The Simpsons Season 18 Episode Guide

You Kent Always Say What You Want

Production Code: #JABF15

When at the ice-cream parlor, Homer purchases the one-millionth ice cream cone and is featured on Kent Brockman's nightly news show. However, the interview turns sour when Kent uses a shocking expletive and Flanders starts an anti-indecency campaign against him. The interviewer loses his job and moves in with the Simpsons, and with the help of Lisa, hatches a plan for his comeback. When he speaks out against a FOX ploy, he is offered his old job back complete with raise.

View episode script

24 Minutes

Production Code: #JABF14

In a 24 parody, Skinner opens a counter-truancy unit with Lisa in charge. Homer is sent on a mission to dispose of a toxic container of expired yoghurt, but it falls into the wrong hands - the bullies, that plan to detonate it at the school bake sale. Lisa suggests Bart helps them after Milhouse fails, but when he realises what's happening, he returns to Lisa - only to be tied up by Martin, an undercover spy. However, he manages to contact Lisa and the whole crisis is averted - just.

View episode script

Stop, or My Dog Will Shoot

Production Code: #JABF12

Homer gets excited about going to Oktoberfest until he realises that Marge tricked him into going to a no-alcohol harvest festival. He accidentally leads his family into a maize maze, and Homer is left behind when the family escape. Santa's Little Helper manages to find him, and becomes a hero - and a police dog. He becomes angry at home, so he is sent to live with Lou. As a replacement, Bart gets Strangles the python, who causes chaos at show and tell until SLH turns up to save him.

View episode script

Crook and Ladder

Production Code: #JABF13

Marge takes away Maggie's pacifier, causing her to destroy the Simpsons home. The dog gives her a squeaky toy, which Maggie uses instead. However, it keeps Homer up all night, and he takes sleeping pills. Bart takes advantage, but Homer wakes up while driving and crashes into the fire station. While they recover, Homer, Apu, Moe and Skinner become firemen. When they save Burns' house without reward, they steal some posessions, and it becomes a habit until Marge notices.

View episode script

The Boys of Bummer

Production Code: #JABF11

Bart is playing well for the Springfield Isotots baseball team, pushing his team into the championships. The team are pitted against Shelbyville, and Bart has a chance to win the game - but misses the ball completely, causing his team to lose. The whole town turns against Bart, and he becomes deranged, spraying graffiti all over town. The town reluctantly agree to restage the game to give Bart the chance to redeem himself. Meanwhile, Homer inadvertently becomes a bed salesman.

View episode script

Marge Gamer

Production Code: #JABF10

Marge decides to buy her own computer, and she starts playing on an online fantasy game called Earthland Realms. On the game, she encounters a dark character that later turns out to be Bart. She constantly frets over him, and Bart accidentally kills her in a mad rage. Bart acts on some advice and uses his life power to revive Marge. However, while Bart is down, his castle is looted and his character is killed. Meanwhile, Homer referees Lisa's soccer game, and does a typically bad job.

View episode script

Homerazzi

Production Code: #JABF06

Marge decides to purchase a fireproof safe to protect the family's most precious valuables, but a freak accident causes the safe itself to explode and destroy its contents, including Marge's family photo album. Marge decides to restage all of the family's photographs, and when a celebrity dating scandal is captured in the background of one of their photos, the Simpsons strike tabloid gold. Homer takes to the streets as one of the paparazzi.

View episode script

Rome-Old and Juli-eh

Production Code: #JABF08

The court appoints an accountant for Homer when he incorrectly files for bankruptcy, which results in his cutting back on all of his expenses, including Grampas nursing home. Grampa and Selma fall in love and move in together, and Homer and Patty plot to break up their love connection. Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa con a delivery man into giving them the most sought-after commodity in the neighborhood cardboard boxes.

View episode script

Yokel Chords

Production Code: #JABF09

Lisa protests denying education to Cletus Spuckler's hillbilly kids, Principal Skinner offers her a chance to tutor the kids herself. However, Lisa's plans to help are diverted when Krusty spots the kids during their field trip and decides to use them as a musical act for his show. Meanwhile, Bart tries to scare his peers out of the cafeteria by claiming it's haunted by the ghost of an old school chef who uses students as ingredients in his recipes.

View episode script

Springfield Up

Production Code: #JABF07

Filmmaker Declan Desmond offers an inside look at his work chronicling the growth and development of some of Springfields finest for his documentary, Growing up Springfield, from childhood to the present. Those profiled include Marge, Moe and Homer, who attempts to convince Declan and his crew that he is a millionaire. However, a suspicious Desmond challenges the Simpsons, who have a lot of questions to answer about their success.

View episode script

Little Big Girl

Production Code: #JABF04

Lisa struggles to find excitement in her family heritage for a school presentation, so she decides to craft her heritage as a Native American, since its only for a school project. What begins as an innocent embellishment quickly turns into a web of lies. Bart is granted a drivers license, and in an attempt to escape endless family errands and chauffeuring he flees to a faraway town where he is romanced by an older teenage girl, Darcy.

View episode script

Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Three Times

Production Code: #JABF05

After the Simpsons' car breaks down, the family tells each other tales of revenge gone wrong. Marge offers a cautionary tale of revenge from 19th-century France, where Homer is charged with treason; Lisa tells of a nerd revenge at Springfield Elementary involving Milhouse leading the nerds to overthrow the bullies; and Bart's story follows the great crime-fighter Red Revenge.

View episode script

The Wife Aquatic

Production Code: #JABF03

Marge becomes depressed as she is reminded of memorable childhood vacations spent at Barnacle Bay. Homer and the kids treat her to a surprise trip to the bay, only to discover that it has turned into a rundown mess due to the absence of fish. Meanwhile, Homer is forced to work on a fishing vessel that's threatened by a huge storm. Homer and the kids lovingly give the boardwalk a whole new makeover for Marge.

View episode script

Kill Gil (Volumes 1 & 2)

Production Code: #JABF01

Marge decides to take the family holiday shopping. Gil, as Santa Claus, gives Lisa a sold-out Malibu Stacy doll that belongs to his boss' daughter. When Gil loses his job, the Simpsons invite him over for Christmas dinner, which becomes a huge mistake as Gil moves in uninvited and mooches off the Simpsons. Out of guilt, Marge continually allows Gil to prolong his stay. After a full year, Marge throws Gil out - on Christmas Eve.

View episode script

The Haw-Hawed Couple

Production Code: #JABF02

Bart convinces all his friends not to go to Nelsons birthday party, but Marge forces him to attend. Bart becomes Nelson's new best friend and under Nelson's protection no one dares to mess with Bart. However, he can no longer pal around with Milhouse. So when the bully catches him on an illicit rendezvous with Millhouse, Bart begins to fear for his safety. Meanwhile, Homer takes an interest in Lisa's fantasy story books.

View episode script

Ice Cream of Margie (With the Light Blue Hair)

Production Code: #HABF22

After Homer gets fired at the nuclear power plant, he takes over the ice cream truck business, while a depressed Marge creates popsicle stick sculptures to keep busy. The sculptures quickly become popular and Marge is excited to have a purpose in life, but when Homer crashes his ice cream van into her sculptures, she accuses him of only caring about himself. She reveals a large popsicle sculpture of Homer on top of city hall.

View episode script

Moe 'N' A Lisa

Production Code: #HABF19

When Homer forgets Moe's birthday, Moe's anger inspires Lisa to write about him for her school report. She finds a poetic side to Moe and helps him get published in "American Poetry Perspectives." However, when Moe is featured at a literary conference where he encounters celebrated authors Gore Vidal, Michael Chabon, Tom Wolfe and Jonathan Franzen (all guest-voicing as themselves), he takes all the credit despite Lisa's feelings.

View episode script

G.I.D'oh

Production Code: #HABF21

Homer falls prey to a couple of Army recruiters and lands himself in basic training. Homer treats this like summer camp and infuriates his hard-nosed colonel when he is unfazed by the constant hazing and humiliation. Homer is assigned as the enemy of the Armys war games, but when the war games get out of hand and Springfield becomes the battlefield, Homer and the Springfield community must join forces.

View episode script

Treehouse of Horror XVII

Production Code: #HABF17

In 'Married to the Blob', a meteor falls to Earth and reveals a green goo which Homer mistakes for a marshmallow, turning him into a rampaging blob. In 'You Gotta Know When to Golem', Bart brings Golem to life and forces him to carry out his ghastly bidding. And, in 'The Day The Earth Looked Stupid', in a spoof of War of the Worlds, the citizens of 1938 Springfield react with nonchalance to an invasion by Kang and Kodos.

View episode script

Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em

Production Code: #HABF20

Marge convinces Homer to buy a refined collection of carpentry books. To Marge's dismay, the books only gather dust until she accidentally breaks a nightstand and uses the books to fix it herself. Soon, Marge decides to transform her skills into a business. But the residents of Springfeld don't trust her to make repairs so she hires Homer as a "front" while she handles the real work. Meanwhile, peanuts are banned at Springfield Elementary.

View episode script

Jazzy and the Pussycats

Production Code: #HABF18

When Bart turns a quiet funeral into a chaotic mess, his parents are faced with a mob of angry Springfieldians who have had enough. Homer and Marge desperately look to a child psychiatrist for help, who suggests that Bart take up drumming to channel his energy. Before long, Bart is laying down fills like a pro, getting into drum-offs with The White Stripes and jamming in a band with Lisa's favorite jazz musicians, so Lisa becomes jealous.

View episode script

The Mook, The Chef, The Wife And Her Homer

Production Code: #HABF15

Lisa befriends Fat Tony's son Michael, and Fat Tony invites the Simpsons over for dinner as a sign of gratitude. Shockingly, Fat Tony is shot by a rival family moments after Michael admits he would rather be a chef than take over the family business. Fat Tony's main thugs want Michael to be the new kingpin, but when he declines, Homer steps up and leads the family on a major mob spree, until Michael poisons the enemy.

View episode script