believe AIM is running this school.
We've got to tell Tony.
Yes.
We should totally call for backup and definitely not figure out what AIM is up to by ourselves, even though that would be the most epic first solo mission ever.
Technically, it's not a solo mission anymore, but I like the way you think.
Okay.
Step 1 get back into AIM's high-security underground lair so we can get our eyes on whatever AIM's special project is.
Which we can't do without one of those all-access swipey IDs.
I might know a guy.
So, being an Avenger that's got to be great, right? Like the part where people don't hurl insults at you while you're saving them.
Oh, sure.
It's always roses.
Like when your every move gets compared to a prince of Asgard and the literal Captain of America.
Plus, I love always following orders and never doing my own thing.
Sorry.
But for what it's worth, I'm excited to be working with you.
Uh, because you're a good superhero.
- That's the only reason.
[BEEPING] - Found him.
Ugh.
Who is it? Huh.
I guess no one.
[KNOCK ON DOOR] Guys, stop messing around.
I'm trying to work.
Oh.
Headmaster.
We need to bring the remaining candidates online now.
B-But the DNA sequencing isn't ready.
We'll have the same problem as last time.
Grady, hostiles have been spotted on campus.
If we don't do this now, all the progress we've worked for is at risk.
I-I guess I can try to make adjustments on the fly.
What? Douglas? He is definitely not ready.
Hey, it's like you said, Grady.
You don't pick the candidates.
I guess after tonight, you won't be the only special one around here.
[SCANNER BEEPS] You two are the last feasible candidates.
Unfortunately, we must move forward before the procedure can be perfectly aligned to your DNA.
But I'm confident at least one of you will emerge as the new vanguard of AIM's forces.
AIM is experimenting on students? Guess I was right about the evil science fair.
I'm worried about injury to the volunteers.
I'll let you know when you should be worrying, Mr.
Scraps.
[SPIDER-MAN] Hulk, Captain Marvel, and Captain America? What is AIM doing to them? We've got to help them.
We can't just rush in.
We'd never make it to them.
Initiate energy transfer on my mark.
Mark! [GROANING] I'm so buff! [LAUGHING] Pretty sure the school board wouldn't approve of this.
[MS.
MARVEL] This just got really real.
Avengers emergency distress signal engaged.
We're deep underground.
You sure Tony's gonna get that signal? Hope so, 'cause the odds are slim that you and I can take out these AIM guys, plus Douglas with the powers of two Captains and a Hulk.
Yeah, but if backup might not be coming from the outside, then let's round up some backup from in here.
So much power He's going to lose control, just like the last one.
Focus, Douglas.
You are an initiate of AIM.
You will fight the forces of ignorance that undermine our progress.
Now show us what you can do.
[CHUCKLING] That guy Douglas I met him.
He was a bully even before he got powers.
Prepare the chamber again.
But our volunteers' vitals are low.
- If I had more time - Time is a luxury we don't have.
If we detach the power, we might be able to get them free.
Sticking your noses into other people's business? Around here, that earns you a beatdown.
Spider-Man? Ms.
Marvel? Were they trying to free the subjects? What's going on? Ignore them.
Initiate the energy transfer now! But don't those two know the Avengers volunteered for this research? Progress always has its enemies, Mr.
Scraps.
Focus on your work.
[GRUNTS] Hey, Douglas, eat superhero team-up.
I never liked that guy.
[GROANING] You fools cannot stop me the Scientist Supreme, leader of AIM.
More like "scientist supremely aggravating.
" Haah! Try to get them out of there.
I'll cover you.
An Avenger is covering me in battle! That's got to automatically make me at least half-Avenger by default, right? Quarter? [SCREAMING] [GROANING] [GRUNTS] Subject number 2.
Perfect.
Destroy the intruders! What with all the impending doom, I should just let you know now, it was cool working with you.
Back at ya.
Embiggen! [CRASH] Hey, want to be friends? Whoa! Guess not.
Your loss.
[SHOUTING] You're no match for AIM, you fool! Maybe not alone, but Superhero smackdown! [GROANS] AIM, box them in.
Pour it on! Kid, you seem like an okay guy.
How'd you get wrapped up with criminals like AIM? AIM is a criminal organization? They said they were scientists.
Trust me.
You can be both.
Oh, man.
I thought I was doing a good thing.
Maybe getting some extra credit out of it, too.
Okay, so you wound up turning your classmates into evil super weapons.
How do we undo it? Get them into the chamber, and I'll try to reverse the process.
Yaah! I think not.
Aah! What are you doing? It's not calibrated for me! Yaah! Grady! We'll get you out of there, buddy! Ugh! His DNA is not a match! Aah! Aah! [SPIDER-MAN] Before Grady recovers, get Super Kids 1 and 2 into the chamber, and I'll try to send the power back upstream.
"Sending power back upstream" does not sound like real science.
Whoa! I think I think that's it! Where's my extra credit? [ALL GROANING] Guys, are you okay? Hulk! Big guy! You may have stopped this operation, but now we have the two of you to add to our experiment! Aah! Stop talking.
Thank you, Ms.
Marvel.
Somebody send a distress signal? Yeah.
I'd say villain class is dismissed.
If I knew what was going on, I would never have been a part of it.
It's not like Headmaster Rappaccini said, "Hey, do you want to imprison the Avengers?" Because my answer would have been, "No way!" Wha What's going on? Your school was a front for a mad scientist trying to take over the world.
Bad news some of your teachers were evil.
Good news you'll probably get a couple days off.
- Yeah! Hey! Yeah! All right! - Whoo-hoo! So, maybe not the solo mission I was hoping for, but, as team-ups go, you make a great sidekick.
Well, I just Wait.
I'm nobody's sidekick! If the Avengers ever need any help with their computer systems, I've kind of got some free time now.
Thanks, but between Tony Stark and Bruce Banner, we're kind of covered.
- Whoa! - Ohh! Yeah.
Got to say, your team is impressive.
Come on.
Okay, everybody.
Smile! Photo bomb! [TIMER TRILLS] [SHUTTER CLICKS] Huh? "Thanks for the assist.
"For a menace, you make a pretty decent hero, "and an even better friend.
Best, Ms.
M.
" You, sir, are friends with Avengers.
"P.
S.
Check out today's newspaper.
Should help with your image.
" [PANTING] I bet a headline about Spidey becoming the Avengers' BFF will do wonders for my rep.
[GASPS] Oh, come on!