Star vs. the Forces of Evil (2015) s03e20 Episode Script

Divide (Part 1, Part 2)

1 [" I'm from Another Dimension" by Brad Breeck plays.]
It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from 'round here I'm from another dimension Gonna get a little weird Gonna have a good time I ain't from 'round here I'm from another woo-hoo Yeh-heah I'm talking rainbows I'm talking puppies Pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa Paaa It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from 'round here I'm from another dimension [Star.]
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Okay, and how exactly big was this portal? [stammering.]
It was huge.
I mean, massive.
"Ginormous portal" And you say it was rainbow colored? Yes, all kinds of swirling colors.
She went to it like a moth to a flame.
- Ah, right, I know that one.
- I'm so sorry.
Moon would have stooped her if I hadn't interfered.
Now Meteora's heading this way.
[pen clicks.]
Okay, well, that about covers it.
Guards! [Lady Whosits and guard.]
Hup hup hup hup hup! Hmm! Not me.
Her.
Hup hup hup hup hup! [clank.]
Star, what are you going to do? [Eclipsa.]
What are you going to do to my daughter? Come on, Marco.
Hup hup hup hup - Hup hup.
- Uh [lock clicks.]
Kyle? [Kyle.]
Uh, I'm I'm in here.
Hey, you doing okay with this queen thing? Ugh! I'm not queen.
I'm acting queen.
My mom's still out there! Right! Right, right, right, right, right.
Acting queen! Well, are you doing okay, acting queen? Marco! I'm freakin' out, man! I know.
I'm freakin' out, too! Being a queen's squire, it's like a a big deal.
- Mmm.
- Sorry, acting queen.
Everybody's looking at me for decisions, but all I can think about is my mom.
[music.]
Ohh, what would Mama do? What What are you doing? Waiting for an answer.
- [trumpet blares.]
Aah! - Queen Star.
Acting queen.
We have a situation that demands your attention.
May I present Mr.
Bugbert Swampington and his family.
Aah! What happened to 'em?! Big monster ramp-ragin' through the countryside, gave 'em the eye and made 'em all floaty.
- Meteora.
- Sir, I assure you the Butterflys are on this job, and we will fix this.
You have my word.
Yeah? All right.
[blaring.]
Manfred! Stop with the horn.
Sorry, my queen.
The scouting raven has returned with news of the monster.
The monster, it approaches the castle! Must fly away! - What do we do, my queen? - We're gonna figure it out.
Bless you, Queen! Bless you.
[Rhombulous.]
What do we do?! [all arguing.]
Okay, everybody, hi.
Thanks for coming.
Look, my mom is gone.
Uh, she's coming back.
Workin' on that.
In the meantime, we need to come up with - Hey! What are you doing here? - Uh, counseling you? No! No! No, no, no, no, no! I'm sorry, no liars allowed.
Leave now! Out, out, out, out! Go! Out! - [Rhombulous.]
Big mistake.
- [Hekapoo.]
You're gonna need us.
[Omnitraxus.]
Omnitraxus Prime has spoken! Uhh! Okay, here's where we're at.
Meteora is on her way here right now to destroy us all, and so far nobody has been able to stop her.
Pretty serious.
So I am opening up the floor for any ideas you've got.
[forced chuckle.]
C'mon, gang, there's no dumb suggestions! Sir Scarsguard! You've led the Mewni army against legions of marauding monsters for three generations.
You even taught me how to wield a sword.
- In this time of crisis, your expertise - What'd she say? She said that there's a monster that they want you - What? - You to go and fight, to be fighting the monster.
- I can't hear a word.
- [louder.]
There's a monster - Not a single word! - That they would like you - I must be out of batteries.
- You're not even trying.
You see? - He acts like that thing doesn't work.
- Okay, uh, thank you, - Lord and Lady Scarsguard.
- Welcome to my life.
[Whimpers.]
Okay [taps table.]
- Sir Muscleton! - What's up, baby girl.
What did you [chair legs squeak.]
What did you call me? I think I called you baby girl.
Aah! Yeah, so Sir Dashing of Muscleton isn't gonna be able to help us.
Marco, what do ya got? What about Mina Loveberry? Oh, right, Mina! [laughs.]
Perfect! That nut mix is a one-woman army! Way ahead of you! We already sent Mina out to do just that.
- Aha-ha, great! - And she lost.
[balloon-like squeak.]
- Queen Star? - Acting queen! We just need to know what the Royal Kitchen should make for dinner.
Just choose anything! Queen Moon always decided on the menu, not us.
Okay.
Well, today's the day you start! - Surprise me.
- Of course.
What would you like us to surprise you with? [music.]
Star! Wait! - What is it, Dad? - I want to help you plan.
Oh, Yes! Oh, thank you, Papa.
How do we stop Meteora? No, I meant the dinner menu.
I've got some ideas.
Ugh, not helping, Dad.
I'm sorry, Star, but you're queen now.
I've seen how strong you've grown.
You'll figure it out.
And whatever you decide, I'll back you! Think about a corn medley.
Cornbread, cornmeal.
That's an entire meal of corn.
[sighs.]
Thanks, Dad.
I do love corn.
Globgor! [Star groans.]
Mommm! Your job is really hard! I need your help.
I can't do this alone.
[sighs.]
[sniffs.]
Glossaryck, what do I do? - Globgor! - Arghh! Globgor! [Star growls.]
Uh, buddy, the chefs are working on dinner, but they wanted me to ask you about dessert.
Argh! How am I supposed to delegate anything to these cornheads? Can't anybody here actually think for themselves - without my mom around? - Good day, acting Queen Butterfly! Finally, somebody gets it right.
I have your laundry, freshly pressed! Thank you, just leave it on the thing.
I've sorted it all from your favorite to least favorite color and removed a couple stains I found.
I also re-dyed a few items to better compliment your skin tone.
Oh thank you.
That's actually really helpful.
I also ironed your socks and re-hemmed - your favorite dinosaur skirt.
- Wow, that's amazing.
It seemed better to head off the problem before it got worse.
Why didn't I see it before?! Lavabo, its you! - Me? - Him?! You! Steadfast Lavabo, dependable Lavabo! Sir Lavabo, I have a job for you.
- What?! - My queen, it would be an honor - to serve you in any way - No, no.
No, no, no.
Nuh-uh, no way.
Can you, um Can you please excuse us for just a What are you thinking? You can't send him! Do you have a better plan, squire? Because I have been waiting to hear one all day! - Me.
Send me.
- You? Marco, no offense, but it's gonna take more than a red belt to defeat Meteora.
You forget I have 16 years of experience fighting thousands of Hekapoos.
Go ahead, hit me with your best spell! - Marco, I'm not gonna fight you.
- Weeaakkk! Ugh! Come on, Marco, I really don't have time for this nonsense - Strawberry Shake Quake! - Hyah! Yah! Come on, Star, I said your best spell! [chomps.]
- Narwhal Blast! - Yah! Hi-yah! Rude! - My turn! - Uh! Not cool! [blowing raspberries.]
Warnicorn Stampede! [whinnying and neighing.]
Yah! [both whinnying.]
Hi-yah! Hi-yah! Hah! Hah! Sparkle Kitten Firework Shower! [loud meowing.]
[Star.]
Honeybee Tornado Swarm! [bees buzzing.]
[Marco.]
Hah! [panting.]
Ha! Is that all you got? [growling.]
- Spider with a Top Hat Blast! - War cryyy! - Aaah! - Whoa-ho! - Aaaah! - Aaaah! Glooobgor! [grunting.]
[squeaks.]
[both panting.]
[clatter.]
- Okay, not bad, Diaz.
- [laughs.]
Told you! - No, Star, my abs are not back.
- Just checking.
Look, just because you can take on my spells doesn't mean you can take on Meteora.
I don't know if anyone can.
Your mom can.
You heard what Eclipsa said.
If she hadn't interfered, your mom would have beaten Meteora.
I don't have to stop her.
I just have to buy you time to find your mom and bring her back.
Okay, we gotta divide and conquer.
[music.]
You keep Meteora from reaching the castle while I go find my mom.
- How are you gonna do that? - My mom is stuck in the magic dimension.
- I gotta go there to find her.
- But that's where you lost your memory.
- That's really dangerous.
- I know, but I don't have a choice.
Okay, as acting queen, I order you, my squire Marco Diaz, to do whatever it takes to stop Meteora - from reaching Butterfly Castle.
- I accept my orders.
Okay, well, then you get started on that order right away.
Hey, Star.
Y'know, you don't have to pretend to be strong around me.
- I'm your best friend.
- Mmm.
Uhh! I need a hug! [music.]
- I'm really scared.
- Yeah me, too.
Hello, Queen Butterfly! Dinner is served! - Great talking.
- Yes.
Thank you, friend.
- Just a talk, bro.
- Uh anyway, we did what you said.
We got creative! [jiggling.]
- Good first try.
- Can I go now? [music.]
Oh, hey! It's you! You wanna paddle around with me? No! Nu-nu-nu-nu-no way, buster! If I have fun with you, I'll forget who I am and be stuck here forever.
Yeah! Doesn't that sound great?! Nice try, but this time I came prepared! [buzzing.]
[Star, on recording.]
You are Star Butterfly.
You must find your mom and bring her home.
I am Star Butterfly.
I must find my mom and bring her home.
Okay, have fun! I'll see ya soon! I've called you all here because you're the most cunning, the most agile, the most experienced, hardest hitting wahoos I know.
Each of you were hand-picked for your specific set of skills.
Hekapoo's basically a one-woman army, and she's also on fire.
[rock guitar riff.]
Talon is is really big, and I think Hekapoo has a crush on him, but it's probably just because of his body.
- Wait.
What? - [Marco.]
And then Jorby and Kelly - Ahhh! - They're, um, well Kelly's got a lot of swords! Anyway, I feel proud to call you my "Marc-nificent Seven.
" [Jorby speaking gibberish.]
Oh, yeah, good point.
You're right, Jorby.
Yeah, Jorby says, uh, your math is off.
Yeah, there's only, uh There's only four of us here plus you.
That's five.
Two short of a seven.
He forgot about me! - Uh - Who's that? No, I I didn't forget about you.
I You're late.
And what is that thing on your head? Oh, that's just my battle axe.
I'm basically like a cyborg now.
I could change into anything I want.
Mascara brush, little tiny Ponyhead.
[tiny whinny.]
- Chainsaw! [buzzing.]
- Okay, I get it, Ponyhead.
- Talon! What are you doing? - What am I doin'? I'm handing out shades for our group victory photo.
We're not doing a group photo.
Dude, every group I've ever run with takes a cool sunglasses group shot.
[rock guitar riff.]
Are Are those Little League teams? Little?! There's nothin' little about them! You don't know what it's like to be alone on the field, your friends covered in boo-boos and ouchies.
[Tom.]
Hey! [flames hissing.]
[organ music playing.]
Listen to your commander.
Ha! See? I told you there were seven of us.
- Boom.
Eat that Kelly.
- Earthturd! Are you gonna tell us the plan or what?! Oh, yes.
The plan is simple.
We're gonna build The Doom Nut.
[blade rings.]
Jorby and Kelly, you're gonna make a huge dugout circle.
Talon and Pony will fill it with wood.
When Meteora steps inside, Tom's gonna set the wood on fire, trapping her in a flaming prison.
Ohh, "Doom Nut," because it looks like a doughnut! Earthturd, that is very clever.
I am into this plan.
I'll open up the floor to questions if there's anything you'd like to ask me about the plan of this thing in my hand that I'm holding.
Oh.
Well, I'll just take the bait here.
Where did you get that sword, Marco? Oh! This old thing? Funny you should ask.
This is El Choppo.
I got this sword from the mists of the Never Zone when I was in my early 30s, and it's still even got some dried blood on it.
Any other questions? Yes, Kelly? Wait, how are we going to convince her to step into what is an obvious trap? Ya know, I'm no longer into this plan.
Simple, Kelly, we use the best bait.
- Me.
- Aah! - Dude.
- Sorry.
[splashing.]
Find Mom.
Find Mom.
Find Mom.
Find Mom.
Find Mom.
[jellyfish moaning.]
Whoa! [phone buzzing.]
Aah! [Star, on recording.]
You are Star Butterfly.
You must find your mom and bring her home.
Right! Find Mom! [jellyfish moaning.]
[Kelly, imitating back-up warning.]
Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Click! Click! [grunting.]
[rock guitar riff.]
Whoo! I'm beat! [Chuckles.]
[gulping.]
Dude! Save some for me.
[mouth full.]
Oh, my bad.
- [spits.]
Well, here you go.
- Ehh Marco, you know, I I kind of treated you bad sometimes.
Like that Ping-Pong game, or the the Blood Moon Ball, those Mackie Hand tickets, Naysaya - I I get it, Tom.
- The monster arm.
- That wasn't you.
- It wasn't? Anyway.
Look, the point is, I actually think you're a great dude.
Whatever happens today, we'll make it through.
Thanks, Tom.
[music.]
I'm really glad you're here.
[calling out.]
Mom?! Find Mom, find Mom, find Mom.
Find mmm mmm mmm [popping sounds.]
Marshmallow? [popping sounds.]
Marshmallow? Find marshmallow! [unicorn whickers.]
What ya drinkin'? [startled whinny.]
It's okay.
I'm not gonna hurt ya.
[whispering.]
Please don't go.
Huh? [gasps.]
Find Mom! Find Mom, find Mom, find Mom.
Find Mom, find Mom, find Mom, find [inspiring music.]
[rock guitar riff.]
Whoo! Whoo-whoo! [tires squeal.]
Um, I cannot see! Can everyone else see, 'cause I cannot! All right, Marc-nificent Seven, it's go-time.
[tires squealing.]
- Who Who was that? - That was That was Marco.
He's gonna look great in that photo.
[music.]
Find Mom, find Mom, find Mom, find Mom, find Mom, find Mom.
Find Mo Mom! - Hello there.
Mmm! - Mommy! Mom, you might not remember who you are or who I am, but I'm here to take you home.
What's "home"? [uneasy laugh.]
Okay, you are Moon [phone buzzes.]
[recording.]
You are Star Butterfly.
I am Star Butterfly.
Aah! No, no, no, no! Shut up, me! You are Moon Butterfly.
Look.
This is you.
And this is your husband.
I am your daughter.
We are your family.
Do you remember? [buzzing.]
You are Star Butterfly.
- I am Star Butterfly.
- Ugh! [splash.]
You are comin' with me! - Where are we going? - We are going to I have no idea.
Woe is me! A rebel princess in distress named Turdina! Nachos, my precious steed, what will I do? [loud footsteps.]
[crows cawing.]
All right, Nachos, stick to the plan.
[footsteps echoing.]
Are you okay? Uh, sorry.
Looking for a different monster.
I just thought you needed help.
Yeah.
Actually hey, we could really use your help! Huh Well, now it just kind of feels weird.
I don't know.
Good luck finding your monst [loud zapping.]
[sing-song.]
I'm right here! Huh? [Gasps.]
[Nachos sputtering.]
Really?! [roars.]
[music.]
Whoa-ho! [screaming.]
[Marco.]
Whoa! Jorby! Go! Go go go go go! [roars.]
Now, Tom! Huh? Ohh! Hey, Metenormous! Looks like you're trapped! I think I think we did it! Whaa! [dramatic music.]
Hey, what's the plan now? Run.
[jellyfish moaning.]
[music.]
[splashing.]
- Whatcha doin' over there? - I don't know, feels good though.
I want to feel good, too.
Let me try.
What the What are these symbols? [phones buzzing.]
[overlapping recordings.]
You are Star Butterfly.
You must find your mom and bring her home.
You are Star Butterfly.
You must find your mom and bring here home.
I'm Star Butterfly! Oh, no! It's happening again! - Mom! Mom, Mom, get up! - Huh? We have to go right now.
[Queen Moon.]
Ooh! What is that? It's amazing! Whoa it is amazing! Turdina?! I know we've had our issues, but it's nothing we can't talk about! [panting.]
Come on, Star! Hurry up! Whaa! [Hekapoo, straining.]
Marco! Dude, get up.
[all groaning.]
[grunts.]
I don't know how much more we can take of this.
[Meteora/Heinous.]
Hey! You might've put out someone's eye! [swords clanging.]
[growls.]
- Talon, launch me! - You got it.
Haaaa! [clank.]
Aah! I don't hear nothin'.
She's dead, right? I won? Where's Star? [Queen Moon laughing.]
[Star.]
Oooh! # La la la # She's a princess winning battles Through the break of dawn Don't worry when it's night 'Cause she will keep the lights on Ohh, there goes a shining star - # Evil won't deter her # - # No, sir! # - # 'Cause magic flows through her # - # Star Butterfly # She is a shining star
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