The Simpsons Season 9 Episode Guide

Natural Born Kissers

Production Code: #5F18

Homer and Marge's anniversary is an all-round flop, and their marriage is losing its spark, so they try to spice it up. After a few failed attempts, they discover that the fear of getting caught is the spark they require, so they go to the windmill on the mini-golf course. They quickly escape, forgetting their clothes, and run around the town naked. They steal a hot air balloon and end up landing in the middle of a football game, and make the news.

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Lost our Lisa

Production Code: #5F17

On a day off from school, Bart is rushed to hospital with a novelty-items-and-superglue related emergency, meaning Lisa can't go to an exhibition. She asks Marge if she can go alone, she says no, so Lisa tricks Homer into agreeing. Lisa gets on the wrong bus, and Homer goes after her after realising what she did. Lisa ends up out of town, and Homer somehow finds her, and the pair break in to the museum to see the exhibition. Bless.

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King of the Hill

Production Code: #5F16

At a church picnic, Bart is embaressed when Homer loses in Capture the Flag. Homer vows to become fitter, goes to the gym and eats only Powersauce bars. The company come to find him, and challenge him to climb the Murderhorn, Springfield's tallest mountain. He accepts, but ditches his sherpas half-way up when they try to cheat. He gives up, hammers his flag into the rock and the higher parts crumble, leaving him at the top.

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Trash of the Titans

Production Code: #5F09

Homer gets into an argument with the garbage men, and their service is cut off. When Marge writes a fake apology, Homer decides to stand for sanitation commissioner. He campaigns under the slogan "can't someone else do it?" and gains support for his crazy promises. He wins the vote, invests in his promises but spends all his money. He then charges other cities to use Springfield as a landfill, is found out, and fired from his position.

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Girly Edition

Production Code: #5F15

Lisa is chosen to be anchor of a new kids news show, and gets the help of Milhouse, Nelson and Bart. Bart is promoted to co-anchor, and, listening to Kent Brockman's advice, he goes out to see real people in a segment called 'Bart's People'. This backfires when, during a special live edition, Willie threatens to kill Bart for destroying his shack. Bart and Lisa agree to work together, but 'Kidz Newz' is cancelled. Homer gets a helper monkey.

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The Trouble with Trillions

Production Code: #5F14

Homer cheats on his tax forms in order to get them ready on time, and he is subjected to an audit. The FBI agree to let Homer off if he becomes a spy on Mr Burns - the alleged owner of a trillion dollar bill that he stole from the Government. Homer tries to find it at Burns' mansion, succeeds, and Burns is arrested. Homer changes his mind, and runs away with Smithers and Burns to Cuba - where they inadvertenty give the communists the trillion.

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Simpson Tide

Production Code: #3G04

Homer gets fired from his job, again, and decides to join the Naval Reserve with Barney, Apu and Moe. Bart gets an earring, but Bart takes it off him and takes it to sea. During war games, Homer is promoted to captain of a nuclear submarine, but Homer makes bad decisions and nearly prompts a war. The ship starts to leak, but, with the help of Bart's earring, Homer manages to plug the hole, and the submarine emerges from the water.

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This Little Wiggy

Production Code: #5F13

At the Springfield Knowledgeum, Marge notices Ralph Wiggum playing by himself, so arranges a play-date with Bart. Bart is embaressed by Ralph, until he notices the police master key. The pair steal the key one night and run into the school bullies, who suggest they go to the abandoned prison. The bullies throw the key inside, and Ralph runs after it to save it - but accidentally turns the electric char on before a publicity event.

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Lisa the Simpson

Production Code: #4F24

Lisa struggles to solve a brainteaser, and she fears that the dreaded Simpson gene is finally taking hold of her. Lisa finds evidence of her new-found stupidity, and she gives a speech on TV about how people should use their brains, not abuse them. Homer gathers relatives on the front lawn in a last-chance effort - and he finds out that the Simpson gene only affects the men. Elsewhere, Jasper freezes himself in the Kwik-E-Mart freezers.

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Dumbbell Indemnity

Production Code: #5F12

Moe meets his perfect woman on his way home one night, and she becomes attracted to him. He treats her like royalty, but, when he runs short on money, he devises a plan to get compensation if Homer can steal his car and put it on the railway tracks. Homer misses the train, so drives the car off a hill into the sea - and is caught by police. On the way to bail Homer out of jail, Renee notices an advert for Hawaii - but Moe feels too guilty.

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The Last Temptation of Krust

Production Code: #5F10

The Simpsons are invited to a stand-up comedy event, minus Bart's favourite, Krusty. He persuades Jay Leno to give Krusty a chance, and Leno gives in, but the clown's usual routine fails. Bart invites Krusty to live with them, where he asks for advice for his act. His new material doesn't make the family laugh, so he decides to retire. However, his speech makes the reporters laugh, so he tries to gain fans of his edgier comedy style.

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Das Bus

Production Code: #5F11

The children of Springfield Elementary go on a trip, but the bus falls off a bridge. Otto goes to find safety, leaving the kids alone, until they are washed onto a desert island. Their 'utopian lifestyle' fails, and they are left to rely on the cooler box from the bus. When they wake one morning, all the food has gone, and everyone suspects Milhouse. He insists that it was 'the monster', who turns out to be a hog. Homer starts an internet business.

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The Joy of Sect

Production Code: #5F23

Homer gets talked into going to a religious cult's retreat, and, while there, he is brainwashed into following 'the leader'. Homer signs over the family house to the leader, and move to an agricultural compound, and the leader takes over many media outlets in a bid to brainwash more people. The children, too, are brainwashed, so Marge escapes, and with the help of Reverend Lovejoy, Flanders and Willie, she snaps them all out of it.

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Bart Carny

Production Code: #5F08

The carnival's in town! Homer takes the family, and he and Bart meet Cooder and his son, Spud, who work on the ring toss. They trust Homer and Bart enough to let them take care of the store, but when they return, it's been taken by police. Guilty, Homer lets them live with them, but when they return one day, all the locks have been changed and they have moved in. Homer challenges them to a phoney game of ring toss for the deed.

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All Singing, All Dancing

Production Code: #5F24

Homer is shocked when he rents a western movie that turns out to be a musical, so Marge reminds him of their musical memories. Soon after, Snake breaks into the house and threatens to shoot them - but exits when their singing is 'just too wierd'. More clips follow, then he returns to shoot them for putting tunes in his head - but he has no ammo. When he returns again, the family are finished with their singing, so he leaves no problem.

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Miracle on Evergreen Terrace

Production Code: #5F07

Bart wakes up early on Christmas morning, but manages to burn the tree and all the presents underneath. He buries the melted tree in the front yard underneath the snow, and pretends a burglar stole the lot. The community get together and raise $15000 for the family, so they buy a new car, but it is destroyed. Bart admits there was no burglar, and the family are shunned. They return home to find their house looted, and their lies forgiven.

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Realty Bites

Production Code: #5F06

Homer buys a dangerous car at a police auction, so Marge walks home in protest. She meets Lionel Hutz, who persuades her to sell real estate. She is employed at Red Blazer Realty, but her honesty means she can't sell a house. When she finds out she must sell a house in her first week or she is fired, she clinches a deal for 'the murder house' - with the Flanders. Feeling guilty, she returns the cheque before the house collapses.

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Lisa the Skeptic

Production Code: #5F05

Lisa manages to stop the construction of a new shopping mall so that her school can dig for fossils. They find what appears to be the skeleton of an angel, which Homer loads into the car and displays in the garage to cash in. Lisa is convinced it isn't an angel, but a test proves inconclusive. The next day, the angel appears on a hill, with the words 'The End will come at sundown' - but it all turns out to be a promotion for the new mall.

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The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons

Production Code: #5F04

Apu becomes the most sought-after bachelor in Springfield, until his mother sends him a reminder of his arranged marriage. Homer tells Apu to pretend that he is already married, but then his mother comes to meet her. When she arrives, Homer tells him to pretend that Marge is his wife - but she catches Homer sleeping with Marge. The arranged wedding is set up, and Apu meets Manjula, who turns out to be his dream woman.

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Bart Star

Production Code: #5F03

Bart joins a football team, the Springfield Wildcats, coached by Ned. They go on a winning streak, but when Homer taunts Ned, Flanders makes Homer coach. Homer pressures Bart, but makes him quarterback when he remebers how his father pressured him. Bart causes the team to lose, so fakes injury, making Homer forfeit. Bart reveals his fake injury, so Homer apologises, Nelson is reinstated and the team win the championship.

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The Cartridge Family

Production Code: #5F01

Soccer fever hits Springfield, but the game ends up in a town-wide riot. Homer purchases a gun to protect his family, but Marge makes him return it. Instead, he hides it in the vegetable drawer, so when she finds it, Marge leaves the house - and Homer - taking the kids with her to a sleazy motel. Homer realises his mistake, rushes to find them, and manages to save them from Snake, who is robbing the reception when they are checking out.

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Treehouse of Horror VIII

Production Code: #5F02

In 'The Homega Man', whilst out purchasing a bomb shelter, France launches a bomb at Springfield and Homer is the only survivor - apart from the zombies who are out to kill him. In 'Fly vs Fly', Bart combines his body with a fly's using Homer's new matter transporter. And, in 'Easy Bake Coven', Springfield is a 17th-century town accusing and killing people suspected of witchcraft. Who is the witch? Marge, along with Patty and Selma.

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Lisa's Sax

Production Code: #3G02

In a fight with Bart, Lisa's saxophone gets thrown out of a window and crushed on the road. Homer tells the story of how she got her first sax, which starts with Bart being depressed at school. Lisa is discovered to be gifted, but, as they can't afford to send her to a gifted school, they explore other options. They decide to buy her a saxophone to express her gifts. Once the story ends, Marge persuades Homer to buy Lisa a new sax.

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The Principal and the Pauper

Production Code: #4F23

At a party marking Skinner's 20 years at Springfield Elementary, a man bursts in, claiming that he is the real Seymour Skinner. Skinner admits that he is, in fact, an imposter named Armin Tamzarian. He explains the story of him taking Skinner's name, resigns and moves to Capitol City. The town dislike the new Skinner, so they go to find him and persuade him to take his old job - and identity - back.

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The City of New York vs Homer Simpson

Production Code: #4F22

Barney is made Moe's designated driver, and takes off with Homer's car for two months. - returning, minus the vehicle. Homer receives a letter from New York, saying that his car is parked illegally. Reluctantly, he and the family go to get it back, and Homer finds his car parked in between the Twin Towers. The parking officer arrives while Homer is in a toilet, so he decides to drive home to Springfield - with or without the clamp on his wheel.

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