Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) s07e04 Episode Script

9059-054 - Venice on the Half Shell

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half-shell Turtle power! They're the world's Most fearsome fighting team LEONARDO: We're really hip.
They're heroes In the half-shell And they're green RAPHAEL: Hey, get a grip.
When the evil Shredder Attacks These Turtle boys Don't cut him no slack Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Splinter taught them to be Ninja teens LEONARDO: He's a radical rat.
Leonardo leads Donatello does machines DONATELLO: That's a fact, Jack.
Raphael is cool but crude RAPHAEL: Give me a break.
Michelangelo is a party Dude MICHELANGELO: Party! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half-shell Turtle power! [.]
[.]
Hmph.
Are we having fun yet? Get with it, Raphael.
Venice is one of the most beautiful cities in the world.
Blech.
Not to mention the wettest.
Face it, dude.
This burg is just not happening.
But, guys, this place is rich in history.
I don't know about you, but my ninja moves are feeling rusty.
Hi-ya! Whoa! Hey! Watch it, dude.
Sit down, Leonardo.
You're rocking the boat.
Whoa-oh! Uh, hey! Wait up! Guys! Oh, Donatello, keep steering in the same direction.
I smell pizza.
KRANG: Everything on this dilapidated piece of space junk needs repairs.
[GROANS.]
[WHIMPERS.]
Lucky for us, we bought that extended warranty.
I want off this crummy asteroid.
I hate it here.
I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.
Ooh.
I must turn my Foot Soldiers into an unbeatable army of computerized warriors.
All I need are, mm, several billion new parts.
And how do you plan to pay for that? It will cost a fortune.
KRANG: This is where the money will come from.
Venice, Italy.
Is that palace trimmed in what I think it is? Yes.
Solid gold.
And it's filled with art masterpieces worth a fortune.
Did you say "Venice"? Isn't that where we last tracked the Ninja Turtles? Precisely.
I plan to double my pleasure and double my fun.
How, by chewing gum? No, you tin-faced twerp.
By capturing the treasures of Venice, I can hold them for ransom and get revenge on those wretched turtles all at the same time.
[.]
Whoa.
Donatello's doing an awesome job steering us through this busy canal.
Hey, Donatello, why don't you watch where you're--? Donatello? Donatello?! Hey, could you guys wait up? I don't know a lot about gondoliering, but most of those guys stay inside the boat.
APRIL: Oh, and I just adore my Paris apartment, chief.
[FRENCH ACCENT.]
It is, how you say, très élégant.
Well, forget the French and start learning Italian.
I'm sending you to Venice, Italy for a few days.
Venice? What's the story? The big Mardi Gras and regatta starts tomorrow.
You know the kind of stuff we need.
Local color, costumes, festooned gondolas.
What an idea.
An April O'Neil exclusive from Venice.
The city of poetry, art and-- Romance.
Tall, dark, handsome Italian men.
Pasta, more Italian men.
More pasta, more-- Give me that.
Tell her the best part, Mr.
T.
I know I'm going to regret this.
Vernon thinks he'll get seasick in a gondola.
So I'm sending Irma to be your assistant.
Great.
Oh, I'm crazy about this foreign assignment.
I can't believe I'm actually being paid to do this.
If you're insulted by the money-- Only kidding.
[.]
I'm thinking of writing a book.
A Down and Dirty Look at the Sewers of the World.
What do you think? Catchy title.
[DEVICE BEEPS.]
The Turtlecom.
Donatello here.
Great news, turtles.
I'll be in Venice tomorrow to cover the Mardi Gras for Channel 6.
Mardi Gras? You know, costumes, masks and carnivals.
Totally tubular, dudes.
It's party time.
This I proudly call the Hydrofluxer.
Oh, it looks real complicated to me.
Chewing gum looks complicated to you, horn-head.
Now, pay attention to my plan.
This Hydrofluxer will amplify the gravitational pull of the full moon.
Keep your eyes on this ridiculously expensive scale model I had built to demonstrate it.
Using its molecular wave intensifier, I will flood Venice.
This will force the citizens to evacuate, leaving their gold and treasures for me to plunder.
[LAUGHS.]
ALL: Whoa! [ALL COUGHING AND SPLUTTERING.]
SHREDDER: Brilliant, Krang.
Just brilliant.
Sorry.
Sometimes I get carried away with my own genius.
You get carried away? Uh, but what about the Ninja Turtles? Those shellbacks won't know what him them.
[LAUGHS.]
Now, remember, Shredder, when you arrive in Venice, set up headquarters in the subbasement of the Opera House.
When do I leave? Now seems like a good time.
[SHREDDER SPLUTTERING.]
But not necessarily a good place.
[CACKLES.]
Turtles.
Trapped like sewer rats.
I love it.
Shredder.
Uh-oh, dudes.
Looks like the party's just about to start.
Did you say something about being bored, Raphael? Arrivederci, shellbacks.
[LAUGHING.]
[.]
Head for the high and dry.
If you think you'll escape death, you've got water on the brain.
[LAUGHING.]
[ALL YELPING.]
Stupenduloso, dudes.
Surf's up.
Great idea, Michelangelo.
[ALL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY.]
[.]
RAPHAEL: Made it.
TURTLES: Whoa! [CROWD CHEERING.]
Yo, turtles.
Up here! It's April and Irma.
Leave it to the Ninja Turtles to make a grand entrance.
Hi, guys.
This is some celebration, huh? It was, until Tin Grin showed up.
Shredder? What's he doing here in Venice? I don't know, but I've got a feeling we'll soon find out.
KRANG: Shredder.
Where are you? In the Venice Opera House subbasement.
What does it look like? My apartment? Actually, this looks nicer.
Enough of your feeble humor, Krang.
Where is the Hydrofluxer? There is a tiny problem, Shredder.
The energy cell that feeds the portal needs a few minor repairs.
Is that why I was dumped in the Grand Canal? No, I thought that up myself.
Nice touch, don't you think? The Hydrofluxer is too large for the portal's power capacity.
I'll teleport it piece by piece.
You'll have to reassemble it there.
Wonderful.
Now he's sending me Tinkertoys.
Rocksteady and Bebop will be bringing the assembly instructions.
See that Shredder gets these instructions.
Ciao for now.
[BOTH YELP.]
Bebop and Rocksteady are on their way now.
You're so good to me.
[TRADITIONAL MUSIC PLAYING.]
Mmm.
Great pizza, huh, guys? Truly.
This is one totally bodacious block party.
[LAUGHTER.]
Hey.
A troop of street acrobats.
Come on, let's watch.
It's Bebop and Rocksteady.
Hey.
Quit it.
[ALL LAUGHING AND CHEERING.]
The turtles.
We gotta lose them.
[GROANS.]
I think I'm gonna lose my lunch.
ALL: Hi-ya! Oh, must you guys always do that? We gotta get outta here.
Hey, let's get one of them funny-looking rowboats.
[.]
Uh, coming through, folks.
MAN: Ungh! Pardon me, lady.
Hey, hey, nice costume.
APRIL: What a story.
The chief is gonna love this.
Look out, April.
Those mutants are headed this way.
[SNORTS.]
Afternoon, ladies.
Hey, this boat is made for rocking.
Ha-ha-ha-ha! [BOTH SCREAMING.]
My camera.
It's not waterproof.
Toss it up here, April.
APRIL: All right.
Catch.
Oh! Got it.
Help! I'm falling.
Yeah, I noticed.
[LAUGHS.]
[SCREAMS.]
[COUGHING.]
We'll be fine, Irma.
Just don't panic.
Donatello! Save the tape! "Save the tape"? Aren't our priorities a little mixed-up? Save the assistant! ROCKSTEADY: Start paddling, Bebop.
We gotta get them instructions to the boss.
Too bad we lost Bebop and Rocksteady.
I'd still like to know what Shredder and Krang are up to.
At least I'm getting a great story.
Venice Mardi Gras invaded by Dimension X mutants.
Looks like your boss is getting a lot more than he bargained for.
Speaking of bargains, look at my new Italian bag.
It's ruined.
Don't worry, Irma.
We'll find you a new one.
I'd settle for finding the rest of this guy.
Hold on.
What's this? Looks like some kind of modern art masterpiece.
It's a masterpiece, all right.
A masterpiece of treachery.
One of Shredder's hench-mutants must have dropped it.
So, like, what is it? What's the scoop, Donatello? They look like instructions for assembling some kind of apparatus.
And you can't get much vaguer than that? Oh, no, this is awful.
Horrible.
What is? What is it, Donatello? You gonna let us in on this, or do we get Vanna to start turning letters? These are assembly instructions for a Hydrofluxer with Krang's plans to flood Venice.
Oh, no.
You're kidding.
That's horrible.
Hold on, dudes.
Venice already is flooded.
Uh, no, no.
I'm talking mondo flooded here.
Oh, well, in that case ALL: Turtle power! I don't know one part from the other without the instructions.
You're supposed to be the brain around here.
KRANG: Bebop, you amoeba-brain.
You lost the instructions.
[GRUNTS.]
Never mind, Shredder.
I'll talk you through the assembly.
But first I'll send the final and most important section through the portal.
The molecular wave intensifier.
Yo, dude, picking up anything with a groovy beat? No, just a lot of interference from the Mardi Gras.
I'm looking for a clear channel.
Hold on.
A Dimension X portal entry is taking place.
There's some problem.
The portal energy is weak.
Can you tell what it is they're sending? It's definitely alien metal.
Here comes a readout.
Yes.
Here it is on Krang's inventory list.
It's the molecular wave intensifier.
Does that wave come with a cut and blow-dry? That intensifier sounds intense.
It is.
The Hydrofluxer just might not work without it.
I'm gonna use a stronger magnetic field to try and pull it off-course.
Go for it.
DONATELLO: Well, is it working? It sure is.
Cowabunga.
Duck, dudes.
Whoa.
And I always thought I liked the sound of heavy metal.
Where's that vital part, Krang? What are you blabbering about? I already sent it through the portal.
Well, it never got here, and I don't have time to wait for it.
The Hydrofluxer looks fine without it.
Wait, Shredder.
No, no, don't.
[WHIRRING.]
And it runs fine too.
You fool.
Without the intensifier, the force of the Hydrofluxer can't be controlled.
It could amplify the moon's gravitational pull and turn Venice into crab quiche.
Well, isn't that what you wanted? No.
All those precious treasures will be ruined.
There'll be nothing left for me to ransom.
[.]
[GROWLING.]
[ROARS.]
April.
What's going on? We're in big trouble.
It looks like the turtles weren't able to stop Shredder.
[ROAR.]
Oh, yikes! Stone monster.
[SCREAMING.]
Vernon's never gonna believe this.
He's not the only one.
[ALL SCREAM.]
IRMA: Stop! Put us down! [.]
[.]
Can you trace the Hydrofluxer signal? [IRMA SCREAMING.]
Ow! What was that? It sounded like G above high C.
I'd recognize that decibel anywhere.
It's Irma.
Well, let's track it down.
[.]
Irma's scream came from somewhere around here.
Help! Put us down.
There she is.
And April's with her.
What kind of bird is that? It's no bird, it's a stone griffin.
I'll take care of this rude dude.
I hope you remember to renew your griffin-hunting license.
I got it.
[GRUNTS.]
Correction: It got me! DONATELLO: Hey, you, come back with our friend.
[ALL GRUNTING.]
[BOTH YELPING.]
Oh, thanks, fellas.
Come on, Irma.
We've gotta get back to the launch.
I left my camera.
And I left my cowboy.
Oh, blast, the turtles.
How do they keep doing it? Shredder, those shellbacks have the wave intensifier.
Stop them.
Shredder, do this.
Shredder, do that.
When is it my turn to start giving orders? When your IQ is 968.
655.
Hmmm.
I better save up for a few night-school courses.
What are you up to, Donatello? Just making a few adjustments to this Hydrofluxer part.
[.]
[ROARING.]
How many of those things are there? The molecular wave intensifier.
Hey, this is what the boss was looking for.
Ooh, let's get it to him on the double.
[GROWLING.]
[.]
What do we do now, dudes? Does the word "panic" seem in order? Don't give up the ship just yet, guys.
Pontoons.
Totally excellent concept.
This switch connects the pontoons' propeller with the Turtle Van engine.
That's for all you technically-minded folks at home.
Contact.
[.]
They're gaining on us.
We gotta shake 'em.
Ooh, ooh.
I got a idea.
Rocksteady, you'll never make it.
Aw, don't be such a worrywart hog.
Nice going around with you.
[PEOPLE SCREAMING.]
We're gonna crash.
No, we're not.
Hey, we sunk the turtles.
All right.
Hey, how'd they do that? [INTERFERENCE SQUEALING.]
Mondo move, dude.
If you liked that, you'll be wild about this.
Stop.
Stop! I can't.
I can't! [BEBOP AND ROCKSTEADY SCREAMING.]
[.]
The tidal wave is out of control and racing toward Venice.
Oh! Well, if I can't plunder and steal, I'll just have to settle for total destruction.
All right, Krang.
I have the molecular wave intensifier.
Well, what are you waiting for? Use it.
There, it's done.
What's happening? The tidal wave has stopped.
Everything is reversing.
What have you done? It's those blasted turtles.
They must have tinkered with the intensifier.
You've failed me again.
ALL: Whoa! There they go.
We just missed 'em.
Ah, what a shame.
And we were gonna throw them a going-away party.
Let's see how much damage those scaly shellbacks did to my precious Hydrofluxer.
I despise those turtles.
[SOBBING.]
I despise those turtles.
Ooh.
I hate to see a grown brain cry.
[CROWD CHEERING.]
And so Mardi Gras is once again in full swing.
The citizens of Venice are anxious to find out who these heroes really are under those turtle costumes.
The unmasking will take place tonight at the grand ball at exactly midnight.
[CROWD CHEERING.]
[.]

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