Will and Grace s04e10 Episode Script
Stakin' Care of Business
What are we doing? Are we even working out? Of course we are Just because we're not sweating doesn't mean we're not getting a good workout Just the kind of answer I'd expect from the owner of an Angela Lansbury workout video Ready? Flip My ball smells Smell my ball Smell your own ball! Well, if I could do that I'd be the happiest girl on earth I don't know what that means Hey, losers how you doing? Come on Up, up, up We're here to work out Let's go Let's stake it! Let's what? Stake it! You gotta stake it Stop saying "stake it" What's stake it? "Stake it" is my workout catch-phrase and in addition to being a motivational tool it is also a stylistic flourish that sets me apart It doesn't even mean anything Ok You two figure this out I'm gonna go work on my glutes Meaning you're gonna go sit at the juice bar? Yep You can laugh at "stake it" now but when it becomes my "dyn-o-mite" or my "leggo my eggo" or my "hey, hey, hey" Then you'll be laughing,because Wait.
What Who's that guy? That guy? Um, I don't know He's that guy You know what's his name Generic McPlain Wrap No, I know him I just I mean not from the gym from someplace else Oh, who cares, Will? Probably from some law case where you said 'blah' and he said 'blah' and a judge said 'blah' and ten people died of boredom No I could swear I I'm done I know how I know him Àª & ±×·¹À̽º ´ëº»:Gtv ³×ÀÌÆ® µå ó¸ 24 Ŭ·´ Will & Grace ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ You slept with that guy? No! We just fooled around - But he's a six - He's a seven - He's a five - He's a six Sold! It was just one time you know I had just broken up with Michael He was my rebound guy Remember I met him at the Cuddle Bum? That's Cuddle Bum?! God, I was so awful to him You know he kept calling and calling and I just blew him off Wait Tell me that story again How does it go?Tell me again No Forget it Fine, then I'll tell Cuddle Bum you're here It was winter He didn't have any heat in his apartment We were lying there and he said "Will, I'm cold.
Would you.
" "Cuddle me bum?" "Cuddle me bum!" Cuddle Bum! Oh, that's rich! Oh, it's good to laugh again! So, Cuddle Bum's in the gym What are you gonna do? Everything's tainted That fridge a derriere has been on every piece of equipment in this place I'm not gonna do anything All right? I-I'm a grownup He's a grownup If we run into each other we'll just act like grownups Excuse me Don't I know you? No I don't think so Come on.
Let's go Ok, I just gave a homeless guy a quarter and now I'm pretty sure it was Johnny Depp Karen, can you call the maintenance guy and tell him the door keeps sticking I hate having to reset it every time No Honey, I'm watching these burly movers clear out the office next door They're moving out? I've always wanted that space Have they rented it yet? Is it still available? I don't know You move that desk, bitch! Stop that! You work in an office Conduct yourself with a little dig that fine ass Hey, sweet-cheeks Do fries go with that shake? You like? What?! How dare you?That was offensive! Filthy pig! I cannot believe they're moving out I always promised myself that if that space ever opened up I would rent it break through that wall and expand my business Oh, honey You have a dream You know I have a dream, too To be rich and beautiful and have a great body Oh, look My dream came true I just wish this weren't happening right now when I'm so low on cash God why did I give Johnny Depp that quarter? Well, Grace Why don't you just ask me for the money? I mean, come on I'd give you the loan in a second Really? Are you sure? Of course I'm sure, honey All you have to do is ask Ok Karen, would you loan me the money? Well, I'll have to see a presentation What? Grace, I don't know what your business is I don't know what you do I mean For all I know, you could be using the money to buy Ms Pac-Man machines and pizza ovens Karen, this isn't Chuck E Cheese You know that I'm a designer All I know is there's a pizza here every day at noon I'm not gonna pitch myself to you It's insulting I would rather try and get a loan from a bank All right Well suit yourself Never gonna happen You know what? I am gonna get that loan And not just because I'm a smart successful businesswoman who's run her own design firm for five years but also because I'll be wearing something see-through? Here's my loan application some information about the business and my profit and loss statements for the past five years I think you'll be very impressed I know that I am Monday morning good for the presentation? I'll see you at the crack of noon and wear something sheer Oh, heySorry Are you gonna use the 30s? Actually, I was gonna use 35 Oh, doesn't matter anyway 'cause I was gonna use the 40s Who am I kidding? I was gonna use the 30s Thank God, 'cause I'm going for the 15s -I'm Curt -I'm Will I'd shake your hand but it looks kind of heavy Ooh, yeah! Oh, sorry Just a little thing I do to keep me going Really? "Ooh, yeah" Where'd you pick that up? The remainders bin at Lame Phrases 'R' Us? I know It's not great but I haven't found anything that works as good Oh, my god This is total serendipity-doo I have just the phrase you're looking for Yeah?/Yeah Whenever you need that extra burst of energy all you have to say is -Stake it -Exactly What?! -Stake it! -Hey, that's my phrase! Hey! So, I'll see you there tonight around 8:00 Great Will.
This is terrible This is horrible Did you see that guy that was just here? We are going out tonight How great is that? Someone has stolen "stake it" I was on the treadmill about to stake it and this personal trainer out of nowhere yells, "stake it!" Do you want to hear about this guy I just met? So I went up to her and I said I said "Excuse me I don't mind you using stake it but you do know that it's my catch phrase" And she said she's been saying "stake it" for years that her sister's ex-boyfriend invented "stake it" in Chicago in 1994 while working in a plastic factory! But how can that be? Ok, Jack I don't know what to say I'm outraged We are not gonna let her get away with this We are gonna slap such a lawsuit on her she won't know what hit her yeah, Thanks, Will Yeah either that or I'll pants you in public Let's go with that Hey, Curt, it's, uh it's me Will again I'm just calling again to, uh, to tell you what a great time I had the other night again Uh, still love to hear from you You got my home number my office, my pager, my cell Uh, I guess that's it Although my CB handle is Big Willie Oh, crap! Hey, buddy I couldn't help overhearing Because I was standing here listening But these incessant phone calls have got to stop I mean, it's been a week Have some dignity Start stalking him Everything's fine He's probably just out of town or you're being blown off That is not possible We had a great time together A guy who is blowing you off does not go off the zone just to share a brioche pudding with you He went "off the zone" for you? God, that line's older than "this is the first time I've ever done this with a man" No I'm telling you he's not blowing me off Hey, come on Let's go ask Marcy She knows all the gossip here I swear she's like a female version of Liz Smith Hey, girl, give me some spritz Anyway, listen, Marcy You know that guy that used to come in here around this time? Is it Curt? Oh, yeah I know Curt Yeah Well, my friend here Will went on a date with him about a week ago Oh, wow, are you the "Nibbler"? I beg your pardon? Well, I heard that the guy Curt went out with liked to nibble Yeah.
That I'm the nibbler He's working out in the afternoon now Did he say why? Maybe he's avoiding you Nibbler Maybe you nibbled off a little more than you can chew Maybe you stop talking like that Maybe you'll tell me what happens if I don't Maybe I tell the management that wasn't a documentary you were shooting in the locker room Maybe I'll stop now So, Mrs Walker there you have it The business plan my mission statement and an essay on why I insist on keeping my hair this way So, in conclusion the Grace Adler Designs expansion project not only will benefit Grace Adler Designs but it will fulfill the dream of your friend Grace Adler Thank you Oh, honey That was a wonderful presentation I mean it Really A-Plus Whew Thanks Kar So, what do you say? -Do I get the loan? -No What? Ok, time for lunch See you tomorrow Oh Darn it It's stuck again Push the reset button Let me out of here What's the problem? I would love to let you out but before I do I think I'm gonna need to see a presentation on why I should Hey, Curt Where ya been? Oh, yeah I've been really busy Yeah? 'Cause it feels like you've been avoiding me No, I haven't been avoiding you Look I gotta go I'll call you No Don't Don't do that Don't lie Not here This is a gym this is gay church Ok, look.
I've sort of been avoiding you To be honest, I just got out of a relationship and, you were kind of my rebound guy So, what? You were using me? Well, I wouldn't call it using you What would you call it? Well, I don't know Sort of a gay catch- and-release program? Sorry See ya Yeah, well, see if I nibble you again! Your neck tastes like vinegar! I'm guessing Will, I just heard what happened between you and Curt That was two seconds ago! She's that good I guess what goes around comes around What are you talking about? Well, Curt blew you off like you blew your guy off Oh, that is totally different He was a six and I'man idiot I'm sorry Are you bummed? Yeah But are you Cuddle-bummed? Come on, Karen I'm listening Why do you deserve to be out in the world among decent people? Because Karen Walker helps people You know I was just a scared single mom working in a factory trying to put food on the table but when I heard about the barbaric conditions in our workplace I knew something had to be done I didn't even care how management was gonna brutalize me No I stood up on that table I rang that bell and I said "Union! Union!" "Union!" Ok, I'm gonna have to stop you That's not you That's Norma Rae Come on, Gracie I know I have my flaws But--you, Grace you'rea kind person I mean, you wouldn't let a little kitty suffer much less a fellow human being, so come on, honey Let me out of here You're right I'm too soft-hearted to watch you suffer so I'm goin' to the movies Later -Mitchell? -Uh, do I know you? Come on It's Will Truman We went out once like four years ago Will Truman I seem to remember an answering machine by that name Look, I just I want to say I'm sorry You know we went out I never called you back Of course I remember you I cuddled your bum Well, why didn't you return my calls? You know, I thought we had a good time I wasn't all that confident to begin with you know, and you made me feel like I was no better than a seven Oh, Mitchell Come on You are not a seven Look I'd just got out of a relationship and I was lonely I didn't think I could handle anything more than one night so I'm sorry Well, better late than never I suppose Will! I got it! Watch Stake it UK! It's brilliant It's British I'm back So, how've you been? Oh, pretty good after you and I had our thing I met someone, and, we've been together ever since Well, ok We broke up for a bit recently but, he had a fling with someone sent him running back to me Oh, good So, happy ending Yeah, Hey.
he's here now Curt, come here I want you to meet someone Wait You and Cuddle Bum? Wait You and The Nibbler? Wait You and Clammy Hands? Clammy Hands?! Hey! Come on you guys Stake it UK! So Have you thought of anything else to Hello? Let go of my hair! Not until you let me out of here! Ok! I will! Psych! I can't believe you fell for that! You know, you can be really mean sometimes You were really mean to me putting me through that whole song and dance for nothing You hurt my feelings I was sparing your feelings Honey I looked over your proposal and I'm sorry but that dog just won't hunt You need to listen to me You know, I'm pretty good in business How do you think I got so rich? You married someone rich! You know nothing about business Oh, yeah? Well, I know thatin today's uncertain economic climate people are taking a long hard look at any purchase that could be considered a luxury item eg, interior design Then, when you factor in the leading economic indicator ie winter housing starts the negligible impact of the recent interest rate cuts decline in occupancy rates in corporate office space it just seems to me that a smaller company Will be better equipped to respond to shifting market forces but I guess you probably already knew that I know where the market is Come on, honey That's why I didn't want to give you the loan It's better you stay small Lean mean and flat But, Kar, why didn't you just say all of this in the first place? Because expanding this pizza parlor was your dream I didn't wanna just poo on that It's better that you just think I didn't give you the money 'cause I'm mean Oh, Karen That's sweet Now, come on Bust my bust outta here Thanks Now, come on Give me a hug Got you! What are you doing? I'm gonna give you a couple of hours to think about what you did to me
What Who's that guy? That guy? Um, I don't know He's that guy You know what's his name Generic McPlain Wrap No, I know him I just I mean not from the gym from someplace else Oh, who cares, Will? Probably from some law case where you said 'blah' and he said 'blah' and a judge said 'blah' and ten people died of boredom No I could swear I I'm done I know how I know him Àª & ±×·¹À̽º ´ëº»:Gtv ³×ÀÌÆ® µå ó¸ 24 Ŭ·´ Will & Grace ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ You slept with that guy? No! We just fooled around - But he's a six - He's a seven - He's a five - He's a six Sold! It was just one time you know I had just broken up with Michael He was my rebound guy Remember I met him at the Cuddle Bum? That's Cuddle Bum?! God, I was so awful to him You know he kept calling and calling and I just blew him off Wait Tell me that story again How does it go?Tell me again No Forget it Fine, then I'll tell Cuddle Bum you're here It was winter He didn't have any heat in his apartment We were lying there and he said "Will, I'm cold.
Would you.
" "Cuddle me bum?" "Cuddle me bum!" Cuddle Bum! Oh, that's rich! Oh, it's good to laugh again! So, Cuddle Bum's in the gym What are you gonna do? Everything's tainted That fridge a derriere has been on every piece of equipment in this place I'm not gonna do anything All right? I-I'm a grownup He's a grownup If we run into each other we'll just act like grownups Excuse me Don't I know you? No I don't think so Come on.
Let's go Ok, I just gave a homeless guy a quarter and now I'm pretty sure it was Johnny Depp Karen, can you call the maintenance guy and tell him the door keeps sticking I hate having to reset it every time No Honey, I'm watching these burly movers clear out the office next door They're moving out? I've always wanted that space Have they rented it yet? Is it still available? I don't know You move that desk, bitch! Stop that! You work in an office Conduct yourself with a little dig that fine ass Hey, sweet-cheeks Do fries go with that shake? You like? What?! How dare you?That was offensive! Filthy pig! I cannot believe they're moving out I always promised myself that if that space ever opened up I would rent it break through that wall and expand my business Oh, honey You have a dream You know I have a dream, too To be rich and beautiful and have a great body Oh, look My dream came true I just wish this weren't happening right now when I'm so low on cash God why did I give Johnny Depp that quarter? Well, Grace Why don't you just ask me for the money? I mean, come on I'd give you the loan in a second Really? Are you sure? Of course I'm sure, honey All you have to do is ask Ok Karen, would you loan me the money? Well, I'll have to see a presentation What? Grace, I don't know what your business is I don't know what you do I mean For all I know, you could be using the money to buy Ms Pac-Man machines and pizza ovens Karen, this isn't Chuck E Cheese You know that I'm a designer All I know is there's a pizza here every day at noon I'm not gonna pitch myself to you It's insulting I would rather try and get a loan from a bank All right Well suit yourself Never gonna happen You know what? I am gonna get that loan And not just because I'm a smart successful businesswoman who's run her own design firm for five years but also because I'll be wearing something see-through? Here's my loan application some information about the business and my profit and loss statements for the past five years I think you'll be very impressed I know that I am Monday morning good for the presentation? I'll see you at the crack of noon and wear something sheer Oh, heySorry Are you gonna use the 30s? Actually, I was gonna use 35 Oh, doesn't matter anyway 'cause I was gonna use the 40s Who am I kidding? I was gonna use the 30s Thank God, 'cause I'm going for the 15s -I'm Curt -I'm Will I'd shake your hand but it looks kind of heavy Ooh, yeah! Oh, sorry Just a little thing I do to keep me going Really? "Ooh, yeah" Where'd you pick that up? The remainders bin at Lame Phrases 'R' Us? I know It's not great but I haven't found anything that works as good Oh, my god This is total serendipity-doo I have just the phrase you're looking for Yeah?/Yeah Whenever you need that extra burst of energy all you have to say is -Stake it -Exactly What?! -Stake it! -Hey, that's my phrase! Hey! So, I'll see you there tonight around 8:00 Great Will.
This is terrible This is horrible Did you see that guy that was just here? We are going out tonight How great is that? Someone has stolen "stake it" I was on the treadmill about to stake it and this personal trainer out of nowhere yells, "stake it!" Do you want to hear about this guy I just met? So I went up to her and I said I said "Excuse me I don't mind you using stake it but you do know that it's my catch phrase" And she said she's been saying "stake it" for years that her sister's ex-boyfriend invented "stake it" in Chicago in 1994 while working in a plastic factory! But how can that be? Ok, Jack I don't know what to say I'm outraged We are not gonna let her get away with this We are gonna slap such a lawsuit on her she won't know what hit her yeah, Thanks, Will Yeah either that or I'll pants you in public Let's go with that Hey, Curt, it's, uh it's me Will again I'm just calling again to, uh, to tell you what a great time I had the other night again Uh, still love to hear from you You got my home number my office, my pager, my cell Uh, I guess that's it Although my CB handle is Big Willie Oh, crap! Hey, buddy I couldn't help overhearing Because I was standing here listening But these incessant phone calls have got to stop I mean, it's been a week Have some dignity Start stalking him Everything's fine He's probably just out of town or you're being blown off That is not possible We had a great time together A guy who is blowing you off does not go off the zone just to share a brioche pudding with you He went "off the zone" for you? God, that line's older than "this is the first time I've ever done this with a man" No I'm telling you he's not blowing me off Hey, come on Let's go ask Marcy She knows all the gossip here I swear she's like a female version of Liz Smith Hey, girl, give me some spritz Anyway, listen, Marcy You know that guy that used to come in here around this time? Is it Curt? Oh, yeah I know Curt Yeah Well, my friend here Will went on a date with him about a week ago Oh, wow, are you the "Nibbler"? I beg your pardon? Well, I heard that the guy Curt went out with liked to nibble Yeah.
That I'm the nibbler He's working out in the afternoon now Did he say why? Maybe he's avoiding you Nibbler Maybe you nibbled off a little more than you can chew Maybe you stop talking like that Maybe you'll tell me what happens if I don't Maybe I tell the management that wasn't a documentary you were shooting in the locker room Maybe I'll stop now So, Mrs Walker there you have it The business plan my mission statement and an essay on why I insist on keeping my hair this way So, in conclusion the Grace Adler Designs expansion project not only will benefit Grace Adler Designs but it will fulfill the dream of your friend Grace Adler Thank you Oh, honey That was a wonderful presentation I mean it Really A-Plus Whew Thanks Kar So, what do you say? -Do I get the loan? -No What? Ok, time for lunch See you tomorrow Oh Darn it It's stuck again Push the reset button Let me out of here What's the problem? I would love to let you out but before I do I think I'm gonna need to see a presentation on why I should Hey, Curt Where ya been? Oh, yeah I've been really busy Yeah? 'Cause it feels like you've been avoiding me No, I haven't been avoiding you Look I gotta go I'll call you No Don't Don't do that Don't lie Not here This is a gym this is gay church Ok, look.
I've sort of been avoiding you To be honest, I just got out of a relationship and, you were kind of my rebound guy So, what? You were using me? Well, I wouldn't call it using you What would you call it? Well, I don't know Sort of a gay catch- and-release program? Sorry See ya Yeah, well, see if I nibble you again! Your neck tastes like vinegar! I'm guessing Will, I just heard what happened between you and Curt That was two seconds ago! She's that good I guess what goes around comes around What are you talking about? Well, Curt blew you off like you blew your guy off Oh, that is totally different He was a six and I'man idiot I'm sorry Are you bummed? Yeah But are you Cuddle-bummed? Come on, Karen I'm listening Why do you deserve to be out in the world among decent people? Because Karen Walker helps people You know I was just a scared single mom working in a factory trying to put food on the table but when I heard about the barbaric conditions in our workplace I knew something had to be done I didn't even care how management was gonna brutalize me No I stood up on that table I rang that bell and I said "Union! Union!" "Union!" Ok, I'm gonna have to stop you That's not you That's Norma Rae Come on, Gracie I know I have my flaws But--you, Grace you'rea kind person I mean, you wouldn't let a little kitty suffer much less a fellow human being, so come on, honey Let me out of here You're right I'm too soft-hearted to watch you suffer so I'm goin' to the movies Later -Mitchell? -Uh, do I know you? Come on It's Will Truman We went out once like four years ago Will Truman I seem to remember an answering machine by that name Look, I just I want to say I'm sorry You know we went out I never called you back Of course I remember you I cuddled your bum Well, why didn't you return my calls? You know, I thought we had a good time I wasn't all that confident to begin with you know, and you made me feel like I was no better than a seven Oh, Mitchell Come on You are not a seven Look I'd just got out of a relationship and I was lonely I didn't think I could handle anything more than one night so I'm sorry Well, better late than never I suppose Will! I got it! Watch Stake it UK! It's brilliant It's British I'm back So, how've you been? Oh, pretty good after you and I had our thing I met someone, and, we've been together ever since Well, ok We broke up for a bit recently but, he had a fling with someone sent him running back to me Oh, good So, happy ending Yeah, Hey.
he's here now Curt, come here I want you to meet someone Wait You and Cuddle Bum? Wait You and The Nibbler? Wait You and Clammy Hands? Clammy Hands?! Hey! Come on you guys Stake it UK! So Have you thought of anything else to Hello? Let go of my hair! Not until you let me out of here! Ok! I will! Psych! I can't believe you fell for that! You know, you can be really mean sometimes You were really mean to me putting me through that whole song and dance for nothing You hurt my feelings I was sparing your feelings Honey I looked over your proposal and I'm sorry but that dog just won't hunt You need to listen to me You know, I'm pretty good in business How do you think I got so rich? You married someone rich! You know nothing about business Oh, yeah? Well, I know thatin today's uncertain economic climate people are taking a long hard look at any purchase that could be considered a luxury item eg, interior design Then, when you factor in the leading economic indicator ie winter housing starts the negligible impact of the recent interest rate cuts decline in occupancy rates in corporate office space it just seems to me that a smaller company Will be better equipped to respond to shifting market forces but I guess you probably already knew that I know where the market is Come on, honey That's why I didn't want to give you the loan It's better you stay small Lean mean and flat But, Kar, why didn't you just say all of this in the first place? Because expanding this pizza parlor was your dream I didn't wanna just poo on that It's better that you just think I didn't give you the money 'cause I'm mean Oh, Karen That's sweet Now, come on Bust my bust outta here Thanks Now, come on Give me a hug Got you! What are you doing? I'm gonna give you a couple of hours to think about what you did to me