The Summer I Turned Pretty (2022) s01e04 Episode Script

Summer Heat

1

[BELLY.]
The Fourth of July in Cousins
is all about traditions.

Susannah decks out the whole house,
the dads come up for the weekend,
the boys steam clams
and shoot off fireworks.

All the other Fourth of Julys,
I was just tagging along.

But this year, I have friends.

I have plans.

[JEREMIAH.]
Can I finish your milk?
- Here.

- Mm.

- [LAUGHS.]

- [SLURPS.]

[CONRAD.]
Yo, I'm gonna
go wash the clams.

- Did you get the lighter fluid?
- Mm.

- Yeah, it's already on the beach.

- [WHISTLES.]

Mm.

Are we done with the portrait yet?
Yeah, for today.

But you do look good in
a dress shirt, Steven.

Uh, which makes me think
if Belly doesn't hurry up and ask Cam
to that ball, you should take her.

Ew.
No way.

No, no, no, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm already going with Shayla.

To the debutante ball?
Yes.

As an escort?
Wrap your head around
it, Mom, all right?
Shayla's coming today
with Nicole and Gigi,
so you'll meet her.

That's wonderful.

Oh, and don't forget, Ms.

Covington's first dance
rehearsal is tomorrow,
so, uh, tick-tock.

I'm asking Cam today.

I don't know my kids anymore.

Wait, are you wearing makeup?
- Yeah, she's wearing makeup.

- Oh, my She definitely is.

- Ooh!
- Mom!
- So what? We're having a party.

- Mm-hmm.

I'm sure it has nothing to do with John
- coming to the clam bake?
- Oh, please.

The husbands always come for the Fourth.

He's not your husband anymore.

Oops.
Yeah.
[CHUCKLES.]
Ex-husband.

You know, I still don't understand
why you invited Dad's girlfriend.

Her name is Victoria,
and your father wanted
us all to meet her.

Oh, Belly, I need you
to make up the guest bed.

Wait, Dad and Victoria are staying here?
In the room next to mine?
Yeah.

- [GROANS.]

- [CHUCKLES.]

Oh, speaking of dads, yours called.

He's closing a deal, so
- he can't come.

- What?
[DOOR CLOSES.]

- Did you say Dad's not coming?
- Mm-hmm.

But I got some serious
fireworks for the show this year.

We'll take a video.

It's not the same.

[SUSANNAH.]
I know.

What're you smiling over there for?
No reason.

[SUSANNAH.]
Laurel, will you
come help me move the table?
Be right there.

You got to fold the bottom
sheet at a 45 degree angle
if you want tight corners.

- Yeah, not like that.

- [BELLY LAUGHING.]

Then help me.

- You got to pull this down.

- Okay.

[CLEARS THROAT.]
Like this.
Come here.

[BELLY.]
Is this what it would be like?
If we were older?
- Me and Conrad together?
- See?
[CAROLINE POLACHEK: "SO
HOT YOU'RE HURTING MY FEELINGS".]

Thank you.
[CHUCKLES.]

[SIGHS.]
Don't you think
it's weird that my dad
is staying here with Victoria?
Well, I'm sure they're
not gonna have loud sex.

[SCOFFS.]
That's foul.

Ugh.

And why is my mom letting him bring
- his bitchy girlfriend anyway?
- Hey.

How do you know she's
bitchy? What if she's, like
a really nice person
or something? [LAUGHS.]

[LAUGHS.]

Uh, what if uh, and-and,
like, just hear me out
- she's a bitch.

- [BOTH LAUGHING.]

[LAUGHING.]
Stop.

It's gonna to be fine,
okay? Don't worry about it.

[CAR HORN HONKS.]

I'm sorry your dad's not coming.

Don't be.
I'm not.

[LAUREL.]
Belly.

[WHISPERS.]
The bitch is here.

It's hurting my feelings ♪
I get a little lonely ♪
Get a little more close to me ♪
You're the only one
who knows me, babe ♪
So hot, you're hurting my feelings
I was kind of hoping for
a vapid ditz in Lululemons.

- Stereotypical midlife crisis?
- Yeah, that.

- You have a much better ass.

- [SLAPS BUTT.]

- [CHUCKLES.]

- You made it.

- Yes.

- [LAUREL.]
How was the trip?
I forgot how crazy it gets
here around the Fourth.

We almost hit a guy in a Segway
with, uh, red, white,
and blue body paint.

[CHUCKLES.]

- Oh, this is, uh
- Victoria.
Hi.

Thank you so much for having me.

I'm such a big fan of your work.

[LAUREL.]
Thanks.
[CHUCKLES.]

She's hot.

- [STEVEN.]
Dude.

- [JEREMIAH.]
What?
I'm just saying what
everyone else is thinking.

I wasn't thinking that.

Yo, that could be their future stepmom.

- [STEVEN.]
Dude, what the hell?
- Don't push me.

Guys, they're coming,
they're coming.
Ah!
Go, go, go, go, go.

- [STEVEN.]
Hey.

- [BELLY CHUCKLES.]

[WHISPERS.]
Be nice.

Hey.

Come give your old man a hug, huh?
- Dad!
- Hey, Dad.

Oh, my gosh! Um
This is Victoria.

Hi, guys.
It's-it's
really great to meet you.

I've heard nothing
but five-star reviews.

- Here, let's put this in the kitchen.

- Okay.

There is no way she's 27.

We have to grab her wallet and check
- her ID.

- She's in grad school.
Chill.

I can't chill.
I mean,
knock-off Dakota Johnson
- has her claws in our dad.

- Yeah.

Oh, my goodness.
This is the most
beautiful kitchen that I've ever seen.

- Thank you.

- Thanks.

Steven, can you get your dad's bags
and put them upstairs, please?
Yeah, I-I just need your
keys to pop the trunk, then.

Actually, Vick and I decided
to stay in town this weekend.

Figured you guys had a packed house.

- Oh, that sounds fun.

- Oh, yeah.

- Well, are you sure?
- Whatever you think is best.

So I convinced John
to stop at a fruit
stand on the way over,
and I figured I could
make some pomegranate
- margaritas later.

- Oh, how thoughtful of you.

[DOORBELL RINGS.]

Oh, I'll get it.

I Shayla
here.

The debs have arrived.

[FRANCIS ON MY MIND: "SWIMMING POOLS".]

Every day is summer ♪
Summer ♪
We're still burning up ♪
When the sun goes down ♪
Oh, you make me ♪
Wonder, wonder ♪
How I'm gonna live when you're not
And then we do Hayley Kiyoko next.

She's super vibey.
You would love her.

Love.
Do you listen to SZA?
I'm kind of offended you
felt the need to ask me that.

Okay.
Of course.
What
else do you have on there?
I can't stop smelling you.

- Okay, well, it's Le Labo.

- Mmm.

Well, I "le lab" it.

- [BOTH LAUGH.]

- You "le lab" it?
- [BOTH LAUGH.]

- That's what my family does, too.

Oh, really? Do you know
what you're gonna be?
Oh, yeah?
My dad runs a hedge
fund.
I'm not really sure
what he does much more than that,
but, growing up, I always
thought he worked on bushes.

I still think that.
[LAUGHS.]

And what does your mom do?
Mom.
Come on, stop interrogating her.

[SHAYLA.]
It's all right.

She's at a wellness retreat
in Arizona until August.
Code for
"I need to get away from
my family for a bit.
"
[GIGI.]
Shayla.
You have to
read this text.
Come here.

Duty calls,
but it was so nice to
meet the both of you.

You have really raised
an incredible son.

He's extremely respectful.

- [LAUREL.]
Thank you.

- See you later.

Can't stay in the shallow, shallow
What a rad girl, Steven.

[STEVEN.]
Ugh, don't say "rad," Dad.

- D-Don't No, don't say that.

- No, I'm a rad dad.

I like her.
She's
confident, knows who she is.

I'm surprised a girl like
that would want to deb.

And I'm never coming out
[JOHN.]
Is there a place
around here I can rent a tux
for you?
- Um
- [SHALYA.]
Steven, come here.

No.
No, no, no.
I-I've
got it covered, Dad.

Thank you.

Yeah.

So, tell me about this deb ball.

Yeah, so, um, apparently,
it's for girls like me.

Girls who, uh, don't know who they are.

Belly, I didn't mean it like that.

[VICTORIA.]
You know,
actually, my cousin did it
in Chicago and they raised a
ton of money for public schools.

Great.

Yeah.
Uh, Belly,
would you mind showing me
where I can find a bathroom?
Sure.

So I'm diving right into you
[JOHN.]
Victoria really did
read your book, you know?
I'm surprised she didn't run
screaming by the end of it.

I'm a novelist, John.
I write fiction.

Tell that to Victoria.

But how late can she stay?
Wouldn't want her parents getting upset.

- Okay.

- She can drink, right?
I'd hate for those pomegranates
- to go to waste.

- Okay.

- No, I understand.

- [LAUGHS.]

God, I missed this.

All of us together again
for a good old Fisher Fourth.

[EXHALES.]
Almost everyone.

So Adam couldn't make it, huh?
Apparently not.

- That's dope.

- [LAUGHS SOFTLY.]

How'd you learn to make these?
So I actually spent a
summer in this desert town
in Texas near the border called Marfa.

And there was a bar
there that served these,
and I told the bartender
that I would not leave
until he showed me
exactly how he made these.

[CHUCKLES.]

Can I try a sip?
Are your parents cool with that?
- Yeah, yeah, no, they don't care.

- Oh, then, sure.

I'm gonna take this out to your dad.

Do you mind taking those
out to Susannah and your mom?
- Yeah, sure.

- Thanks, love.

Oh, well, how is it? Strong? [CHUCKLES.]

- [LAUGHS.]
That is amazing.
Yeah.

- Is it?
Mmm.
No wonder you like it.

- It tastes just like a Slurpee.

- Yeah, exactly.

- But I have an idea.

- Oh, no.

Sous-chef, I'm gonna need
some more pomegranate juice.

[JEREMIAH.]
You got it.

What are you guys making?
Pomegranate margaritas,
but with a twist.

Well, you got to use the good blender.

Oh, I-I haven't used that thing
since the great
Kool-Aid debacle of 2011.

[LAUGHS.]
I remember, the
counters were sticky for
- two summers?
- [LAUGHS.]
Yeah.
Just about.

Dad kept his, uh, briefcase
in my room for a year.

"As a reminder that all
mistakes are not reversible.
"
Wait, won't he be mad if he finds out?
Well, he's not gonna
find out.
He's not coming.

- [LAUGHS.]
Okay.

- Yeah.

Yeah.

[CONRAD.]
Thank you, sir.

Oh, she's going for the good stuff.

Yeah
We don't need another debacle.

- Yeah.

- Stop it, stop.

- No, stop.

- A lot more, a lot more tequila.

No, no, no, no, no!
[CHUCKLES.]

No, keep your hands on it.

Keep your hands on it.
[CHUCKLES.]

Man, you know what I miss?
Huh?
Watching Laurel put Dad in his place.

You know, she'd walk in,
she'd be like, "Adam.
"
[LAUREL.]
Adam.

You came.

- Happy Fourth.

- [JEREMIAH.]
Dad!
- [LAUGHS.]
You came.

- Hey.

Hey, guys.
Hey, Connie.

I'll have a little of what
you're mixing up there.

- Ooh.

- Yeah, sure.

- Hey, thanks, Belly.

- Oh, you're gonna love
the firework show this year.

It's gonna be the best one yet.

I believe it.
[CHUCKLES.]

[SUSANNAH.]
Where'd everyone go?
[ADAM.]
Hey.

Adam.

You managed to get off work.

Yeah, couldn't miss the
Fourth with my family.

[CHUCKLES.]

All right, well, let's
get back to the party.

Okay, let's go, kids.

All right.

Hey, Connie, can I talk
to you for a minute?
[CONRAD.]
I'm gonna head to the beach.

How you feeling, Suz?
Listen, a friend of
mine at Sloan Kettering
said they're starting an
experimental trial soon after
What are you doing here, Adam?
Laurel called me this morning,
said, "Get your ass here," so I'm here.

She shouldn't have done that.

You didn't know.

No, I didn't.

Well, I thought you'd changed your mind.

Well, since it's done, we, um,
we just need to get through it.

Jere's really excited to
show you his fireworks.

I'm not ruining the Fourth for the boys.

[DOOR OPENS.]

- Hot pink?
- Oh
Or if
May I present
- The Belly Special?
- [WHOOPING.]

- Ooh, very nice.

- Those look awesome.

- [CHUCKLES.]

- [GIGI.]
Uh,
we saved you the inflatable unicorn.

Well, thank you.

- You want some?
- Yeah.

[BELLY.]
Very cute.

Hey, guys.

Hey.
Check out who I found.

- It's Cam Cameron.

- [ALL.]
Cam!
Oh, I'm good, man.

Thank you, I don't drink.

Yes, that's right.
More for me.

That's fine.

- Cool
- Hey, soul buddy.

- Hey, Jere.

- Hey, Shayla.

- What's up, Gigi?
- [CAM.]
Hi, there.

[BELLY.]
Hi.

- What's up?
- Um
- What is that?
- It's
a pomegranate margarita.

It's not a race, Con.

Yeah, save some for
the rest of us, please.

[LAUGHS.]

[BELLY.]
Okay, wait, wait,
wait.
But what if it was a race?
I mean, isn't that isn't
Isn't that the premise of,
like, every drinking game?
You want to play a drinking game?
Why not? I mean, it's
the Fourth of July, right?
- Fuck it.

- Let's do it.

[ALL CHEER.]

[JEREMIAH.]
Oh, I got it!
Drink!
[LAUGHTER.]

Just a little little, we were young
- [GIGI.]
Jeremiah, drink.

- [JEREMIAH.]
No!
- Shayla.
Drink up.

- What?
Chug that.

Oh, hey.
Gigi, drink.

- [WHOOPS.]

- [SHAYLA.]
She was going in there.

Snakes and ladders ♪
Climbing up for days ♪
We're invincible, we said
Drink.

[STEVEN.]
Oh, drink!
[SHAYLA.]
What?
- [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]

- Oh, my God,
why am I so bad at this?
Ah!
Yay! Here you go.

Wait, wait, wait.
That's a new
- Oh
- [WHOOPING.]

- Yes.

- Oh
[LAUGHTER.]

- Come on.

- [CHUCKLES.]

No way Oh!
[CAM.]
That's a shame.

Next time Oh!
[LAUGHTER.]

- We killed it.
Isn't it
- We killed it.

- You did.

- Come on.

Thinking about everybody
[CAM.]
Oh, let's go.

- That's my boy.

- That's one.

That's pretty good.
That's pretty good.

[CAM.]
What was that?
- Maybe next time.

- Come on, Steven.

Let's go! Oh, my God!
[BOTH LAUGH.]

- [STEVEN.]
Oh, yeah!
- What happened?
[FADES.]
Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!
'Cause if they
haven't caught you yet
- You are so good at games.

- Yeah, I know you're kidding.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER.]

[GIGI.]
Oh, okay, but did
you know that she was one
of the last people to visit
Lindsay Lohan's beach club
in Mykonos before it closed?
- Are you serious?
- Mm-hmm.

Oh, my God, I'd die for Lindsay.

Ugh, she's a queen.

[NICOLE.]
Ibiza is superior, though.

[SHAYLA.]
As if.

- [NICOLE.]
You don't agree?
- No.

- Back me up.

- [JEREMIAH.]
Hey, Connie, catch.

- Yes, no, I Yes, I agree.

- He's lost.

"Yes, no, yes, no, I agree.
"
- [SHAYLA.]
Shut up.

- Doesn't know what he's talking about.

[SHAYLA.]
He knows what he's
talking about.
He's on my side.

[VOICES FADING.]


- [VAMPIRE WEEKEND: "THIS LIFE".]

- Baby, I know love ♪
Isn't what I thought it was ♪
'Cause I've never known
a love like this before ya
[SIGHS.]

- Here, let me help.

- [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]

- What is wrong with
- I don't need it.

Baby, I know dreams ♪
Tend to crumble at extremes
All right, here it comes.

Oh, easy with the velocity, Tom Brady.

Ho, hoo.

Interception.
[CHUCKLES.]

Go deep.

Your spiral's looking pretty tight.

- Must be in the genes.

- Touchdown, Patriots.

Oh, hey.
I talked to
Coach Walsh from Brown.

He says there's a spot on
summer sessions waiting for you.

- I'm good here.

- [JEREMIAH.]
Hey, Dad.

Uh, we're lighting that big
firework you got in Mexico,
the one that, uh,
makes the big palm tree.

- It's gonna be awesome.

- Can't wait.

Just don't aim it near
the house, all right?
Hey, come here, I want to
show you how to run a post.

Yeah, we got to go dig the clam pit.

Oh.
I'll come help.

Why don't you go spend
some time with Mom?
[NICOLE.]
I don't get Conrad.

It's, like, one minute he's all over me,
and he stays over, but then
we don't even fuck, right?
And then this morning,
he's, like, super into me,
he's all over me, and now
he's like, "Oh, football.
"
Yeah, no, he's really
hard to read sometimes.

- [LAUGHS.]
Like all the time.

- Yeah.

Do you really think he likes me?
Yeah.
Yeah, totally.

I mean, he talks about you a lot.

- Really?
- Yeah.
Mm-hmm.

[CAM.]
Hi.

You may want to hydrate.
Water.

Cam Cameron, you are so
sweet.
Isn't he sweet?
- [CAM CHUCKLES.]

- Mm-hmm.

- [GIGGLES.]

- Uh, do you want to go
for a walk on the beach?
Belly, by the way, I love that dress.

Really? Thanks, I Taylor
got it for me, actually.

Mm, Taylor has great taste.

[BELLY.]
Yeah, I know, right?
She totally does.
Oh, my God.

You know what?
You and Taylor are, like, twins.

Because you're both mega-fashiony.

- It's true.
It's true.

- And you're both, like
- baddies, wouldn't you Baddies.

- [LAUGHTER.]

And you both like the same
summer boys, which is
- [CHUCKLES.]
We do?
- [CAM.]
Come on.

- Let's go for that walk.

- [BELLY.]
No, no, no, Cam.

- Yeah.

- I'm talking.
One sec.

Look, Shayla, like, don't worry,
because my brother is an idiot.

And it didn't mean anything.

It didn't mean anything.

- [CAM.]
Let's go for that walk.

- Wait, what didn't mean anything?
Uh, them-them kissing.

- [CAM.]
Hey
- It was like He-he, like, loves you.

He loves you.
And Wait,
does anyone want another drink?
I want another drink.

[JEREMIAH.]
Hey.

Can you be nice to Dad for one day?
Seriously, he's trying.

Good for him.

Whatever you have with
Dad, squash it, all right?
Please.

[EXHALES.]

Yeah, it's mostly a work summer.

I mean, Princeton is pretty expensive.

And t-that's if I get in, so
You will.
You got hustle like I did.

Hey, have you found the card room?
At the club.

It's off the men's locker room.

Most days, there's a
high-stakes poker game in there.

Private bar, dedicated server.

And big tips?
When the game's rolling,
we hand out Benjamins.

[LAUGHS.]

I'll put in a call, see what I can do.

Thank you.

- You should.
They're really
- [CAM.]
Yeah?
Would be cool.
[CHUCKLES.]

Wait, Cam, everyone's leaving.

Tell them, tell them not to go.

- [LAUGHS.]
Tell them not to leave.

- Stay, you guys.

Uh, Shayla doesn't feel good.

I think we had a little too much.

Oh O-Okay, yeah.
Well, I'm
I mean, I still feel
I feel gr great.

You know what?
Let's do this again tomorrow.

- Let's do it again tomorrow.

- Okay.

Yeah.

- Bye.

- Okay.

- Bye.
Right?
- Belly.

- Uh
- I'm actually gonna take off, too.

- Why?
- I just think we can catch up
when you're a little less
- A little less?
- Um, just drink water.

- Okay.
But I'm not, I'm not drunk.

- Drink a lot of water.
Yeah.

- I'm not drunk.
I'm
- Water would be good.

- Call you tomorrow.

- I'm not Okay.

Hmm.

[LAUGHS.]
Hello, sea creature.

Hello.
Ooh.

Hey.
[CHUCKLES.]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER.]

Hey.

Hey, w-whoa.
Are you guys leaving?
Our Uber's here.

Your Uber's here?
- Just give me a minute.

- Are you sure?
Yeah, it's fine.

Can I come with?
It's cool, we don't, like,
have to do everything together.

It's not like we're a "thing.
"
I mean, I was busy in
New York last weekend,
and you were hanging out
with Taylor at Nicole's party.

Taylor? No.

No, no, no, no.
S-She's
just Belly's best friend.

I know you guys hooked up.

Sh Shayla, that doesn't
That really doesn't mean anything.

Look, she doesn't mean
anything.
It's not
You can relax.
I mean, it's
not like we're exclusive.

Debs aren't even supposed
to date their escorts.

We're just having fun, right?
Nothing serious.

Yeah.

Yeah, no, w-we're just, uh, having fun.

Yeah.

I'm glad we're on the same page.

I'll, uh, I'll see you later.

[ENGINE STARTS.]

- [CAR DOOR CLOSES.]

- [SIGHS.]

[ADAM.]
Laurel, what the hell?
[LAUREL.]
Just get in here.

What's going on with you and Beck?
This is all your fault.

You shouldn't have called me like that.

Not without asking her.

Your wife is dying of cancer
and you can't make it
to her favorite holiday?
I'm staying away because she told me to.

I thought you knew that.

Why doesn't she want you around?
- What did you do?
- I fucked up.

Just like you knew I would.

[DOOR OPENS.]

[SHOWER RUNNING.]


Oh, sea creature
Where are you?
Uh, I'm in the shower.

[CHUCKLES.]

Everybody left.

But we still got margaritas to drink.

Okay, well, I can't
drink it in the shower.

Can you just put it down
and I'll get it after?
- Can I shower?
- [LAUGHS SOFTLY.]

[BELLY.]
I've always
liked you with wet hair.

It's so romantic.
[LAUGHS SOFTLY.]

What's so romantic about wet hair?
[EXHALES.]

You just don't get it.

[SCOFFS.]

How many of those have you had?
Two, five.
It's
- [CHUCKLES.]

- It's not important.

Let me just ask you one thing, okay?
Did you buy me that infinity
necklace for my birthday?
[LAUGHS.]

I knew it.

- I knew I was right.

- Can I please
Can you give me some privacy, please?
[BELLY.]
I knew it.
I knew it.

[SCOFFS.]
Who said you
could have a margarita?
Um, Victoria?
[DOOR CLOSES.]

Cake time.
[GIGGLES.]

[LAUGHS SOFTLY.]

What? It's cake time.

- [EXHALES.]

- [LAUGHS.]

Where'd all the kids go?
Uh, more for us.

That's the spirit, John,
my eternal optimist.

Ooh, I want the piece
with the strawberries!
- Belly, are you okay?
- [ADAM.]
Honey, are you okay?
[BELLY.]
Ow.

- Here, let me help you up.

- [SUSANNAH.]
Adam, I'm fine.

- Come on.
Please.

- I got it.
I got it, stop it.

God, just go away.

[GRUNTS SOFTLY.]

I-I'm sorry.

[SUSANNAH GRUNTS.]

- Mom?
- I'll deal with you later.

Let's check on Belly.

Come on.
Let's go.

- Dad?
- Yeah, sweetie?
- There you go.

- I think Victoria's really cool.

That's great, sweetie.

I'm sorry about your
grandmother's cake stand.

Whatever.

Well, I see you're
not wearing your ring.

Want to tell me what the hell
is going on with you and Adam?
I'm sorry, but how
was I supposed to know
the two of you weren't getting along?
We should get back to the party.

No, we're not leaving this room
until you tell me what's going on.

[SIGHS.]

He cheated on me three
years ago with his secretary.

What?
While I was going through chemo.

Are you
- [EXHALES.]

- So '80s, right?
Then again, Adam never
was very creative.

Wait.

Why didn't you tell me?
Because you would've
told me to leave him
and I didn't want to and now I do.

Why now?
I don't want him next to me at the end.

- I'm gonna kill him.

- Laurel, I've handled it.

By the time we get
back, he'll be moved out.

Uh
Hold on.
Y-Y
Slow down a second.

Adam's a dick, but
you're gonna need him.

- The boys are gonna need him.

- We will be fine without him.

Okay, but clearly you aren't.

You always think you know so
much better than everyone else.

Just-just stop trying to manage my life.

If I don't, who will?
Beck, you're not thinking this through.

Who's gonna drive you
to your appointments,
who's gonna make sure the boys
are eating and going to school?
Look, I am doing my best, okay?
So just stop pressuring me.

You know I'm gonna be the one
who has to clean all this up.

Well, nothing will make you happier.

Fuck you.

How is she?
She's good.

Are you good?
No.

Think fast.

- Jesus.

- Ready?
[DR.
DOG: "WHERE'D ALL THE TIME GO?".]

- Why is your aim so bad?
- Hey, listen,
it's not my fault you
can't hold a garbage bag.

- [STEVEN.]
All right.

- [CONRAD.]
Hey, Dumb and Dumber,
can you guys go set up the fireworks?
- I'll clean up.

- Yeah.
Sure.

Let's go.
Come on.

Goodbye
Come on.

[DOOR OPENS.]

- [DOOR CLOSES.]

- You know I get so forgetful ♪
When I look in your eyes ♪
Now she's walking backwards
Hey, Dad.

Oh.
Hey.

Did you get everything cleaned up?
Yeah, and Belly's upstairs with her dad.

Why'd you let her get so drunk?
You're lucky she and
your mom didn't get hurt.

I didn't know she was
drinking that much.

You're the oldest.

You're supposed to look
out for the younger kids.

I don't know why, but I
thought I could talk to you.

Hey, hold Connie,
hold on.
I'm sorry, man.

I got a lot going on right now.

[CONRAD.]
Just leave, Dad.

[SIGHS.]

[SQUEALING, POPPING.]

[JEREMIAH.]
[WHOOPING.]

Yeah! That was awesome!
[SCOFFS.]
Come on.
That
was your best one yet.

What's wrong?
Shayla knows about Taylor.

Oh, shit.

[STEVEN.]
That's the thing, man.

Like, Shayla didn't even seem mad.

I don't I don't know,
she didn't even seem to care.

She said we weren't
anything serious anyways.

[SCOFFS.]
And you bought that?
Dude, she was wanting you to
say you wanted to be exclusive.

- What? No.

- Yes, dummy.

- No.
No, no, no, no.

- Yes.
I know how these things work.

- Oh, fuck.

- [LAUGHS.]

Dude, I don't know, man.

I'm just I am just crazy about her.

I swear, I've just never felt
this way about anyone else.

Well, quit your fucking
moping and go tell her.

Give me some.
Come on.

[KNOCKING.]

- [BELLY SIGHS.]

- [DOOR SQUEAKS OPEN.]

- Yeah.

- Hey, there.

How's my little Bean?
Bean is broken.
Ow.

Oh, my head.

[BELLY SIGHS.]

Oh, is Susannah really mad at me?
She could never be mad at you.

[SIGHS.]
Well, Mom probably is.

She'd be one to talk.

I remember one July Fourth
when Susannah rented
a margarita machine.

- [WHISTLES, LAUGHS SOFTLY.]

- [LAUGHS SOFTLY.]

Here.
This helped.

Trust me, the bread and
grease are your friends.

Mm.

I can't really picture Mom drunk.

Well, didn't happen
often, but when it did,
look out.

[BOTH LAUGH SOFTLY.]

Do you still love her?
Um, I think
I'll always be a little
bit in love with Laurel.

But, um, she stopped
being in love with you?
It's not that simple.
Um
sometimes people change.

They grow in different directions.

It doesn't mean they
stop loving each other.

Where is Mom?
She left.
I think she and
Susannah had some kind of fight.

- What?
- Don't worry.

They'll work it out.
They always do.

Come on.

[BELLY SIGHS.]

- [SOFT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYS.]

- [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]

Gin martini, very cold.

Thank you.

[SIGHS.]

Hemingway would approve.

He used to freeze water
in tennis ball cans
and put them in the martini pitcher
so his martini was ice cold.

- Dad?
- Hey, kid.

- Are you leaving already?
- Yeah, uh,
Barclay deal's falling apart.

Got to get the next flight
back to London tomorrow.

It's Fourth of July weekend.

Yeah, the Brits don't really consider
our independence a holiday, so
I thought you were going to
teach me some curl routes.

Promise, all right?
After I close this deal.

And we got to talk varsity
football for next year.

Oh, I'm not that good,
Dad.
I'm not Conrad.

You're faster than he ever was.

All right, love you, son.

I love you, too, Dad.

All right, see ya.

[DOOR OPENS, DOOR CLOSES.]

[TV PLAYING INSIDE.]

Hi.
Uh
What's up?
Look, can we revisit,
you know, that whole thing
about you and me being casual?
Sure.

Uh, can I sit?
Yeah, go ahead.

All right.
Um
So, look, I-I fucked up before.

Uh, uh, no.
Actually twice.

First, when I hooked up with Taylor
w-which was the dumbest
thing I've ever done, okay?
And then and then
earlier today, when you said
we weren't anything serious,
and I agreed with you.

I-I didn't I don't know.

I didn't mean that shit.

Then why did you say it?
Because I choked.
I
Look, I'm sorry.
All right? I-I'm sorry.

You just make me so nervous.

- Why?
- Why? W
Because you are you.

I don't I don't want
to be with anybody else.

All right?
I mean, do you?
No.

When we went out with my first novel
Mm-hmm.

- everyone said, "Aah! There is"
- [LAUGHS.]

"There is no market for a book
about a Filipino main character.
"
And now, it's all they
want from me, you know?
[LAUGHING.]
Oh, my God, yes, completely.

Right?
But at least they want
something from you.

- Well
- Excuse me.

I wouldn't be surprised
if my publisher passed on my next book.

Yeah.

I mean, not that I even have
a next book to give them.

Oh, no.
I hear you, you know?
The book that I'm working on
right now, it's kicking my ass.

You know, I sit there all day,
and I just stare at my computer.

[BOTH LAUGH.]

[CLEVELAND.]
Ah, the life of a writer.

[CLEVELAND CHUCKLES.]

Hey, do you want to get out of here?
Where to?
[BOTH PANTING AND MOANING.]

- Hi.

- Jesus.

What are you doing?
I'm just having some cereal
before I go for a swim.

Where were you?
[SIGHS.]
Just went for a drive.

[CABINET DOOR CLOSES.]

Aren't you going to yell at me?
Do you want me to yell at you?
No.

what I want is to go back in time
so that I didn't barge in
on Conrad in the shower.

Was he naked?
No, he was wearing a bathing suit.

Ugh.
But I did tell him
that he looks very
romantic with wet hair.

[CHUCKLES.]

I hope Cam wasn't there for that.

Thank God, no.

Oh, but he's probably mad at me, too.

- I'm never drinking again.

- I'm gonna make hangover soup.

You can have it for breakfast.

I don't know if I feel
I feel like
fireworks with Cam.

Did you feel them with Dad,
at least in the beginning?
What I felt for your dad was steady.

It was like a cozy campfire
that would keep me warm
all through the night.

But that wasn't enough?
I guess not.

Have you ever felt
fireworks for anybody?
Once, but it was never
going to work out.

The fire would've burned us both alive.

But it it didn't work
out with Dad, either,
so how-how do you know
when it's the right person?
You'll know when you want to be
with that person no matter what.

Too hot, too safe you won't care.

It'll just feel right.

Hmm.

Um, your bow is untied.

- Ooh.
Um
- [LAUGHS.]

Love you, Mom.

Love you, too, Bean.

[FIREWORKS SQUEALING AND POPPING.]

[SIGHS.]

So does everyone hate me now?
Who could ever hate you?
[LAUGHS.]
So I think
my mom just got railed.

What?! By who?
I don't know.
[LAUGHS.]

Wow.
Go, Laurel.

[BELLY LAUGHS.]

[FIREWORKS SQUEAL, POP.]

[TAYLOR SWIFT: "FALSE GOD".]

Hey
Belly, about the necklace
- Um, I'm sorry I brought it up.

- No, no.

I, um I did get it for you.

Then why didn't you give it to me?
I don't know.

I got embarrassed, I guess.

Why?
Hey
Belly, you don't know the
effect you have on people.

Effect on people? I don't
I don't know what you're talking about.

Yeah.

You do.

You can't talk to
me when I'm like this ♪
Daring you to leave me just
so I can try and scare you ♪
You're the West Village ♪
You still do it for me ♪
They all warned us
about times like this ♪
[BELLY.]
Huh?
They say the road gets
hard and you get lost ♪
When you're led by blind faith ♪
Blind faith ♪
[FIREWORKS SQUEALING AND POPPING.]

We might just get away with it ♪
- Religion's in your lips ♪
- [BELLY SIGHS.]

Even if it's a false god ♪
We'd still worship ♪
We might just ♪
- Get away with it ♪
- [SIGHS.]

The altar is my hips ♪
Even if it's a false god ♪
We'd still worship this love ♪
We'd still worship this love ♪
We'd still worship this love ♪
Uh ♪
Still worship this love ♪
Even if it's a false god ♪
Even if it's a false god ♪
Still worship this ♪
Love ♪
We were crazy to think ♪
Crazy to think that this could work ♪
Remember how I said I'd die for you? ♪
Hey ♪
We were stupid to jump ♪
In the ocean separating us ♪
Remember how I'd fly to you? ♪
Hey ♪
And I can't talk to you
when you're like this ♪
Staring out the window like
I'm not your favorite town ♪
I'm New York City ♪
Hey ♪
I still do it for you, babe ♪
They all warned us
about times like this ♪
They say the road gets hard ♪
And you get lost when
you're led by blind faith ♪
Blind faith ♪
But we might just get away with it ♪
Religion's in your lips ♪
Even if it's a false god ♪
We'd still worship ♪
We might just get away with it ♪
The altar is my hips ♪
Even if it's a false god ♪
We'd still worship this love ♪
We'd still worship this love ♪
We'd still worship this love ♪
Hey ♪
Ah ♪♪
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