Wonderland (2013) s03e01 Episode Script


They can't cancel my visa before the case is heard.
It was your second assault offence.
This is my whole life we are talking about.
If you just went back It's not an option.
These guys - apparently drug lords - stabbed a cop in front of Carlos.
Does he really think they're gonna try and kill him? Don't panic.
We can work this out.
There's got to be a way around it.
I was just telling Miranda that you should stay with me while you're here.
He wants to spend time with both of us.
It's all about him.
Always was, always will be.
There's nothing wrong with being casual.
There won't be any more late night doorknocking.
I lied to you.
What about? I didn't go to the vineyard to help out my dad.
I went there to sort out things with an old ex of mine.
What did he say about the box? What box? Sasha and Iit's done.
As in, it's over.
They're gonna know that something's up.
Why? We've had girls' nights out before.
Dani is going to kill me when she finds out.
She's gonna kill me first.
I mean, is it really that hard to be honest? Would you even stick around for breakfast? I knew it.
Guys like you make me sick, quite frankly.
I'm sorry.
Excuse us.
Thank you for saving me.
It wasn't you I was rescuing.
Did you just get hit on? She was abusing the poor guy for wanting casual sex.
If I wanted meaningless sex, I would have hung out with Max more.
Should have folded, mate.
Obviously you haven't seen the Wilcox bluff.
Oh, yeah.
Is that when you tell a chick you're open to marriage? I think I figured you out, Thomas.
What? Good cards - stroke your chin? Uh-uh.
I thought it was when he scratched his nuts.
That could be a medical condition.
Alright, raise $10.
Yeah, alright.
Fine, I fold.
I bet the girls are having way more fun.
When was the last time we went out clubbing? Nope.
I've seen you dance.
Nah, I'm up for it.
I'm a member of the most exclusive club in Sydney.
Spanking's totally optional.
Well, it's a toast.
So, OK, what exactly are we toasting? To good friends and great love.
And a rocket up your bum.
How was the girls' night? It was fun.
How was the boys'? Not bad.
Tom lost a hunjy.
And Harry gets spanked the last Friday of every month.
Hey, are you worried about keeping this secret? No.
They're our friends.
Once they start speaking to us again we'll be sweet.
Hello? Hey, Tom? Look, I'm so sorry to call you this late.
Sasha? Is there any chance that you could save me from a little situation? I'm at the restaurant.
What's he doing? OK.
What time is it? Hey.
Oh, it's late.
Well, just sit tight, and I'll be there.
That was Sasha.
Some guy is hassling her at the restaurant.
What, so the only person your ex-girlfriend can call - I mean, it's almost 2am in the morning - is you? What do you want me to do? Don't go.
Yeah, but I just told her I was coming.
Can I? Hello? Hey, come in.
You OK? Yeah.
Was that? Yeah.
He's he's one of our regular customers.
Is he harassing you, is he? Yeah, he's a big spender.
He likes to think that he can buy people.
Like you? Tonight he wanted to take me home, so I made up this really stupid lie.
Well, you.
You're the lie.
I'm I'm the boyfriend? Yeah.
No, you were the only guy that I could call in my recent list, so OK.
I hope I didn't mess you around too much.
No, it's fine.
It's just, you didn't say when we were at the vineyard that you were seeing anyone.
Uh, yeah, I am.
For a couple of months now.
Well, I hope I haven't caused any trouble.
No, it's all good.
It's all good.
What about you? How come there's no boyfriend picking you up? I'm just keeping things simple.
Simple's good.
It's just really important to me to be independent these days, so Wasn't it always? Touche.
It's for you.
No, you don't have to do that.
It's alright.
You'll love it.
Take it.
Ooh, Manderlay Creek! Yeah, remember? Mmm.
A little vineyard in the great valley.
You haven't even started getting ready yet.
I've just been busy working on Carlos' paperwork.
Well, I'll wait.
Steve and Dani are in their room.
Did you have a good time last night? I got lots of photos of you doing your little Madonna vogue thing.
Yeah, my arms are killing me.
How did the boys' poker night go? Yeah.
They had fun.
Tom lost a stack of cash.
Oh, yeah, he's way too easy to read.
So, how long will it take to do Carlos' paperwork? Couple of weeks.
I've got lots of people doing affidavits.
Are you OK? I don't know.
See, I don't even I don't even know why I'm doing this.
You're helping out a friend.
He's lucky I'm not charging him by the hour.
Alright, let's finish up and go.
I thought it was a rule that the bride was supposed to be late.
He's an idiot.
Doesn't listen to a word I say.
Well, you've only got a few more months to put up with him.
Wouldn't know a decent grape from a haemorrhoid.
You should start looking for another job now.
Oh! Now, there's a look we won't be seeing on the catwalks of Milan.
I'm starting a trend.
Are they my gumboots? Yeah.
Is that OK? I found them at the back of the wardrobe.
I can count on one hand the amount of times you've worn them.
Where do you plan on going fishing? Oh, Steve knows a place north of the beach.
You been rock fishing before? Yeah, yeah.
Back in the day.
Oh, just be careful.
Oh, more men die on golf courses every year than rock fishing.
That's from boredom.
I will catch us some lunch.
Oh, great! Sorry.
My husband's so graceful.
How you feeling? Tired.
Why don't you look worse? I was too busy winning Tom's money last night.
Not that the smell of bait won't make me want to chuck.
Oh, you love doing primal things, like killing defenceless, little fish.
Mmm, no, that's my dad.
He's looking forward to it.
You know, I did come back from Singapore to spend time with you.
I can't even get out of bed without a coffee.
That was a hint.
Shame we're out of milk.
I'll see you when I'm done killing things.
Possibly Dad.
What was I meant to do? At the very least, you could have come into my room to apologise when you got back.
Well, your door was closed.
You could have knocked.
I didn't want to wake you.
You think I could sleep after what you did? What, help a friend? She is your ex.
The rules are completely fucking different.
Take it easy.
No, don't you dare tell me to take it easy.
I'm just saying it doesn't have to be a huge drama.
You do not get out of bed at two in the morning to go to another woman, Tom.
You do not.
Can we just back it up? When did we go from no strings attached, to this? Oh, my God! Are youare you still in the first week of our relationship? OK, you're being irrational, so I'm gonna go.
I'll come back and talk to you when you calm down.
Yeah, you take your shitty rust bucket of a car with you.
On a scale of 1 to 10, close to full-on Mount Ava.
At least I wasn't on the other end of it this time.
I didn't mean to break his stupid, ugly vase.
Uh, it's my stupid, ugly vase.
No, at least it wasn't Tom's head.
Yeah, you think? Well, she's hardly the first girl that's lost it at you.
The list gets longer every year.
Where's Mum? I actually came here for sympathy.
Out shopping.
Was it another woman? Why would you assume that? Ava's a nice girl.
Something must have set her off.
Well, I don't remember Mum throwing anything at you.
She has plenty of other ways to make me suffer.
Stop avoiding the question.
Oh, it's nothing.
It's hardly anything.
Call me when Mum's back.
You reckon this is all gonna go smoothly today? Yeah.
Why shouldn't it? Well, a bit to organise.
Nah, it's going to be fine.
Can't let nerves get in the way.
Colette? Hello? Hope I'm not interrupting anything.
That's hilarious Emergency coffee fix.
I've been reduced to stealing your milk.
Yeah, help yourself.
Colette's not here.
Uh, yeah, where is she? Uh, she's at the The spapedicure thing.
Without me? It was last minute.
Did you girls have fun last night? Still not quite sure what the occasion was, though.
Who needs an excuse to go out and have fun? That your final answer? Yes, your honour? So, you guys up for, maybe, a recovery lunch this afternoon? Carlos? Sure.
Text me later.
I've got a job, soI can't.
What about, uh, Colette? She busy? You'll definitely have to ask her.
You know, I definitely will.
Thanks for the milk.
Look out! How old are you? You used to love me doing that.
I used to hate you doing that, even when it wasn't stupidly dangerous.
You look ridiculous, by the way.
Well, you look cold.
I'm on.
I'm on.
Easy! Easy.
Loosen the drag.
Loosen the drag.
It's all about give and take.
She's a beauty.
He's a feisty bugger.
Stay with it.
Don'tdon't get impatient.
Argh! Don't worry, mate.
Happens to the best of us.
Yeah, next time, let me do it my way.
I'll fix it up.
I'll get the tackle box.
Honey? What are you talking about? Uh, babe, there's not much reception down here.
Nah, you're gonna have to explain it when I get back.
Dani, I can't hear you.
Uh, I don't know.
Oh, Max.
Hhow are you? Awkward.
Is it? Self-doubt really isn't an issue for you, is it? Oh, you'd be surprised.
Listen, I was wondering if you might be interested in coming out on a job with me this afternoon.
Are you serious? Well, there's no guarantee on the story getting a run, but a decent photo should help.
Um Just because we had different expectations doesn't mean that we can't work together.
Well, I guess I just assumed that us working together was off the table.
Well, that would be a shame.
You're an excellent photographer.
See ya.
Grace, why aren't you answering? I have been texting you for, like, an hour.
I have major, big gossip.
Just call me back, OK? ASAP.
Should warn me if I need to duck.
Ava's not here.
What, is she off buying a gun, is she? Tom, she may have anger issues Which you could have warned me about.
and the key throwing was a bit full-on.
But you got what you deserved.
Is that so? Ava said all along she wasn't expecting commitment from me.
There's a difference between not being committed, and actually putting another woman in front of her.
A big difference.
Yeah, and there's a difference between sleeping with another woman and going to help a mate - who's also a chick.
Big difference.
Why do you jump when Sasha calls? No.
I've said my piece.
I'm staying out of it.
You must remember Cressbrook Dam.
Yeah, I remember camping there, just not with you.
Caught a dozen bass? Ate like kings? How can you not remember something so memorable? Uh, Probably because I was Try one of my blade lures.
Might have better luck.
No, blades are good for dam fishing, not out here.
You'll just get snagged on the rocks.
Remember Al's Outdoor Store? Got me on a multiple blade years ago.
They sell those lures to gullible idiots because they're more expensive.
I worked there part-time for a year and a half.
Yeah, yeah, I know.
Really? Because I'm pretty sure you were gone by then.
Well, that was a biggie.
Dad? Dad?! Dad! Dad! I can see you.
Swim away from the rocks.
I'll get you up! Well, that wasn't as much fun as it looked.
Bloody boots were dragging me down.
Now you get why I dress light.
For a second back there, when you said, "Swim away from the rocks.
" I thought you were hoping I wasn't gonna come back.
That was a joke.
Yeah, not a funny one.
At least if I'd gone under for good, I'd be keeping him company.
That is a stupid thing to say.
Ease up, mate.
I almost drowned.
He would have loved sharing this kind of stuff.
Well, instead you're stuck here with me, the sensible one.
Where'd that come from? I've always been proud of you.
Parents have their favourites.
I loved you both.
Look, Dad It was guilt.
That's why I left.
Look, I'm not angry, and I don't hate you, but two hours of fishing isn't gonna make up for 12 years.
Seagulls will always stay above an eagle.
So they get the handlers to stand on top of the MCG, and get the eagle to spread its wings.
No seagulls land on the field - problem solved, and nothing gets hurt in the process.
So, it's a human interest piece? Can you get a little bit closer? Ravi, can you see if you can get it to spread its wings? It's awe-inspiring.
Oh, it'sit is beautiful, in a dead-eyed kind of way.
I, um, I saw you at the beach this morning.
Did you? Mm-hm.
Were you were you breaking up with her? Yeah.
Oh! Don't ask.
Where are my gumboots? Look at you! What happened? Oh, it's an oyster cut.
It's just a scratch.
How did you get so wet? Swept in like a bloody amateur.
Our bucket of fish went in too.
Oh! Look, I'll replace the boots.
I'm sorry.
Oh, don't worry about that.
Did Steve go in too? Bloody disaster from start to finish.
With Steve? You go and get changed, and join us for lunch.
Thank you.
Tinned tuna alright? Perfect.
I take it Bear Grylls isn't supplying any fish? He's had a tough morning.
Don't let him near Dad if he's looking for sympathy.
So, how did you upset Ava? Who said anything about upsetting Ava? So, a friend calls - middle of the night, needs help - I go out and help them.
Doesn't sound so bad.
Thank you, Mum.
Who was the friend? A he or a she? Leaving now.
Should have been in the workshop hours ago.
Love you.
Ah! Uh-uh.
Don't even think about it.
Fair enough.
What? No calling me a wuss? Paying me out? You know your limitations.
I'm not sure if you complimented or insulted me just then.
A little bit of both.
You know, I didn't have you down as the unadventurous type.
Give it to me.
Are you sure? Can't believe I'm doing this.
You know, sometimes nature really gets it right.
Excuse me for a sec.
Trent? Who's asking? A mutual friend of ours told me you got out yesterday.
Said you might be able to help me.
Hey? Hey?! Listen.
I'll make it worth your while.
So, how was it? Oh, it wasn't about the fish.
It was about spending magical one-on-one time OK, now, the reason why I called, is I'm pretty sure Rob and Colette are renewing their vows together this afternoon in secret.
Well, that doesn't sound right.
No, no! I thought it all through.
So, last night was like a covert hen's and bucks' night.
They wanted to involve us, but they didn't want to tell us.
I found two buttonhole roses in the fridge, and they have booked Charlotte for one o'clock at The Point.
Who's Charlotte? Charlotte.
Our Charlotte.
Our celebrant, Charlotte.
Oh, Charlotte.
Well, why would they do it in secret? Oh, come on.
Isn't that obvious? After what happened last time, as if Colette's gonna go through that publicly again.
Well, I suppose Rob does owe her.
Now, come on.
We don't have long.
Well, hang on, even if you're right, they clearly don't want anyone else there.
Some people need to be saved from themselves.
They are our friends, and we will support them.
Even if they don't want us to.
Oi! That was your cue to come and have a shower.
Hey! That was surprisingly fun.
I'm not sure if you just complimented or insulted me.
Uh, a little of both.
See you.
What are you doing? All his emotional baggage in one little box.
Did Tom say that you could take that out? Well, put it back.
Well, I had to know what I was up against.
And you should read some of Sasha's letters.
She's really good.
Well, no, it's not my place.
And it's not yours either, Ava.
I'm gonna see him.
Well, you need to put it back.
I don't care if he knows.
Look, I know I went off.
I justI lose my head sometimes.
Almost lost mine.
Got a good arm.
I don't want this to be over.
Neither do I.
So, we can fix it, but we just need to have some ground rules.
Rules? Uh, one rule really.
You can't ever see Sasha again.
So, you're giving me an ultimatum? I forgave you for lying when you went to the vineyard to meet her, but that was your one free shot.
Yeah, but that was just about the past.
Nowwe're just friends.
Tom, whatever you say, whatever you want to think, OK, you are starting down that path with her.
Well No.
Don't argue, OK? I know the signs, and I trust my instincts.
So, either you agree to never see her again, or we've got a problem.
I would never ask the same of you.
And you wouldn't have to.
My exes are very much exes.
Yeah, but it ended such a long time ago.
Either there's trust or there's no trust.
Then I guess there isn't.
Well, if things are so bad up there there's nothing stopping you from coming down here, then.
Well, call me stubborn, but I've never liked change.
Someone once said, the path of least resistance is really the most fulfilling.
Jesus, I didn't think I was having lunch with Mahatma Gandhi.
Warwick! Nothing wrong with being a Steady Eddy, mate.
But maybe it's time for you to get out of your comfort zone, eh? Hey, for a bloke sitting here drinking my wine, you've got a lot to say for yourself.
I'll, um, take this.
Car's fixed.
Took a look.
Did you find my dignity? I stopped at the bank.
What's that for? Well, ever since you bought my shitty rust bucket, you've been paying me out about it.
So, you want to buy it back? You know, I assume you might call that a neat way of cutting ties between us.
That's not my intention.
I just, I didn't want you to feel Oh, well, either way, I think you made your point.
So You're a lot like that car, Tom.
You're great on the outside, but .
underneath the bonnet, nothing works how it should.
You better be right about this.
I am.
And why do I ever doubt you? Hello! Caught you.
And what on Earth made you think you could get away with this? Um, who told you? Well, bow down.
Dani is the master.
Oh, no! Don't be mad! We love you.
We just want to support you.
Oh, you think this is about us? We're not idiots.
Uh, you kind of are.
I justI don't understand Whatever.
Say it.
You cut me out of your wedding.
We had to be discreet.
Oh, now I have a big mouth? No.
I would've helped organise it with you.
No-one does a wedding like I do.
Listen, I know how much marriage means to you, and you and Steve, you're the perfect couple and I don't know.
I guess II just felt What?! I felt embarrassed, and I didn't want to disrespect the whole thing.
Well, now I feel embarrassed, because my best friend didn't trust me enough to share this with her.
I didn't know what you would think, but I knew where Steve would stand.
So? Well, so, if either of you had started pointing out how risky or stupid this whole sham wedding thing is for me, then .
I couldn't have done it.
Well, you told Colette and Rob.
We just needed two witnesses, and they already knew about Carlos' visa issues.
Do your parents know? I rang them earlier, butno.
Oh, Gracie, you've got to tell them.
I have a horrible feeling my dad's gonna cry.
I am not sure that you deserve this, but come here.
Wow, you really must love him.
What? To do something so huge for him.
Well, I reckon it's as good as any reason to get married.
Really? That's all you have to say? Good luck to 'em.
See, I disagree.
I think it's a terrible reason to get married.
I'm pretty sure it's meant to be about love and commitment, not bailing someone out of trouble.
You're such a straighty 180 sometimes, mate.
Yes, I know.
I guess it's my dad's track record.
I just I want it to mean more than that.
What about my folks? They've been married 30 years, but are they happy? Still together? I don't think so.
Well, that's why you gotta get it right - take it seriously.
Or, marriage for practical reasons.
You're only saying that because you've never met a woman you'd want to marry.
Not entirely true.
Oh, no! Nope.
I don't count the she-devil.
Still asked her, though.
And it would have been a disaster if it ever happened.
Come on, let's get upstairs.
Is Ava coming? Oh I reckon we might need a beer before we get into that one, mate.
Yeah, I know it's a lot to get your heads around.
So, they just killed the guy? God, you must have been terrified.
Yeah, I was.
So, you're saying if you go back, your actual life's in danger? Yeah, it's a different world over there.
I get it, but immigration aren't idiots.
Well, there's no reason for them to find out.
And if they do? You do realise So, are you gonna live together? Um, yeah.
Carlos is moving in with me when Dani moves to Singapore.
We've submitted the residency applications.
It'll be cool.
What's the worst that can happen? He'll be deported, and she'll go to prison.
Well, I think you're amazing.
Thank you.
Let's just hope it doesn't screw up the rest of my life.
Too late.
Already married.
Thank you for those words of comfort.
We always intended to tell you guys today and make FAT night a celebration.
Hey, so, this means I don't have to get a wedding present? Cheers.
Well done, Tom.
Oh, my gosh.
How are we meant to compete? Wow.
It's a sneak job.
Extra points because it's a wedding banquet.
Yeah, but you lose points for not filleting.
Oh, ignore him - he's got size envy.
I mean, I know it's not a real wedding, but it's still a special occasion.
And we appreciate it.
Married only 5 minutes, and apparently I've already lost my identity.
Hello, all.
Kisses for the kids.
Hey, Dad.
Sweetheart, I just want to tell you that I'm thinking of heading back to Brisbane at the end of this week.
Oh, what? I thought we had you for at least another month.
I don't want to outstay my welcome.
So, I was hoping we could all do something together tomorrow.
Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, we'd love that.
What happened to your head? Steve didn't say anything? I didn't get a chance.
Well, got washed off the rocks when we were fishing.
Oh, my God! Steve rescued me.
Scary stuff.
Well, are you OK? Did you go to the hospital? Sweetheart, I am fine.
Look at me! Slipped your mind? Well, you were a bit caught up in someone else's wedding.
What have we got? Are we admiring the look of Ava's car in the driveway? It's mine again.
Oh, what?! Well, I gave Ava her money back.
When were you gonna tell me? I had to get away from him.
Well, do you have somewhere to go? A workmate's offered me her spare room until I find somewhere more permanent.
Just stay here.
Sleep on it.
There's no point.
Look, you saw the baby ultrasound.
That would have been a huge thing between them.
Which is why I won't try to compete with all that history.
And you know what, he'll probably just end up with her anyway.
You're the one letting Sasha get in between the two of you.
Miranda, he is still in love with her.
II feel sorry for Tom.
Yeah, I'm sure.
You weren't honest with him.
You told him that you didn't want commitment.
Yeah, and you're always so honest when it comes to your feelings, right? Because you didn't tell me the truth the first time I asked you about you and Tom.
I'm sorry? You like him.
Yeah OK.
Yeah, OK, I do.
I do like him.
I'm sorry It's complicated.
We can't be more than friends.
Keep it that way.
Don't make the mistake of thinking that you can save him, because he'll never change.
He'll justhe'll break your heart.
What happened with Ava? Or can't I know? Do you think people can change, Dad? People don't tend to change, but circumstances do.
Do you have to go? Not sick of me? Not yet.
We'll have a big celebration tomorrow, eh? All of us together.
This looks amazing.
Aw! I baked it myself.
No, you didn't! No, I didn't.
I told Colette not to bother, but this this is really lovely.
Well, you've got to have a cake.
Thank you.
I love you.
I know.
More than I love the groom.
Is that kind of weird? No, not at all.
Who wants cake? Yes! Yes? But you don't think it was a slight overreaction? Well, once Ava gets her mind on something, it's hard to stop her.
I admire her for drawing a line.
This is Tom we're talking about.
Oh, that's mine.
Oh, leave it.
Hey! No, let him answer it.
I mean, every FAT night is the same thing.
If you make a rule, stick to it.
When? Oh, don't you be talking about rule breaking.
You're the one who got married illegally to stay in the country.
And you're the woman who married me to stay in the country.
Oh, yeah, I am.
Do you want to say that again? Do you want the rest of my cake in your face? Is this their first argument as a married couple? Alright, ta.
Monumental cock up.
Please don't say it.
I have to fly back tonight.
What about tomorrow and your dad? I can't.
They need me there.
I have to go back.
You got married? Yeah.
Harry, come join us.
Have a drink.
We'll celebrate.
The better man won.
No Warwick? Gone back to the vineyard.
He's doing his best.
No doubt about that.
We both know he was punching above his weight when he married you.
So, did you tell Steve and Miranda you were thinking of leaving early? Yeah.
I just got a text, though.
Steve has had to rush back to Singapore, which means we won't have any time to have a proper goodbye .
if I head back this week.
So, put it off.
I mean, have you really given this everything? Well, whether I have not, my kids have their own lives to lead.
Unless there's another reason I should stay? Stay or go.
It's your decision.
So, how are you gonna even get an international flight tonight? Rebecca's booked me a domestic to Melbourne first.
Good old Rebecca.
You know, not telling me that your dad nearly drowned is pretty messed up.
I was telling you, but you talked over me, and then I couldn't be bothered.
Knew he'd milk it for all it's worth.
Oh, my God! He nearly died.
Have you seen my adaptor thingy? I'm not being callous.
I freaked out when he got swept in, but he's fine.
Note to self - don't ever piss off Steve too much, because he'll hold a grudge for the rest of his life.
So, what? This Rebecca crisis is more important than your family? Oh, it's not a Rebecca crisis! It's work.
And if you had any idea what it's like for me over there, you'd know it's a hell of a lot more important than my old man's ego.
Steve, he's just trying Can you just leave it?! Do you think I should give her a call? Maybe in a year or ten.
Oh, no, thank you, guys, for everything.
Well, you guys know you still have to make this thing If you say consummate in the next sentence, I'm gonna kill you.
Thanks, man.
Thank you.
To be young and newly wed, huh? A big day.
Certainly was.
What you have done for me, I don't know that I'll ever be able to thank you properly.
Well, you can start by pretending this isn't as weird as it feels.
I can try.
A nice hug, no sex, separate apartments - people will think we've been married for years.
Good night.
Carlos? Don't forget that we have to lodge the marriage with immigration first thing.
Got it.