Bob Hearts Abishola (2019) s03e12 Episode Script

Your Beans are Flatlining

Previously on Bob Hearts Abishola How did you do on your MCAT practice test? [GROANS.]
I didn't have a chance to take it yet.
I thought you were doing it last week.
Yes, but work was very busy.
And then Bob wanted to take me to see a movie.
Uh-uh! A movie? Yes, it was date night.
Mom, your studies should always come before dating and lollygagging.
- [LAUGHS.]
Yes, Dele.
- At this rate, I'll become a doctor before you.
Yes, Dele.
E kasaan, Mum.
- Dele? - Surprise! Oh, Dele, my baby boy.
- I've missed you so much.
- I've missed you, too.
I don't understand How did you get here? - Abishola? - Mummy.
I see you have gained weight since the wedding.
Surprise.
I still cannot believe you're here in Detroit.
It was nice to finally be invited.
Although it would've been nice to know you were coming ahead of time.
That would've ruined the surprise.
Yes, it would have.
Mummy, would you like to visit the hospital and see where I work? - Are you a doctor yet? - No.
I will visit when you are a doctor.
[MOUTHING.]
EBUNOLUWA: Unacceptable! These are not the test scores of a future doctor! They're really not that bad.
These are the scores of drug addicts and chiropractors! I'm sure Dele tried his best.
Not him.
Her.
My MCAT results.
It was a 519.
519? I have no idea what that means.
It means she did not study hard enough.
- I am sorry, Mummy.
I can do better.
- How? By sitting around, arguing with me? No, by studying harder.
That is right.
Did I say you could go? No, Mummy.
Now you may go.
ABISHOLA: Yes, Mummy.
Not so fast, I am still shouting at you.
Yes, Mummy.
That was kind of hard to watch, huh? Yeah.
Are you smiling? Yeah.
["IFANLA" BY SOLA AKINGBOLA PLAYING.]
Hey.
Hello.
- You okay? - No.
Yeah, I kind of figured.
Your mom really did a number on you.
I did a number on myself.
I let everyone down.
You didn't let me down.
That's because you don't know any better.
I came here to be supportive.
That is the problem.
You think I can do no wrong.
And I started to believe it.
Okay, no more compliments.
That would be helpful.
So you are not going to say anything? All I can think of are nice things.
It's gonna take a while.
This is just a small setback.
I'm going to take the MCAT again.
And I'm going to be accepted into Johns Hopkins.
Yeah, and if not, there are plenty of other great schools.
No, there is only Johns Hopkins.
Wait, the Baltimore Johns Hopkins? Yes, they have the best medical school.
Why would I go anywhere else? Maybe to live closer to your husband? You will move there in my fourth year.
That will give you enough time to step back from MaxDot.
What are you talking about? Our future.
Well, when were you gonna run our future by me? - I did run it by you.
- When? When I told you I want to become a doctor.
Well, what if I don't want you to go to Baltimore? - So you are forbidding me? - No! I just think we should discuss this.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Do you want me to be a doctor? - Yes.
Then I am going to Baltimore end of discussion.
I don't think you know how a discussion works.
So, what, I'm just supposed to become a Ravens fan now? ABISHOLA: Are they not a better team? BOB: Okay, that's a low blow.
Sounds like there's trouble in paradise.
Another marital problem that we will have to help them navigate.
- They're so lucky to have us.
- Mm.
When I was a newlywed, there was nothing to navigate.
You just did what your husband said and you made sure he never saw you without makeup.
My husband still has never seen my naked face.
- Really? - I sleep in full makeup and a girdle.
Max's funeral was a sad day.
But not having to wear a bra to bed - was a game changer.
- Mm.
We are good wives.
- And damn good mothers.
- Mm.
I've seen you in action.
I like your style.
And I yours.
I find your use of money and guilt very intriguing.
- You work with the tools you have.
- Mm.
I've seen you get the job done with just your voice.
It took many beatings to get to that point.
Hard work pays off.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
Did you know Dr.
Michaels went to Wake Forest? That's too bad, I used to respect him.
What's wrong with Wake Forest? It sounds like a place where they teach you how to operate on chipmunks.
Who cares where he got his degree? Oh, so you want your heart surgeon to be a graduate of Chuck E.
Cheese University? My mother said if I don't go to Johns Hopkins, I might as well be a prostitute.
They are both equally embarrassing.
But you're not becoming a doctor to please your mother.
Of course I am.
What other reason could there be? To help people.
I could've sworn she was going to say money.
That would have been a good point.
I was gonna be a doctor, but it wasn't because of my mom, or the money.
It was because the human body is an amazing thing.
I would hold the power of life and death in my own two hands.
You sound like a serial killer.
Who went to Wake Forest.
And now I believe it is time for a presentation from our new head of marketing.
Why didn't I get that job? Do you really want me to go into it? No.
Go ahead, Kofo.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
We know compression socks improve circulation during air travel, so I am proposing we begin to sell our products in airports.
Interesting.
A hurried business traveler, making their way through the concourse, spots a colorful kiosk.
"MaxDot socks.
Come fly with us.
" Ooh, sexy.
I am threatened and jealous.
That means it is a good idea.
I like it, too.
Let's do it.
Hang on, you can't just make a call like that without discussing it.
What's to discuss? You heard your brother, it's sexy.
You have any idea how much something like that might cost? The initial investment would be minimal.
Yeah, and then what, huh? You can make all the plans you want, doesn't mean they're gonna happen that way Actions have consequences! The projected costs are on page five.
BOB: Fine.
You got all the answers, you clearly don't need me here.
Do your own meeting.
What was that about? Baltimore.
- E kaale, Mummy.
- What are you doing? - Studying.
- Where is dinner? - I have not started it.
- Bob will be home soon.
- He can wait.
- [GASPS.]
Oh, no.
Another man is going to divorce you.
I will just order him takeout.
You would let your husband be fed by a pimply teenager in a paper hat? Fine, I'll stop studying and start dinner.
I did not say stop studying.
You can read and stir at the same time.
- What if I cannot? - Then you will kill your mother with shame.
- Mummy! - I can see my obituary now.
"Ebunoluwa Adebisi Odegbami "is survived by Abishola Bolatito Odegbami: Twice divorced and still not a doctor.
" [MONITOR BEEPING STEADILY.]
Your patient appears stable, Doctor.
I will make the incision.
Scalpel.
- Scalpel.
- Clamp.
- Clamp.
- [RINGING.]
- Beans.
- Beans? That's the timer for your beans.
Please, I need to focus on the surgery.
Are you sure? I smell something burning.
Okay.
Stay right here.
Are you just going to cut me open and leave? Ah, Mummy.
One moment.
I can't do everything at once.
Why not? I could.
- The patient is flatlining! - [MONITOR DRONING.]
- Are you satisfied? I am dying! - No, no, no, no, no! And now your beans are flatlining.
- I will fix it! - Are we gonna have dinner any time soon? - Forget about me! Your husband is starving! - Abishola! - Abishola.
- Abishola.
- GLORIA: Abishola.
- BOB: Abishola.
Abishola.
- [GASPS.]
Oluwa mi o.
- What? What is it? I just had a horrible dream.
You want to talk about it? Do you think I'm taking on too much responsibility? Oh, yeah.
What? But you can handle it.
You're like a sports car.
You're not meant to drive regular streets.
You're at your best burning through a curve at Talladega.
I do not understand any of that, but thank you.
Why are you dreaming? You should be studying.
[GASPS.]
- Karo, Bob.
- E karo, Mama Ebun.
Something smells delicious.
Your lunch.
Pounded yam and okra soup.
Thank you.
That certainly beats the vending machine snack medley I was gonna eat.
No man with a wife should be eating from a vending machine.
Eh, it's not bad.
The right combination of beef jerky and corn chips will give you a stomachache that lasts right up until dinnertime.
Abishola should be making your lunch every day.
I am perfectly capable of feeding myself long as my dollar's not too wrinkled.
Do not worry.
I know Abishola has been neglecting you, and I have spoken to her.
Thank you, but we're fine.
Bob, please, you can be honest with me.
- I am.
- You are not.
Okay.
Well, you know how I feel better than I do.
That is right.
So, from now on, I will see to it that she cooks you a full meal to take to work every day.
You don't need to see to that.
Oh, but I do.
No, you don't.
Abishola's job isn't to take care of me.
It certainly is.
Listen, all due respect, but Abishola and I don't need your help.
Is that so? I'm not trying to offend you.
I just think we can handle this ourselves.
I see.
Enjoy your jerky.
Aah! Is it okay if I study in here? The grannies are out there - talking about which foods give them gas.
- [ABISHOLA LAUGHS.]
Oh, no.
A boy should not have to hear that.
Come in.
Is that biochemistry? Yep.
I hate biochemistry.
Me, too.
What would you do if I did not want you to become a doctor? Whatever you wanted me to do.
Yes, but what if it was your decision? - A lawyer.
- Why? Because that's what you said your second choice was.
Forget about what I want.
I don't know how to do that.
If you could be anything, what would you be? - Anything? - Yes.
Well, I guess hypothetically, I would move to New York and see if I can get into a dance program.
Hypothetically.
A dance program? NYU has a choreography degree that only takes three years.
So, when people ask me, "What does Dele do?" I'm supposed to say, "He's in New York learning to gyrate"? I have reconsidered.
I would be a lawyer.
This is why I decide for you.
You are too wishy-washy.
Ugh.
- [KNOCK ON DOOR.]
- Come in.
Mr.
Wheeler, these are ready for your signature.
When you see Kofo, tell him I want to talk to him.
You do not need to talk to him.
I already yelled at him again for having such a stupid idea.
It wasn't a stupid idea.
I just got some stuff - going on at home.
- And as the boss, it is your right to take that out on your underlings.
Abishola wants to go to med school in Baltimore.
Of course, Johns Hopkins.
That is where my daughter is going.
- You got a kid in college? - Preschool.
Abishola's just gonna leave me here.
That will be very difficult for her.
- For her? - Yes.
She is the one leaving her family.
I was away from my wife for four years when I first came to America.
I didn't know that.
Abishola will be in a city she does not know, studying all day and coming home to no one.
I mean, I'll-I'll probably visit her every other weekend.
Oh, that will be nice.
My only companion was the mouse that lived behind the stove.
Of course, once winter came and the radiator turned on, I never saw him again.
These are ready to go.
28.
29.
30.
You're getting stronger.
Before you know it, I'll be lifting cars off children.
Don't set unachievable goals.
You will only disappoint yourself and the ones you love.
It was a joke.
It was not very good.
What the heck is wrong with you? This whole doctor foolishness.
I'm too old.
And besides, I will never get into Johns Hopkins.
Say that again but closer to my good hand so I can smack you with it.
Either way, the stress of it all will tear Bob and I apart.
Maybe being a doctor was not the right path for me.
Of course it's the right path for you.
You'll be great.
How do you know? Without you, I could never do this.
Ta-da.
You can stand? Stick around, honey, watch me work on my twerk.
Your mother can walk.
- What? - She also attempted to twerk.
Which is surprisingly good exercise for rehabilitation.
I don't need the specifics.
I just need to know how long before she can twerk on out of here.
There is still more progress to be made, but apparently she's been able to walk for weeks.
- And you're just finding out about this now? - Yes.
Being out of the loop isn't fun, is it? I see what you are doing.
- What? - Since I left you out of the loop, you are drawing a parallel between me and Dottie.
I don't care what your mom says.
You are smart.
So, you do not want me to go to Johns Hopkins? What I want is to be part of the conversation about our future.
Where would you want me to go? Johns Hopkins.
I wouldn't want you to settle for anything less.
You know I would never settle for anything less.
I do.
[EXHALES.]
I will retake the MCAT.
Sorry.
We will discuss it.
You're retaking the MCAT.
Good idea.
There is one more thing we need to talk about.
- Okay.
- We got to get your mother back to Nigeria.
I concur with this plan.
Good discussion.
Oh, that was good, huh? Hey, top me off, will you, Bobby? Bottle's on the counter.
And I'll bet you can get it yourself.
It is good for you to start using those muscles.
I never took you for a snitch.
- Look at her go.
[CHUCKLES.]
- Hey! Good job, Dottie.
We're so proud of you.
All right, stop gawking.
I'm not a show pony.
AUNTIE OLU: You know, during the week, Tunde and I speed walk at the mall.
UNCLE TUNDE: You should join us.
We do a mile, then reward ourselves with a Cinnabon.
EBUNOLUWA: Abishola will be working at Cinnabon if she does not get her scores up.
What kind of wife makes her mother-in-law - get her own glass of wine? - Gauze.
- I did not raise you like this.
- Gauze.
You know better.
[MUFFLED GRUNTING.]
- More beans? - Yes, please.
- Hey, you got any gauze I could shove in my mom's piehole? - [DOTTIE LAUGHING.]
I'm the worst, aren't I? [LAUGHS.]

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