The Adventures Of Puss In Boots (2015) s05e13 Episode Script

A Savage Place

1 [cat purrs, meows.]
[fast, lively flamenco music playing.]
[screams.]
[giggles.]
- [Puss yowling.]
- El Gato! [yowls.]
[Zephelim chanting faintly.]
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
[Zuva.]
Puss of the Boots for centuries, the Zephelim warriors have proven themselves through the ritual of the Zoon-Zaree.
Most have failed, the six fiendish challenges driving them mad, sending them screaming into the wasteland! - [screaming.]
- [spear clatters.]
And now, the first challenge Grooming! Grooming? - Grooming! - [grunts.]
Well - you are in for a real treat.
- [all gasping.]
- What will he do? - Refuses the implements! But how will he groom himself? - [dramatic musical flourish.]
- [slurps.]
[all gasping.]
[chuckles.]
The outlander needs no tools! What sorcery is this? - [slurping.]
- [all moaning.]
Your skills are great, Puss of the Boots.
But the next challenge won't be so easy.
It is heroic posturing! - [sword clinks.]
- Ha ha! En garde! [slo-mo roaring.]
Dancing! [all gasping.]
Spinning through the air! [yowling.]
Yarn-chasing.
[grunts, purrs.]
And finally depth perception! [grunts.]
Depth perception? Yes, the most difficult challenge of all.
You must demonstrate your ability to perceive depth by tossing the sacred crumpled paper into the holy wastepaper basket! Ah, I see.
This is hard for you because you have only one, uh I I You just have one And And it is easier with two.
Uh uh Anyway.
[all chanting.]
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
Zoon-Zaree.
[voices fading.]
Zoon-Zaree.
[tense music.]
[dramatic music.]
[light thud.]
- [all cheering.]
- The Chosen One! The Chosen One! [grunts.]
What is this Chosen One business? They believe you are The One from The Ancient Prophecy.
[chuckles.]
Oh, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You are not getting my hopes up.
Once burned, twice shy, my friend.
You have scored higher on the Zoon-Zaree than anyone in history.
Six out of ten.
That does not seem like a very high score.
I think that dance was at least a nine.
It is the highest score ever.
Do not be greedy! [Puss panting.]
Sorry.
Puss of the Boots, I welcome you into the clan of the Zephelim! [all chanting.]
One of us! One of us! One of us! One of us! One of us! One of us! One of us! [chanting distantly.]
One of us! [thunder booms.]
[chuffs.]
[sniffs and chuffs.]
[clears throat.]
Hey! Are you a talking horse? Uh um no! Aah! A talking horse! That's so suspicious! Regiment, assemble! - [grunting.]
- [whinnies.]
I said no! - [gate creaking.]
- [whinnies.]
[dramatic music.]
[inhales deeply.]
- [high-pitched neighing.]
- [all grunting.]
- [both shouting.]
- [all grunting.]
[both screaming.]
[grunts.]
Ooh! - Aah! - Aah! - [both grunting.]
- Ya! [neighs.]
[yelling.]
[grunts.]
Huh? - [straining.]
- [grunts.]
- [grunts.]
- Why are you hitting yourself? [grunting.]
[Toby.]
Yay! [grunting.]
[all yelling.]
There's too many of them! - [neighing.]
- [all grunting.]
[high-pitched neigh, chuffs.]
[neighing.]
[high-pitched neighing.]
- [all grunting.]
- Quick, get on! [neighing.]
[Toby whimpering.]
[Zuva.]
Now that Puss of the Boots is one of us, we may share with him the secret of the Zephelim.
We live to protect both our world and yours from the demon who slumbers beneath the Netherworld.
A beast so foul none must speak her name.
Some call her the Mother of Fear, or That Which Dwells, the Lurking Terror, the Thing Beneath.
She can be summoned only by a vile, twisted, evil dance! - K'fhoggnarh! - [all gasping.]
What did I say? I just said it.
- None must speak - None must speak her name! Sorry.
The Mother of Fear can only be controlled by the true ruler of the Netherworld, the Tiny Queen.
With her gone, if the demon be summoned, only we Zephelim stand between it and utter destruction.
Then we must end the Blind King's reign! Yes, and bring back the Tiny Queen, that her delicate wings may once again grace the throne.
Her Wings? Zuva, I have a foolproof plan to defeat the king! But, Puss of the Boots, all of our attempts to overthrow him have failed miserably.
It seems that we are just not strong enough.
Not strong enough? I was told that I am not strong enough.
I was told that I am the weakest thing in all of the Netherworld.
But I say to you now that battles are not won by strength of limb or sword.
They are won by strength of character! They are won by strength of heart! They are won by never giving up! [all cheering.]
Will you ever give up? [all.]
No! Will you ever give up? [all.]
No! Will you ever give up? [all.]
No! - [sword clinks.]
- We go! [all yelling excitedly.]
- [gasps.]
- Zuva, if we survive this, there is something that you must understand.
Me? [smooching exaggeratedly.]
I know that in our time together, you have developed Feelings for me.
Uh, what? No, my sweet.
This thing between us, it cannot be.
For I am a nomad, a free spirit.
Um, well oh, darn? I am sad? Try to forget me.
You will not be able to, of course, but try.
[Dulcinea.]
Come on, come on.
We need a new plan.
Don't look at me.
You saw where my last plan got us.
Someone must have an idea! Artephius? [babbles.]
If we tie enough snakes together, we could make a mop that bites! [imitates chewing.]
Babieca? Uh, I I don't want to sound too self-deprecating, but you know you're really desperate when you're considering putting the horse in charge.
Good point.
Toby? Huh? Oh, this is awful! Why did we ever let Puss go? He could always come up with a plan, even if it was just "run in and do swordy stuff.
" Uh, I think it's too late for swordy stuff now.
- [growling.]
- [all gasping.]
[stool clattering.]
The Blind King requests your presence.
Not without a fight! [all yelling.]
Deploy the squizbees! [all grunt.]
- [gasps.]
- Whoa! - [grunting.]
- [all shouting and grunting.]
Ooh! Ah! [screams.]
[splat.]
[tense percussive music.]
[groans.]
[gasps.]
[groaning.]
We have captured the rebels, oh, great Blind King.
[low maniacal chuckling.]
Excellent.
Well, hello, there.
Did you miss me? [all gasp.]
Evil Puss.
The Zephelim with the helmets are the servants of the Blind King.
The armbands they wear force them to do his bidding.
I see.
We will try not to hurt them.
So perhaps now you will tell me this plan of yours? Yes.
It is brilliant in its simplicity.
I will leap blindly into danger! And? That is all.
You Zephelim will fight also.
And then victory! So your plan is for you, the weakest thing in all of the Netherworld, to just start fighting and hope for the best? I do this kind of thing all the time.
The kind of thing where you don't know what you're doing? Mm-hmm.
I like it.
[Zuva.]
For the Tiny Queen! - [grunts.]
- [Puss yelling.]
- [both grunting.]
- [Zephil whimpers.]
[all grunting.]
[gasps.]
[yelling.]
[all grunting.]
Ooh! [gasps.]
Zephelim, charge! - [all yelling.]
- For the Tiny Queen! For the Tiny Queen! [gasps.]
- Ay! - Puss! - [all grunting.]
- Go! [spears clinking.]
[grunts.]
You're the Blind King? [chuckles evilly.]
That's right, little Miss Kitty-Two-Shoes.
- Boo! Did I scare you? - [all whimper.]
- [cackling.]
- [straining.]
Give it up, old man.
That helmet blocks your abilities.
- What? - And apparently your ears too.
Underpantsently what? Like you, I was changed by going through the portal.
[gasps.]
It took my sight, but I soon learned that, while I couldn't see through my eyes, I could see through the eyes of the Netherworld.
[both gasping.]
That's why you always knew what I was planning! I always knew where you were and what you were doing.
In the Netherworld, I see everything! And now that my spy has returned with her information about San Lorenzo, I am ready to attack! I will destroy your town and conquer your world! [maniacal laughter.]
Hey, I'm cackling! Okay, now I get why you call me Evil Puss.
I guess I am kind of evil, huh? Yes! You are.
- [grunting.]
- [all.]
Puss! Get him! [all grunting.]
[groans.]
[both grunting.]
[Puss.]
Whoa! [grunts.]
Whoa! - [straining.]
- [Zephil grunts.]
- Aah! - [gasps.]
[all grunting and yelling.]
Aah! [both grunting.]
- [growls.]
- [both grunting.]
[Puss.]
Evil Puss, I do not care how many eyes you see through.
Fight me, and you will lose! Maybe.
But my bodyguard won't! [Li'l Pequeña.]
Hiya, Puss! [Puss.]
Li'l Pequeña? - [laughing.]
- [Puss.]
What can she - [energy crackling.]
- [Puss whimpering.]
- [all gasping.]
- [Puss yelling.]
Li'l Pequeña, you are in a li'l trouble! [straining.]
Missed me! [groans.]
[screams.]
[panting.]
Dulcine Whoa! [grunts.]
- [Dulcinea yells.]
- [Evil Puss cackling.]
[Puss yells and grunts.]
[both panting.]
[Evil Puss.]
Why must we always fight? [both grunting.]
- [Evil Puss gasps.]
- Huh? [Evil Puss sobbing.]
[laughing.]
Join me.
Together we can rule all the worlds.
[shudders.]
I, uh I am sorry, what? Your eyeballs, man.
- They are really very unsettling.
- [both grunt.]
- [all grunting.]
- [neighing.]
[high-pitched neighing.]
[both grunt.]
[Artephius straining.]
- [all shouting.]
- [straining.]
[all grunt.]
[both straining.]
[Li'l Pequeña.]
Whoo-hoo! Come and get me, little piggy! [Li'l Pequeña.]
Come on! Faster! [grunting.]
- [groans.]
- [both yelling.]
[yelling.]
[grunting.]
Aah! - [Toby grunting.]
- [gasps.]
Toby! [shouting angrily.]
- [shrieking.]
- [shouts.]
[Dulcinea grunts.]
[grunts.]
- [Dulcinea.]
No! - Aah! - [shrieks.]
- [cackles.]
[all grunt.]
Ah [muffled grunting.]
[Hecate yelling.]
[screaming.]
[grunting.]
[rattling.]
[whimpering.]
[Zephelim growling.]
- [both grunting.]
- Huh? [all straining.]
- [grunts.]
- [Puss.]
Whoa! Ah! [panting.]
So, Puss in Boots, now that you've lost, what will you do? Will you join me and rule the world? Or will you die? I I will Dance! [upbeat electronic music.]
What are you doing? What is he doing? Uh, I don't know.
I am summoning.
Summoning? Summoning what? [both gasp.]
[gasps and moans.]
Whoa! Did I tell you to dance? No, I did not! [grunts.]
Who's king here? [thunder crashing.]
Tell me! What are you summoning? I am summoning that.
Huh? [dramatic music.]
[snarling.]
[roaring.]
[all gasping.]
K'fhoggnarh? You idiot! K'fhoggnarh can only be commanded by the ruler of the Netherworld.
And that's me! K'fhoggnarh, destroy my enemies! The Blind King commands it! [cackles.]
[roaring.]
- [all gasping.]
- [snarling.]
[Evil Puss cackling.]
Her delicate wings [gasps.]
Correction! She can only be commanded by the true ruler of the Netherworld.
- [grunts.]
- Hey! [whooshing.]
[bracelet clatters.]
- [all gasping.]
- Ah! [Zephil.]
You're free! - It is her! - She has returned! K'fhoggnarh, destroy my enemy.
Your true ruler commands you.
[snarls and roars.]
Wait! Wait! No! I [grunts.]
I I Ah! [panting.]
[whimpering.]
Oh! - [roaring.]
- No! Oh, my gosh.
Finally, someone took off that stupid bracelet! What took you guys so long? Um, we didn't know.
[scoffs.]
Hey, Hecate! How's it shakin'? Like a nervous Chihuahua, baby.
Hold that thought.
[all moaning in relief.]
- Thank you.
- We're free! K'fhoggnarh! Move your foot! Not that one! Obviously this one! Are you trying to make me mad? [roars softly.]
[all gasping.]
Evil Puss! He's gone! Huh, what is this? Ooh, Mercuric Chalk! That's the stuff I used to send all the other Pusses back home! So Evil Puss could've used this to go to his own world? Yes.
Or anywhere.
There's no way to know.
Eh.
I am still calling this a win.
Puss in Boots, thank you for restoring me to the throne.
You are welcome, oh, great Queen.
I was wrong about you, kitty.
You may be the weakest thing in all of the Netherworld, but you're the greatest hero I've ever known.
[Puss laughs.]
Of course I am.
My gratitude to you is boundless.
Is there anything I can do for you? Well, we have been looking for a way to block the portal to our world.
- Do you have anything big enough? - Hmm [growls.]
[Toby.]
I guess we'll lose our special abilities when we go back.
Are you gonna miss being able to speak? No.
All the small talk is exhausting.
[electricity crackling.]
Oh.
Teensy thing before we go Yes, Artephius? [imitates chewing.]
[clears throat.]
Good-bye, everyone! You have a lovely world here, except for all the giant terrifying eyeballs.
I had a nice time! Good-bye! Farewell.
I shall miss you all.
Especially you, Zuva.
- [smooches.]
- [sighs.]
[electricity crackling.]
[grunts.]
- [sniffles.]
- Ha! - Zuva likes Puss! - Stop it! - Zuva likes Puss! - I do not! Ugh, what are you guys, five? Now get out of the way.
K'fhoggnarh! Back it up! [imitates beeping.]
That's the sound big things should make when they back up.
Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop! [electricity crackling.]
[Puss.]
Hyah! [grunts.]
[mellow flamenco music.]
[sighs contentedly.]
Very good.
My friends, the dreaded portal is now blocked.
All is well in San Lorenzo! [Dulcinea.]
Not really, Puss.
You should see this.
It looks like our graves.
[thunder booms.]
[dramatic music plays.]
[thunder crashing.]
[fast, lively flamenco music playing.]